Open Marriage

[FlightlessDuck]

I wonder how people who do this file taxes.

 

[DaParkers]

An opinion can be more right than another opinion.

That's your opinion.

 

[CIA]

That's your opinion.

That wasn't an opinion, it was a fact.

 

[Principessa1284]

Here's my .02... anything two (or three, or four..) consenting adults want to do that doesn't hurt anyone is their own business. To the pursuit of happiness! If OP's friend (co-worker? I forget) and her husband are content with their arrangement, good for them! More people to drive the kid to soccer practice!

That being said, my husband and I have some very good friends who are swingers. We met them in line at Universal and they are the nicest, sweetest couple you'd ever meet in your entire life and have probably the best, healthiest marriage I've ever seen. They've been very happily married for a little over 10 years now and just welcomed their first child into the world a few months ago. They don't go out to date or form relationships independently of each other, but do meet others to spice up their marriage.

Recently, they had a BBQ at their house that we were invited to. After a while, we found out that some of their other friends there were also swingers. We all got to talking a bit later in the evening, and once they realized that we weren't going to grab a torch and chase them out of the village, were seriously the nicest, most welcoming people we've ever met. Some were DINKS, some had children at home, and some had children and grandchildren. They had all been married for 15, 20, 30+ years and couldn't be happier. They all had very normal jobs and very normal lives, with very normal children. Some of their adult children knew, some would never dream of telling them. I can't get over what a relaxed atmosphere it was- everyone was so non-judgmental and friendly.

So... I wouldn't generalize by saying ALL open marriages end badly or are bad to begin with. If a marriage is bad, it's going to (or should) end whether they decide to have an open marriage, or if one partner decides to cheat, or if one partner doesn't do the dishes on time.

 

[DaParkers]

That wasn't an opinion, it was a fact.

Prove it.

 

[distech]

Maybe we should start a swingers weekend at WDW.

 

[Thundergod]

Maybe we should start a swingers weekend at WDW.

Why do you think we are going to disneyland in July!

 

[ScottOKW2K]

Maybe we should start a swingers weekend at WDW.

You didn't get the memo ?!?

 

[bicker]

I'm not who you are addressing that question to but I will still answer. Divorce is okay because two grown adults should not be forced to live together if they no longer desire it.

That same kind of logic can be applied to support open marriage. That's the point. All we have here is a lot of personal preference being advertised as something more important than it is.

 

[bicker]

An opinion can be more right than another opinion.

And your opinion just happens to always be the one that is "more right"?

 

[bicker]

Not always but in this case yes. Do you know what my opinion is on this topic? I don't think you do.

Indeed, and it wasn't really important to what I was implying, which was essentially that any assertion that one's own opinion is "more right" than someone else's is almost surely off-target. You and I might agree 100% about the issue, but if it isn't a matter of scientific evidence backing up our perspective, than other folks choosing to believe something different is "just as right" as us believing what we believe.

 

[luvsJack]

And your opinion just happens to always be the one that is "more right"?

No, of course not. The right one would be MY opinion.

Ok, back to your debate.

 

[ChiCat]

I couldn't see DH and I in a open marriage.

I couldn't see us in a sexless one either.

Exactly. At this point why we are both healthy and able an open marriage is not for us. However if something were to change to make us no longer able I could see us opting for an open marriage.

I too know swingers that have a great marriage, but it would not be for us unless something drastic happened in our lives to change things.

 

[minniebride]

Ok, I won't mention any religion going forward, but I also do not like to be refered to as an animal. I understood your point, but I don't agree.

What would you prefer to be referred to as?? Humans ARE animals

 

[tlbwriter]

Well the reason that I say it's teaching the kids poor values is because only a small percentage of people engage in this type of relationship. So I don't feel it's right to pass that onto kids who are going to grow up thinking its the norm and will probably expect all their relationships to be that way because they're going to find out that most people aren't very receptive to that idea.

I can't imagine how any child who is exposed to any kind of media at all (books, magazines, TV, movies), or even other people, is going to think this is the norm.

I wonder how people who do this file taxes.

How would it impact your taxes?

 

[badblackpug]

It wouldn't work for me, but, hey.... to each his own. If they are happy, and this arrangement works for them, then I don't see a problem with it.

I used to work with a woman whose husband had very bad cardiac disease. He wasn't that old, and neither was she, but the cardiac issues left him impotent, and he was unable to take any of the medications for erectile dysfunction because of his heart medications, which he had to take to stay alive. They had an open marriage. She was free to seek out partners for physical reasons.

 

[ohiomom28]

I wonder how people who do this file taxes.

They aren't legally married. It has no impact on their taxes.

 

[Not My Fault!]

Why do you think we are going to disneyland in July!

Wait. What?