Official Desperate Housewives thread. Perfection not required. Mistakes welcome.

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Anyone notice the clock when DH ended tonight? Mine read 10:02. Anyone recoding this expecting it to end at 10:00 is going to miss the last couple of minutes. I wonder if they added more in for sweeps?

Deal or No Deal went over by two minutes, which put the evening off. We kept saying they weren't going to have enough time to finish DoND, but they put it all in, just went over.
 
admit I have always liked Orson too. So glad he isn't a killer.

The only reason he's not a killer is Mike didn't die when he tried to run him over. So I don't get how they make it that everything is alright with him. He still should have to answer for that and should have to do serious jail time.
 
I'm glad DH is coming back to it's original greatness. Tonight's show was great!!!

I also LOVE Andrew now. He is such a sweetie pie to his mother!!
I know. It's so funny how he's changed. And Danielle is starting to become a punk.

The only reason he's not a killer is Mike didn't die when he tried to run him over. So I don't get how they make it that everything is alright with him. He still should have to answer for that and should have to do serious jail time.
Because it's tv and Kyle is a cutie. He wasn't completely bad, just screwed up by his mother. And Mike's ok so all can be forgiven. ;)
 

It got bumped on my Tevo. I missed it all. Any major news?
 
I agree that this season is so much better than last season. My favorite line of the night was when Carlos was talking to Gabby and asked, "So how is it with Seabiscuit?" (Zach)
 
I am so glad to read that perfection is not required in this thread!!!! :cheer2: I just watched Desperate which I had recorded. I have one question. I watched the last episode too, but I just can't remember and I came in a few minutes late--what happened to Orson and why was he in the hospital?
 
I am so glad to read that perfection is not required in this thread!!!! :cheer2: I just watched Desperate which I had recorded. I have one question. I watched the last episode too, but I just can't remember and I came in a few minutes late--what happened to Orson and why was he in the hospital?

Mike is starting to get his memory back after going to hypnotherapy and he confronted Orson. Orson took off across the parking garage and ended up losing his balance and falling off the 2nd?? story of the garage, hitting a tree on the way down. I'm guessing that because he hit the tree on the way down was their reasoning for why the fall didn't kill him :confused3 that & it being TV land.
 
Mike is starting to get his memory back after going to hypnotherapy and he confronted Orson. Orson took off across the parking garage and ended up losing his balance and falling off the 2nd?? story of the garage, hitting a tree on the way down. I'm guessing that because he hit the tree on the way down was their reasoning for why the fall didn't kill him :confused3 that & it being TV land.

I do love TV land, it's such a happier place! It certainly is convenient that when Orson fell he was fine and when Alma fell she died. Thanks for refreshing my memory, I remember that now. :thumbsup2
 
ChristmasElf---where is your wonderful recap???

I missed it tonight, and knew I could count on you for the full juicy accurate detailed recap of the show.....pretty please??:)
 
This was def. a good episode! So many funny lines but, like another poster said, I liked Carlos's "Gonna warn the Scavo boys" line the best! I loved when Zack proposed to Gabby at the restaurant and she said "There will be no clapping!"

I had heard that they were going to kill someone off in this episode and figured it had to be Alma or Gloria or some inconsequential character. Do you think that Gloria is faking not being able to speak? Even if she is, it's for her own good otherwise she'd end up in jail b/c it was she who killed Orson's father, Monique, etc.

I wonder if Mike will get the memory of being hit by Orson back? And, if he does, will he be able to prove it? Or, do you think Orson will say "Look, you pushed me off the parking ramp roof so we're even". And, will Susan marry Brit guy or will she find her way back to Mike now that he's been exhonorated?

Oh -- in the previews -- Danielle's pregnant!? Bree's gonna hit the roof!!!!!!!
 
So, we know it's Danielle who's pregnant.....until she falls or something...then that story is over. I thought it was great how they explained Monique. btw, the show was scheduled to run until 10:03 last night, according to my tv....but, if TiVO records a show, doesn't it record it until it's over?? why only to a certain time? (I don't have TiVo, but I'm familiar w/ it)
 
I also LOVE Andrew now. He is such a sweetie pie to his mother!!


I like the "new" Andrew so much better but I hope they still keep some of his smart-butt ;) lines. I hated when he was a pukey little punk but I do like some of his smart alec comebacks (especially to his trashy sister).

Now, I missed last week so I will have to go read up on that.
 
I'm so glad Orson is not a killer. I know he ran over Mike, but I'm willing to forget that;) I just think him and Bree make a great couple.

Speaking of great couples, I wish Carlos and Gabby would get back together. It looks like they may be heading back that way, but Gabby seems to like their situation the way it is.

I don't think the salami -- I mean Zach, has given up on Gabby. I have a feeling we may have a stalker storyline in the works.
 
ChristmasElf---where is your wonderful recap???

I missed it tonight, and knew I could count on you for the full juicy accurate detailed recap of the show.....pretty please??:)

Sorry to be a bit late to the party!! Here ya go!!


We open with Orson in mid flight falling off the parking garage at the hospital. During his descent, he was recalling the days of his past and a certain one in particular. Seems the night his beloved Monique was killed, it was Orson's Mother that did the dirty deed. When he wanted to call the police, his Mother reminded him that he "owed her". Orson's memory then shows us Mike
coming through the door with the missing sink part. Orson sends Mike away by giving him money all the while Moniques lifeless body is laying on the floor in front of the sink.
Orson ends up digging a hole for the body while is Mother pries Moniques teeth out with pliers! (this woman has issues)

Orson has not landed. A tree broke his fall so the paramedic is able to find a pulse.

Gabrielle awakens to find Zach in her bed reading a newspaper. Zach has gone out of his way to convince Gaby that they had sex the night before. He has an open condom wrapper "Please tell me that once contained a mint" :lmao: Gaby asks when she sees it on the table. :lmao: She is now nauseated, jumps out of bed as Zach tells her that she was amazing last night and heads for the potty.

Tom Sciavo is flipping out about the resataurant opening tonight and is up at the crack of dawn baking breadsticks. Lynette sends him away with a bottle of sleeping pills as he continues to worry about salty breadsticks and if they should try a honey glaze instead.

Bree wakes up in the hospital with Andrew standing over her. Seems the show has given this guy a labotomy as now he could not nbe nicer to his Mother. When Bree asks about Orson, Andrew tells her that he jumped from the roof last night. Bree doesn't think he wanted to commit suicide though and Andrew then goes on to tell Bree that the ladder rung was tampered with making her fall no accident.

Ian has now shown up at the hospita to claim his dead wife's belongings. Susan is with him when Andrew comes out in the hall and tells Susan where Bree is. Susan and Bree make up as Bree tells Susan to trust her and that Mike will be a free man.
Meanwhile Ian has determined that the box the nurse gave him do not belong to his wife. The nurse sees that Helen (obviously a bumbling box labeler has screwed up the labels) :lmao: When the nurse walks away Ian finds an engagement ring in the box and when she returns he offers to take the box to Mike, but the nurse says that would be against policy.
Right then Susan reappears and tells Ian that Bree thinks Mike will be found innocent of everything and be a free man again. Susan hurries off to find flowers for Bree.

Mike and Carlos are in Mikes kitchen talking about Orson surviving the fall. Mike tells Carlos that depending on what Orson tells the cops he (Mike) could then be charged with attempted murder. Susan happens to be on the porch and overhears.

Lynette is on the phone with Andrew pleading with him to come to the restaurant for just 2 hours as she really needs him. Just then the chairs arrive for the restaurant. Problem all of them being HIGH chairs for babies :rotfl: Seems Lynette has ordered wrong and now has to go about finding 50 chairs for the opening by 5 pm. wut wo!

CArlos shows up at Gaby's who has now answered the door looking like death warmed over in a bathrobe. When Carlos questions Gabby about Zach leaving her driveway at 8 this morning, Gaby tries to say that Zach was dropping off a birthday card and balloons. When Carlos then says that he also Zach at 7 that morning in the driveway wearing only underwear, Gabby falls to the ground at Carlos feet, crying, we had sex last night and that she doesn't remember anything!
While Carlos recovers from this information, we see Lynette and a couplke of helpers running out Gaby's front door with her dining room chairs!!!
Carlos tells Gaby that he does not want to get involved, he can't believe she bagged another neighbor boy, and he leaves promising to warn the Sciavo boys!

Orson is in the hospiatl bed and wants to check out. The Hospital pyschiatrist tells Orson that he cannot leave until they discuss his mental health background including a mental health stay back in 1976. The hospital thinks Orson tried to commit suicide and he needs to explain.
Orson then fills the Dr in about how his Mother and Father were deeply religious and how is father ended up dying by drowning in a bathub of water. And how his Mother never forgave him.

We then see Gloria (Orsons Mother) on the phone. She has discovered that both Orson and Bree are in the hospital and goes to tell Alma that Orson tried to commit suicide. Remember Alma is still locked in the attic closet, and that Orson will soon come back to Alma when Bree is gone soon and Gloria leaves the conversation at that while Alma tries to find an escape.

Tom has woken up and arrives at the restaurant to see all the assorted chairs around the table. He is not pleased as Lynette tries to explain. She apologizes over and over but he is being a jerk about it.

Andrew is leaving for work and Danielle is upset that she now has to stay with their Mother Bree and will miss the pizzeria opening. Gloria hears this as Andrew speeds away.

Zach has spotted Gaby at the pizzeria and tells her that he is glad they are together and having the connection that they do. He then plays the guilt card by telling Gabby that he is finally happy since his Mom killed herself. Gabby runs over to Carlos and pleads with him to go up to Zach and threaten him.
When Zach steps into the mens room, Carlos and Zach are at the urinals. Carlos starts to talk to Zach but inadvertantly looks at Zach and notices his ahem, parts :happytv:
When Carlos gets out of the mens room, he informs Gaby that there is no way she had sex with Zach as she would have remembered, and taps a huge sausage that is hanging in the deli area of the pizzeria. :happytv: :happytv:

Gloria shows up at Danielles house with a pot of soup for Bree. She tells Danielle to go to the opening and she will stay with Bree. Danielle takes her up on the offer.

Meanwhile Alma has escaped the attic by crawling out a window and onto the roof. She loses her balance though and falls off landing in the bushes in what will be the second fall of the evening's episode. No one is around to hear the fall except for Danielle who didn't seem to notice.

Tom and Lynette are at their pizzeria when Tom tries to be nice to Lynette but she is not having it and walks away.
Mike sees Susan and tries to make small talk. Susan asks Mike about Orson falling from the roof, Mike tells her that he cant talk about it. Dissapointed, Susan walks away.
Gabby tells Zach that she realizes she did not have sex with him and that Zach is a liar. He denies this. Gabby tells him that he shouldn't lie to her. She doesnt want to be bribed.

Edie stands up and makes a toast to the pizzeria.
Tom thanks everyone for coming and admits that the chairs are not important that what is important is the people and his amazing wife and partner Lynette. Lynette also thanks everyone for coming.
Ian then takes this time to propose to Susan~!!! :love: Susan accepts.
Mike is seen looking on from a corner.
Of course, Zach now takes this time to propose to Gabby! :lmao:
"You moron, come with me" she roars at Zach. :rotfl2:

A nurse has now informed Orson that his wife checked out of the hospital, that his Mother called and wanted to be sure the hospital would be keeping him overnight.
Orson then picks up the phone to call Bree.

Gaby is yelling at Zach in the alley behind the pizzeria. She wants Zach to leave her alone and tells him that she will never love him. Zach leaves and Carlos comes out with a couple of beers asking how things went with SeaBisquit!! :happytv:
Carlos tells Gaby that he is having a hard time being Gaby's "friend" and that he doesn't know how long he will be able to hold on.

Andrew demands to know just why Danielle is out and not watching their mother who is at home in bed.

Cut to Bree who sees Gloria and tells her that she is sleepy. Gloria tells Bree to rest while Gloria draws her a nice warm bath. Next thing we see are a bunch of lit candles posed around the edge of the tub.
Gloria apologizes to the now sleeping Bree that she doesn't want to have to do this but she has no choice. She pulls the blanket off of Bree.
She places Bree in the bathtub.

Andrew has now arrived home, but Gloria is waiting and strikes him with a fireplace poker sending him careening down the stairs unconcious.
Gloria goes back to finish off Bree, placing a huge knife in Bree's fist, as Orson arrives in a cab. He checks Andrew, crawls up the stairs and finds his Mother with Bree and says to the Mother "You've done this before" referencing the bathtub and relating it to his fathers death.
Orson then slams his Mother into a closet door and he bends to retrieve Bree from the bath. His Mother stands and with her trusty firplace tool in hand clubs her son over the back and head with the tool. Orson then tries to drown Mommy dearest, but when he sees Bree slipping down in the water tosses her aside to save his wife.
Orson then carries Bree to the bed and a now awake Andrew is asked to find Bree some dry clothes and a warm blanket.
Gloria calls for Orson and informs him that she thinks she is having a stroke. "You need an ambulance Mother, it's too bad there is no one here that will think of calling her one" He then carries his Mother past Andrew telling him that he doesn't want his Mother dying in their house.
Orson carries her across the street to Alma's house where he lays her on the lawn next to Alma's dead body that he sees in the bushes.

Bree awakens to tell Orson that his Mother tried to kill her. Orson tells Bree not to worry that his Mother wont be able to hurt her, nor will Alma as she is dead. He doesn't know what happened, but he imagines that tomorrow morning a neighbor will stumble upon a gruesome surprise. 2 bodies side by side. The police will conclude that Alma fell from the roof and his Mother upon finding her will have had a stroke. When the police find the original suicide note that Alma wrote along with the bag of Moniques teeth, the police will have no choice but to exclude Mike dropping all charges against Mike.

Next we see Gloria sitting in a hospital bed. "Good news Mother, the Doctor has said that the stroke has left you completly paralized and that you can't even speak. That means all our secrets will be safe forever. Oh here's the best part, your brain is functioning normally, so I won't even have to worry about putting you in jail as you are already there.
Now, I'm going to turn your head so you can see me walking out the door. You won't want to miss it as it will be the last time you ever see me."
Orson then leaves.

As he is leaving the hospital, he starts thinking about his future with Bree.

The previews show us:
Tom and Lynette smooching on the porch
Gaby gets into a minor fender bender and ends up having dinner with the other driver.
Susan wearing an engagement ring and Ian wanting the wedding to be next month
Edie? introducing Carlos to her little boy?????
Danielle crying to Andrew that she is pregnant

The show won't be on next week due to the Oscars.
 
Thank you thank you thank you ChristmasElf!!! :thumbsup2

I feel like I didn't even miss the show thanks to your wonderful recap!:flower3:
 
I thought last nights show was really, really, really good and intense at the same time... I loved it! Way to improve the ratings!
 
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