Not Doing Christmas this Year

[Mouse House Mama]

I am so sorry that you are going throigh a rough time. I hope things get better soon. The only other thing I have to say is PLEASE put up your tree and celebrate the holiday. Gifts are not as important as you think. Pop popcorn and string it on the tree. Have the kids and you make ornaments (even if they are out of paper!) Bake some cookies etc. The holidays are about being together and making memories, not about the gifts. I can bet that your favorite memories are about being with people you love- not about a specific gift. The reason I say this is because life is short and tomorrow isn't promised. Celebrate with all your heart. Christmas is what you make it. I will pray for you.

 

[jennifer293]

You may also want to check with your school social worker/counselor. I know our schools have groups that often adopt families in our community anonymously...it is all handled by the school....no one knows who the family is and the family doesn't know where the gifts came from. Maybe they can help you make your morning more special.

All of our local schools do this..I even have people on my extended family that receive this help. It is ok to ask for help when you truly need it..

 

[jordansmomma]

Lisa,

When my oldest son was little things were always tight. I was very young when i had him and we struggled. But things seemed to manage a little. Even though we couldnt afford to buy a whole for Christmas, we were still able to have a great Christmas and started new traditions.
For example, make some coupons for kids for like a day with mom, a trip to the movies and put a date on for future use, there are always $1 bins at walmart, target & kmart. Or just do stockings for Christmas it can be simple and cheap.
Our Christmas eve tradition starts with chili cheese dip w/ chips, veggies, hot chocolate & pizza bites. We watch a Christmas Story and The Grinch who stole Christmas.
There are tons of things you can do with out spending a whole lot of money or any money.
Christmas wasnt always about presents, or toys......
It was the toy makers & retail stores that made CHRISTmas about the material possesions we desire.

Merry Christmas
Debbie

 

[vhoffman]

I feel for you--my dh was laid off over a month ago and no job in sight for at least until early next year. So far we've been living on unemployment and savings. what a lousey time to try to budget! We have 2 kids, 9 & 10. If it weren't for them, I'd say forget it for this year, its just a strain on our budget. But my kids are at an age where they will retain memories. We've had wonderful Christmases past, with trips to Disney, $2000+ of presents, etc., but they were too young to fully remember those. This Christmas they will remember. I will have Christmas for their sake.

The advice you've received here is all very good and I can only second it, but i have one more thing to say--while I wish your dh a long and happy life, it does sound like he has some serious health problems? What if he isn't here for future Christmases? I'm so sorry to put it like that, but the greatest gift of all is being together. I told my dd we wouldn't have as big a Christmas this year, she knows daddy lost his job. she made a card for us, with glitter and ribbons, like a big present. Inside it said "My family, the best present of All". That's from a 9-year old child. I will keep that card forever! OP, you and I are truly rich indeed to have a family. Anyone can go to the store and buy "stuff". You can't buy a family and love. Hold on to that thought and DO celebrate Christmas!!! Good luck

 

[EthansMom]

I understand about not wanting to ask for something for yourself because of pride and because you don't want to take away from others whose need may be greater.

I agree with others that there are many low/no-cost gift ideas that your kids would appreciate. One idea: you could check out a book or two for each child from the library and wrap it up as a gift. Also, ask your library if they have museum passes that can be checked out by patrons. Ours has passes for the zoo, state parks, and several museums. Also, many zoos and museums have a day that is "donation suggested". You could make a "ticket" on the computer to take the kids out for a day. Pack sack lunches and go to the museum.

Whatever you do, try to celebrate the joy of the season. It isn't about spending money, it's about being with the people you love.

May God bless you and your family!

 

[princessdisneybelle]

PM sent

 

[mouseketeer_mom]

PM sent

ditto, please check your messages

 

[Caitsmama]

I agree with the others.. while it may seem overwhelming, Christmas is NOT about gifts/ santa/ trees.. etc.. We give gifts on Christmas to celebrate Christ's birth; So, who says they have to be big/expensive/elaborate gifts? Gifts that come from the heart matter most, no matter how small. Your kids are old enough to understand the true meaning of Christmas, and i am sure if you have a heart to heart talk with them, they will be more understanding then you think.
I know as parents it is fun for us to watch our kids faces on Christmas morning, with presents and santa and the tree... But, we lose sight of the REAL true meaning of the day.
I would suggest hopping over to the Budget Board, and looking around there, there are some great threads for budget / handmade gifts! Also, some recipes for great treats!
And if you feel that there HAS to be presents under that tree, PLEASE don't be too proud to ask for help, that is what family is there for.
Good luck.
And Merry Christmas.

 

[lcrane]

Thank everyone for all of your response. We are going to put up the tree and we are having pot luck for dinner, Megan and Chase understand about there dad's health and about not having presents. The coupon Ideal for special dates with the kids sound great they would love that I had not even thought about that one. We are enjoying one day at a time I try not to think to far ahead because he will have 1 good day and then turn around and have bad days.

Thanks again everyone,

Lisa

 

[sanctus]

A really cheap gift idea is to make fudge or other candy and wrap it up as a gift. You can do chocolate covered pretzels really cheaply, too. They're a big hit around here. That would give you a little something to put under your tree as a surprise. I also agree with whoever suggested you make ornaments. There are some wonderful ideas on the internet for crafts you can make from stuff you have lying around. I know, it's not the gifts you wanted to give, but it's something to open in the morning.

Also, plan your morning so that you're not sitting around the tree remembering how it was before and what you're missing! Plan a nice breakfast and cook it together, plan some games. Celebrate what you do have, which is each other.

 

[shelly3girls]

I now realize as an adult that we had some tough years when I was growing up but honestly I never realized it. There are many gifts you can give your children without much money. This may have already been mentioned but something your kids might really cherish is a memory book of previous years. Maybe even a story of their life photo book. Take the time to organize all those memories that normally get tossed in a box. Knowing that your husband is ill would make this even more special especially if it focused on special memories with their dad.

 

[3princesses+aprince]

I don't really have anything to add. Just to say you and your family will be in my thoughts, and I hope your dh gets well.

 

[taximomfor4]

We always buy very little for Christmas/birthdays. But we have had terrible years when we could buy nothing. First, dh and I, in leaner years, never get each other anything...nothing at ALL. One year, when I just had one child (she was 3), I had no money at all. No oven, no phone, no cable, no bed. Well, obviously I couldn't run out and buy her gifts!! And she was young, so really believed still. I ended up working one day of overtime, so I went and bought her a coloring book and a movie (Little Women). Surprisingly, a friend at work got her Pinocchio (and wished her NOT to know who had bought it).

I had also signed up at the church (I was NOT a member) and she was put on the giving tree. I had asked for her to get a hat, mittens, and a sweater. She got all 3. So it worked out. I guess most would consider that a very lean Christmas, but dd was happy just opening something.

Is there a room in your house, where you could put paint handprints on the wall? On Christmas morning, you could get out the paint, and with some CHristmas music in the background, be thankful that you are all still together...and dip each person's hand in paint, making handprints on the wall. Free, lasts as long as you want it to, and captures the most important aspect of this Christmas for you guys.

BTW, as a child, I had birthdays with no gifts. It made me a bit sad, but I grew stronger trying to focus on what was really important.