Your instincts are fine, and don't let the commandos sway you. Two days on, one day off is a perfectly fine schedule. We have a standing rule that we NEVER do 4 parks in four days.
I completely agree. If you are rested at home and already dreading the pace, don't give in to the "no down days" philosophy. You already know it's not going to work for you.
Disney is really an expensive vacation and I can't see not going to the parks each day while there.
I will say arrival and departure days are perfect for shorter times at the park. You can have later times for flights. You don't have to leave early for flights.
We pack way ahead of the trip; so, we are ready to go way beforehand. There's no last minute hustle. This makes it easy and you are more rested not pushing the envelope every minute before the trip.
One key to be rested yourself would be to have time off before and after the vacation. If you work take an extra day off before you go and just rest. Ease up on chores the day before. Order out for meals the day before you travel; so, you don't have to cook.
Alternate doing rides, shows, parades and eating at the parks. The shows and eating will provide a rest. Doing ride after ride can get anyone more tired. Give yourself a chance to rest at the park. At times we will go for early entry at a park and cut out by noon and take a nap and then go back. Yes, you make two trips back and forth, but for us it's worth it. You get to experience the park in the daytime and nighttime that way. You will need to set up some ground rules for this to work with the kiddos.
If you have only one bathroom to share consider having some washing up good before bedtime while others wash up good when they get up the next day. Then, you are not having to do all at once which can be a little easier.
If there are two parents on the trip you can think about letting one parent go to the park while the other rests at the resort. You can take turns for this part.
Finally, consider babysitting services and get a chance to enjoy the park or a restaurant without the kiddos.
Some great tips here for traveling with little ones. I made sure to have a down day before we flew to MCO so that I could not stress over getting ready. AND DH finds it essential to have at least 1 full day at home before returning to work, too
BUT . . .
I could not disagree more. If you spend $175 for your hotel room, and use a day to do one or more of the following: play a round of golf, go to a Water Park, go to Downtown Disney, swim in the resort pool, rent a Water Mouse or pontoon boat...how is that more expensive than any other vacation day at any other resort? Sure, when you start to get into Grand Floridian pricing, it starts to be an expensive vacation. But anywhere from Value, through Moderate up to Swan/Dolphin or Bonnet Creek/Waldorf, you are pretty much paying less than or equal to whatever you would pay at any other resort. Compare the cost of a "beach day" at Hilton Head or Amelia Island or a "golf day" at Pinehurst or Doral with an "off day" at WDW and tell me that WDW is more expensive.
THIS . . .
We consider the resort part of the vacation. The resorts can be pricey and to us it's worth spending some time there since we are spending money on the resort too. Not just park tickets.
And THIS have become our new philosophy. I pay for a deluxe resort because it makes travel time with my tired kiddos so much easier (and mommy less tired!). Why would I spend that much money and never take advantage of the wonderful amenities? An extra day on the park pass only costs a few dollars, so it's a bargain, but not if I paid $250 for the hotel night to use it. In addition, there is SO much free around property that you are entitled to enjoy even if you are staying value. We always run out of time to check out those extras.
So, here's my most recent strategy: (and the best yet. Too bad DH is so burned on WDW that he didn't get to see how great it works. I still have to convince him for a longer trip.)
We got a nice discount for 3 nights at WL (arrived 1pm, DME for departure was at 2pm). Chosen for proximity to the non-park things we'd like to do (read: options and flexibility!), plus ease of transportation to my kids' favorite, MK. This was a Mom and kids trip, so all my decisions were based on making it easiest for me to do without help. I will definitely take this approach even with DH around next time.
I forced myself to buy a 1 day park ticket. I know that's an expensive proposition, but the theory still translates to a longer stay. If you are the go-go type, buy the minimum days that you need to achieve your must-dos and get your FPs. You can always decide up to the very last day to upgrade your ticket. But you can also more easily resist the temptation to keep pushing to get the most value from your paid-for tickets.
We do not travel during free dining or major holidays, so I decided to get ADRs on-the-fly. We also don't use the dining plan. All that racing to make it to our ADR, or even just feeling locked in for best use of credits or to avoid a no-show fee is stressful even if the meal is great. So we would decide the morning of, or even at lunch, to look for a dinner ADR or search the night before for lunch or breakfast. This worked great and allowed us to wing it a bit better.
Remember, winging-it can also be stressful, so I had a detailed itinerary with choices in mind (i.e. watch Wishes from Contemporary or ChipNDale Singalong) prepared ahead of time. This was to avoid the "I'm bored, now what?" problem.
In 3 1/2 resort days, only 1 was a park day. The trick was that I had options built in. Rather than trying to "keep my kids entertained" we just set out and I let them guide our non-park times. Or we agreed on a strategy and worked it around time of day and weather. They were so much happier being able to spend that extra 20 minutes searching for the right souvenir. If someone said "I want to watch cartoons and build Lincoln logs in the lobby" I was able to say "Yes!"
Park touring with kids is exhausting even if you're just strolling along. Just keeping track of them, nevermind juggling snacks and restroom breaks, wears me down. Exploring FW or the Boardwalk, or just hanging out at a resort can really be relaxing in itself. You are out of the crowds and the kids can have more freedom to wander while you aren't constantly counting heads and watching your step.
Another change I made (mine are 6 and 9), was a tiny backpack for each with a couple small snacks, an attached water bottle, and little things to play with in line (only 1 or 2). Anything they wanted to buy had to fit in their pack or be sent back to the resort. It was their job to carry the backpack. I didn't load my backpack down with absolutely every eventuality. Just disposable ponchos, money, sunscreen and camera. The rest I can get in a shop. We ditched the stroller, but for 4 years old I would still have a good umbrella stroller (not a big touring one that gets heavy). If one person goes to the restroom, everyone does. That alone saved us tons of stopping and starting.
I set expectations before we got on the plane. Let them know that mom can't do it all without dad and so this was going to be a team effort instead of every man for himself. Also, we would see tons of tempting things to do. They know we are coming back, and we took note of what to make a priority for next time. Worked like a charm.
Every trip gets better than the one before if you are mindful of what works for your family and make changes accordingly. Have a great time whatever you decide!