Nobby's Gnomies... heading to WDW in April 2010

[kschafer]

Hey girls, I just need to vent a bit this morning!

So you know that we don't have a relationship with Greg's family. When we first met, Greg wasn't particularly close to them and when we got married and Greg decided to take my name, they thought it was the ultimate rejection. When we first planned our wedding, Greg's brother was asked to be the best man and his sister was asked to be a bridesmaid and they both said yes. However, as plans progressed, niether of them seemed to be able to take the time to get measured for their tux/dress and finally we called and asked if they wanted to be in the wedding or not and they both said no. Ultimately, nobody from Greg's family came. We continued to send christmas cards and at least Patrick's birth announcement (which his mother sent back with a note asking that we never contact her again). Greg I think all along believed his brother and sister were just too afraid to stand up to their mom and didn't really make the decision on their own.

Well, the other day, for some reason, Greg decided to search for his sister on the internet and found that she has a facebook account. He sent her a message through my account and asked her to e-mail him. So last night he got a message from her. It basically asked what had made him so angry at the family that he had disappeared because she couldn't remember.

First of all, I realize she was 20 at the time but certainly she can't have forgotten that she was asked to be in our wedding and then didn't even show up. She can't have forgotten that she got married and didn't invite him to her wedding. Certainly she didn't forget that she got christmas cards and birth announcements and never even recognized them, or that she had a child and never told Greg.

I do NOT want to deny Greg the chance to have a relationship with his sister (she is 12 years younger than him and I know that he really helped care for her a lot when she was a child and he has fond memories of a close relationship with her) but I am scared about opening this door and where it will lead. Perhaps it will simply be an e-mail relationship and nothing more. But what if she decides to invite us to visit, or to a family event? I fear what will happen if Greg decides we should do something like this, what it will mean for us and for our boys. Greg has told me terrible stories about how his mom has treated his brothers step-daughter (because she wasn't "real" family). She made it known that when Greg took my name that he was no longer family and our children wouldn't be either.

Maybe I'm overreacting and it's only been 1 e-mail but I'm feeling a bit stressed and knew my gnomies would let me come and vent.

Thanks my dear friends!

 

[jenjolt]

Awww Katie This all must be very very frustrating! I will hope for the best for you and your family no matter what!!! And yes we are here to let you vent whenever you need it!

 

[ILuvCrush]

honestly katie...i dont even know what to say

I hope it all works out... it will one way or another

paula

 

[sunny_stace]

Good Morning Gnomies!

So weird, I tried to get on last night and the boards simply would not load! Did anyone else have that kind of trouble?

It is soooooooooooooo super hot here right now! Let me see....33 would be.....99F plus whatever the humidex is! It's sunny and my day off and I would love to sit on my back porch and read but its too hot! I love it, but I would just drown in my own sweat and that's gross!

I'm glad you're all enjoying your summer's so far! And you can all have my share of blueberries, I'm not a fan!

Katie - why are families always so messy?! As long as Greg goes into everything with his eyes fully open and doesn't get caught up in everything...people can change. You never know, I mean, my uncle David is here visiting right now from Arizona. He was my dad's brother but he was given up for adoption when he was a baby because my granny had had him with another man when my grandpa was away at war. He was sooooo angry with everyone in my family when he found us, but now we are one big happy family again! I hope everything works out okay but remember that you guys always have each other. And you always have us to vent to! I'm glad the interview went well too!

 

[Roxychica7]

Hey Katie-I agree with Stace, as long as Greg goes into it with his eyes open and no expectations of the past. As you know, my grandparents (dad's side) live next door. She made it clear one day that she didn't want to watch me anymore and my dad and mom took that as she didn't want me in their lives. They always left Christmas presents and birthday presents and my parents always returned them. It was a very hard thing for me, but after a while, I went next door and simply asked what Greg's sister asked, "What actually happened to make us not talk for 10 years?" Sometimes we get scared or our pride sets in, but ultimately we get caught up in fighting about something that we've blown out of proportion.
You just have to take it a step at a time, an email here and there. Just because he's starting to have contact with his sister does NOT mean there will be contact with the rest of the family, nor do you have to allow it. To this day, my dad still does not talk to the rest of the side of his family, aside from his parents. One extra family member in the picture could be awesome, just relax and let things go one day at a time. Good luck girl!

 

[julezdisney]

Hey everybody! The worst cramps and nausea today ever! Ugh!

I just ate a cheeseburger and a bacon/cheese baked potato. Hopefully the "comfort" part of comfort food will settle in.

Katie- my Dad didn't talk to his 2nd oldest brother (there are 4 of them all together) for more then 20 years. Uncle Dan and Aunt June once told my parent's that our family would need to stay in a hotel when we came down to visit around 1979 or 1980ish. My Dad was so angry he never spoke to them again until 2000 @ a family reunion. They are now the closest of the 4 brothers. How nuts is that?! 20 years lost for no good reason. Aunt June used to be, as legend tells it, a fill-in-the-blank, but she has really changed into a very sweet, caring, humorous woman. You never know what will happen or how people will change. As long as you guys are cautious, more family would be great, in the end, right?!

Anyway, I'm glad we're here for you to vent to.

My turn!!!!!!!

My in-laws are nice people. But I really wish they were more traditional grandparents for our kids. Our vacation isin 10 days and I wrote to DMIL to ask her if there were any specific plans being made. That we might want to take a family day to the zoo in Fort Myers, and that Jim and I would like a day to ourselves, if they could watch the kids.

She writes back and said, "But like I said if is ok with DFIL you guys can take the kids to the zoo."

Uh- hello? You're grandparents! Dont' you think you might like to take your grandkids to the zoo?

And she DID say Jim and I could go alone one day. At least I have that. I wrote back and said, "Oh never mind. Jim and I can take the kids to the zoo any day."

Argh! I really wish I hadn't agreed to this trip. If I hadn't, we'd still be going to Disney in September! Blah!

Back to work.

 

[Lady Lallie]

Katie, I think Stace and Jess are on the right track. Speaking of family, has there been any other developments with his daughter? I know you mentioned it awhile ago.

How are the rest of the gnomies today? I am starting to fade fast. I need to go bed early tonight, this falling asleep after 1AM is ridiculous.

 

[kschafer]

Thanks for all the advice guys. I honestly do appreciate it. I come from a family that is very close and just haven't had to deal with things like this before. I KNOW that Greg will do everything to protect our boys and if things don't go well he will walk away.

Well to add some more crappy news. As I was typing the above, I got a phone call and was told I didn't get the teaching job. They went with the person with a chemistry certification over my experience. The principal said I had a great interview and if I had the certification, I would have gotten the job (I do have a general science certification, just not chemistry) I called Greg and I'm sure he is pissed! I must confess I am a little stunned about it.

A couple weeks ago Greg ran into the former principal of his high school who is now the superintendent at a nearby school. He told Greg they would have a 1/2 time opening. I just called and talked to him and he said the opening is still tentative but I should fill out an application and send in my resume. It would certainly be an interesting job! It is at the indian settlement school and they have some interesting attitudes toward education. The good thing however would be that they just opened a brand new top-of-the-line school (amazing what gambling revenues can pay for!)

 

[Roxychica7]

See Blake and I are the complete opposites from you and Greg. Blake is like you, the one with the very close family, and I'm like Greg, has some family separations and conflicts. All will work out for you Katie, we'll be thinking about you!

That sucks about the job though!! At least you knew there was a possibility of you not getting the job. Definitely apply for the other one though! Sounds like it definitely could be an interesting experience!

 

[kschafer]

Sorry LL, I didn't answer your question about Greg's daughter. She e-mailed him and told him she was having some problems with her boyfriend and asked if he could help her out with money. YIKES, I hate to think of her dealing with problems given her circumstances but the bottom line is we do not know her well enough to just start handing over money (especially given that one job prospect for me is now closed!)

Yes, the stress in my life seems to be building! I guess Greg was right when yesterday we made some decisions about where to stay and when on our vacation and he told me to wait until I heard about the job before making reservations. We may end up just doing the Michigan leg (thank god for family and free accomodations and food! Yes, I love my family )

 

[Lady Lallie]

Oh goodness, Katie. You are really going through the wringer right now.

How are the rest of my gnomies tonight?

I'm bored.

 

[2xcited2sleep]

Katie! I can't add any additional words of wisdom to the ones the gnomies have already shared with regard to the family questions. My family is certainly not perfect but I've never had to deal with anything like that and am counting my blessings! So sorry about the job. But that new option sounds intriguing!!

Julez- hope the cramps got better. A cheeseburger always cures what ails me. On my drive home today, in fact, i was thinking about WDW cheeseburgers. Sorry about the frustration with the in-laws. I know it's not a Disney vacation but I'm sure you'll have fun!!

LL- hope you are able to sleep tonight!

CP- did you get out of your pj's today?

 

[Charleston Princess]

CP- did you get out of your pj's today?

I did, eventually! I had to go pick Connor up from a friend's house.

 

[2xcited2sleep]

I did, eventually! I had to go pick Connor up from a friend's house.

They make some cute pj's these days. I saw in the supermarket, of all places, that Hanes made some pj pants with martini glasses on them. How perfect would those be? I have to check and see how much they are!

Maybe for a gnomefest pj party!

 

[Charleston Princess]

They make some cute pj's these days. I saw in the supermarket, of all places, that Hanes made some pj pants with martini glasses on them. How perfect would those be? I have to check and see how much they are!

Maybe for a gnomefest pj party!

Oh, I want pajama pants with martini glasses! They would also be perfect for your Food and Wine festival trip!

 

[ILuvCrush]

hi my gnomies!!

I come with a heavy heart....

me thinks that I'm not going to make it to gnomefest.


They posted Allison's major meet schedule... sectionals is the 24-25 of April.
She can't miss it... or she can't advance to states.... i can't miss it... because well, i'd be the worst mama in the world if i did.

I may..or may not.... try to come down monday 26th to Thurs or Fri.... but I know that there is a good chance I'll end up missing some of you. It's all gonna depend on being able to schedule vacay that week or not.

just wanted to throw that out there... since with that in mind...I don;t think that my opinions/votes should really be counted...

regardless of whether I get to go or not... i am SO PROUD TO BE A GNOMIE!!! I LOVE you girls like sisters!!

Paula

 

[2xcited2sleep]

hi my gnomies!!

I come with a heavy heart....

me thinks that I'm not going to make it to gnomefest.


They posted Allison's major meet schedule... sectionals is the 24-25 of April.
She can't miss it... or she can't advance to states.... i can't miss it... because well, i'd be the worst mama in the world if i did.

I may..or may not.... try to come down monday 26th to Thurs or Fri.... but I know that there is a good chance I'll end up missing some of you. It's all gonna depend on being able to schedule vacay that week or not.

just wanted to throw that out there... since with that in mind...I don;t think that my opinions/votes should really be counted...

regardless of whether I get to go or not... i am SO PROUD TO BE A GNOMIE!!! I LOVE you girls like sisters!!

Paula

Well, first of all... right back at you and love you like a sis too. And of course your kiddos have to come first!

But so sorry dates seem to be conflicting. I am going to remain optimistic and hope that things work themselves out... as they tend to do.

And, if not, we'll just have to plan *another* trip. Or cruise. What do y'all think of a Disney Cruise say 2011?

Or there is the DIS Unplugged Cruise in Dec of 2010...

 

[kschafer]

OH Paula I hope things end up working out but I know things will get in the way of all the best laid plans. Hopefully you could join us for even a short while! You are and always will be a gnomie and I think your votes should continue to count!

 

[ILuvCrush]

Well, first of all... right back at you and love you like a sis too. And of course your kiddos have to come first!

But so sorry dates seem to be conflicting. I am going to remain optimistic and hope that things work themselves out... as they tend to do.

And, if not, we'll just have to plan *another* trip. Or cruise. What do y'all think of a Disney Cruise say 2011?

Or there is the DIS Unplugged Cruise in Dec of 2010...

Cruise would be lovely!! but that will take some serious fandangling with paris that year... wanna come on that trip???... we will find you a REAL frenchman

 

[2xcited2sleep]

Cruise would be lovely!! but that will take some serious fandangling with paris that year... wanna come on that trip???... we will find you a REAL frenchman

OMG. Would LOVE to go! Talk about Ooh la la!