No Proposal!?!?

[Petals & Pixie Dust]

Ok so BF and I were watching License to Wed last night and in the opening scenes their is a proposal. At which point, I look at BF and say "You better not ask me to marry you in front of our whole family. I really don't want to deal with the emotional embarrassment." (I'm not sure how I am going to react, but I don't want to feel self conscious or have it come back to bite me at some family reunion-JMO)

So, he replies to this, "Oh there isn't going to be a proposal. We are just going to T&Co. & get your ring." My next reaction was, "You're not going to ask?" To which he said, "Do I have to? We both know this is what we want. All we need is the metal to prove it. Am I wrong?" I told him he has to at least ask. I promise to say yes...but I still want him to ask. He then drops the subject and that was that...(which I will be more than happy to bring up later and set him straight...Don't you worry about that...I will get a proposal...AS my mom says, it just has to be his idea...)

We've been together 7 years. So, we won't be getting much of a congratulations from people when we get engaged. It will be more like "It's about time." We know this is what we both want...but still can you imagine...No proposal!?!?!

My mom and dad have been married for well over 35 years. Dad never asked mom to marry him. His mother introduced my mom as his fiance and they looked at each other shrugged and said "ok why not."

I was a little flustered by this...thank you for letting me vent. I am sure he will do what he is supposed to...and if not...well, then he will get embarrassed at family reunions for not asking..

 

[dislovr]

Well at least he knows now that it is an absoutely must so im sure it will happen now that he knows. Some pixie dust for you
Your parents "Proposal" as you will have it reminded me of mine kind of. We were having dinner with all my family at my grandmothers chruch. For some unknown reason (unknown still to this day) she was introducing Dave (my DFi) as my fiance.
I was just like whatever, Dave was like "when did this happen?" and my mother was kind of annoyed. Anyway because of this Dave proposed when we got home. He had the ring and was saving it for when it felt right and he thought it was the right time. Grama must be a phychic or something.
Besides gram was thrilled when she found out she had something to do with the proposal!

 

[Petals & Pixie Dust]

Thank you for the pixie dust! I'm pretty certain he is waiting for our T&Co. trip after I graduate.
I guess in my mind I figured he would do something to knock my sox off. In the beginning of our relationship I told him he had to complete 3 things before I ever said yes to a proposal. He has done all 3. They were;
1. Send me purple roses
2. Remember that my birthday and Valentine's day are seperate events on the same day (We celebrate my birthday in the AM and Valentine's Day in the afternoon-always have and I always get 2 gifts with different paper and everything )
3. Take me ice skating at Rockefeller Center (which he did...it took a little fighting...it's a great love story...maybe I'll post it in my planning journal when I finally have the guts to put one together...)


I guess we will see what happens. So, here is to hoping that should I happen to order the disney planning video in the near future he doesn't freak
*he won't...he has already told me to go and buy magazines and start planning*

 

[lurkyloo]

Is there a chance he could be planning a surprise and is trying to throw you off the scent? Maybe...? I just know that some men don't like to think they're being told how the proposal should happen because they want it to be a surprise - maybe he got freaked out and said the first thing he could think of?

On the other hand, I've seen plenty of posts on this board where there was never an official proposal, and that suited the couple just fine.

 

[Lynn5700]

Yeah maybe he is trying to throw you off!!! Hey at least he's going to buy you a ring from Tiffany's!!!!!!!!!!! Aww it will be like sweet home alabama..pick any ring you want lol.

 

[Petals & Pixie Dust]

Is there a chance he could be planning a surprise and is trying to throw you off the scent? Maybe...? I just know that some men don't like to think they're being told how the proposal should happen because they want it to be a surprise - maybe he got freaked out and said the first thing he could think of?

On the other hand, I've seen plenty of posts on this board where there was never an official proposal, and that suited the couple just fine.

He totally could be trying to throw me off. My boy has a tendency to have a master plan and not let people in on it. However, he keeps saying that all we need is the metal to prove it. Either way this man is mine and I'll take him! We're good together and he is definately my prince.

Yeah maybe he is trying to throw you off!!! Hey at least he's going to buy you a ring from Tiffany's!!!!!!!!!!! Aww it will be like sweet home alabama..pick any ring you want lol.

He actually really liked that movie...Especially the part where the mother says something like "What is this? She has an ice rink on a very important finger!" He must have said that for days after we saw the movie.

The T&Co thing was a bit of a battle. I honestly think we could get the same quality elsewhere and he refuses. He says all the jewelry he has gotten me has come from Tiffany (it has) and that this will be no different. He says it's "our thing."

Then one day I was sitting in my social psychology class and the professor said that the more a man puts into a ring: thought, money, etc. The more he has invested into the relationship and the more that he will be willing to work it out. That was it, I was sold. No more me battling over the ring. He wants a T&Co ring...far be it from me to stop him!!!

 

[tink774]

I hope that you do get your proposal! I'm sure that if he knows how important it is to you, he'll come through!

My DBF of three years and I just started talking about making concrete plans to get married either three or four years from now. We've known that we wanted to get married for a long time, but now we're actually trying to get solid plans together. And it occured to me, I still want the proposal, too! So he assured me that yes, he is still planning to do it!

Dad never asked mom to marry him. His mother introduced my mom as his fiance and they looked at each other shrugged and said "ok why not."

This is so cute!

Best of luck with your planning, and I'm sure you'll get a wonderful proposal. Are you hoping for a Disney wedding or honeymoon?

 

[caryndisneydiva]

i never had an official proposal, but i never really expected one. we came to an agreement.

i agree with everyone else though, he COULD just be throwing you off the trail!

 

[DecemberBride]

No proposel here either... though I do expect a ring, is that a bad thing!

 

[DisBride2007]

We were also together for 7 years and I didn't get a proposal either. I got a phone call at work one day, "Hey let's go ring shopping tonight." I would have liked to get a romantic proposal but oh well. It was just kind of annoying when people asked how he proposed and I had to just say, "Well..."

 

[The Blue Parrot]

My wife and I had been dating for almost 9 years before we got married.

One year, it was time for both of us to pick vacations where we worked. Came down to, "So, what do you want to do this year?" I can't remember which one of us said it, but the answer was, of course, "Let's get married!"

And instead of an engagement ring, I gave her a car so I wouldn't have to drive her to work!

And yes, we're still married some 20 odd years later...

 

[spacerangerqueen]

Sounds like my DBF. One night at dinner we were randomly talking and came up with the fun idea to just go on a cruise and get married. We'd invite our parents on the cruise and then surprise them with the ceremony. We'd buy wedding bands and the ring he gave me for christmas (to replace the class rings i threw in the garbage and were incinerated on the Magic last March ) would serve as an "engagement" ring.
Well we realized some planning would be nice and we wouldn't spring it on our family. We agreed that he would propose by the end of the year but apparently he thought we would get married by the end of the year too! He knows I'm doing some preliminary planning and is looking at what he wants for his own ring etc. But I refuse to start the ball rolling until he proposes!

 

[Mrsdisneyb2b]

We arent engaged yet but are planning out wedding. He knows I want the proposal but, I don't care about a ring... just the fact tthat he asked will mean the world... now lets see when that happens? (prob the day before the wedding haha)

 

[Mrsdisneyb2b]

We arent engaged yet but are planning out wedding. He knows I want the proposal but, I don't care about a ring... just the fact tthat he asked will mean the world... now lets see when that happens? (prob the day before the wedding haha)

 

[Ennazus8810]

We didn't have a proposal either. Somehow we just started talking about getting married, and we went ring shopping that night. Got married 7 month later!

 

[jnale]

I didn't think I was getting an "official" proposal and then 2 days before our 10 year anniversary he surprised the heck out of me.

People would give him a hard time saying "what are you waiting for" because we had been together so long and he would say things like "oh, there's plenty of time". I guess he would say that to throw me off.

After he proposed he specifically asked if I knew it was coming and when I told him I had no idea he was very proud of that!

Your day like this will come too - he's probably doing the same thing. Throw you off track so you'll be extra surprised!

 

[Mrsdisneyb2b]

We didn't have a proposal either. Somehow we just started talking about getting married, and we went ring shopping that night. Got married 7 month later!

I wish our family was okay with that!! But, vin wants the proposal to be a memory I will never forget!

 

[Petals & Pixie Dust]

Sorry I'm behind...Finishing the semester, finals next week!!! Anyone want to come to NY and take my stats final for me? *JK*

I hope that you do get your proposal! I'm sure that if he knows how important it is to you, he'll come through


Best of luck with your planning, and I'm sure you'll get a wonderful proposal. Are you hoping for a Disney wedding or honeymoon?

He always comes thru for me. I think I can honestly say that if I have ever asked for something I've gotten it. (boy do I sound spoiled!)
Disney Wedding. 10-12 person guest list/Escape Wedding. No I haven't been planning or anything... Ok so just about everything is planned. He knows it...he did some of it too! The only thing that isn't figured out is the home reception.

i never had an official proposal, but i never really expected one. we came to an agreement.

i agree with everyone else though, he COULD just be throwing you off the trail!

I think you're right. He tries to be sneaky with surprises, but I usually figure it out. This surprise I don't want to know about. I'm curious as to what my reaction will be.

No proposel here either... though I do expect a ring, is that a bad thing!

Nope. I just don't want my man to sell his kidney and part of his liver for a ring *LOL* (its what we tell each other when something is ridiculously expensive...but he is set on T&Co. I'm done fighting with him about it. I've tried to even tell him I'd be happy with a piece of string with glitter on it and no go...

We didn't have a proposal either. Somehow we just started talking about getting married, and we went ring shopping that night. Got married 7 month later!

We've been talking about it for 7 years. We were friends probably 2 years before and it just turned into more I tell people I have the pop-up wedding. He asks, we pull the cord and there it is. Plans are done and we just need a date. I want sometime Monday thru Thursday and he wants value season. I'd like it a little further out from Christmas and birthdays so we have something in the middle to celebrate. He doesn't care so much about that-just as long as the weather isn't super hot.

Like I said, people won't be saying congratulations...they will be saying it's about time. I'm waiting for his grandmother to say something...She has gotten pretty blunt in her old age...but she is a hoot!

Thank you for all of the posts. I feel better that I'm not the only one out there...if you know what I mean....

OK off to order the planning video. What the heck.

 

[Joy2theWorld]

We did the T&Co. visit... Well, actually I went the weekend before and picked out a few. He called and ordered one of the ones I picked and then we drove down the weekend of Valentine's to get it. (There wasn't one in our state at the time.) However, he made me wait until he actually asked the next day when we got home. It was hard knowing that ring was there and I couldn't have it! I'm glad he asked officially, but I don't know if I would have cared all that much though. It is hard not to be jealous of those super romantic proposals though.

 

[Petals & Pixie Dust]

We did the T&Co. visit... Well, actually I went the weekend before and picked out a few. He called and ordered one of the ones I picked and then we drove down the weekend of Valentine's to get it. (There wasn't one in our state at the time.) However, he made me wait until he actually asked the next day when we got home. It was hard knowing that ring was there and I couldn't have it! I'm glad he asked officially, but I don't know if I would have cared all that much though. It is hard not to be jealous of those super romantic proposals though.

My BF is well...a super Geek! <---this is very him! Over the years I have learned that sometimes it isn't the item he is giving me, but the thought that he puts into it that counts. For example, he has only bought me flowers twice in 7 years. BUT he has picked me up a thumb drive b/c I needed one for school...or the time he bought me this really cool caribeaner b/c it has a loop for a water bottle on it...things like that. So, when he says things like "do you think you are the only one that plans stuff..." and goes to the T&Co site...you know he is doing his part too.
Maybe my story is supposed to be all the 7 years planning we've done!!! and that I've waited