Newly Married Kids: Sharing Time w/ In-Laws in same town? Dividing time?

[Darcy03231]

We always have Christmas with my side of the family on the Sunday before Christmas. All the extended family is there and it works out great as no one has to rush out to be somewhere else.

DH's family lives 18 hours south of us and really doesn't celebrate Christmas. His sister (his only sibling) lost her son at Christmas so its not a great holiday for her. They prefer to get together as a family over Thanksgiving instead. Some years we go and others we don't, they never make a big deal over it. We try to get down at least once a year, although no one ever comes north

Christmas Eve and Christmas Day we spend at home with our children. Anyone who wants to come is welcome to spend it with us. Most years my parents come for Christmas morning and dinner (my brother goes to his in-laws, as does my sister).

 

[midwest-mom]

So for those of you, or your adult children, who travel to see your families - where do you stay? Our DS and DDIL are just over 4 hours away, and plan to alternate nights here and at her house. Although we live very close, that just seems like alot, and yet it was their idea. I'm grateful but I hope they aren't sorry they did.
So were do you stay or your adult children, when traveling home?

 

[HannaBelle]

My parents and my IL's live within 20 miles of our home. During the early years of our marriage, DH and I would flip back and forth from house to house for all holidays. We have been married 17 years.

My younger brother married his younger sister 10 years ago. It made the schedule even more demanding b/c it was like we were "abandoning" one family or the other...tons of guilt and stress all around.

About 6ish years ago, DB and I developed a schedule of where our families would be for what holiday. It sounds ridiculous, but it is WONDERFUL. No gets their feelings hurt or feels cheated. (Or at least they do not complain to me! lol)

NYE - on our own
Easter - DH's family
Mother's Day - alternates each year
Memorial Day - on our own
Father's Day - alternates each year, but opposite of Mother's Day
4th of July - my family
Labor Day - on our own
Thanksgiving - alternates
Christmas Eve - alternates (whoever's year it is for Thanksgiving, gets Christmas Eve)
Christmas Day - alternates, but we always spend the morning at home

It has worked out wonderfully!!! No more guilt for me about not coming to so and so's house on such and such day...everyone knows the schedule and works with it.