Nervous about birthday party.

[connorlevismom]

My DS just started kindergarten this year and has been a about 10 birthday parties so far and also had his birthday party 2 weeks ago. Every party has been at the same place, Pump It Up. It is this huge inflatible place that the kids love. I wish I would have come up with this idea because those places have to make a fortune!

Anyway, he just got invited to a childs party, but the party is at his home. We don't know the parents of this child and he is not one of DS's out of school playmates. He really wants to go but I am really nervous to send him to someone's house that I don't know. I am sure that it will be fine and I will let him go, I am just nervous. Am I irrational to worry so much?

I will not keep him home from the party because this boy came to his party and I feel it is important to do the same. It is just the first time that I will be dropping him at a home like this, not knowing the parents. Has anyone been nervous about something like this? How did you not sit and worry when they were gone?

Kristine

 

[Mouse House Mama]

Nobody drops their kids off that young here. The parents would all be staying. I would not be comfortable leaving my child at someone's house that I didn't know at that age either.

 

[perpetualplanner]

When my sons were that young and I didn't know the family I would just stay for 15 minutes or so to "make sure he got settled in". If after those 15 minutes you aren't comfortable you can always "remember something that needed to be done." Also, at that age there were still some parents that would hang out during the party so that's a possibility too. I would try to call the parents and at least chat for a bit to get a feel for them and go from there.

 

[nmmom95]

Nobody drops their kids off that young here. The parents would all be staying. I would not be comfortable leaving my child at someone's house that I didn't know at that age either.

 

[connorlevismom]

I feel really bad for the child. I don't think that his parents can afford a party outside the home and I don't think that he should be punished for that. I mean, how horrible would he feel if nobody showed up?

 

[MSSANDRA]

In our area, parents stay at that age. I would not leave him somewhere you do not know the parents. You have no idea what the situation may be safety wise. I would either plan to stay or RSVP no. I understand wanting to repay a invite but this would be out of my comfort zone.

Only other thought...Do the boys have any friends in common that parents might know the family well???

 

[fortheluvofpooh]

I wouldn't leave him there by himself if I didn't know the parents personally. So that said, if he went I would go and just hang out and get to know the family. Go and have fun.

 

[connorlevismom]

That sounds good. My DH is actually going to bring him so he will have to hang out. My DD is getting Baptized on Sunday so I will be busy getting ready for that.

I hope the parents will be OK with parents hanging out.

 

[mjkacmom]

I feel really bad for the child. I don't think that his parents can afford a party outside the home and I don't think that he should be punished for that. I mean, how horrible would he feel if nobody showed up?

Why do you feel bad for the child? I know many people who can afford lavish parties who have them at home. I'm going to say 25% have home parties, and in kindergarten, some parents actually stay (not me - I usually know another mom who is staying). Because they are rarer, my kids prefer home parties over parties out. Unfortunately, our home isn't that big, and most of my kids' birthdays are in the winter, so I'm forced to have them out.

 

[Hannathy]

Around here everyone just drops and leaves. I would not want a group of adults standing around doing nothing for 1.5 hours. What in the world do you think is going to happen with a whole class full of kids at the house? sell them into slavery? For goodness sakes the paranoia is really running wild anymore. It is a kids party not a family party. I never had any adults stay and I never stayed at any party and surprise, surprise my kids have lived and are fine (also independent!) Kids need time away from parents.

I would walk them to the door, double check what time to pick up and then go have 1.5 hours of kid free time.

 

[connorlevismom]

Why do you feel bad for the child? I know many people who can afford lavish parties who have them at home. I'm going to say 25% have home parties, and in kindergarten, some parents actually stay (not me - I usually know another mom who is staying). Because they are rarer, my kids prefer home parties over parties out. Unfortunately, our home isn't that big, and most of my kids' birthdays are in the winter, so I'm forced to have them out.

What I mean is that I feel bad for him if nobody comes because it is at his house. Not that I feel bad because his parents can't afford anything else. I just picture this 6 year old all excited about his party and then being so sad that people did not show up.

None of the other parents know his parents either so hopefully other parents plan on staying too. I have emailed a couple of my DS's playmates moms to see if their kids are going.

I am sure that his parents are very nice, it is just something that I have never had to deal with before so I am a little nervous about it.

 

[Hannathy]

I am sure that his parents are very nice, it is just something that I have never had to deal with before so I am a little nervous about it.

Why? see this is what I don't understand. What is there to be nervous about? What do you really think is going to happen? Do you really think so poorly about people in your neighborhood, school that your child can't be around them for a couple of hours? I really don't get it.

 

[princessmom29]

No one here drops kids that young and leaves, even at Pump it Up. However, if you have been leaving him at the other parties to be supervised by the bithday child's parents I don't see how this would be any different just because it is at a house.

 

[connorlevismom]

Why? see this is what I don't understand. What is there to be nervous about? What do you really think is going to happen? Do you really think so poorly about people in your neighborhood, school that your child can't be around them for a couple of hours? I really don't get it.

Because there are a lot of really strange people out there and you just never know. Look how many freaks are in the world and the amount of people who "trusted" their kids around them.

I don't know why your so hostile about it.

 

[MyDizneyBoyz]

It's also perfectly okay to call the birthday boy's parents and quite honestly ask. Explain that DS is your oldest, you're new to the whole birthday party at home thing and don't want to presume either way that parents will be dropping kids off or staying for the duration. You can't go wrong with honesty.

If a parent called me with that kind of question, I'd be all over encouraging them to stay and be another set of hands! My oldest is turning 6 next month and all the parents around here are still in the "stay for the duration" mode so we usually have backyard BBQ type of parties to cater to both kids and adults.

 

[MSSANDRA]

Around here everyone just drops and leaves. I would not want a group of adults standing around doing nothing for 1.5 hours. What in the world do you think is going to happen with a whole class full of kids at the house? sell them into slavery? For goodness sakes the paranoia is really running wild anymore. It is a kids party not a family party. I never had any adults stay and I never stayed at any party and surprise, surprise my kids have lived and are fine (also independent!) Kids need time away from parents.

I would walk them to the door, double check what time to pick up and then go have 1.5 hours of kid free time.

How do they know it is not a family party??? Our parties had both school friends and family. How do you know it's a safe home?? How do you know they know or care about gun safety?? How do you know the children will be supervised outdoors?? Do they have unsafe pets???

Chances are they are a nice family and just want to give their child a simple cake and ice cream party at thier home...but unless I know that for sure, my five year old would not be there alone.

 

[princessmom29]

Because there are a lot of really strange people out there and you just never know. Look how many freaks are in the world and the amount of people who "trusted" their kids around them.

I don't know why your so hostile about it.

The point is how is it any differnt leaving a group of kids in the supervision of the birthday child's parents at Pump it Up versus at their home. The only difference would be that at Pump it Up there is one teenage party helper present. There will be lots of other children there, not only the op's child. I really don't think anyone who wanted to hurt a child would be doing it with that many potential witnesses right there.

 

[connorlevismom]

It's also perfectly okay to call the birthday boy's parents and quite honestly ask. Explain that DS is your oldest, you're new to the whole birthday party at home thing and don't want to presume either way that parents will be dropping kids off or staying for the duration. You can't go wrong with honesty.

If a parent called me with that kind of question, I'd be all over encouraging them to stay and be another set of hands! My oldest is turning 6 next month and all the parents around here are still in the "stay for the duration" mode so we usually have backyard BBQ type of parties to cater to both kids and adults.

That is a good idea, maybe I will just call and ask.

The point is how is it any differnt leaving a group of kids in the supervision of the birthday child's parents at Pump it Up versus at their home. The only difference would be that at Pump it Up there is one teenage party helper present. There will be lots of other children there, not only the op's child. I really don't think anyone who wanted to hurt a child would be doing it with that many potential witnesses right there.

Your pump it up must be very different from ours. Ours has a front desk staff, 3 workers in the arena's with the kids and then a worker in the party room that you have cake and food in. They also pretty much always have two parties going at once. I think that they are all run differently.

 

[StephMK]

It must be regional. I don't think parents usually stay around here. When DD was in 1st & we were new to the area, no parents stayed or seemed concerned about leaving kids at our house. After preschool, I don't usually stay at parties either.

I had actually never thought about leaving kids at a home party. My kids prefer to have home parties some years, even when we give them a choice.

 

[sk!mom]

Your pump it up must be very different from ours. Ours has a front desk staff, 3 workers in the arena's with the kids and then a worker in the party room that you have cake and food in. They also pretty much always have two parties going at once. I think that they are all run differently.

Yes, but all of that staff are strangers, correct? I have to agree with the opinion that if you've been dropping him at parties in a public place to be supervised by strangers and the birthday child's parents then I don't see this situation as any different.

I was always more nervous in a public place as you can never be sure who is around. I actually hated birthday parties at a pizza place or skating rink at this age since it tied up my afternoon. Home parties were great as it was contained enough to just drop off.