Need to vent, need advice

[lg3]

You are in a catch 22 situation. There is a price to pay for everything. When you take out a loan, there are conditions, when your parents help you, there are conditions. You have seen the price for your parents help. You also know the price of doing it on your own, with no help from them.
Only you can decide which is more worth it. I, personally, would rather do it on my own. So, I would be gearing towards complete independence. Whatever that takes.
Good luck to you, it is a tough position. But, OTOH, it is a fortunate position because you have what many people do not have and that is choices.

IA w/poohandwendy.
I have gotten up and moved to a city 600 miles away where I didn't know anyone - no job, no place to live, no friends. Just did it - very unlike me. It worked out fine for me, as I immediately found a temp job and a nearby apartment so I could walk to work. Made a lot of friends. It wasn't easy, but was the best thing for me at the time. You have an advantage as there may be a job opportunity with the company you work for. I would go for it. Good luck to you!

 

[KirstenB]

Dayecare isn't the 7th circle of hell you know. Plenty of kids go to daycare and turn out just fine.

You're 25- time to cut the apron strings and live your life away from mommy and daddy.

No, it isn't the 7th circle of hell. But starting a new job in a strange city, with a new daycare isn't my idea of fun either. When I was working, daycare for a baby ran $165 a week in the Richmond area. And that was 8 yrs ago. At the brokerage firm I worked for, salaries for a new hire would run about 24-28k which was decent money for someone without a 4 yr degree. A 2 br apartment would run about $600-800 a month.

I know I'm sounding like you should stay where you are. The reality is, you'll have so much more flexibility when your son is a little older. If he hasn't been in daycare yet, if he's anything like our older dd, he'll catch everything under the sun when he first starts. But, when he's older, he'll have a decent immunity.

Let me ask you something---could you still live in Colorado, and afford daycare yourself? Maybe that would be a decent solution. It would be SO helpful if your mom could be your backup daycare when your son is sick. Best of luck, I really feel for your situation.

 

[The Mystery Machine]

Well for starters living in CO isn't cheap, is it? Can you afford to live there?

It is your duty to get the deadbeat dad to pay for your son. He owes that to the child he fathered. Yes it will be a pain, but in the long run it will be worth it. Think long term here not too mention you are struggling.

As far as the grandparents, well, only you can decide what is best for your son. Yes, it might be a pain to you to walk in their shadow for awhile but think about looking back and what do you want to see?
If you think you are ready to cut the apron strings, then do it. Make the decision and the rest will follow.

As far as "relocation being paid for"...hahaha, don't bank on that on.