Need to vent about boss - WWYD

[disneyfanatic60]

Erased the original question and not because I did not get the answers I liked. It was a simple question. I do not feel "entitled." So far from reality. I think people just took things out of context and I feel flamed. I did "everything" I was suppose to and more to get the answer from my boss before now. I "cannot" force them to decide one way or the other. But I will not be flamed because I let it go this long and look like a total slacker!

 

[foolishmortal]

I know when I need the time off I ask for it ASAP not just 2 weeks before a big event you would have known about for a verrrry long time. Maybe thats his issue.

Like you said everyone knew you were helping plan etc, so along that line you should have known to let your work know you need time off and for how long more then 2 weeks ahead of time.

any place I have worked (third company in 18 years) we have to notify of week long vacations well in advance or risk getting shut out. either other people take, too soon of notice and they cant replace or grant time off due to needs of business etc...

 

[GRUMPY PIRATE]

quit?

it sounds like the owner and the other employees have different ideas.

did you really think that someone at work would ask you to take time off?

Some of the information is missing, such as, when you were hired, what was the companies leave policy?

are you allowed to take your two weeks all at once?

how far in advance would you have to schedule leave?

are you in a position that would require the company to hire a temp to replace you while you are gone? or would another staff member have to take over?

do you have an HR rep that you could talk with?

I know that I would sometimes schedule vacation four, five or more months in advance (especially if it was a Disney trip!)

 

[RadioNate]

I'm confused as to WHY you expected them to approach you about vacation time? Also why did you wait until 2 weeks before the wedding to discuss this?

I expect that you've known about the wedding plans for quite some time now. Why didn't you approach your boss about taking vacation time months ago?

It isn't the bosses responsibility to come to you about when you are taking time off, nor should they assume that you are taking time off when you haven't asked for it.

Most companies require far more than 2 weeks notice to approve vacation time.

Sorry.

 

[kwelch10377]

I'm confused as to why you thought they were going to approach you about you taking time off. If you needed the time off then you should have let them know as soon as you knew when you needed off.

I would suspect that some of the reason for the response you got is because you waited until 2 weeks before hand to let them know.

As for what to do next I would talk to the other owner and see what could be worked out.

 

[antmaril]

I, too, am wondering why you didn't ask way in advance (months ago) to take vacation the week of the wedding. I don't understand

 

[disneyfanatic60]

.....................

 

[HelenePA]

Dh asks for his weeks off asap. We know when we'll be at disney next year and I've already told him to put in for it.. he's been there 10+ years. He's got top seniority but there is no way I'd take the chance of them saying nope.. sorry others already put in for it.

I dont know how you should approach this since they already said no but maybe okay with out pay.. can you afford to take the week off with no pay? that might be your only option at this point

 

[The Mystery Machine]

Well, you should have pushed the issue.

We are not flaming you, it is just odd that you would not force the issue and tell them when you are taking off.

 

[mjkacmom]

My first thought was why in the world didn't you ask for the week off months ago? I didn't take the week of before my wedding, and I see no reason why your boss would think you were taking the week off before your ds's. Because if you were planning on it, you would've asked a while back.

DH has been with his company for 20 years, gets 7 weeks of vacation, and there is no way he could get a week off with only 2 weeks notice.

 

[kwelch10377]

You post never indicated that you spoke with them previously about this, just that you were waiting for to approach you. That being said it is still you responsibilty to follow up with them. I am sure you taking time off was not at the top of their mind and since you did not bring it up again they didn't think anything of it.

No one it doubting that you work hard for this company, so I am not sure why you are getting yourself all worked up with the responses and questions being asked by other posters.

You need to sit down with both owners and discuss the situation.

 

[ICF]

well.....

I am very surprised that they would get all worked up about things, and if you have two weeks vacation they wouldnt let you use at least part of it. I would think it would be pretty standard for the mother of the groom to take off at least a couple of days before the wedding. I think there being PITA's about it at this point.

However....I dont know that we can say exactly what you should do as we dont know if they have a reason for what they are saying. Are you especially busy right now...something major going at the office right before??

And...despite the fact that you might have talked to them about this wedding for the last year, you still should have gone to them a few months ago and said..."look, my son's getting married on X date. I have 2 weeks vacation and will need to use 3 days of that to take off Weds, Thurs and Friday before to get everything ready". It doesnt sound like this was ever done to that degree and now the stuff's hitting the fan over it.

Are they this difficult for everyone with using the vacation the workers have earned?

 

[GRUMPY PIRATE]

and sorry, but nobody is "flaming" you,

the questions are what would be asked in any normal employer/employee type of situation that you describe.

getting leave scheduled way in advanced is always the norm in most places, especially small businesses where one employee can be very important in the running of the business.

 

[Darsa]

If it had been me, I would have been a nag about it 'til I got an answer; I'm not a "wait and see" type person; I can't handle having no answer to an important question. I know, hindsight is 20/20, and "ya shoulda" isn't going to help at all. I'm very sorry you're having to deal with this crap on top of everything else.

I'm not sure there's much that you can do at this point; is there any option of speaking with the "other owner" and getting it resolved that way? It seems like that might be your only recourse.

 

[foolishmortal]

Well, you should have pushed the issue.

We are not flaming you, it is just odd that you would not force the issue and tell them when you are taking off.

^^^^^^

THIS!

I wasnt trying to flame either, more of a push issue util you got an answer and now all of a sudden y ouwant to push issue since you didnt get answeryo uwere hoping for.

 

[ksjayhawks]

Well, you should have pushed the issue. You can always call in sick. Sounds like they either want you to leave or fire you.

Me, too.

You are entitled to two weeks of vacation a year. Why have you not taken these already? You can see that they don't appreciate the fact that you have not taken vacation time.

Visit with the other owner immediately and tell him that you are taking your two weeks of vacation from x to y. (You can spread it out over three weeks if you want with a few workdays thrown in here and there if you feel you need that.) Tell him you notified them a year ago that you would need time off for the wedding and that you want to solidify the dates.

Good luck.

 

[happily single]

What I haven't seen addressed is the fact that the employer told her she isn't going to get paid for her vacation! If you have in your written job offer the fact you have two weeks paid vacation I would just take the time off you need. If you return to work and they fire you oh well. Write down a log of all conversations you had and with whom concerning your request for vacation, your exact conversation with the boss where he told you you wouldn't be paid, etc. THen contact your local Dept of Labor and file a complaint.

I agree that it initially appeared the op assumed the boss would ask her when she was taking vacation, but ultimiately they are refusing to be flexible at all.

 

[Disney Doll]

OK, you didn't post that you had had a conversaion with them....please reread your post. While you may know the whole story, we didn't, based on your initial post which left out the vital piece of information that you had discussed this already.

So, you have basically heard their side.

You have 2 choices:

1. Speak to your boss and see if you can get him/her to change his/her mind

2. Quit

Realisitically, what you have done for the company has no bearing on anything. You have been compensated for your work, and nothing pisses off a boss more than to hear "After all I've done for you". You didn't do it for free, and if what you were doing was not within your job desciprtionm, then you probably should not have done it if it was going to bother you.

Many years ago I was in a similar situation.

My uncle was retiring from the Army as a 2 star general, so a pretty big deal of a retirement ceremony. The retirement was in June. I knew about it the September prior....so about 9 months in advance...so I put in for vacation. My supervisor said to me "I don't know if I'll be able to give you that time off" I asked why, she replied "because other people may want that week". I responded that if they wanted that week, then they should put in for very early, like I was doing. She went on about how she might not be able to give it to me and I finally said "I will not be here that week. Whether or not I return to work the next week is entirely up to you". And yes, I was serious that I would quit if necessary....it was that important.

So, determine if you are willing to quit or not, and then go from there.

 

[ilovesugar]

I would not go to the other boss. That is just going to make the one you talked to angry and you don't want that. Think of how mad you get as a parent when your child goes to someone else and asks for something you already told them no to.

The conversation that you should have had in the beginning should have been "my son is getting married on X date and I will need these dates off". It seems like you had a minor conversation about needing time off but were not specific as to what dates you wanted. That was a mistake because you were not asking for time off, you were informing them that you were going to take "some" days off, just not which ones. I don't understand the waiting for them to approach you either. Where you thinking they were going to come and ask you which dates you needed off? I am not flaming, just genuinly asking a question. Most bosses are not going to do that, they don't really remember what is going on in your life.

 

[kimblebee]

See, this is why someone needs to quote the OP so us latecomers know what the heck is going on