Need Thanksgiving help fast! Family driving me crazy!LONG VENT!

[MinnieM3]

OK, I admit that I am an anal planner. SO I try to plan Thanksgiving early this year (a couple of week ago) and offer to have it at my house. (all family lives within 5 miles of each other and we actually don't see each other that much)

Older Brother #2 ---- we don't feel like coming to anyone's house.

Older Sister --- we'll host it but we only want to invite mom and dad and Gary and Billy (my 2 uncles who are unmarried). Then she says maybe she'll also invite older brother #1 and his wife. (Hmmm, I'm thinking, this just leaves out me and my family now.) I offer again to host. No real response.

So this past Friday I pour my heart out to mom and dad (they are both 85) saying that I don't understand my siblings and isn't Thanksgiving about everyone being together, enjoying the meal, etc. They sympathize.

We go off this weekend and I check in Sunday night with Dad. He still hasn't heard any *definite* Thanksgiving plans. SO I call Older Sister (remember this is like 9pm this past Sunday!!) and she says, that I can go ahead and have Thanksgiving. She'll bring green bean casserole. End of story.

SHEESH! OK, I can do it.

Call older brother #2.... wife answers and I extend an invite even though brother says he doesn't want to go anywhere. I tell them they are welcome to come for dinner or just dessert if they don't want to make a whole day out of it. She says thanks.

Call older brother #1..... wife answers. Says she's not sure what she'll bring. I tell her she can just bring whatever she'd like but I need to know so I can plan the menu (in only 3 days!!!) She says she'll call back.

Call DH's parents ----they are thrilled and will bring mashed potatoes.

Call uncles ----they are thrilled and will bring tea and a relish tray.

Call mom and dad --- dad says great, he'll make the turkey (he loves doing this) and his famous stuffing/gravy, etc.

SO last night I make out the grocery list. We're going to Columbia tonight right after school to the Trans Siberian Orchestra (2 hours away) and will get b ack after mmidnight tonight. That leaves Wed. to get ready. I'm still thinking I can do it.

THEN DH calls me at work and says my SIL (of older brother #1) still says she has no idea what she's bringing! (This drives me crazy....when is she going to decide! It's freaking TUESDAY afternoon!!)

THEN DH says he talked to my dad and he wants us to cook the turkey and stuffing, etc. And he has a 20 pound turkey he's starting thawing TODAY! Is this thing even going to be READY to cook Thursday?? So DH and I will be up at 5am stuffing this bird to have it ready by 1pm dinner. UGH!

I had asked DAd Sunday night that if he didn't want to cook the turkey to let me know thata night so we could buy one and start it thawing.

Now, I'll have to cook all my pies and casseroles all day Wednesday.

I HATE stuff like this. I don't like last minute changes. I don't like inconsiderate siblings. I needed to VENT here!

Thank you!
PS.... Please tell me how to cook a 20 pound turkey, stuffed.....and the best way to thaw it QUICKLY!

 

[MissBubbles]

Don't have much advise to give you - but as one anal planner to another, I definately sympathize with you.

Not sure how to thaw a bird quickly - I think Butterball has a 1-800 hotline to help you with questions, but I cook mine in a turkey bag, which cooks in 3-4 hours tops (around 20 pound bird).

Much luck to you - hope it all works out okay.

 

[MinnieM3]

can I buy a turkey bag at like Bi Lo or Piggly Wiggly??? Is it like a pot roast bag? My dad wants us to use his roaster...... I'm so clueless. I predict I will have an intimate relationship going shortly with someone from Butterball's turkey hotline.

 

[EthansMom]

I completely empathize! After hostessing both Thanksgiving and Christmas dinner last year for the in-laws, I am not doing Thanksgiving and will only do Christmas if I am feeling up to it (have minor surgery the week before) and then would have dinner on Christmas Eve so I can relax with my family on Christmas Day. (In fact, I may have most of Christmas Eve Dinner catered.)

Regarding the Turkey: Pull that sucker out of the refrigerator and put it in the sink. Plug the sink and cover the turkey with cold water. I would leave it that way pretty much all day long and then put it back in the refrigerator at night. Tomorrow morning, I'd put the Turkey back in the sink with cold water again.

We're doing Thanksgiving dinner at MILs. I ordered a pre-cooked meal and MIL just has to pick it up and heat it.

 

[CarolA]

Can't help you with this year?

But for next year, Send the invites and plan the entire meal yourself. Just assume they will bring nothing and figure that you will get about the same attendance as this year.

If folks bring stuff that's fine, but I think you will be less stressed if you just assume resposniblity.

Also, I saw good suggestinon this weekend on defrosting the turkey. Get a big clean bucket and put it in your BATHTUB. Fill the bucket with cold water. Put Turkey in the water. (put something heavy on him to keep him from floating) Check water often. As it gets warm dump the water into the tub and repeat! This keeps you from blocking up the entire sink and it's easier then using a bucket in the kitchen where you have to lift it up to empty it!

 

[CarolA]

Duplicate post!!!

 

[MinnieM3]

I will try to wrestle the turkey from my dad. He apparently "had" one at his house (it's probably like several years old as they keep everything forever in their freezer) and wants us to use it. He thinks he's doing us a favor by providing the turkey and I don't want to hurt his feelings. I asked him earlier about the water thing and he hasn't started doing it yet.......... Lord help me!! The other thing is I know it'll be some off brand cheap turkey. I hate that too.

Thanks for all the help so far!!

 

[minniecarousel]

The Cooking Bag is by Reynolds. You can cook it stuffed or unstuffed. It requires no basting - that's the best part. Ethan's Mom has the right info on thawing. I'm cooking one 20 lb turkey on Wednesday and another one on Thursday. We eat at 1-2 pm on Thanksgiving. Just a hint: just don't rely on that brother and SIL on bringing anything for the meal. If they call at the last minute letting you know what they'll bring and you already have it, well then you have plenty of it! I have a SIL who will offer to bring appetizers, put is chronically late - so what's the point of bringing appetizers? We are actually very lucky that we have Thanksgiving down to a science. Everybody brings the same dish every year - we eat at the same time - etc. I won't know what to do if someone else in the family hosts this meal!

 

[Nickimouse]

can I buy a turkey bag at like Bi Lo or Piggly Wiggly??? Is it like a pot roast bag? My dad wants us to use his roaster...... I'm so clueless. I predict I will have an intimate relationship going shortly with someone from Butterball's turkey hotline.

Yes you can buy these bags at Piggly Wiggly etc. They make bigger ones for Turkeys. They are the only way to go!

I so feel for you! I like things planned out and my inlaws have no problem winging it. Thanks goodness we are having Thanksgiving with my side this year!

 

[Pamlur]

The best way to thaw the turkey faster, I believe, is to throw it in a sink full of cold water. I've used smoked turkeys (which are precooked) for years, but I know I've seen that somewhere. Also, you would be far better off NOT to stuff the bird, but to cook the stuffing in a baking pan.

I always host T'giving, and I try to always have multiple backup plans in place. So far, so good.

(oops! I was slow in typing my response, so I'm repeating other people).

 

[MissBubbles]

Turkey bag is from Reynolds - they make roasting bags. Looks like a big clear plastic bag that comes with a tie - the ladies I work with swear by them, and a few years ago, for my first big dinner, I used them. After removing the giblet bag, wash & dry the bird. I put a cut up onion and a few stalks of celery in the cavity (for flavor and to flavor the gravy), put a few tablespoonfuls of flour in the bag (keeps the turkey from sticking too bad and helps with the gravy) and add the bird. Put in a roasting pan (or large cake pan), cut a few slits in the top of the bag and put in oven. Package with have time of cooking and oven temperature.

You'll be surprised how quickly they cook, are beautifully brown and are so moist & tender. Loads of juice to make gravy with...I'm really getting hungry now...

 

[bigmerle1966]

If the turkey has been there a couple years, I hope it doesn't have freezer burn. If not, and it is a off brand go online and find a recipe for an injectable marinade. Or mix sage with a stick of butter and smear it under the skin of the turkey. My sister makes a great turkey doing that, then she puts bacon over the top and then bastes it with a mixture of maple syrup and water. Oh so good.

 

[MinnieM3]

I must have this bag! I knekw you guyss would save the daya. When I was talking to DH I TOLD him, I have to go post this on the DIS and they will know what to do in a NY Minute!

I love being right!

 

[experiment626mom]

Be glad you have a family to share your Thanksgiving with.

 

[Pooh_Friend#1]

We just got this email at work about cooking Turkeys:

Fresh Turkeys - Allow 1 pound of turkey per person. Buy your turkey 1 to 2 days before you will cook it. Keep it stored in the refrigerator until you're ready to cook it.

Frozen Turkeys - Allow 1 pound of turkey per person. Keep frozen until you're ready to thaw it.
Turkeys can be kept frozen in the freezer indefinitely; however, cook within 1 year for best quality.

Thawing Your Turkey -There are three ways to thaw your turkey safely - in the refrigerator, in cold water, or in the microwave oven.

In the Refrigerator. Allow approximately 24 hours for every 4 to 5 pounds. 4 to 12 pounds 1 to 3 days. 12 to 16 pounds 3 to 4 days. 16 to 20 pounds 4 to 5 days. 20 to 24 pounds 5 to 6 days. Keep the turkey in its original wrapper. A thawed turkey can remain in the refrigerator for 1 to 2 days. If necessary, a turkey that has been properly thawed in the refrigerator may be refrozen.

In Cold Water - Allow approximately 30 minutes per pound. 4 to 12 pounds 2 to 6 hours.
12 to 16 pounds 6 to 8 hours. 16 to 20 pounds 8 to 10 hours. 20 to 24 pounds 10 to 12 hours Wrap your turkey securely, making sure the water is not able to leak through the wrapping. Submerge your wrapped turkey in cold tap water. Change the water every 30 minutes. Cook the turkey immediately after it is thawed. Do not refreeze.

In the Microwave Oven - Remove all outside wrapping. Cook your turkey immediately. Do not refreeze or refrigerate your turkey after thawing in the microwave oven.

REMINDER: Remove the giblets from the turkey cavities after thawing. Cook separately.

Roasting Your Turkey - Set your oven temperature no lower than 325 °F. Place your turkey or turkey breast on a rack in a shallow roasting pan. For more even cooking, it is recommended you cook your stuffing outside the bird in a casserole. Use a food thermometer to check the internal temperature of the stuffing. The center should reach 165 °F.

If you choose to stuff your turkey, the ingredients can be prepared ahead of time; however, keep wet and dry ingredients separate. Chill all of the wet ingredients (butter/margarine, cooked celery and onions, broth, etc.). Mix wet and dry ingredients just before filling the turkey cavities. Fill the cavities loosely. Cook the turkey immediately. Use a food thermometer to make sure the center of the stuffing reaches 165 °F.

A whole turkey should be cooked to 180 °F. To check for doneness, insert a food thermometer in the thickest part of the inner thigh without touching the bone.

A turkey breast should be cooked to 170 °F. Insert a food thermometer in the thickest part of the breast to check for doneness.

If your turkey has a "pop-up" temperature indicator, it is recommended that you also check the internal temperature of the turkey and center of the stuffing with a food thermometer - 165 °F for stuffing; 170 °F for breasts; 180 °F for whole turkeys.

For quality, let the turkey stand for 20 minutes before carving to allow juices to set. The turkey will carve more easily.

NOTE: It is safe to cook a turkey from the frozen state. The cooking time will take at least 50 percent longer than recommended for a fully thawed turkey. Remember to remove the giblet packages during the cooking time. Remove carefully with tongs or a fork.

If your roasting pan does not have a lid, you may place a tent of heavy-duty aluminum foil over the turkey for the first 1 to 1 ½ hours. This allows for maximum heat circulation, keeps the turkey moist, and reduces oven splatter. To prevent overbrowning, foil may also be placed over the turkey after it reaches the desired color.

REMEMBER! Always wash hands, utensils, the sink, and anything else that comes in contact with raw turkey and its juices with soap and water.

Storing Your Leftovers - Discard any turkey, stuffing, and gravy left out at room temperature longer than 2 hours; 1 hour in temperatures above 90 °F. Use refrigerated turkey and stuffing within 3 to 4 days. Use gravy within 1 to 2 days. If freezing leftovers, use within 2 to 6 months for best quality.

Source: www.fsis.usda.gov

 

[Chicago526]

If you have cable and get Food Network, watch a show called "Good Eats" hosted by Alton Brown. He has a 1 hour special that they've been airing at least once a day call "Romancing the Bird" (he has an odd sense of humor) that tells you THE way to cook a bird. (He recomends NOT stuffing, BTW).

If you don't have cable/don't get Food Network, get a friend who does to tape it!!!

If you insist on stuffing the bird, he also has a 1/2 hour show called "Stuff It" that shows how to do it, but it takes more time and is more involved, over all, then doing the stuffing seperate from the bird.

Another idea, if you just don't have enough time to thaw a bird (and you may not at this point) is to buy a bunch of turkey breasts and just make those. In that case, watch Rachael Ray's 1 hour special "Thanksgiving in 60" and she'll show you how to make T-Day dinner in one hour by cooking turkey breast instead of a whole bird.

GOOD LUCK!!!!

 

[MinnieM3]

What great info! I feel much better now! Thank you thank you thank you!!


And yes, experiment626 I am thankful to have family to celebrate with.... that's part of what this was all about. *I* seemed to be the only one in my family who *did* care about it!