Need some Laughs

[bubie2.5]

Who's the old guy with Tina Fey?

 

[Leoscrp27]

OMG, you guys are the best, I've been laughing so much reading your different posts. The encouragement was good too, Sometimes it's easy to forget that there are a whole lot of us who want change, and are willing to fight for it.
Thanks again. I'll be heading out to WDW just a few days after the election to either celebrate or nurse my wounds, but hopefully to celebrate.

 

[pyr8freak87]

well there was a nun and a priest one that i just remembered but seeing as i'm new around here to posting, I don't want to run the risk of collecting points already (maybe i'll experiment later )... so i'll give you something else. How about this:

Johnny was in science class. the professor was conducting an experiment to show the dangers of liquor. he had one glass of water and one glass of wine. so the professor starts the experiment and he sticks one worm in the water.. and its floating and looks happy. he sticks the other worm in the wine and it looks like it is struggling to breathe and then it sinks to the bottom and it is dead. so the professor asks" what was this suppose to teach you children" no one raises their hand to answer but then Johnny raises his hand and says "drink liquor and you wont get worms"

(See I always knew there was a reason for drinking!)

 

[ToddyLu]

Well I am a heterosexual that absolutely supports gay marriage, I live in MS so you know it's a tough neighborhood. Best wishes to each of you--thanks for making me laugh, too.

 

[SFBayDon]

The nun says, 'That's OK. My name is Kevin and I'm going to a Halloween party.'

Thanks Wally this made me lol, Don

 

[wallyb]

Thanks Wally this made me lol, Don

Kinda an everyday occurrence in SF?

 

[merryweather20]

Or even worse ...

http://www.palinaspresident.us/

The baby names poster isn't very accurate, according to recent interviews she said she would name her next child Zamboni.

http://ca.news.yahoo.com/s/capress/palin_intellectual

 

[rpmdfw]

According to a recent news report, a certain private school in Manchester was recently faced with a unique problem.

A number of 12-year-old girls were beginning to use lipstick and would put it on in the bathroom.

That was fine, but after they put on their lipstick, they would press their lips on the mirror, leaving dozens of little lip prints.

Every night the caretaker would remove them, and the next day the girls would put them back.

Finally, the headmaster decided something had to be done.

He called all the girls to the bathroom and met them there with the caretaker.

He explained that all these lip prints were causing a major problem for the caretaker, who had to clean the mirrors every night.

To demonstrate how difficult it had been to clean the mirror,
he asked the caretaker to show the girls how much effort was required.

The caretaker took out a long-handled squeegee dipped it in the toilet, and cleaned the mirror with it.

Since then, there have been no lip prints on the mirror.

 

[rpmdfw]

One day a florist goes to a barber for a haircut. After the cut he asked about his bill & the barber replies, "I cannot accept money from you. I'm doing community service this week."

The florist was pleased & left the shop.

When the barber goes to open his shop the next morning there is a 'thank you' card & a dozen roses waiting for him at his door.

Later, a cop comes in for a haircut, & when he tries to pay his bill, the barber again replies, "I cannot accept money from you. I'm doing community service this week."

The cop is happy & leaves the shop.

The next morning when the barber goes to open up there is a 'thank you' card & a dozen donuts waiting for him at his door.

Later that day, a college professor comes in for a haircut, & when he tries to pay his bill, the barber again replies, "I cannot accept money from you. I'm doing community service this week."

The professor is very happy & leaves the shop.

The next morning, when the barber opens his shop, there is a 'thank you' card & a dozen different books, such as 'How to Improve Your Business' & 'Becoming More Successful'.

Then, a Congressman comes in for a haircut, & when he goes to pay his bill the barber again replies, "I cannot accept money from you. I'm doing community service this week."

The Congressman is very happy & leaves the shop.

The next morning when the barber goes to open up, there are a dozen Congressmen lined up waiting for a free haircut.

And that, my friends, illustrates the fundamental difference between the citizens of our country & the members of our Congress!

Be sure to VOTE, but vote carefully!!!