Need some ideas/support

[KAMKIM]

I hate to be this honest but really need to be at this point - haven't told any one in "real" life my numbers because it just makes me sick. I'm 28 5'2 and 180lbs.

6 years ago I weighed 120lbs. I got pregnant with (second child) DD5 and put on 60 pounds during pregnancy. Didn't weigh 1 lb less when I left the hospital with her (how the hell is that possible when she was 8lbs I dont know) but anyways - 5 years later and I still weigh 180lbs. I immediately went on birth control after having her and have been on it ever since so I know that may be the reason I didn't take any weight off.

Here's the kicker - I used to be a size 6, now I am a 16 and cant wear jeans because of my stomach...I have yet to find a decent pair of jeans that look good on me.

I am just disgusted with myself. I hate how I look. I hate buying clothes. I hate seeing myself in the mirror. I sympathize with people that struggled with weight their entire lives because up until 5 years ago I never had a weight problem, and actually had a really nice body (at least I thought so) Now - I hate seeing myself in the mirror. I dont buy myself new clothes but I want to cry when I know I have to get size 16 pants and XXL shirts.

Well enough whining about it. Anyways, I am joining a gym next week with my step sister. We plan on going 3 times a week - cant really commit to more than that with working full time/kids/husband/dance/girl scouts - well you know the drill I'm sure.

But anyways I see people on here talking about how they've lost 20 or 30 lbs...I'm not too concerned with my actual numbers but if I could fit into a size 8 even and get a nice new pair of expensive jeans for myself... well I'd be

 

[lisah0711]

to you. You know that you are already headed in the right direction because you know the problem and are setting out steps to conquer it. There is a lot of good information on the WISH boards.

You are welcome to join us in the BL8 Fall Challenge. It just started last week. http://www.disboards.com/showthread.php?t=2280700 There are a lot of people who are in the same boat and there to help and support each other.

Good luck on your journey to good health!

 

[LAinSEA]

I want you to know that your story touched my heart...and I want to tell you that you are not alone in your frustration. Just by posting your determination to make a change, you have taken a huge step forward.

What I first want to ask is have you seen a doctor that specializes in metabolic problems? I'm in that process now; some are willing to go beyond the labwork and work with you based upon symtoms and others I've seen give you the response, "your labs are low, but in the normal range." There are all kinds of problems that keep you from being and maintaining a healthy weight.

I also want to recommend the the Jillian Michaels book "Master Your Metabolism." It's about all those hormonal problems, but written in plain language we all can understand with ideas to help fix what the doctors don't want to prescribe meds for.

My last piece of advice is to keep an accurate food journal of all you consume (if you sample while cooking, or eat the leftover quarter sandwiche from your kid's lunch, or have one or two french fries from a fast food meal--even though you didn't order it for yourself--those items add up, but you may not have realized that you have added a great many calories over and above carefully planned meals. Pick up a food count book and really explore what you are consuming--it may surprise you!

I don't quite believe, like some, that it is all about calories in, calories out (in excercise), because I have come to learn that it is the quality of the calories that count. (This after living on lean cuisines and diet soda--low calories--I was consuming less than 1,000 calories a day, but these foods actually helped me gain weight, not loose or maintain a healthy weight.) But explore different plans and find one that works for you.

And, please, take some time to recognize that you are a fabulous person and worth the effort to be healthy.

Laurie

 

[FireDancer]

The fact you are willing to take control of your own health is the first, and probably most important step you can make.

I agree with the PP that the best thing you can do is keep an accurate food journal. Not only does that make you read the label and know what you are consuming, but the biggest advantage in my opinion is knowing your portions. What we generally perceive to be a single serving is ofter 2 or more actual servings.

I have found that as you start concentrating on what you eat you will start to understand it more. At first most people concentrate on the number (calories, grams of fat/protein/carbs) but as you get more sophisticated you start to dig a little deeper and look at the types of carbs and sugars in foods. There is a lot of good information out there, not only here, but at your fingertips (or Google's fingertips). Is your husband also on board as far as the healthier eating goes? Not that what he does should hold you back but if you both decide to concentrate on what you eat you don't even have to have the bad options in the house. No matter how much you crave something if it isn't there you can't eat it.

I would also say that diet is only part of the puzzle, the other is physical activity. If you become more active you will not only lose weight through consuming less and better calories, but by expending them. As a PP pointed out, metabolism plays a role in weight loss. One of the often overlooked aspects of that, often time by women, is that a pound of muscle is more calorie intensive to maintain than a pound of fat. Instead of concentrating merely on weight I would also concentrate on building muscle. I'm not talking about curling your body wight but doing even body weight resistance training or taking a spinning class.

Good luck, remember that the only person who can determine your success is you.

 

[Tiger Lily 03]

In addition to the good advice offered, let me add that you can do this!

You have to decide to do this and make it a way of life. This is not something using just the "D" word.

Take small steps doing something each day.

 

[Northern_Julie]

Wow except for some of the details you expressed what I have been feeling in the for the last year. Can't remeber where it was but the first step is you go to face it to erase it. I am doing the biggest loser challenge here and it is helping me stay on track and think about what I am doing. I will PM some of my own details.

 

[KAMKIM]

Thanks so much for the responses, support and ideas! I guess I really should start taking a better look at what I eat. I dont eat breakfast and tend to snack while at my desk. I need to pay closer attention to that. It's hard because before my second daughter I ate what I wanted and never gained a pound. And well, I love junk food...

Since I am joining a gym I dont want to counter my efforts for a twinkie.

As far as DH being on board...well he does support me going to the gym - I really think it bothers him that I haven't lost weight since our youngest DD was born but he would never admit it. But he is 6'4 and about 190lbs - he plays basketball and football several times a week so weight is least of his worries.

I guess this is the first time I've been honest with myself. I dont recognize myself in pictures. The thought of seeing old friends terrifies me, because I've always been known to be the blonde with the "nice" body - and now...well they would be surprised.

 

[Mickeyorbust]

I know how you feel. A few years ago I was 190lbs. I actually hid from a former classmate in the grocery store because I didn't want her to see what I'd turned into. Now, 45lbs lighter, I'm the one waving to them in the stores.

Weight watchers was a good starting point for me. It gave me a good starter education on nutrition and food choices. But you need to find something that'll work for you. And exercise is a definite need to. At first for me, it was difficult to get motivated to exercise. But after a month or so I looked forward to it. I felt better and it was "me time" away from the house, kids, work, etc. Even if it's just a walk around the block.

You can do it!

 

[believe]

You can do this.

Look at is as a lifestyle change, not a diet.

I will say it will be easier for you if your husband is onboard. I have a junk food husband, doesn't care for veggies or fruit, and it is very difficult for me since I don't feel I have the right to remove the junk from the house. He does support me in exercise.

I am glad to see you don't want to counteract your exercise with a 'twinkie'. A recent article in Time magazine mentioned how individuals sometimes feel that exercise entitles them to have a treat, so the weightloss doesn't come. I also mentioned that for some exercise makes them more hungry, so you will want to watch that also.

I am 5'0". I was once your weight or higher, never got on the scale for a final reading I know it is possible for you. Take small steps, don't let others discourage you. Focus on being healthy, not so much the numbers.

 

[GSD4ME]

I agree with what all the PPs have said! I'm in the process of losing weight (AGAIN) myself (want to lose at least 60 pounds before we go to Disney next year!) and you definitely have to find a plan that works for you. For me, working out 5 days a week and watching what I eat (calories, fat, etc.) works well, but you need to come up with your own success plan/strategy. The one comment I would add, though, is that you HAVE to eat breakfast - it really is the most important meal of the day! It gets your body and your metabolism going for the day . . . just make sure that you're eating a HEALTHY breakfast and not some junky, surgary cereal.

You CAN do this!!!!