Need some encouragement

[carmel]

Before I get started, let me just say that I know there are A LOT worse things that some people have to worry about other than their toddler's behavior at DL. I am really grateful that I have the opportunity to go.

Having said that......We plan on being in DL the week after Easter. I know it is a busy time but due to school schedules, it was the only time we could go.

Hubby's family lives out in LA and his grandma's health is fading. She has never met our youngest so we have planned a vacation out there. To make it fun for the kids, we have incorporated 2-3 days in DL.

My 2.5 yr old is in the Volcanic Toddler Tantrums from Hell stage. She can be sweet as an angel one second then dissolves with rage, screaming, throwing herself on the ground and generally making a huge scene. While we are at home, we can move her to a safe place and ignore her until she is able to calm down. But when we are in public or have to be somewhere at a certain time, that is when the trouble starts. If she is having a tantrum on Main Street, we can't just walk away!

On one hand, I am looking so forward to going and on the other hand, I'm kinda dreading it. I know we are gonna have to go back to the hotel for naps and we have already resigned ourselves to a slow pace - if we don't see all there it, that is okay. We don't want to push the kids too hard.

I don't even really know what I am asking from you guys. Maybe just a note of support from any parent who has a toddler who throws tantrums to end all tantrums. It takes so much out of me to get through these 30 - 40 minute hysterical times. Plus, my 6yr old suffers in situations like this because, in order to keep the little one quiet, we have to devote our full attention to her.

Any suggestions on how to stop the tantrums before Easter? How to lessen them?

Thanks guys! I'm just kinda nervous about the 5 hr plane ride and 2-3 days in DL with Miss Nitroglycerin.

 

[Tink33]

I think every parent remembers those terrible twos. I hope that your DD will be having so much fun that she won't have time for a tantrum. If she does, don't let it ruin your vacation. Have one parent deal with the situation and have the other take your 6 year old to do something else - go on a ride, visit with Mickey, toss a penny in Snow White's wishing well. Your oldest should not be punished for the youngest's behavior. And the little one will realize that tantrums get you nothing.

 

[Tandyc]

Just wanted to add my support to your situation. The fact your aware it may be difficult shows what a great parent you are. My I suggest while your two-year old is making the scene you ignore it. Of course you must make sure she is safe and her needs are meet, but if she truly is just having a tantrum stay close with your attention on all the lovely details Disney offers.

Have a wonderful time and keep in mind this to shall pass

Good luck:

 

[got2travel]

Just know that yours will not be the only toddler having a tantrum. You will see others. Sounds like you already know not to give her the attention, just let it run its course.

 

[diberry]

My sympathies!!! My kids are in their 20s now but I'll never forget those dreadful tantrums and the way people look at you as if it's your fault!!! Don't let it spoil your time at DL - just deal with it like you always do and if people stare - smile sweetly!! As tandyc says - this phase will pass though it may be hard to believe at the moment!! Draw comfort from the fact that you can spend many years when she's grown up embarrassing her with stories like how she was SOOOO bad you had to ask advice before you could take her to DL!!!

 

[carmel]

Thanks for all of the suggestions. My girls were adopted- Hubby and I are caucasian and they are from China. I have a friend who took her daughter (from China) to an amusement park and when it was time to leave, her daughter threw a fit. They tried everything and finally decided to pick her up and just carry her out (while she was screaming and thrashing about).

Well, her husband and two other bio-children had gone out to the car to pick her up at the gate. As she approached the exit, security stopped her and detained her. They asked her to prove she was the mother of her child. They said they couldn't take her word for it because the child did not resemble her. The only proof she could come up with was a family picture her husband had in his wallet. So security escorted her to her car and her hubby had to show the guy his picture.

She said she had never been so scared in all of her life. In retrospect, she was thankful that security was that tight but she never goes anywhere without a copy of that family photo!

When my daughter is deep within her tantrum, you could ask her anything and she will yell 'NO' to you. I can just see security asking her if we are her parents and she yells 'NO' to them.


p.s. Telling her about this when she is 20? We were in Cozumel two weeks ago and she had one of her mammoth fits. I took my video camera and turned the screen around so she could see herself. I thought if she saw herself, she would stop throwing herself on the ground. Well, it didn't work but I have about 30 seconds of MAJOR tantrum footage that will come out at just the right time when she is an adult!

 

[missmulan]

here's another show of support for you! i've always said "two year olds do not listen". it does get better.....magically at three! you'll see.

 

[diberry]

Oh great idea carmel - threaten to show it to her boyfriends when she's a teenager - she'll do anything you ask!!!!!

 

[c&m]

I feel for you. Though my two DDs have never thrown those terrible two fits (they've always been reserved children), one is now heading into her tween years and gets moody and sulky. Yikes!

I had to chuckle tho, when I read that you get questioned whether you are the parent of your child. That sounds like me. I'm always mistaken as the nanny, even tho I'm my children's bio mother. They look nothing like me because I'm Asian and my DH is blonde, peaches and cream complexion with blue eyes. And my 2 DDs look like him, with their reddish/blonde/brown hair and peaches and cream complexion.

If it helps, there are some quiet corners at DL that we discovered (back in the days when I had to nurse my youngest, who needed to eat every 15 minutes, it seems) where you could have her time-outs. If you're interested, let me know.

Good luck!

 

[Boston Tea Party]

I know that with my son I must be careful to make sure that he eats regularly or his blood sugar will drop and he turns into a monster.

Also, I transition him into changing activities. For example, I will say, "Ten more minutes" and then a few minutes later say, "Five more minutes" and so on. (The timing doesn't have to be exact. He doesn't know. )

What about a special tradition before you leave the park for the day? Like maybe throwing a kiss towards Sleeping Beauty Castle?

Best of luck to you. You are not alone.

 

[LucyKate]

You won't be alone - we saw quite a few toddler tantrums while we were there - just makes all the other parents feel glad it's not them!

2 possible triggers - not keeping sugar levels up - if my 6YO hasn't eaten for a while that's what sets her off. As soon as she'd fed, she's an angel again.

2 long a day - make sure you duck out of the park for a while, if possible, for a break, or head somewhere for quiet time. That's the advanatge of staying on site or in a nearby hotel - there was an exodus of parents with young kids around lunch time, then a stampede as they all came back about 3 - naptime seemed a very good idea for the under 5s.