Need help from breastfeeding moms!

disneypolybride2008

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Jun 19, 2008
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Hi, my DD just turned 11 months and has been i guess weaning for about a week with a steady drop off the last two days. I don't understand why she (nature's instincts that is) would do this seeing as she doesn't seem to have a plan! She's otherwise happy and healthy. We just started her on foods last week since she was barely nursing (about 1/3 the amount). Since she's had baby cereal and 1st foods fruits, she is nursing even less! I got out the bottles that mimic breastfeeding.. she just chewed on it.. got out the sippy cup.. chewed on it and drooled, got mad at it and cried. Then we bought cute disney sippy cups that are small size so it would be easier for her to use, she seems to enjoy it (chewing on it) but only swallowed once. I tried water, juice, and breast milk. She sees it as a toy. I can see that it can take time and patience for her to figure it out, but she is barely nursing at all! I was able to pump a few times and get a total of 9 oz and it's already 1pm.. but used only 2 oz of it for her baby cereal for breakfast. Now she's napping after i got her to drink 15 swallows at 12.
Any advice for those in a similar situation?
 
No real advice, but my son did the same thing. Weaned himself at 11 months. I tried to continue his nursing, but he just wouldn't. He was a good eater, though, so we just did solids and I had a frozen stash of breastmilk that I used until he turned 1.
 
Has she ever used a bottle or had to suck something up? I ask this because as strange as it seems my DS did the same thing. We got the tumbler cup, nothing to prevent him from spilling the milk ALL OVER. And he used that under my supervision. It took him a couple of days to understand the whole thing. It was until 18mos before he could use a sippy cup or straw.

Another option: DS only wanted breast milk from cup COLD.

Another option: mix breast milk with cereal and start weaning to regular cow's milk
 

I think my daughter dropped to 2-3 feedings a day at that age. Ridiculous that I can't remember! But she continued with 2 a day til she was a little over 2. It could just be that the food is filling her up and she's not wanting it as much.

Not sure about the cup thing. Have you tried straw cups? We went to those before sippies since she already knew how to suck. They're actually supposed to be better for oral development.
 
My doctor told me that they start taking less milk/food around a year so that may be it, I would check with your doctor.

A tip I got for encouraging the straw was put a straw in a cup of water hold your finger over the end so it has a little bit of water, pull the straw out and hold over your daughters mouth really close, remove your finger so the water starts to flow in to her mouth. The natural instinct is to suck. Do this a few times then give her a cup with a straw and see if she takes to it.

I know it's not much help with the breastfeeding but maybe will help with her overall intake.
 
No real advice, but my son did the same thing. Weaned himself at 11 months. I tried to continue his nursing, but he just wouldn't. He was a good eater, though, so we just did solids and I had a frozen stash of breastmilk that I used until he turned 1.

i wish i had a stash of breastmilk! I've never been good at pumping and never needed to.. until now. Over the course of the day i pumped about 10 oz. She consumed all but 2 oz. She nursed decent 1x the whole day! -20 swallows, about 2 oz i would guess
 
Could she be teething and the sucking is causing her pain?

she's not drooling or acting any differently, but i've noticed lately there are bulges where her eye teeth are on each side and when i put my finger there she clenches down as hard as she can. i can feel it is firm and bluging looking. no redness and no white under the gum, so they are just emerging i think. other than those spots her gums all look normal. she has no teeth anywhere yet. HOWEVER, i was just thinking last night that is a likely cause, because she changed her latch to be tight lipped on the top, normal on the bottom (flanged), and she doesn't gulp fast anymore.. she barely moves her jaw, gets let down, then seems to use as minimal effort as possible, pooling the milk and then swallowing.. which makes sense if she's in discomfort. About when all of this started, DD4 had her easter egg out and left it half open. well the baby got it and was chewing on it for a second before i grabbed it away.. and right away i thought, oh man, that has a sharp edge to it! Maybe she hurt her tongue or gum? She doesn't behave as if something hurts.. wasn't extra cranky through out all of this week. I will just keep offering. During the night she would nurse better than during the day, some feedings are 0-4 swallows, others 20, night before last was 30-40 twice during the night. Last night was 20 during the night, once. If it was injury related, i'd think it would be improving, and it's not.
 
Has she ever used a bottle or had to suck something up? I ask this because as strange as it seems my DS did the same thing. We got the tumbler cup, nothing to prevent him from spilling the milk ALL OVER. And he used that under my supervision. It took him a couple of days to understand the whole thing. It was until 18mos before he could use a sippy cup or straw.

Another option: DS only wanted breast milk from cup COLD.

Another option: mix breast milk with cereal and start weaning to regular cow's milk

She never had anything other than the breast. I introduced the sippy cup yesterday, it's a 5 oz size. I put 2 oz of breastmilk in it today, dipped the top in milk, and over the course of the whole day i offered it to her many times and she nearly finished it. I used the pumped milk i got today for her cereal, 2oz 3x today. (just hope i'm not giving her too much cereal.. tomorrow i'll measure it)
Some feeding i offer her the breast and she'll lay with me in position, and then barely suckle, but she 'hangs out' and other times she's too busy to stay.
 
I think my daughter dropped to 2-3 feedings a day at that age. Ridiculous that I can't remember! But she continued with 2 a day til she was a little over 2. It could just be that the food is filling her up and she's not wanting it as much.

Not sure about the cup thing. Have you tried straw cups? We went to those before sippies since she already knew how to suck. They're actually supposed to be better for oral development.

We have a bunch of straw cups. I thought about it, but i figured the flow would be too much. I can try it if the sippy doesn't work. Not sure how to clean the straws well. What i did for my first, she still uses these daily, is i took out the plastic straw and replaced it with a real straw. It spills a little, but she's 4 so she's good with it. Less sucking, i agree it would be better for oral development.. maybe i should give that a try. Atleast we have a bunch. She may be excited to use the same cup she sees DD4 with.

When your DD dropped to 2 feedings a day... was that breastmilk? Did you pump in between her two feeds? Did she use both breasts at each feed? When i read about sample schedules, it's like feed at 7, then at 11, then 1, etc.. but what about when baby only uses one breast at a feeding.. then it's 6 hours that a breast goes between feeding.. isn't that too long? that's 2x a day if the baby sleeps all night.

I offer her milk, as i have from birth, hourly. she has always taken it, drank about 20-40 swallows, and slept amazingly since birth. Now that she's going through this, i am trying to lengthen the time between feedings but then when she barely nurses on one side, i dont want to wait 2 hours to use the other, then another 2 before the side that was barely used gets nursed again. sigh.
 
We have a bunch of straw cups. I thought about it, but i figured the flow would be too much. I can try it if the sippy doesn't work. Not sure how to clean the straws well. What i did for my first, she still uses these daily, is i took out the plastic straw and replaced it with a real straw. It spills a little, but she's 4 so she's good with it. Less sucking, i agree it would be better for oral development.. maybe i should give that a try. Atleast we have a bunch. She may be excited to use the same cup she sees DD4 with.

When your DD dropped to 2 feedings a day... was that breastmilk? Did you pump in between her two feeds? Did she use both breasts at each feed? When i read about sample schedules, it's like feed at 7, then at 11, then 1, etc.. but what about when baby only uses one breast at a feeding.. then it's 6 hours that a breast goes between feeding.. isn't that too long? that's 2x a day if the baby sleeps all night.

I offer her milk, as i have from birth, hourly. she has always taken it, drank about 20-40 swallows, and slept amazingly since birth. Now that she's going through this, i am trying to lengthen the time between feedings but then when she barely nurses on one side, i dont want to wait 2 hours to use the other, then another 2 before the side that was barely used gets nursed again. sigh.

I never pumped to keep my supply up. I never had luck with pumping, so I only did it if I was out or working. So no pumping in between feeds. By the time she was 1, we had already dropped the overnight feeding 6 months earlier. I really only nursed on demand for the first 3 or so months, and then I got her into a "wake, feed, play, sleep" schedule. At 1, she would BF first thing in the morning and right after each nap. Then at about 1.5, she dropped the first nap and that 3rd feeding. At both of the feedings, I'd give her both sides. 2 hours between feedings at 1 really isn't that much, so I'm not surprised she's not nursing much now that she's eating food. As they start to wean, your body will adjust and eventually make less. It could be painful, but I wouldn't pump in between-it could just fool your body into thinking you still need that much milk.
 
She never had anything other than the breast. I introduced the sippy cup yesterday, it's a 5 oz size. I put 2 oz of breastmilk in it today, dipped the top in milk, and over the course of the whole day i offered it to her many times and she nearly finished it. I used the pumped milk i got today for her cereal, 2oz 3x today. (just hope i'm not giving her too much cereal.. tomorrow i'll measure it)
Some feeding i offer her the breast and she'll lay with me in position, and then barely suckle, but she 'hangs out' and other times she's too busy to stay.

Poor mama! Some kids just don't deal well with the transition. DS wanted nothing to do with a bottle when I went back to work - we tried just about every brand known to man & some sippy cups. No dice. DH had to syringe feed him a few drops at a time. After a while, DS finally accepted the Mimijumi bottle (it looks just like a boob). But for other moms it seems another brand would be their magic one that worked.

At 11 months you have lots of options tho. Various solids or purees. And pretty soon you can introduce whole milk. See what pediatrician recommends.

I wouldn't worry about watching the clock- just see what your comfort level is. If your breasts feel tight, pump. If you are still comfortable, then don't worry about it. If you want more specific coaching on the weaning process, you could look up La Leche League. They probably have a chapter that meets near you, and the meetings are free.

Good luck!

ETA: you can try experimenting with different flow levels also DS never liked slow flow, even at 4 months old - he only wanted fast flow.
Also check out Kellymom website. Great info on there.
 
What is self-weaning?
A baby who is weaning on his own:

  • is typically well over a year old (more commonly over 2 years)
  • is at the point where he gets most of his nutrition from solids
  • drinks well from a cup
  • cuts down on nursing gradually

so DD 11 months has NONE of these. I think her mouth must hurt, along with distractions. I'm going to look for a nursing necklace. -as it suggests
thanks for the article!
 
And remember that she is getting a lot more from you than you are when you're pumping! Best thing to do is just keep offering (assuming that you want her to keep nursing until she self weans).

Also agree with the straw cups. It's all my exclusively BF son would ever use. I got the ones with a kind of rubbery straw and just put them in the dishwasher.
 
I'd consider having her seen by your doc/care provider if she doesn't pick up. Sometimes not eating much can be a sign of something else, like a UTI, which may not have a lot of other symptoms. It doesn't sound like she is taking in enough fluids. I also think it could be the teething. At her age you don't need to stick with first foods. At 11 months she can have more than cereal and jarred pureed foods. Also, try giving her a washcloth or something that was wet and then frozen (soft, not hard) and see if that helps her mouth? You can also feed her liquids (breastmilk) from a spoon. She might take that easier than a sippy cup or straw if her mouth is tender. Good luck mama!
 
And remember that she is getting a lot more from you than you are when you're pumping! Best thing to do is just keep offering (assuming that you want her to keep nursing until she self weans).

Also agree with the straw cups. It's all my exclusively BF son would ever use. I got the ones with a kind of rubbery straw and just put them in the dishwasher.

This is sooo important. Pumping is NOT indicative of how much your baby is actually getting. Pumps are a lot less efficient than your baby is.

Honestly, I'm a little old school in that I'd try to give her a small dose of pain relief (tylenol or motrin) to see if that helped her at all.

Lastly, your milk will adjust to her needs. She's almost a year old and should be able to go longer than an hour without nursing. I had overactive let down and only ever nursed on one side per feeding. I had no supply problems. My middle dd self weaned at just about 2 and my youngest dd had to be forcibly weaned at 2.5 for lots of reasons that I can get in to but won't for now to be brief. Your breasts will adjust to only nursing on one breast per session and, additionally, nursing as long as she can on one breast would be better to allow her to get hind milk since she's nursing for such a short time.
 
Glad to hear you little one is getting back to normal. Both of my boys, 3.5 yrs and 14 months, went through periods where they wanted nothing to do with nursing for a few days and times when they wanted to nurse non-stop. I stressed with my first and am able to be a bit more relaxed with my second. It seemed like nursing changes corresponded with a mental leap/new skill.

Both of my boys liked a soft straw cup better than a traditional sippy. Neither was excited by whole milk either. My youngest will only have a few sips from his brother's cup.

If her mouth is moist, the soft spot is not sunken in and her wet diaper output is normal you shouldn't worry too much about dehydration. But never hesitate to call your pediatrician's office and talk to a nurse.
 
Glad to hear you little one is getting back to normal. Both of my boys, 3.5 yrs and 14 months, went through periods where they wanted nothing to do with nursing for a few days and times when they wanted to nurse non-stop. I stressed with my first and am able to be a bit more relaxed with my second. It seemed like nursing changes corresponded with a mental leap/new skill.

Both of my boys liked a soft straw cup better than a traditional sippy. Neither was excited by whole milk either. My youngest will only have a few sips from his brother's cup.

If her mouth is moist, the soft spot is not sunken in and her wet diaper output is normal you shouldn't worry too much about dehydration. But never hesitate to call your pediatrician's office and talk to a nurse.

She pooped 3x today. She wet a good amount, but lower than normal. She drank 1.5 oz all day from her sippy cup. I gave her the soft straw cup which is just like her big sisters. They each had one at the time of the baby's introduction, she chewed on it.. drooled a ton, and did not suck. She seemed to like it. Then i went to the fridge and got the sippy cup, she swallowed a few times and then swatted it away. Overall today she nursed decent until 1pm, so then i gave her baby cereal with pumped breastmilk throughout the rest of the day, and some sweet potatoes. I keep thinking maybe it's my supply that is low, but then she barely sucks.. more like just hanging out, and when i let down she barely sucks and drinks. Right before she started all this, i remember she woke up in the morning and had her milk, swallowing a record 90 times. Since that big feed days ago, she rarely gets to 30. She is otherwise fine and happy, so that's relieving. I was so worried with my first daughter, and much more relaxed with my second too... until now! I just worry about her not getting the breastmilk because it is so good for her, especially with all it's antibodies. Like tonight, DH is having daddy time and then goes, she smells like poop... yup, she pooped and has been sitting in it for awhile. I had changed her before i fed her, then fed her, let her go play, then he picked her up afterwards, sat with her at the table, then noticed it. When i changed her it looked like it was there for awhile.. made a mess of herself, i cleaned her well and bathed her afterwards.. so yes i keep telling her she's a baby and needs her mommy milk for the antibodies!
 


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