Need gift suggestions for friend in bad situation (long)

[scrapquitler]

I have a longtime friend from high school who is in a bad situation. She is somewhat disabled and recently was injured so she is on crutches and not really mobile (well she is, but with great difficulty). She and her husband are possibly borderline retarded and with possible psychiatric. As a result, they have difficulty finding and keeping jobs. Her husband had a job driving his car with a 'wide load' sign accompanying big trucks, and they were doing okay. A few months ago, his car broke down and as a result he lost his job. They were paycheck to paycheck and have little family support. As a result, they were evicted from their apartment and they are currently living in a homeless shelter.

Several of us who are friends with her from elementary/high school have been helping them, getting them to appointments, signing them up for services (food stamps, medicaid, etc) and advocating for them as much as possible and doing what we can to provide some emotional support. Between the homeless shelter and us, they have the basics they need for the moment, but we are working on long term things as well (one tiny step at a time). No luck with jobs yet .

I've been thinking that I want to do something nice for her for Christmas, probably in the $75-$100 range. They have no transportation, they are in the downtown of a non-so nice city, she has a hard time getting around. I don't want to do something TOO nice because frankly I'm concerned about security at the shelter (I'd hate to get her something and have it stolen).
I am working on making a quilt for her, and she asked for a doll or a teddy bear, which I will get. She also asked for Stamps and scrapbooking supplies, which I have for her, but I want to keep those separate from 'Christmas'.

A group of us are planning to take her out to lunch sometime close to the holidays.

Any other suggestions??? I hate that they always seem to be falling thru the cracks...they are trying very hard and are trying to do everything right, but nothing ever seems to go right for them.

 

[cglaura]

Would something like a homemade coupon book be appropriate? Something that would hold no value to someone else. With coupons such as "Good for one night out at the movies." or "Good for dinner at your [favorite restaurant]."

You seem to know them well, so you could insert their favorites into the coupons.

for all you do, you seem like a very kind-hearted person.

 

[disneygirl 17]

I hate to hear this - sorry I know that is tough.

I really don't have any gift suggestions but have you heard of the wish program. http://www.wishprogram.org/ - you may have to have a job for this program I am not sure.

Can they get diability?

 

[blondietink]

If they lack transportation could you pre-pay some bus rides or pre-pay with a taxi company? You and other friends might not always be available to take them places. I would also suggest looking into services with various non-profit agencies that work specifically with the mentally disabled. They sometimes have grants available to fund such things as furniture, etc. once they find a place to live. They also have supported work programs that provide training in job skills. Also the Salvation Army is very good about helping those in need.

You are a true angel helping our your firend!

 

[leight]

First, thank you for helping them- you are wonderful!

Do they qualify as disabled in anyway- iq or psych? If they do, there should be vocational assistance that they would be eligible for to help get additional training and job placement. I'm assuming that if you have helped getting them food stamps that the medicare/medicaid apps were filled out then too. If they begin with either a program for adults with mental disabilities or psychiatric conditions- they can probably get access to social workers and case manager to really help them transition. Have they applied for section 8 housing? I'm sure it is a long wait but they should be on the waiting list.

Again, thank you for helping!

 

[Bren's Mom]

For sure they would love to be invited for Thanksgiving and/or Christmas to your home or to the home of one of the other friends. A holiday in a homeless shelter is so sad.

Perhaps a nice outfit for interviewing with and then for wearing to work after she gets a job? You could store it at your home if needed.

Gift certificate to the movies for her and dh, might be nice to 'get away' for an afternoon and forget about their troubles.

 

[Whistle]

How about something that would keep them warm? A new coat? Gloves, scarf, etc? The other thing that came to mind is something that woud make her feel good or "feminine". This might differ from person to person, but I would think of some nice shower gel or lotion, perfume, etc.

I think you are doing a GREAT thing!