need christmas help...

[tiggger1]

I need to advice, I would like to have Christmas at my house this year. I am sick of packing up the kids to go to my moms and my mil and someone complaining that the kids are too tired to open their gifts..It wouldnt be a big deal for my sister and her kids because they go to her MIL on xmas eve.. The rest are adults...
my issue is dealing with the gifts.. My family does xmas different than my inlaws...my family goes way overboard...but its kinda nice because its stuff we need ( alot of clothes, plus a some toys). My MIL is very generous also but more low-key.. a few small toys, pajamas and 1 or 2 big gifts.. Hubby and I usually get gift cards or a check...

Unfortunately my mil feels uncomfortable because my parents give us more to open..is there anyway to make this work.. I am hoping to convince my parents to cut down on the gifts and give hubby and I one item together, a popcorn machine from Sam's club...

any ideas on how to manage this?

 

[Erin1700]

We had the same problem. We invite inlaws over earlier and do snacks and gifts with them. They stay for dinner. My parents come right at dinner time. So we all eat together and have dessert together. By then the inlaws are heading out and my family stays and we do presents with just them. Works for us.

 

[tiggger1]

thanks!

we have huge family...It could be as many are 16 adults, 2 teens, and 6 kids...but chances are either my dad or my sister husband is working..and if my husband cousin does come to visit, then his aunt and family would probably just stay home ( his cousin has twins, they will be 18 months..they don't do change well) so it will probably only be 11-12 plus the 4 kids...but at least we wont have to go anywhere!

 

[golfgal]

We get together with DH's family the Saturday before Christmas. We do the gift stuff with them then-14 adults, 13 kids ages 2-16. We do this at our house since we have the best space for everyone. It works out great because then everyone is free to have their own family thing on Christmas or visit the other side of the family then. This started with our oldest was 3 and we were sick of dragging the kids all over creation for Christmas. We told everyone that we were staying home for Christmas, they were welcome to join us but we were no longer going anywhere. Everyone else was relieved because they were starting to have kids and it was getting to be an issue. It has worked out great.

My family was a 'it's on Christmas or nothing" deal so we just continued to offer an invite to our house and no one took us up on it. Their loss. The past couple years we have gotten together with my Dad and Step-mom on Christmas. They came to our house 2 years ago, we went to their place last year. They are planning on coming here this year because it is just easier for the two of them to travel then the 5 of us, plus the dog.

 

[shortbun]

We had the same problem. We invite inlaws over earlier and do snacks and gifts with them. They stay for dinner. My parents come right at dinner time. So we all eat together and have dessert together. By then the inlaws are heading out and my family stays and we do presents with just them. Works for us.

This is the way I do it too but MIL is the big present buyer. Her stuff is opened and out of the way for a smaller gift exchange with the rest of the family that seems as big because several people participate. The in-laws stay for all of it because they travel far and want quality time. That's how I get them here early -'quality time.'

 

[GeorgeG]

I came to dread Christmas because of all the family pressures. My family has always been relatively small and enjoyed a moderate Christmas that didn't exhaust everyone. My wife's family is huge and there was always an insistance on who was going to host Christmas Eve, then Christmas morning, and then Christmas dinner. There were always nice gifts, but mostly for the children. Unfortunately, by the time we sat down to dinner everyone just wanted to get it all over with. There should not be a competition over who gives more or is the better host. If somebody must compete, let them knock themselves out and shrug it off. They are more concerned with impressing themselves.

Moving to Florida was the best thing for me. We do not go north for any holiday, especially during the cold months, and anyone who wants to come here is welcome as long as they understand we keep it low-key. My house, my rules!

 

[Desnik]

I find that with so many people and so many presents being opened at the same time, no one notices who brought what! We have Christmas at our house every year with 25-30 people. It is crazy here during present opening.

 

[The Mystery Machine]

Split it up. We do my family's Christmas Eve, with all the big stuff.
DH's is Christmas Day.

Or vary the time that the IL's/your family comes. Just work it out. You might have to "tweak" it a bit until it gets better.

 

[AlexTina]

We have a small party on Christmas eve and all the family members come, and bring their gifts with them. They then all come back Christmas afternoon for Christmas dinner. All the gifts are opened in the morning before anyone gets to the house and therefore no one really knows who gave what and so there's no reason for anyone to feel self conscious.

Tina

 

[Terry36]

Nice ideas....we always travel too and I would love to stay home on Christmas.

 

[creativeamanda]

You can do it Christmas eve and open only one present, leaving the rest for Christmas day. That's what we do.