"My wife beats me...."

[stinkerbelle]

well...that's the story DH is going to tell his coworkers today anyway...



Last night around 11pm...I'm laying in bed, lights off, DH is futzing down the hall on the computer. Hall light is on. He shuts the PC down, takes the dog out to do her business, she runs right back upstairs to our bedroom to wait for her "good night cookie". DH shuts all the lights off in the house and walks up the stairs.

He's moving pretty fast so I assume he can see in the dark ok.

He walks into the bedroom...goes to his nightstand (opposite side of the room), drops off his watch/pager/bracelet, and walks back across the room to the door to the bathroom.

Mind you...the dog is still waiting for her good night cookie.

DH trips over the dog and takes a face plant into the door. I jump out of bed, turn on the light, and make sure he's okay.

He says he's fine, doesn't want an ice pack...and continues to get ready for bed.

He goes into the closet to take off his jeans/sweatshirt and checks out the mirror in there...

"My wife beats me..." he keeps saying...heheh

I go into the closet and see the biggest bump ever on his head.

This morning...bump still there...poor guy.

(I know some people won't find this humourus...but it's all in good fun...and if he wants to tell his coworkers I beat him...fine...whatever...all in good fun)

 

[Ava83]

We have to keep our boys in line somehow

DH and I will draw X's on various body parts and pretend we are "spanking" (dirty), and its all in good fun also, so I find no weirdness in that at all

Now your puppy, she's strange (kidding)

 

[Hercules10]

I have two large dogs who love to play early in the morning before I go for my work-out. I'm talking rough housing with a 95lb and 80lb bundle of fur, claws and teeth.

Needless to say I end up with neat 4-line scratches on my chest and occasionally the back. Take a guess what the guys in the locker room theorize.....?

 

[BeNJeNWaFFLe]

I have asthma and because of my steriod inhalers I bruise easily. In college my roommates used to ask DBF if he beat me because of all the bruises on my legs. And since I had no idea where the bruises came from, I figured that theory was better than "I dont know". It was all in good fun.

 

[CapeCodTenor]

Mind you...the dog is still waiting for her good night cookie.

Your dog gets a good night cookie? Wow, nice for the dog. I think my dog would be floating on if she got one right before bed. Sorry to hear about you DH. I'm sure he'll milk it at work.

 

[stinkerbelle]

Your dog gets a good night cookie? Wow, nice for the dog. I think my dog would be floating on if she got one right before bed.

yes, we have a fatty dog
she gets a cookie when she does her business outside (no business, no cookie) (it's actually half or 1/3 of a regular sized 'treat')

and since she goes outside right before we go to bed, she doesn't get her treat "downstairs" in the kitchen...but upstairs in the bedroom.

and she'll drool all over the floor if you make her wait too long.

(she gets her peanut butter filled kong from the freezer every night at 9. yes, she's VERY spoiled)

 

[CapeCodTenor]

yes, we have a fatty dog
she gets a cookie when she does her business outside (no business, no cookie) (it's actually half or 1/3 of a regular sized 'treat')

and since she goes outside right before we go to bed, she doesn't get her treat "downstairs" in the kitchen...but upstairs in the bedroom.

and she'll drool all over the floor if you make her wait too long.

(she gets her peanut butter filled kong from the freezer every night at 9. yes, she's VERY spoiled)

Is it an actual cookie? We give our dog a 1/2 a treat when she does her business outside too, but it's a milk bone.

 

[stinkerbelle]

Is it an actual cookie? We give our dog a 1/2 a treat when she does her business outside too, but it's a milk bone.

umm...it's a nutro biscuit...(we call them cookies. heheh)...about 4 inches long I think? (if we buy milkbones...we buy the small 1" ones...and she'll get a full one of those.)

 

[WonderfulDreamer2]

Our dogs get treats for going potty too. They will follow us around the house and nudge you with their nose if you forget to give it to them. We use "Carry Outs" which are soft chewy treats. They loooovvveee them. We switched to biscuts once and both picked it up and immediately dropped it to the floor as if saying "Hey, whats up? This isn't our treat!". Too cute

 

[Microcell]

You may beat your DH, but mine gets into fights with cars and wins!!!

Dh slipped and fell in the one snow we had here this winter. He used the car to break his fall and broke his hand, but he had the last laugh. The car died that day (engine blew the timing chain and bent the valves).

So for the next month showing his cast all over, he could rightfully say "You should see the other guy".

 

[CapeCodTenor]

umm...it's a nutro biscuit...(we call them cookies. heheh)...about 4 inches long I think? (if we buy milkbones...we buy the small 1" ones...and she'll get a full one of those.)

Oh, ok. I thought you were giving her actual cookies. I thought, "wow, spoiled dog." Of course, my dog is also spoiled. She gets more loving than any dog I know. She's so spoiled that she'll come up to you and place her head in your lap, and by looking in those eyes she's saying, "Ok, now pet me." And talk about toys. This dog has a ton of toys that she loves to play with. Although, one toy is banned, and must stay in the basement. It's a doggie soccer ball that has a squeeky thing in it.

 

[Hercules10]

Of course, my dog is also spoiled. She gets more loving than any dog I know.

Mine too. They don't get 'doggie treats'...nooooooo. I actually get them beef sticks as a treat. And toys. Great googly-oogly!!! I go to Goodwill and pick up a bag of stuffed animals for them to 'gut'. Cut off the eyes (choking hazard) and then let 'em have at it. They find the seam, pop it and then stuffing is everywhere!

 

[CapeCodTenor]

Mine too. They don't get 'doggie treats'...nooooooo. I actually get them beef sticks as a treat. And toys. Great googly-oogly!!! I go to Goodwill and pick up a bag of stuffed animals for them to 'gut'. Cut off the eyes (choking hazard) and then let 'em have at it. They find the seam, pop it and then stuffing is everywhere!

I'd love to see your house after they get ahold of one of those toys.

 

[Hercules10]

I'd love to see your house after they get ahold of one of those toys.

I'm always amazed at how much stuffing one of those things holds. But a busy puppy is a good puppy!

 

[CapeCodTenor]

I'm always amazed at how much stuffing one of those things holds. But a busy puppy is a good puppy!

My dog got a hold of a stuffed animal once...cought it before it became completely unstuffed, but man that was a lot of suffing.

ETA: Yes, a busy puppy is a good puppy.

 

[Shugardrawers]

Ah yes, Petey has been known to disembowel a number of goodwill stuffed toys. He gets a cookie too when he goes out to do his business and has been known to fake having to potty just to get one sometimes so often I thought he had a bladder infection I've gotten smarter though. Now he must pee a reasonable amount or no treat.

Dh once told the guys at work I beat him up. He had been working under the car when something hit him in the face. He had a HUGE bruise on his cheek. Funny how they think they are such big tough guys until they get hurt then they blame it on US!!

 

[stinkerbelle]

They find the seam, pop it and then stuffing is everywhere!

so how many "shells" do you have around teh house?
heheh

we have shells of Shrek, Eeyore, a pink pig (see below), a squirrell....

pink pig before:

pink pig after about 10 minutes:

(dunno how this started off as a "dh blaming me for something" and changed into "spoiled doggers...heheh)

 

[CapeCodTenor]

(dunno how this started off as a "dh blaming me for something" and changed into "spoiled doggers...heheh)

Life has a funny way of evolving sometimes.

 

[kejoda]

Oh let hubby whine all he wants to at work, just don't let him whine at home.


So how about some more pics of that cute dog? hint, hint nudge, nudge

 

[stinkerbelle]

So how about some more pics of that cute dog? hint, hint nudge, nudge

seriously? ok - love to show off Jazzy!

"I...can't....breath..."

and doing what she does best...snoozing...