My vacation is going great...

[kaytieeldr]

And for the record.. no one is very good at listening to "please ignore".

For the record, when you post on a public forum you WILL get readers and responses. If you don't want comments, you should 'vent' in an e-mail and send it to yourself.

 

[kaytieeldr]

I lived with both of them throughout my life and I saw work as spending 80hrs a week at the office, killing yourself for no reason.

Not everybody who works does 80 hours. As a matter of fact most do not. Does Kari work 80 hours to support you and her?

As a matter of fact, I seem to recall some posts from the OP, maybe last fall? Where she was complaining because Kari was working sooo many hours - well over sixty, iirc - and always exhausted. Sometimes she was working double shifts, sometimes she had no days off.

 

[december]

OP, how can you stand your SO working that many hours while you sit at home? I'm going to back away from this thread after this, but this is just sitting wrong with me. All I ever wanted to do was marry dh and have kids. Now we have 3, and we both work to support them and give them a good middle class quality of life. I didn't want to put the new baby in daycare last week and go back to work. I cried the whole way there. But there comes a time when we all have to make grown up decisions.

 

[NikiM20]

OP, for years I worked at jobs I didn't really like, I even went to school to cut hair. I did that for 5 years and decided not to do it anymore. I started working at a daycare, last summer I got a job as a teachers aide with special Ed children. I knew I would not like it, it was not " my thing " , but I had the summer off with dd along with holidays.
Fast forward one year , I love my job, this is my dream job but I had no idea when I took the position. I am going back to school to get my degree for special Ed.

My point is , what is " not your thing", could very well become something you love!! And as far as being a hands on learner, try a vocational school , that is mostly hands on and you will have skills to put on your resume

 

[hentob]

You REFUSE to work.

Your girlfriend works tons of hours and you (from a previous post) tell her how much she MUST work to pay the bills

You actually want to ask her parents for money, yet "working ain't your thing"?

Sorry. Pathetic comes to mind.

Special Kind of Lazy also comes to mind.


Grow up.

 

[ms.yt]

You REFUSE to work.

Your girlfriend works tons of hours and you (from a previous post) tell her how much she MUST to work to pay the bills

You actually want to ask her parents for money, yet "working ain't your thing"?

Sorry. Pathetic comes to mind.

Special Kind of Lazy also comes to mind.


Grow up.

Couldn't have said it better myself. Every post in every thread I read from OP, her immaturity and selfishness astound me.

 

[mum4jenn]

OMG!!!! I have been reading the responses and have been LMAO!!!! I am so glad that everyone else is seeing how lazy this person is and how pathetic it is to refuse to work but mooch off of everyone else as well as forcing their "friend" to work extra hours to pay her bills.

What a fantasy world this person is living in!!!!!

 

[SandrA9810]

you really wanna know why i don't work, don't care to, don't want to. I'd really rather take a long walk off a short a pier. Unfortantly I've always had some one there to constantly tell me life'll get better... i'm there for you ********. I really don't want Kari to go to the end of the world and back for me, i sure as hell don't deserve it, but the more i try to push away the closer she tries to get. I hate it, i wish she wouldn't. I get into fights with her, try to tell her to go live with her parent's. start her life over again.
I know I'm a pathetic loser that sucks at life, and I really don't even know why I'm here to begin with. But until then, you have the choice to ignore my topic. I said it in the first line, this is a vent, you could've back out to begin with. No one says you have to laugh and follow along with the topic.

 

[mum4jenn]

you really wanna know why i don't work, don't care to, don't want to. I'd really rather take a long walk off a short a pier. Unfortantly I've always had some one there to constantly tell me life'll get better... i'm there for you ********. I really don't want Kari to go to the end of the world and back for me, i sure as hell don't deserve it, but the more i try to push away the closer she tries to get. I hate it, i wish she wouldn't. I get into fights with her, try to tell her to go live with her parent's. start her life over again.
I know I'm a pathetic loser that sucks at life, and I really don't even know why I'm here to begin with. But until then, you have the choice to ignore my topic. I said it in the first line, this is a vent, you could've back out to begin with. No one says you have to laugh and follow along with the topic.

NO you have made it perfectly clear why you don't want to work. You can have all the excuses in the book but there are several people on here that also see what is going on. If Kari is the one paying the bills then she is not the one who needs to leave. The one that needs to leave is the one that does not have a job and does not help pay the bills and clearly has no desire to do so. You play the poor pitiful me routine until the person you are doing wrong and getting to pay your bills gets sick of you and then you move on to the next victim.

Again and you still do not seem to comprehend this very simple thing... If you write something on a DISCUSSION BOARD then people are going to respond. If you do not want anyone to respond and call you out on all of these topics then you need to do a BLOG. Plain and simple.

So whaah...whaah....whaah...everyone sees right through you.

 

[monkey68]

I'm with the others, if you want people to ignore it, don't put it on a message board. Or at least delete it without posting.

As for as getting a job, I didn't want to work either, but I had to, so I did. You suck it up and do what you have to do. You shouldn't be reliant on someone else to bail you out all the time.

 

[kaytieeldr]

you really wanna know why i don't work, don't care to, don't want to. I'd really rather take a long walk off a short a pier.

Thousands, if not millions of people 'don't want to work'.

So let's see. You don't work, won't work, don't want to work - yet you repeatedly post about
Your GF working too many hours
Never having any money
Roommates (that wouldn't even be needed if the two adults in a household each had an income)

 

[NHdisneylover]

you really wanna know why i don't work, don't care to, don't want to. I'd really rather take a long walk off a short a pier. Unfortantly I've always had some one there to constantly tell me life'll get better... i'm there for you ********. I really don't want Kari to go to the end of the world and back for me, i sure as hell don't deserve it, but the more i try to push away the closer she tries to get. I hate it, i wish she wouldn't. I get into fights with her, try to tell her to go live with her parent's. start her life over again.
I know I'm a pathetic loser that sucks at life, and I really don't even know why I'm here to begin with. But until then, you have the choice to ignore my topic. I said it in the first line, this is a vent, you could've back out to begin with. No one says you have to laugh and follow along with the topic.

But Sandra--the thing is you cannot just sit around and wait for someone to make your life what you want it to be for you. The world does not work that way. You will not be handed hapiness on a silver platter. You have to go out there and MAKE something out of your life. That is going to mean hard work and doing things you do not like (heck you might HATE them). It will also mean a feeling of acomplishment, maturing and eventaully happiness (not constant happiness--everyone has bad days--even bad months, but you can be overall pretty danged happy). But YOU have to put forth effort--a lot of it--to get there.

You wrote in the job thread that you are often fired because you do not get along with co-workers and bosses and you do not want to "change who you are" in order to do so. I think you may sometimes think making small, reasonable changes which are needed in society for everyone to get along means changing yourself. For example, you have been asked on many threads to explain who Kari is when you post. You refues to do so and alwasy defend calling her simply Kari (now because it is apprently what she wants). ALL you would have to do to make it much easier for people reading your threads to follow what you are talking about is write something like "my girlfriend Kari" the first time you refer to Kari in a thread and then everyone will be on the same page. This is not changing yourself--it is showing a minimal amount of consideration for those who are reading and trying to follow along. I do wonder how often your job issues may be related to such stubborn refusal on your part to make simple changes. I really think you need to stop and look at what you are doing that you can change (without changing your core being) that will help you immensly in the career world.

About being a mother--I love it. It IS what I always wanted to do. For most of my children's lives I have been able to be a stay at home mother (but when money got tght--and NEVER even close to not being able to pay for electric or doctors appointments--I was working ASAP because THEY are the prioirty and they are MY and my husband's responisiblity and no one elses to pay for). MOTHERING IS ALSO THE HARDEST JOB THERE IS! It is 24 hours a day and 7 days a week. It is often thankless. It is often exhausting. It is often messy. You WILL have to get along with teachers and docotrs and all kinds of people you may not like for the sake of your children. YOU CANNOT QUIT, or take a vacation and your children cannot fire you if you are not good at it. No matter how much you want to be a mother and how prepared you are you WILL run into aspect of this "job" that you do not like--everyone does (and you seem to dislike more things than anyone I know). Honestly, if you cannot handle holding down ANY job, if you insist on making special costly anniversary plans (yes, even just going out for dessert as a compromise when you could not get a cheap enough hotel room is too much to spend if you cannot pay the elctric bill and/or take your dog to the vet) when there is not a dime to spare, etc you are not at all ready to be a mother.
I hate to be harsh--I don't intend to be mean to you; I actually want to HELP you; the help I think you need is hearing the truth as many of us are trying to tell you: If you want that dream of being a mother to be a reality you need to:

First show that you have the ability to truly care for another living creature and do what you need to do for your dog. Either give him to someone who can care for him or find the money to take him to the vet yourself. If you keep him, do not spend money on anything extra (not even a cup of coffee out) until you have a good amount of money put away to be sure he will be well fed and have needed vet visits covered in the future.

Next, learn to take care of yourself. Get a job and keep it. Be fantastic at that job even if you hate it. Especially if you hate it. Then feel good about yourself for having the guts and the maturity to stick it out. You need to be able to stick to something for at least a year--mothering is an 18 years to life commitment.

Then work with Kari to both earn enough to repair your credit and get a good place to live that is appropraite for having children. SAVE enough money that you have somehting to fall back on if you hit unexpected job issues, car repairs, etc. Then work with Kari to figure out how you will all live and who will be wokring and what you feel is right to provide for a child/chidlren. If you want to be a stay at home mother then Kari has to be on board with supporting the entire family herself (this is a lot of stress and pressure--I know my DH does it) AND you have to be on board with knowing that should something happen to Kari or her job your desire to be an at home mother may well have to take a backseat to your children's NEEDs for food, electricty, medical care, etc. THEN if you and Kari can work out a realistic budget that truly lives within your means (there will always be unexpected expenses with kids--you have to plan on that), THEN you may be ready to be a mom. Honestly, I think you are years away from that sort of maturity--but you can get there if you are willing to WORK for it.
Best of luck. I do hope your grandmother recovers well and your dog is able to get the care he needs and is okay.

 

[Annie68]

But Sandra--the thing is you cannot just sit around and wait for someone to make your life what you want it to be for you. The world does not work that way. You will not be handed hapiness on a silver platter. You have to go out there and MAKE something out of your life. That is going to mean hard work and doing things you do not like (heck you might HATE them). It will also mean a feeling of acomplishment, maturing and eventaully happiness (not constant happiness--everyone has bad days--even bad months, but you can be overall pretty danged happy). But YOU have to put forth effort--a lot of it--to get there.

You wrote in the job thread that you are often fired because you do not get along with co-workers and bosses and you do not want to "change who you are" in order to do so. I think you may sometimes think making small, reasonable changes which are needed in society for everyone to get along means changing yourself. For example, you have been asked on many threads to explain who Kari is when you post. You refues to do so and alwasy defend calling her simply Kari (now because it is apprently what she wants). ALL you would have to do to make it much easier for people reading your threads to follow what you are talking about is write something like "my girlfriend Kari" the first time you refer to Kari in a thread and then everyone will be on the same page. This is not changing yourself--it is showing a minimal amount of consideration for those who are reading and trying to follow along. I do wonder how often your job issues may be related to such stubborn refusal on your part to make simple changes. I really think you need to stop and look at what you are doing that you can change (without changing your core being) that will help you immensly in the career world.

About being a mother--I love it. It IS what I always wanted to do. For most of my children's lives I have been able to be a stay at home mother (but when money got tght--and NEVER even close to not being able to pay for electric or doctors appointments--I was working ASAP because THEY are the prioirty and they are MY and my husband's responisiblity and no one elses to pay for). MOTHERING IS ALSO THE HARDEST JOB THERE IS! It is 24 hours a day and 7 days a week. It is often thankless. It is often exhausting. It is often messy. You WILL have to get along with teachers and docotrs and all kinds of people you may not like for the sake of your children. YOU CANNOT QUIT, or take a vacation and your children cannot fire you if you are not good at it. No matter how much you want to be a mother and how prepared you are you WILL run into aspect of this "job" that you do not like--everyone does (and you seem to dislike more things than anyone I know). Honestly, if you cannot handle holding down ANY job, if you insist on making special costly anniversary plans (yes, even just going out for dessert as a compromise when you could not get a cheap enough hotel room is too much to spend if you cannot pay the elctric bill and/or take your dog to the vet) when there is not a dime to spare, etc you are not at all ready to be a mother.
I hate to be harsh--I don't intend to be mean to you; I actually want to HELP you; the help I think you need is hearing the truth as many of us are trying to tell you: If you want that dream of being a mother to be a reality you need to:

First show that you have the ability to truly care for another living creature and do what you need to do for your dog. Either give him to someone who can care for him or find the money to take him to the vet yourself. If you keep him, do not spend money on anything extra (not even a cup of coffee out) until you have a good amount of money put away to be sure he will be well fed and have needed vet visits covered in the future.

Next, learn to take care of yourself. Get a job and keep it. Be fantastic at that job even if you hate it. Especially if you hate it. Then feel good about yourself for having the guts and the maturity to stick it out. You need to be able to stick to something for at least a year--mothering is an 18 years to life commitment.

Then work with Kari to both earn enough to repair your credit and get a good place to live that is appropraite for having children. SAVE enough money that you have somehting to fall back on if you hit unexpected job issues, car repairs, etc. Then work with Kari to figure out how you will all live and who will be wokring and what you feel is right to provide for a child/chidlren. If you want to be a stay at home mother then Kari has to be on board with supporting the entire family herself (this is a lot of stress and pressure--I know my DH does it) AND you have to be on board with knowing that should something happen to Kari or her job your desire to be an at home mother may well have to take a backseat to your children's NEEDs for food, electricty, medical care, etc. THEN if you and Kari can work out a realistic budget that truly lives within your means (there will always be unexpected expenses with kids--you have to plan on that), THEN you may be ready to be a mom. Honestly, I think you are years away from that sort of maturity--but you can get there if you are willing to WORK for it.
Best of luck. I do hope your grandmother recovers well and your dog is able to get the care he needs and is okay.

Great post! Is the OP dealing with some emotional/psychological issues perhaps?

 

[just4today]

Great post! Is the OP dealing with some emotional/psychological issues perhaps?

NHdisneylover's advice is excellent and straightforward. I would add that counseling would probably be beneficial. Many communities have free or reduced-price counseling available for people who can't pay. It would give you a chance to talk with someone who is non-judgmental and sort out why you feel the way you do and what you can do to change it.

 

[BelleWDW]

you really wanna know why i don't work, don't care to, don't want to. I'd really rather take a long walk off a short a pier. Unfortantly I've always had some one there to constantly tell me life'll get better... i'm there for you ********.

I know I'm a pathetic loser that sucks at life, and I really don't even know why I'm here to begin with..

Wow. You really, really need to find something that you enjoy doing.

You seemed to like that Suitcase thing that you bring to vacationing DISers-why not look into something to do with people vacationing in Orlando? Be a delivery person for a Florist that delivers to WDW? There has to be something you can do to earn money and give you that satisfaction of making others lives happier

 

[mum4jenn]

Wow. You really, really need to find something that you enjoy doing.

You seemed to like that Suitcase thing that you bring to vacationing DISers-why not look into something to do with people vacationing in Orlando? Be a delivery person for a Florist that delivers to WDW? There has to be something you can do to earn money and give you that satisfaction of making others lives happier

Ya know...even THAT is a scary thought. She seems to be so unstable I would never in a million years meet up with her for her to bring me a suitcase of junk. I would hope that others who have signed up will do a bit of research on past posts by this person and re-think their decision.

Maybe though once she gets some mental help maybe a delivery person's job would be ok for her. One day she will run out of friends that will be willing to help her.

 

[Disney1fan2002]

OP, do you have any kids? (no counting the dog) I don't know ANY couple that does not have kid, where one of them stays home to take care of the other. Your grandomother stayed home because she was taking care of kids. It may be true that some people can be so jealous, they won't allow their partner to work, even if there are no kids in the picture. But you are living a fantasy. A complete fantasy if you think that you should stay home to take "care" of Kari, while she works her *** off to pay the bills you say there isn't enough money for.

Cripes, even a part time job would be better than nothing at all.

 

[phorsenuf]

Can we go to the bus thing for a minute. How did you take a bus from Disney to MCO? Did you just hop on ME or something?

 

[islandmum]

You REFUSE to work.

Your girlfriend works tons of hours and you (from a previous post) tell her how much she MUST work to pay the bills

You actually want to ask her parents for money, yet "working ain't your thing"?

Sorry. Pathetic comes to mind.

Special Kind of Lazy also comes to mind.


Grow up.

 

[Scurvy]

I was trying to figure out how to express what I wanted to say, but then NHdisneylover said it better than I ever could. I agree with every word of her post.

Another thing that I wanted to mention, though, is that most people don't love their jobs. Some people are lucky enough to be able to have a job that they love doing, but most people work because they have to, not because they want to. If you don't want to work and financially you are able to stay home, then that's great and most people would envy you. If your partner enjoys working and wants you to stay home while she earns enough to support the two of you then that is the way you two should live. However, your dog is a part of your family and it sounds like you can't currently afford to support the dog. You should probably look into finding someone who can afford to support a dog and would like yours, and give the dog to them if you aren't able to pay for the things the dog needs. Until you are financially able to care for a dog or a child, it is probably not a good idea to bring another living thing into your family.

For most people, choosing not to work requires some sacrifices. In your case, it sounds like those might consist in part of your partner working longer hours, having to have room mates, and not having pets or children right now (and possibly not ever having them).