My poor DS.

[Jennifer S]

I have a very shy child that has a hard time joining things - like sports. Well his teacher decided to run a program called "After school sports". My DS was thrilled and wanted to join. He brought the form home we filled it out and he took back this morning. Guess what??


IT WAS ALREADY FILLED!!!! They got the form yesterday and by the time he walked into the classroom this morning it was filled up. My son is a safety and has to stay at the front door until all the kids get into the school so he was last to the classroom.

I called the teacher and he said "Sorry my hands are tied". He felt bad but said there was nothing he can do.

I don't see how that is a fair way to organize it. I'm so mad and sad for my son.

 

[JunieJay]

Poor guy.

Can he be put on a waiting list? That does seem unfair, especially since he mustered his courage to join.

 

[mickeyboat]

Something similar happened at my girls' school with some of the programs they offer. Yoga Club, Dance Club, French Club, etc. By the time I get the information, it is already filled.

It would be nice if the school did a survey to gauge interest in a particular activity, and then organized the program around projected participation.

How long does the program run? Will your son have an opportunity to participate in another session later in the year?

Denae

 

[Jennifer S]

He is number 1 on the waiting list but the teacher said almost no one drops out. I'm just so upset because it's so hard for him to join things and this is the only thing he wanted to try.

 

[Katie]

I agree, if they offer a program, and you brought the form back the next day...how did they decide who got to partipate or not..especially, because you son was doing "community service".

I think i would push the issue.

Good Luck!

 

[Jennifer S]

How long does the program run? Will your son have an opportunity to participate in another session later in the year?

Denae

It runs until March. The teacher said they will run another one when this one is over. Some kids get in numerous times though. My DS would never try before. This was the first time. The teacher said he'll guarentee him a spot next time. I should be fine with that and normally I would if he had other activities to participate in. I hope he's still willing in March.

 

[Jennifer S]

I agree, if they offer a program, and you brought the form back the next day...how did they decide who got to partipate or not..especially, because you son was doing "community service".

I think i would push the issue.

Good Luck!

That's what I was thinking - but how? They said it's filled to capacity and there is nothing they can do. I hate to go to the principal but they do need a better way of deciding who gets in and who doesn't. At the very least they should open up another class.

 

[Katie]

Some kids get in numerous times

I would suggest, letting the kids who have NOT had the opportunity to participate, have a chance before the kids who have done it in the past.

Does that make sense??

 

[swanmom]

Our school uses a lottery system for after-school activites where there is more interest than spaces. Everyone who returns the form by a specified date is then entered into a lottery and names are picked. Fairer and leaves less room for frustration and complaints.
Otherwise, we literally had parents picking up their kids from school, going through the backpacks and 'running' back into the school to get their forms in first.......

 

[Jennifer S]

It makes total sense. I am just the type of person who hates to make waves. I hate going over the teachers head. I don't want to be the "problem" parent. I'm thinking of writing to suggest they try and find a fairer way of doing it in the future.

 

[Katie]

ur school uses a lottery system for after-school activites where there is more interest than spaces.

Excellent idea!!! Maybe you should suggest that idea...seems like the fairest of all!

 

[Stitch1404]

That's so hard. My daughter is 7 and she is painfully shy, I know that would just shatter her if she got up the courage to do something like that and it didn't work out. People have offered some good suggestions though, maybe it can still work out!

 

[Jennifer S]

I wrote a letter to the two teachers running it and offered the suggestions you guys gave me- lottery etc. It may do nothing but it made me feel better. Hopefully someone will drop out and he'll get a chance.

Thanks for listening. I'll let you know what happens -if anything.

 

[Sparx]

They shouldn't have taken forms until everyone was in there.

i was in an art club in middle school that had a HUGE following, but I basically kept the show going and I was in it for two years, on the third year they installed a "first twenty in" rule. I'd been there for every meeting for two years, I felt like I deserved my spot, I got there early and waited until she would take the forms. She wouldn't until school had officially started. Not while kids were arriving. Thats how those things are supposed to be done.

 

[Chilehead Too]

They shouldn't have taken forms until everyone was in there.

.

I agree. What about if a bus was late or there are many other reasons kids could be late that is not within their control.

So if your child is the first one in school that morning, they autmatically get on? Just doesn't seem fair at all.

 

[RLccweems]

He is number 1 on the waiting list but the teacher said almost no one drops out. I'm just so upset because it's so hard for him to join things and this is the only thing he wanted to try.

If I were you I would have a talk with the school principal....if he/she doesn't know your child that well, explain to them what he's like and how this will help him. They may let him join because it'll help with his shyness. I know they done this before with other kids at our school. It's can hurt....


lettie

 

[Florida_Mom]

If I were you I would have a talk with the school principal....if he/she doesn't know your child that well, explain to them what he's like and how this will help him. They may let him join because it'll help with his shyness. I know they done this before with other kids at our school. It's can hurt....


lettie

I agree. Also, I would tell the principal that your son didn't get in because he was serving the school, as a safety. This shouldn't preclude him from having an equal shot.

If it were me, I would talk with the teacher and "confide" in them that you want to work on the "his hands are tied" bit, by the person who is tying the hands. I would say (again if it were me) "I appreciate you so much for what you are willing to do with this after school sports thing. I just really want it to work out for my son because he really needs this. Would you mind if I talked with Mrs. XYZ (principal) about it? Maybe she can do something? Do you have any other suggestions for me?" If the teacher can see that I am trying to work with them rather than going above his head, and that I'm trying to enlist them to help me, then I have a better shot at success, I think. I might even volunteer to help the organizing teacher. JMHO.

Good luck! We have to be our children's advocates. Very few others will be.

 

[JESW]

Our school does the same thing (run an after school Variety Sports program where the kids play Capture the Flag, Floor Hockey, etc) and the classes fill up FAST! Especially this time of year when it's cold (and usually snowy) and the kids have no way to burn off that extra energy. The gym teacher runs the program 2 nights a week and dd7 is lucky that a lot of the other kids are in CCD on monday night so she has no problem getting in that night. Tuesday night fills up right away. We wish the teacher offered it every night as there are several of us who would put the kids in more than one night if there was room. Is there a way the school could run it another night also? If it is so popular and filled up so quickly, there are probably more kids than just your son on the waiting list.

I do hope that he can get in since he wanted it so much. I have a ds12 who is an Asperger's kid, along with other issues and in 6th grade. This is the FIRST time in all his school years that he wanted to be in an after-school enrichment program. He is taking a clay class and the teacher is young and new to teaching (she teaches 4th & 5th grade art) and so good with the kids. She knows of my sons issues and has been so good with him. I was so happy that he finally wanted to do something and that he enjoys it.

Good luck!!!

Jill

 

[Sherri]

He is number 1 on the waiting list but the teacher said almost no one drops out. I'm just so upset because it's so hard for him to join things and this is the only thing he wanted to try.

Personally I feel like this should run like field trips do when they choose chaparones. They say limited amount of space, but everyone handing in a form by a deadline will be in a drawing to see who gets the spots.
That way everyone has the same shot and the same deadline to get it in, not the first one through the door.
What grade is ds in? It would be so nice if they could add him since he is the very next in line and was in on safety patrol at the time.
I'm sorry for ds, its hard to see kids so excited about something then unfairly let down.

 

[Jennifer S]

Sherri - he's in 5th grade. It is his last year in this elemenatry school. I totally agree about a lottery system and if you get in once then the next time you should not be eligible.

I did send an email to the two teachers that run it and made the suggestion.

DS is handeling it very well. I found out later that another reason he was so upset because a kid in his class made fun of him for not getting in. He saw my DS was upset and was taunting him. Why are kids so mean?

Thanks again everyone for the support. I hope he gets a spot. If not it's a life lesson learned. I'm proud of him