my mother is chronically ill

boppy

Mouseketeer
Joined
Jul 22, 2007
Messages
149
I am having a really bad time today. My mother is in the hospital, again. She was just in for 14 days, out 2, back in again. She is sick all the time.
She has a history of chronic bladder infections, uti's, etc. She also has kidney disease and recently started dialysis. She also has lymphoma, which thankfully is under control. she is depressed over the loss of my father, last december. They had been married 42 years. He died of lung cancer.

Is is selfish to say I am tired of thinking about all this? I just want to forget it. I want to be able to enjoy my kids, my husband, my life without dreading the phone when it rings. I love my mother, but I have a life too. I can't fix this.

Then I come here and read some of the situations other people are dealing with, and I realize maybe I don't have it so bad. But I'm really tired.

Thanks for listening.
 
:hug:I am so sorry that you are experiencing all this. I'm sorry for the loss of your father last year, the holidays can be a hard time when an anniversary rolls around. I understand your tiredness. My mother is in a very advanced stage of Parkinson's Disease and has been quite ill with complications for quite some time. Just when we think she won't last much longer, she rebounds which we are grateful for, but it gets very physically and emotionally trying.
Anytime we get a phone call from any number relating to my family, my heart drops to my stomach. I live out of state from my mom which poses other challenges, but it is ok to take time for yourself and your family. There have been times I have avoided talking with my mom and family because it is just soo hard. But then I realize there is a balance. She is in quality of life Hospice right now, and even the Hospice counselors will tell you to find the balance in your life so that you don't get burnt out.

No, you can't fix it. But you can follow your heart to do what you know inside is right, and then find that balance to give you and your family what they need too. Be gentle on each other and on yourself. :hug:

....and to add, everyone has their burdens in life~ it doesn't mean that anyone has it easier or harder than you do, just their own situations. It shouldn't take away from you that it is your own heartache. I do find it good to read others' threads and pray for them, for all of us. JMO.
 
:grouphug:

Just wanted to let you know I read your post. I don't have any real advice. I have not been in your situation. My DD has alot of health concerns.

Do follow your heart. Make choices for your self. We only get one chance at this life. Take care. :hug:
 
Thanks, both of you, for your kind words. I am going to have to do more to find that balance. Thanks again!
 




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