My husband left me....

[Mishetta]

for a 4 day trip to CA to visit his family. He hasn't been there in 4 years to see them but his Dad's health is going downhill so he figured he'd best go. Now....the logical side of me wanted him to go & spend some time with his family but my heart will miss him sooooo much.

We both hugged, kissed & cried. As he drove down our street, baby & I waved (& DH too) until we couldn't see each other anymore. He called me while on his way to the airport & then again as soon as he parked his car & again from the airport terminal. He was crying too. It's so hard for us to be separated, even for just a few days. I guess it's because we're still newlyweds (married only 10 years) that we are this way.

The last time he went on this family trip, he called me 6 times per day. His father finally told him that he should just stay home next time because he was on the phone with me the whole time!

I don't know what I'd do if my DH traveled for a living or heaven forbid if he was in the armed forces & was being shipped out!!

Do you suffer terribly when your spouse is out of town?

 

[snoopy]

Awww, I'm sorry Mishetta. 4 days will be over before you know it.

In the meantime, hang here with us on the DIS.

 

[Mermaid02]

Suffer? No. I miss him (most of the time ) but sometimes it's good to be "separated".... he's working out of town this week... coming home tomorrow afternoon.

 

[EsmeraldaX]

Try to take this time to do something special with your baby.
When baby is napping, take some time to do something that you enjoy and don't get much chance to do usually.

 

[Auggietina]

4 days is nothing....

I going on 7 months

6.5 months until I see him again

Count your blessings its only 4 days

 

[browneyes]

I wish my SO was with your DH, Mishetta.

 

[binny]

we go through this every month! My dh travels for work and is usually gone 3 nights a month min.

The kids and I miss him a lot.
But after 8 years I guess weve gotten used to it.

 

[Disney Doll]

My DH is on a business trip this week and has been gone since Tuesday, due back Friday and I miss him!!!!! We seldom travel without each other, have no kids to keep me busy.

But then I feel bad when I hear of military spouses who do without their loved ones for months on end, and I feel like a whiney baby.

 

[CamColt]

Awwww, He will be back before you know it.

DH and I have only been separated once for a few days when he had to go on a business trip. Ive never been thrilled with the idea. With that said, he has convinced me(practically forced me ) to go to WDW alone for 4 days in December. Again, Im not thrilled about leaving him and the kids, but I guess I have to do it. Im sure it wont be too tough once Im there.

 

[my3kids]

It's lonely alone, but try to make it fun. Take the kids out to eat at someplace your DH hates. All pile into your bed and watch a movie and eat popcorn....something tidy spouses would never allow!! Throw a sweater on the floor and EGADS.....Leave it there!!!! Step over it for the whole time he's gone just so you know you can!!! Enjoy being neatnik free!!

 

[Stephanie218]

totally agree with Auggietina.

4 days is nothing. count your blessings if that's all you ever have to be seperated and stop whining.

my DBF and i go to college in Arizona and Massachusetts respectively, and i won't see him for another 4 months.

my dad travels for a living, and when i was young he'd be in Japan, South America, or Europe at least 6 months out of the year. i'm sure my mother didn't start whining after 4 days.

nevermind the military families that deal with years and months of seperation.

i think a little thought is needed to the reality of the situation.

 

[scarlett873]

i know how you feel!! dh and i are joined at the hip...neither of us can sleep when the other's not there. we talk on the phone or chat online as much as possible! thankfully, he doesn't travel too much for work!

 

[luvwinnie]

I just went to the shore for 3 nights with my nieces and sister, DH stayed home. We had a lot of fun, but I did miss him! I see nothing wrong with a few days apart...it's good to miss each other!!

 

[binny]

geez, can we not be so harsh on the OP please. She misses her husband and isnt used to being away from him.

My parents hardly ever spent a night apart and I know they hated it when they had to!


I know many people are seperated for longer periods of time but she isnt used to it at all. Give her a break!

 

[scarlett873]

Originally posted by Stephanie218
totally agree with Auggietina.

4 days is nothing. count your blessings if that's all you ever have to be seperated and stop whining.

my DBF and i go to college in Arizona and Massachusetts respectively, and i won't see him for another 4 months.

my dad travels for a living, and when i was young he'd be in Japan, South America, or Europe at least 6 months out of the year. i'm sure my mother didn't start whining after 4 days.

nevermind the military families that deal with years and months of seperation.

i think a little thought is needed to the reality of the situation.

while i agree with counting your blessings when it's just for a few days, i think that this was kind of harsh. it's tough on some couples to be apart, no matter what the length of time is. it's tough on me and my DH when it's just for a few days as well. and i'll whine if my dh is gone for 2 days! we aren't used to it...his job doesn't require it...therefore i can whine if i want to about it!

i have tremendous respect for military families who have to deal with extended seperations...i know i couldn't do it...

whine away mishetta!!! i'll listen to ya!

 

[tkyes]

Absence makes the heart grow fonder!

DH's previous job required him to travel about once a week. It wasn't easy at first, and long trips were hard, but I kind of like having a little time to myself. No one to hog the blankets and no one to roll their eyes when I take an hour long bath

4 days will fly by!

 

[tc]

It's true that other spouses are separated for a longer period of time, but that does not make it any easier for Mishetta. Her pain in missing her husband is real, no matter whether others "have it worse" or not. I don't think she's whining, she just misses her husband, and is not used to being a part.

Mishetta: I am the same way when Stephen is gone. He goes to Mexico every Spring Break on a mission trip with the high school kids from church. I am a basket case when he is gone, and, he can't call me. There's usually no cell service there. We've been married 24 years, and I miss him as bad as when we were first married.

Hugs and pd and, yes, count your blessings that he's not gone any longer. However, don't feel guilty just because he's only gone four days and you miss him.

 

[newmousecateer]

Awww, hope the time goes by fast for you.....

I wish my SO was with your DH, Mishetta.

LOL Shannon....and I'll throw in my husband too!

 

[~*Belle 2003*~]

I would be fine in the day but would miss DH being around at night.

4 days will fly by Mishetta, and it will seem like he isn't that far from you if you're talking to him regularly on the phone too!

 

[happydisfamilyof4]

Four days!??! I would be thrilled with only four days. My DH is active duty military and is currently gone. We realized the other day that if in fact does come home when expected he will have been away 21 out of the previous 36 months!

Sitting around dwelling on the four days will only make it worse. Find something fun to do with the kids. Go to a movie, go out to eat, cuddle up on the couch and watch a movie with the kids, and just stay busy. Someone once told me that if you are no good at being alone than you will be no good to the person you are with!

As harsh as it sounds I agree with his dad. If he is constantly calling you, when does he have time to enjoy his visit with his family? Let him enjoy his family and keep the calls at once or twice a day. (We are lucky if we get to talk to DH once a week!) You have had him there with you for four straight years...give his family four days.

This is not meant as an attack in any way. I know what it is like to miss your spose, but there is nothing you can do about that now. You understand why he wanted to go, now be supportive while he is there and don't dwell on him being away, think about the fun you will have an the years and years ahead of you with him home.