My Fat Flush Journal...Officially begins 3/3!...comments welcome

[TxRabbit]

Here it is Ladies...the big question. The question for why do you continue to eat things that you KNOW you shouldn't?

What is missing from your life that makes you so determined to prove to yourself that what you want can be yours?

Good Lord above. Control issues abound here. Something is missing from life and having control and giving myself something that I want is a way of trying to fill the void of something missing.

 

[LAinSEA]

I wish I knew what made me want the foods I want--right now it's something sweet and I wouldn't be satified with berries (even if I could find them fresh and inexpensive currently.) I want pastries (and they are most definitely not on plan for me right now or probably ever).

What drives me...late afternoon hunger and frustration leading to the desire to CRUNCH! (yes, the noise helps the stress level, but leads to guilt over crunching).

I know there is a theory out there that some of us have put the protective layers on ourselves for a reason (abuse at some point or neglect by loved ones), but for me, when I look in the mirror, I still see me at 218 instead of me at 153. I don't look any different to me despite needing smaller jeans. Maybe when I really see me at 153, I will be able to visualize myself at 128 (my goal weight) and actually get there. But right now, I'm still the fat wife in the mirror.

Keep up the informative posts - your reseach is valuable!

Laurie

 

[TxRabbit]

DS's birthday was this past Sunday. He had a 3-day weekend with a student holiday on Monday. We took a little trip out of town, staying one night in San Antonio and one night in Austin. Planning this adventure has kept me away from the boards and my journal.

The trip was a welcome break. Thanks to the influence of these books I have been reading, I tried something new. Road trip food is always hard. We drove ourselves this weekend. When I had asked DS what he wanted to eat on his birthday, he wanted a double chocolate brownie from Starbucks for breakfast, Wendy's for lunch and pizza for dinner. We have been eating from home a lot so he was very interested in getting his fast food fix.

I wasn't exactly as he hoped...lol. I experimented though. I had come to realize that I eat very fast. Very VERY fast. In general. There are times when I will slow down and enjoy a meal, but generally, I eat so very fast. So I purposely slowed my self down. We got Whataburger on the road. I got a normal combo. Normal sized. Got onion rings instead of fried (they have the BEST onion rings).

Enjoying my food. Realizing that my food wasn't going anywhere (and neither was I in the driver's seat, more than an hour away from my destination), I concentrated on chewing, swallowing, having a sip of iced tea. Lo and behold, I coudn't finish the whole burger or even half of the onion rings. I realized that I felt a bit guilty. Here was good money going to waste. I had a satisfying meal though, so that was a good value for my money. I didn't need to pay for an extra layer of insulation.

I learned this lesson well later. I didn't get any fries. And I got a whopper jr. Yes, people, I really am trying to get healthier, but this is road trip food for a 9-year old's birthday.

Overall, I was happy with my eating. I enjoyed what I ate. I didn't every feel stuffed, or that I had OVER eaten. I started eating slower and enjoying my food. And I realized that the books are right. Variety is a real killer when it comes to eating. Have less variety. Get a little sick of the way your food is tasting. Realize that you are satisfied enough, and you can not finish those last bites.

The clutter book is really great. I have the book that is totally focused on clutter requested at the library. Meanwhile, I hit the kitchen. Here's the deal. The book says, how can you control what goes into your mouth if you can't even control the kitchen?

I can't overcome too many obstacles right now. I need things to be easy. So I completely cleaned the kitchen. Yay the dishwasher is back! I've been in a constant state of trying to organize, downsize, and otherwise simplify my life. So it wasn't as bad as it could be to completely clean out the cabinets, clear out the unused items. Make it easily to use my kitchen. My kitchen is beautiful right now. Two nights in a row!

Today, I hit the eating area, which had been piled high with a mountain of papers and other things. I dealt with it all. Finally. I went shopping. I got a new table cloth. I got chair cushions for the wood chairs. New potholders. New dishtowels. New kitchen hand towels. I put a nice arrangement of decor on the table with the new cloth. Something to act as a deterant for dumping. There's a new rule in the house. DON'T DUMP ON MY KITCHEN COUNTER!! Don't dump on the eating space either.

If eating right is going to be a priority, then you can't taint the space and make it difficult to do. Dump somewhere else as we get things organized and taken care of. Leave the kitchen alone.

I'm pretty pumped about all of this. Last night I tried a recipe for tortillas that I have been wanting to try FOREVER. They were AWESOME!! Made homemade salsa. Tried a new rub recipe for some grilled chicken. Grilled onions and peppers with the chicken. It was an awesome dinner.

Tonight, the tortillas were so good, I had to do it again. I did a saucy turkey crockpot recipe that I new we liked. It was easy. I knew it wasn't DSs fav, and we had left over chicken for him.

Yesterday and today. I feel great. I made good food for us. Homemade food. The kind of food that I am proud to serve my family. It was fun to work in my clean kitchen. It motivates me to keep it up. I have to take some time to get things entered into nutrimirror to see how it was, but right now, I'm just thrilled that we are eating homemade food. Homemade in the extreme. I love it. I know exactly what was in those tortillas. We didn't eat a bunch of junk, so no matter the caloric value, I know that the food that I ate was healthy. Whether or not it was condusive to weight loss in another story. But the first steps are being taken. I'm focusing on keeping the machine running. Food from home is step number one.

Tomorrow, I'm working on the pantries and the fridge/freezer. Clean out time. Reorganize to support the current goal time. Took salmon out for dinner tomorrow. If you want to order the best salmon ever, check out great-alaskan-seafood. I highly recommend. Once you order from them and get their emails, you can get some great deals. Wild caught, super fresh. I generally buy this excellent salmon for around $10 a pound. Not super cheap, but super cheap for the quality that it is.

As to the question that I posted...man this post is long...I have an answer for one must have food of my own. I have a weakness for Chinese. Just gotta have it. The fresh stir fries (not batter dipped, fried stuff). Love the noodles too. So apparantly, my mom was put on a sodium restricted diet when she was pregnant with me. She couldn't even eat celery, which has a lot of naturally occuring sodium. She didn't know about soy sauce, and she ate a TON of chinese food. LOVED the stir fries, the noodles. She ate it ALL THE TIME. Studies show that you predispose your unborn child to like the food you eat while pregnant. Funny. Now I understand. Because seriously folks, there are times when I just HAVE to have some good Chinese. And now I have a clue why that is.

 

[TxRabbit]

We are gearing up for another move. One depressed Thanksgiving, I sat down and figured out where I spent the previous Thanksgivings since graduating college. Then I figured out where I had lived over the past 13+ years and discovered that DH and I had been moving an average of every 13 months. Kinda sick, huh? Every 13 months over 13+ years?

I'm pretty sure I mentioned that DH had been commuting 120 miles a day for almost 2 years now. The big goal is to have the house on the market this spring. We have been in the midst of home improvement since we moved in, in June 2006. One big long home improvement project. Ugh. After two new constructions homes, we decided to buy resale, and to get some projects. Ugh. It would be better if we had gotten a better deal, but we purchased right before everything started to bottom out. Not that Texas is as affected as the rest of the country. Can't be with our property taxes.

So finally we need to have an absolutely fabulous home to put on the market. We NEED to maximize our dollars here. We also need to overcome a bit of a location issue. Our house backs up to the main road into the master planned community, which is nice for privacy, but not so great for road noise and a perceived lowered value.

I have a closet pantry in the kitchen. The kind that has a real door that opens into a shallow but 4' wide space. The kind of space that is a real pain to reach the side items. Well. Mine has no door. The floor is the same as the kitchen. Tile. It's the perfect place to put the kitty food and water (we have two kittys) and so I have an open pantry.

This is where I started cleaning out. With all the pantry items on the clear and clean kitchen counters, and the pantry all vacuumed and cleaned, I realized that now would be the perfect opportunity to paint that thing. And so I did. I caulked, primed and painted (first coat) on Thursday! It's like I said to my mom, there are still so many projects to do around the house, you don't really need to plan, you just need to see what you are in the mood to do that day.

It looks fabulous btw. The second coat will be much better, but the first, the color of the cabinets if they were to be matched to a paint color, looks really nice. The pantry is like an accent, a different color than the walls, but because it matches the cabinetry color, it just totally blends in and looks right, for being open.

Meanwhile, I have embarked on a personal pantry, freezer challenge. Budget board anyone? And I am endeavoring to use up the items that have been collecting dust. The one day items. The items for that recipe that I've been wanting to try... The food in the freezer that has been there because I keep forgeting to take anything out the night before.

So I haven't been to the grocery store yet since last week. Today, DH had to get buttermilk (he really wanted waffles) and a thing of prewashed spring mix salad. (We get the 1lb container).

Me and my clean kitchen have been producing gourmet quality meals. It's been an absolute blast. I have a new appreciation for my dishwasher, after living over a month without it, I totally love having it and faithfully load it and unload it with a grateful heart that it does what it does so well. Tonight we had lamb shoulder chops with white beans. The recipe cooks in the slow cooker and includes onions, oil-packed sun dried tomatoes, a bit of thyme, cumin and adding white beans half way thru. Absolutely FABULOUS.

I also made some homemade turkey stock from the bones of the Thanksgiving turkey in the freezer, and made a turkey noodle soup for DH (no carrots or celery added LOL).

I'm thrilled to be cooking and cleaning. Maybe you cook. Maybe you don't eat out a lot. This is a MAJOR accomplishment for me. To consistantly being cooking and cooking in a clean kitchen is somewhat of a novelty. Hasn't happened too often in life. You see. I LOVE to cook. I really do. I HATE to clean. I really do. But I've done what I can to make it all easier on myself, and the results of the past week show that this is working much better than it has anytime recently.

Currently, the thought is to go through the food stuffs that have accumulated. These may or may not be in tune with the whole fat flush plan. Most aren't. Beans. Etc. So I am just focusing on cooking. Cooking and cleaning. And as I restock, I will buy what works with the plan. Meanwhile. I will be in the mode of cooking and cleaning. Yay!

I was very sore from all the pantry painting. You really have to contort yourself around to get in all the places. I had on some good music and I couldn't help but dance around a bit too to limber up from the contortions.

Here's an interesting tidbit that I will never tire of repeating. I may have already written this here in my journal, but it's so good, it bears repeating. There was a study performed that involved housekeepers of a major hotel chain. Half of the housekeepers were educated in how their jobs, by virtue of their responsibilities, satisfied their daily requirements for exercise. Nothing else. The educated housekeepers lost weight, without making any changes in their diet. The uneducated housekeepers didn't. The conclusion of the study emphasized the power of the mind. If you think of what you are doing as exercise, then your body will respond to it.

I've taken to dressing in my exercise clothing for doing the houseprojects. Including maintenance. Like cleaning. I haven't spent too much time on the scale. I'm more concerned with life change and realizing that I need a life style change, especially if I am to survive this move and not backtrack like we are so wont to do whenever we move. But I anticipate that whenever I do anything that remotely resembles exercise, I definitely THINK about it as exercise and pray that my body will respond accordingly.

It's been a great week. Except for Starbucks, we didn't eat out AT ALL!!! And for this to include a Saturday morning? Afternoon? Evening? WOW!! Yay for us!!

 

[TxRabbit]

This has been a most interesting time. Things are progressing forward with the house projects and still the kitchen keeps producing. In the past, house projects have taken over and I have slacked off kitchen duty, but this time it is all different.

I will have to go to the store today. DH needs coffee. I don't want to get anything more than absolute necessity. I'm serious about cleaning out the pantry and the freezer. There is nothing worse than having to move food. It is such a waste really. You get to a new place and you have to unpack all this old food. Some is nice. It's always good to have your spices and oils, etc. The things that you regularly use in other things. But otherwise...

So food has been really weird in the house. I'm just cooking whatever we have to eat. As the nutritional gatekeeper in the house, we generally have pretty good things to eat. I'm not a comfort food cook. I don't have a bunch of fattening recipes in my repetoire. I'm mostly a griller for meats. This has been quite challenging, but in a way, it has been free-ing. I don't have the whole world of possibilities to choose from, I just have the freezer and the pantry. What can I make with that? As opposed to, what should I buy and make?

Meanwhile, I haven't been keeping track of what we have been eating. The novelty of it wore off and other things have been taking priority. I can see the importance of getting it back into my routine though. It is difficult to contemplate doing because food has been so funny lately. Not normal at all, and really hard to track. I guess I better figure all this out though if this is something that I want to be a part of my daily routine. And really, I discover that this is what it is all about. Working out a new routine.

I think that this is what will contribute to long lasting success. I have been able to modify behaviour in the past in order to reach a goal. But then behaviour slowly and gradually reverts, the success is lost and I end up back where I was before because I was doing exactly what I was doing before. There was a preacher that said that. To go where you haven't gone, you have to do what you haven't done.

 

[jenanderson]

I've taken to dressing in my exercise clothing for doing the houseprojects. Including maintenance. Like cleaning. I haven't spent too much time on the scale. I'm more concerned with life change and realizing that I need a life style change, especially if I am to survive this move and not backtrack like we are so wont to do whenever we move. But I anticipate that whenever I do anything that remotely resembles exercise, I definitely THINK about it as exercise and pray that my body will respond accordingly.

I love this idea! I am beginning to feel like I spend most of my time in exercise clothes - so - wearing them while cleaning will work as well!

You read such great books and always make them sound so interesting. I might want to pick up a few of them. Right now I have started reading "Marathoning for Mortal" and it has been really interesting.

Your talk of decluttering and projects around the house have been inspiring me. Last weekend I did get my projects done and it felt great. I am already making my list for the next weekend!

Have a great night!
Jen

 

[TxRabbit]

Major breakthrough last night.

This week has been a really good week in terms of eating food from home. I sent DH to work with a lunch everyday, which was more difficult on some days than others, given our mornings. And dinners were all from home.

Now last night I think I might have gained some understanding. DH and I went to get the mail (we have a keyed central mailbox for our section of the neighborhood). In the mail is a postcard from Sonic with pictures of food that look really good. We commented to each other how good it looked. There were coupons on the post card. DH thought that he was being funny when he talked about going there to get some. Fine by me I said. I was tired. Didn't really know what we were doing for dinner. Didn't really feel like cooking either.

So we get back in the house and DS is playing his Lego Rock Band (which is a hoot btw). He really wanted to get to a certain point in his game. So we put off going. Meanwhile, I HAD figured out that we could have some pasta for dinner. I had a jar of sauce in the pantry. The water was on to boil.

Anyway. To cut this story short. Going out to dinner seemed like a hassle. DS didn't want to go. Could Daddy just go and bring it back? Um, no. Either we all go, or nothing. Well, in the end, when we didn't just stop the idea because we shouldn't, because it was eating out, because it wasn't the best food, etc etc, when we gave ourselves the freedom to make the choice and we really thought about it, we decided to just eat the boring noodles and jarred sauce. It was easier than going out to eat last night.

And we were all happy. We've tried to make decisions like this for all the right reasons. Really, it's not a decision, it's an automatic ruling. You CAN'T. Therefore you don't, but you still really wish that you did. And eventually, you do. There is nothing like telling yourself that you absolutely CAN'T to make you want to. Or that just me? And mine?

The big lesson learned here is this. When given the freedom to make decisions, rather than a forced decision, there is satisfaction in the result that is otherwise missing. I think this is why the WW points plans may be so popular. You get to keep making decisions. I don't really know much about it, just my impressions from what I have heard, but it seems to me that nothing is necessarily off limits, there are just consequences for the decisions that you make. They help you to understand the consequences of poor eating choices.

We are getting geared up to follow the Fat Flush Plan. I've been doing what I can to make it successful. We were successful once, but then every time after, we have failed. I don't want to fail this time, hence the whole gearing up to it and keeping this journal. I'm trying to understand what my personal deal with food is.

Or rather, the decisions related to food. Because I don't think it has to do with food at all. As last night will attest to. It has to do with being lazy, partly. If someone would've brought me Sonic, I totally would have eaten it. And it has to do with motivation. Rules are great when you can clearly remember WHY you made the rule. Like me and soda. I don't drink it. It's a given. I know why. But when you start to falter on they WHYs, then it becomes difficult to follow through.

So, before we get to the end of this weekend, and the likely being of our Fat Flush plan, I'm planning on writing down all the reasons WHY I want to do this. I think that I'll post it on the fridge, as much as I hate things posted to the fridge...so that I can see it and remember WHY I am doing what I am doing. I think this will keep me motivated to stick to the plan.

Speaking of...this fridge hasn't looked this empty in FOREVER. THe pantry too. The stuff is really getting cleared out. I think that in terms of food supply, we are really ready to pursue the plan also.

 

[bouncycat]

Hey Rabbit!! This is a very interesting perspective you've put on things. I see you haven't posted in a while, things going okay still? I did not know all that about calcium. That was VERY interesting. I think I'm addicted to sweets. That's my downfall. That and diet soda. I've been drinking alot of water lately, and limiting my diet soda to one or 2 a day, i was drinking up to 6 a day!!! Is tea any better? i know it has caffiene, but didn't know if it was any better ingredient wise. Keep up the good work. It's tough, I know, going thru my own battle right now. But, I'm doing good so far!!! Keep your goals in mind, and everything else will fall into place!!

 

[TxRabbit]

Hey Rabbit!! This is a very interesting perspective you've put on things. I see you haven't posted in a while, things going okay still? I did not know all that about calcium. That was VERY interesting. I think I'm addicted to sweets. That's my downfall. That and diet soda. I've been drinking alot of water lately, and limiting my diet soda to one or 2 a day, i was drinking up to 6 a day!!! Is tea any better? i know it has caffiene, but didn't know if it was any better ingredient wise. Keep up the good work. It's tough, I know, going thru my own battle right now. But, I'm doing good so far!!! Keep your goals in mind, and everything else will fall into place!!

Things are going "okay." We did some eating out on Super Bowl weekend. But the kitchen is back in business and this is a good thing. The house projects are taking full on top priority right now. They have to for the house to be ready for the market.

I'm glad that my thread was a good read.

IMO tea is better than soda. Soda is just ladden with chemicals. Tea may not be perfect. I don't know what they do to it to process it and put into the nice little baggies. But I do know that various different teas can be beneficial. Green tea, for instance, is a natural anti-oxidant. It is also a metabolism booster. If you can figure out a blend of green tea and something else, or a favored green tea, then it isn't as bitter and can be quite refreshing.

Other herbal teas can also have different positive effects on various organ functions, etc. There is whole line of teas called Traditional Medicinals that have tea blends that are supposed to support all kinds of things from digestive health to PMS to promoting better sleep, etc etc. Even regular black tea (I prefer mine with lemon) is better than soda. I prefer unsweetened tea for a nice no calorie drink. If you have to add sweetener, then you are adding calories. If you add a sweetener like honey, then you might get some allergen benefit (if it's a locally produced honey) which can help you not be as affected by seasonal allergies (if you are). I would avoid artificial sweeteners.

It is a battle. Right now, I feel like I am still just trying to get a thought process together to attack and go forward. I know that I'm tired of the back and forth. I'm ready to have it be a slower process and so I am willing to work through some other issues that I know have stood in the way of maintained progress in the past. This up and coming move has really got me thinking. In the past, all progress has been totally sabatoged by a move and I don't want that to happen this time. When I can take some time, I'm going to gather my thoughts on what's been going on...

Thanks for posting! It was nice to hear from someone.

 

[TxRabbit]

WOW. So I haven't been posting, but I have been serious in the preparation department. It has taken me a LONG time from the initial New Year's urge to get this program underway!

I've got my motivation HIGH!! How did I do it, you ask? I got my color's analyzed!

Anyone remember the whole Color Me Beautiful seasons? Your season determines which colors look really good on you...well, this stuff is still going on...and I found a guy that is EXCELLENT in analysis and has a slightly different classification system...if anyone is really interested in knowing more and talking about it, I'd love to chat about it, I might start a new thread on the topic...

The nitty gritty of it is that I have been picking the wrong color tones for the major of my life. No wonder I put a shirt on in the morning, I don't really like it. I take it off. I look for another shirt. I don't really like it. I take it off. All this time, I've been thinking that it is all weight related, but NO, it is COLOR related. Turns out I am something I never thought I could be, I am an EARTH, with warm, muted skin. I need to wear warm, muted colors.

The thing is that when you really study color, you find that there is a warm or cool version of every single one. And there is a muted or clear version of every one. It can be quite challenging to find the RIGHT color and the RIGHT fit. It sure makes shopping EASIER! I haven't spent too much, but I got a few new tops and two pants (on major clearances!! I got a long sleeve beautiful soft sweater for $5.97 at JCPenny!) and now, every time I see myself, I actually think I look GOOD!

Ok. So I need to lose some weight. I need to be more fit. Better nutrition. More strength. Yes, all that. But I am really excited to do it now because I already think I look pretty good...and I know that I am just going to FEEL really good with better health! Very exciting times!

And the other motivation is to help my DH. We finally found out that he doesn't have a total herniated disc. It is just to the point of bulging. Inflammation is what is causing the majority of pain. Muscle imbalance contributes. So here we go. Fat flush is an anti-inflammatory diet. And we can get started with some helpful exercises. Hopefully we can work together to help him out.

The big thing that I finally found for the whole CALCIUM situation...Bone Meal. I know. But, one rounded teaspoon of bone meal has 3000 mg of bioavailable calcium. Yeah! So I add one teaspoon to my frappe in the morning...which consists of the cranberry water, 1 scoop whey protein, 1 cup frozen berries (any), 1 tablespoon flax seed oil, 1 teaspoon bone meal, and 1 teaspoon Flora-Key (a pro-biotic). It's creamy goodness in a glass! And I'm not worried about my calcium intake any more.

So. This morning. I drank the nasty Long life cocktail. Cranberry water mixed with 1 teaspoon powdered wheat grass sick and 1 teaspoon Flora-Key. Thank goodness the Flora-key is also something of a sweetener, because wheat grass is DISGUSTING. Full of nutrients though...so hold your breath and chug!

Then I had my frappe (or smoothie). Took my CLA. Took my evening primrose oil.

Already I feel better. I'm doing something very positive for me. It feels that way too. It's not punishment because I let myself go. Which is how I have thought about it in the past. New mindset helps. I hope to keep it up!!

 

[TxRabbit]

Yesterday was a successful Fat Flush day!

For morning snack I had 2 hard boiled eggs. An interesting thing about eggs. Ever heard of oxidized cholesterol? Your body doesn't have receptors for cholesterol, but it does for oxidized cholesterol, which is the problem cholesterol. You can limit the amount of oxidized cholesterol by keeping your egg yolks unbroken for cooking, so hard-boiled or poached is better IF you are trying to eat in a way to reduce inflammation.

For lunch I had a salad with cucumbers, apples, and tuna with the Lime-Cilantro dressing from Rick Bayless' Everyday Mexican. Also have of a baked sweet potato.

Afternoon snack was a bunch of veggies.

Dinner was Grilled Roadside Chicken from Everyday Mexican, grilled asparagus, and a kind of cole slaw made with green and red cabbage, green onions, cilantro, and kale and dressed with the Salsa Dressing from the same book.

DH and I split another frappe for a dessert.

Drinking drink the cranwater all day though. But drank more water than I have been lately.

So today, DH and I got up and did:
Longlife cocktail
Lemon tea toddies
And he got a frappe before leaving for work.

I'll get mine in just a few minutes.

I'm really enjoying Rick Bayless' Everyday Mexican. It's fun to get a cookbook from the library and play with the recipes. I also got a book called The Balanced Plate and it has some really great Fat Flush friendly recipes. Some are really weird...but they have been good. I made some sauted greens from it and it was actually really good and I couldn't ever say that I actually ENJOYED greens before.

I bought DH and I each one of those exercise balls. I read that it is supposed to be really good for circulating his spine to bounce gently on the ball for 5 minutes. Circulation in the spine being a key factor for healing. I got an exercise DVD and resistance bands with one of the balls. So the balls and some yoga are going to become a part of the routine. It's too bad it is still so cold, I don't really like doing yoga in the cold.