My cousin is stealing my baby name...my first rant

[Alice's Mom]

I'm not pregnant and I might not ever have more kids, but still, it doesn't seem very nice.

My cousin is pregnant and asked me what my baby names were when I was expecting, not thinking much of it I told her that I have always planned on naming a boy after our Great Grandfather who I was very close to, I still remembered how excited my G-Grandfather was when I told him he might have a namesake. Sadly he has sinced passed away. She decided that its a great name and now using it. I guess I'm glad that his name will be passed along, but I really hope she ends up having a girl!

Another blow is our Aunt called her and said I hope you are having a girl, I don't have anyone to buy girl clothes for...um, hello! I can't have gotten lost in the shuffle, I am the only one with a kid right now, a girl at that. I send pictures and call they know she exists.

I feel dumb for feeling left out, and I realize the selfishness I am displaying about the name, but I can't help it.

Thank you community board for being a place to vent.

 

[Mimi Q]

 

[BuckNaked]

Is the aunt you mention the mother of this cousin? If so, I can understand why she would say that.

 

[Mermaid02]

What's the name? Good luck!

 

[Cindyluwho]

Please don't let it stop you from using the name. My Grandma Amelia/Amy (94 and still going strong) has at least 1/2 dozen great-grandbabies named after her. My cousin & I are only 4 years apart and we have the same name. It's all good!

 

[Alice's Mom]

Is the aunt you mention the mother of this cousin? If so, I can understand why she would say that.

Nope she is our great aunt, our Grandmothers sister...

 

[Alice's Mom]

Please don't let it stop you from using the name. My Grandma Amelia/Amy (94 and still going strong) has at least 1/2 dozen great-grandbabies named after her. My cousin & I are only 4 years apart and we have the same name. It's all good!

The name is Carson, the plan was Carson Owen, Owen being my other Grandfather. My family on my Dad's side after this new baby is born will be only 15 people, I might still use it one day as a middle name, maybe switch the names around. I guess I always hoped I would have more kids and use the name that meant a lot to me.

Thanks for the hugs!

 

[Mom2Em]

Well I for one see nothing selfish in your reaction... Here's hoping your cousin has a girl...

 

[Mermaid02]

The name is Carson, the plan was Carson Owen, Owen being my other Grandfather. My family on my Dad's side after this new baby is born will be only 15 people, I might still use it one day as a middle name, maybe switch the names around. I guess I always hoped I would have more kids and use the name that meant a lot to me.

Thanks for the hugs!

That's a great name- I hope she doesn't use it. I like Owen for a first name too!

 

[kpm76]

Awww, you're not selfish, I know exactly how you feel. DH and I don't have kids yet but my immediate family knows that I have always loved the name Jack. When my SIL was expecting a few years ago, she found out she was having a boy. One day we were visiting and we asked what names they had in mind and guess what she said? Jack. When DH and I left, I got teary eyed. Don't know why...the name has no special significance but I just liked it and my SIL knew that. DH was really sweet....he kept telling me he wasn't crazy about the name anyway (even though I knew that was not really true)....just trying to make me feel better. I think I was more hurt than anything. I felt like she was doing it on purpose as opposed to actually liking the name. Well, in the end she did not name her son Jack but kept us all in suspense until the end. She said they had picked a name but were not telling anyone until he was born....obviously it was her perogative.

 

[Keggy]

Well I for one see nothing selfish in your reaction... Here's hoping your cousin has a girl...

I totally agree!

Kelly

 

[Stacerita]

I would be irritated with my cousin too if she did that to me. I made sure I kept the sweetpea's name underwraps till the very end for that same reason. Especially since my SIL and I were due around the same time. We had both planned on incorporating my grandparents names into the names of the first great grandchildren. I had mine first and used what I wanted. She had a boy so it worked out in the end. But if she stole my name I would be ticked to say the least.

I got one even worse that a cousin stealing a name. My friend just got a dog and named it Isabella. Nice. Except that her DIL told her that if her next one is a girl, thats the name they want to use. Now the DIL can't use it since its the dogs name. Kinda rude I thought.

 

[Serena]

I'd use the name anyway when the time comes.

 

[canwegosoon]

My sister did the same exact thing ...Took my favorite name...after telling her it was Grace...(So never tell anyone your favorite names)...but I ended up having boys.

 

[DisneyDotty]

I agree with going with the name anyway, when the time comes. In my family "Jakob" is used again and again and again--after my grandfather. And everyone spells it with a "K" because my grandfather did. I figure Grandpa is smiling down from heaven at all his legacies running around!

 

[minkydog]

I don't get the whole "stealing names" tantrum If the name is important to you, use it anyway. It's not like nobody is ever gonna use that name again. When my DS was born we named him John. My sister was a little miffed because they wanted to use that name(her hubby is John.) Hooookay... She had two boys, named them both John and now their credit is forever destined to be entwined. BTW, the only Carson i know is a girl

 

[Nicolepa]

Use it anyway. My best friend just had a baby, and she named him the same as my son (who's 3). We live less than a mile apart and she is like a second mom to my son (he actually prefers her over me LOL). At first I was very surprised, but it's a family name for both of our families so why shouldn't she? Just because I was able to get pg first doesn't mean she shouldn't get to use the name too.

My rule is if you don't want to feel that the name was "stolen" then you shouldn't tell it to anyone.

 

[CEDmom]

I guess I can see where you'd be upset but did you ask her to please not use that name and explain why it was so important to you? We have a lot of repeats in my family so I don't think cousins with the same name is that big of a deal. I actually like the way Owen Carson flows than Carson Owen but that's just my opinion.

 

[Tigger&Belle]

I can understand feeling a little hurt, but I wouldn't be real offended. My neice and I both liked the name Jacob. I had my Jacob first and then 5 months later she had hers. We do not live near each other, but even if we had of I wouldn't have cared. It gets a little dicey when the kids are close in age, have the same last name, and live near each other, but that's often not the case. And even if it is then maybe different nicknames can be chosen. BTW, my Jacob goes bt Jake and my neice's by Jacob.

 

[Chipperdini]

It would be impolite of me to inquire your age, but I will assume you're at least in your 20's.

my first rant

You must have the maturity of a saint!