My child used to believe......

[Mickeypooh99]

When my niece was little she saw my DH outside waxing the car, and she asked me what that green stuff was. I told her it was turtle wax. She said "oh, to keep all the turtles off the car!" I just smiled and told her yep, thats what its for.

 

[LynnTH]

Ok - I'll jump in. I could swear when I was little that I saw the Tidy Bowl Man in our toilet and that he was singing. (I don't know why no one believed me??)

 

[texasthumper]

When I was little, our local college had something called the annual "round-up" and it was a really big deal. The college owned some land outside of town and the students built a western-themed "set" and performed western style skits and musical numbers. They also had food and games, etc. I loved it of course and a year was a very long time to wait in between.

My mother told me one day that we were going to the "round-up" at the elementary school and I was so very happy and excited for days! Imagine my disappointment when all we did was sit in the cafeteria while my mother filled out registration forms so that I could start to school in the fall.

I also was jealous of the kids who got to attend the nursery school named "Kiddy Kollege." I thought they actually got to go the local college every day while I had to sit in Mrs. McCray's boring school.

Loving all these stories!

 

[Daisybelle]

When I was 4 my ornery older brothers dared me to watch an old Dracula movie with them, so of course I watched it! It scared the bajeebus out of me, naturally, but I thought I had it all figured out! In the parts I remembered, Dracula always bit people when they were sleeping. And they were always laying on their backs with their hands folded across their stomach. Aha! I figured that if I always slept on my side he couldn't get me! I don't think I was able to lay on my back until I was 13.

 

[FergieTCat]

I believed (because my mother told me so and she NEVER lied to me) that there was a little man who lived in the dishwasher. And if I didn't unload the dishes fast enough, he would start throwing them at me.

 

[Pooh's Pixie]

I believed (because my mother told me so and she NEVER lied to me) that there was a little man who lived in the dishwasher. And if I didn't unload the dishes fast enough, he would start throwing them at me.

This is my favorite! Very clever Mother!

 

[Katieinwonderland]

I believed everything my parents told me - and my mom totally lied to me!!!

When I wanted to stay up later, she would tell me the whole world went to bed at my bedtime. The whole world just shut down and went to bed at 8 in the evening! I believed that for ages until one night I woke up around 11 with stomachache and was so mad that my parents were still awake!

My mom also told me that my brain was made of vegetables and if I didn't eat enough of them, my brain wouldn't grow big and I wouldn't be smart! I have to say, I have always loved veggies and eat tons of them even now!

She told me that when the ice cream truck played music, it meant they were all out of ice cream. You know when I figured out this wasn't true? IN COLLEGE!!! We were in the dorm room when we heard the ice cream truck and my friend said "oh I'll run down and get us all ice cream!" and my response was "no, when they play music, they're all out!" My friends never let me live that one down!

 

[AJ12345]

She told me that when the ice cream truck played music, it meant they were all out of ice cream. You know when I figured out this wasn't true? IN COLLEGE!!! We were in the dorm room when we heard the ice cream truck and my friend said "oh I'll run down and get us all ice cream!" and my response was "no, when they play music, they're all out!" My friends never let me live that one down!

you owe me a new monitor. i just spit my soda all over it.

i didn't know you had to pay off credit cards until i was about 8 or 9. whenever my parents wouldn't buy me something, I'd tell them to pay with their credit card. i always thought they were insane for paying anything in cash.

 

[NeverlandClub23]

I don't have any children but I used to believe there was a "right" side to put peanut butter and jelly on. If I got my sandwich and the peanut butter was on the bottom I would say it wasn't made right. My Mom would say "Tough, eat it anyway". My Dad would go back in the kitchen and flip the sandwich over (I always thought he was remaking it ) and bring it back a few minutes later. Peanut Butter was to be on top and jelly the bottom.

My Dad also told me once that if you closed your eyes and held a white puffy dandelion (the one you can blow the seeds off of) and sang this little song and made a wish, opened your eyes, and blew the seeds, your wish would come true. I did what he said and halfway through my song he pushed my hand forward and the dandelion went in my mouth and all of the seeds came apart in my mouth. I was so naive.

 

[Handbag Lady]

I thought everyone had a Disneyland they could just drive to, just like we did. I thought the hotels around Disneyland were for men who travelled for work, and they just happened to have a lot of meetings near DL, for some reason.

I also thought that if I tried, I could stand on my tip-toes and see the Disneyland fireworks. (We lived in Wilmington, CA, so that is just not possible, but we were about 25-30 minutes away from the park.)

I also never understood why people had to involve airplanes to see their grandparents. Mine just lived less than a mile away, and I knew all four of mine for most of my childhood. In books, we'd read where someone picked up their grandparent from the airport and it puzzled me to no end. Why not just ride your bike to their house?

 

[KAMLEM]

I used to tell my DD that I had eyes in the back of my head and she believed me. I would catch her staring at the back of my head trying to find them. She's 13 now so she knows better, but she says she used to try so hard to see them!

 

[AshleyW]

I'll admit one that I used to believe, and it's even Disney related.

When I was little (4 or 5), I had no real concept of "distance". I knew Disney World was in Florida, but I didn't really get how far away Florida was from Iowa. So, in Cedar Rapids, there is an ADM Corn Sweeteners plant right by a main highway. To get to my grandma's house every weekend, we'd take this highway that passed by the plant. Here's a picture of what the plant looks like:

It's hard to tell from the picture, but that half-circle shaped building is actually dimpled... I used to think it was the Epcot ball. Every time we drove past it, I'd get so mad that we couldn't stop and play at Disney!

 

[castmemberb4]

My older sisters tell me I couldn't wait to turn 3 so I could get on my tricycle and go anywhere I wanted.

Our Goddaugher who called us Uncle P*** and Aunt L*** was 16 when she realized that we're not her real Aunt & Uncle !

 

[CDoobee]

When my DD was little and riding in a car seat, it never dawned on me that she couldn't see straight out the window, only up toward the trees. This was in the days when most (or all?) gas stations were full-serve and they even washed your windows! She asked me one day how rubbing gasoline on the windows made the car go. I was so confused, until I realized that she'd hear me say that we need gas, then we'd go to the station, and all she could ever see was the attendant wiping the windows!

I am another one who used to think all cats were girls and all dogs were boys. However, I knew that our dog was a girl. I don't know what I thought about that!

 

[Disneycrazy!!]

I used to think my toys came alive after bedtime and played and talked to each other.

My mom used to tell us that gum was fiberglass and if we swallowed it, it will cut our stomach to pieces. Never dawned on us, when we chewed it, it didn't cut our mouth...but I believed my mom like The waterboy believed in his momma! LOL LOL

.

 

[GAGirlInVA]

I used to believe there were munchkins in the three hole punch that ate all the dots. LOL

My sitter told us that if you unscrew your belly button that your arms and legs would fall off. So I never, ever would let anyone touch my belly button.

 

[tiff211]

When I was very young, I used to think that all cats were girls and all dogs were boys.

I thought the same thing!

 

[tiff211]

My daughter thought ducks said "Aflac"

 

[PrincessKsMom]

Two funeral related ones: my great grandmother passed away when I was young -- maybe 4 or so. When we got to the funeral parlor my mom told me to go up to great grandpa and say sorry. I started crying and begging and swearing that I hadn't killed her, so I wasn't going to say I was sorry.

Took my DD to a neighbor's mom's funeral. Again she was probably about 4 or 5. Every time we'd walk passed the funeral parlor after, she's always say "Hey, that's where Jerry's mom lives!"

Reading AshleyW's post brought another one to mind: for some reason I used to believe Vietnam was behind our local Two Guys store/new mall they were building (I live in NJ). My mom would say we were going to the mall and I'd say "yep, in Vietnam".

 

[SDFgirl]

Growing up, I played with my cousins a lot. I knew that they were MY cousins, but I remember how shocked I was when someone told me that I was also THEIR cousin! It never dawned on me until then that I was someone's cousin too.

I also thought ice cream cones were made out of wood...so I'd eat all the ice cream and give my mom the wooden cone to eat!

And my mom would tell me that if I walked on her just-mopped floor, that my feet would burn off!