jsmla
DIS Veteran
- Joined
- Mar 19, 2001
- Messages
- 4,498
I'm so excited! Tonight we're going on our first ever Illuminations Cruise! 
We've both seen Illuminations many, many times but we've never had what you'd call a front row seat. No, wait, I forgot. We did once have a waterside table at the Rose and Crown, but that one doesn't count. I made the reservations way in advance and we had a great table, a wonderful view. We also had two young children. That's how we found out Lizzie (our youngest, then 4) was afraid of fireworks. I guess I should have said that Scott and DS had a wonderful view. Liz and I had a view of the Rose and Crown ladies room. As for the other times, my kids aren't built for holding down a good spot for two hours. They're hip 21st century-type people. They expect instant gratification. These kids think they're suffering when they have to use a dial-up modem. Even now, I'd like to see you get Sam and Liz to patiently wait around two hours for anything. Let's see you get them to do it for 15 minutes. Come on, I dare you.
That's okay, the kids are almost all grown up now. They can stay back in Baton Rouge and spend their time listening to their I-Pods while they talk on their cell phones while they IM their friends on the computer while they are waching MTV. In case you don't have teenagers of your own this is also known as doing your homework. It's also one of the many reasons I need to skip town every so often.
I didn't book this cruise myself. I got our spots through a post on the DISboards. This was quite a daring thing for me to do. I'd never done business with an individual over the internet before. To be honest I was more than a little worried over whether or not we would actually have a spot on the boat when we got there. Turns out I wasn't the one who should have been worried.
We (read I) decided that we'd have an early dinner before our cruise. I'd read that the Pepper Market at the Coronado Springs was a good place to use one of our Q&C vouchers so we decided to give it a go. Scott and I split the Sampler platter at the Wok station and a fruit tart. This was plenty of food but it was only so-so. I find most of the hotel food court-type food too bland for my taste.
We're way early for our cruise and need to fill some time. Liz and I are planning a mother/daughter trip this summer and, unless money starts falling out out of the sky, we'll be staying at a Value. I want to check out Pop Century.
Boy is this place busy! People everywhere! Lines at the check-in, lines at the food court, MOBS at the bus stop. I'm afraid I'm already spoiled by the quiet at POFQ. Is there such a thing as a moderate snob? Scott and I walk around the resort. It's better away from the main building. Liz would probably enjoy the 70's section. She thinks my high school pictures are a hoot. To her 1978 might as well be 1878, just some far-off period from the remote past when people dressed funny. It's extremely wierd to see your memories translated into pop culture icons.
We park the car at the Yacht Club, another fancy place. Still plenty of time so we walk over and gawk at the Beach Club. I like this resort better than the YC. It feels friendlier, not as stuffy. You'd have to see the gingerbread carousel to believe it. Words fail me. The pool is to DIE for. It takes us several minutes just to stroll the walkway along one side of it. Okay, time for another fantasy revision. I win the lottery, Scott retires, we pay off all the bills and have enough money left to spend a week at the Polynesian AND a week at the Beach Club.
Still too early. Noone's around at the marina so we wait and wait and wait. Like I said before, I have internet trust issues and all this waiting isn't doing them any good. We're supposed to be meeting up with Eric, the guy who booked the cruise, and a fairly large family group. I don't see anyone who'd fit either of those descriptions. In my heart of hearts I believe that Eric is either a.) fictitious or b.) sitting on one of the hotel balconies, watching us and laughing.
Still waiting. Alone now. Scott has gone off to use the fancy potty at the Yacht Club. A family group shows up and I eagerly accost them. No, they're not sharing a cruise (and if they were it wouldn't be with you, crazy all alone lady.) I return to my bench and search the crowd of passers-by for suitable candidates. Next time I'm bringing a sign.
Still waiting. I can't stand it. I jump up from my bench and start to pace the marina. The not-sharing-a-cruise family eyes me warily. They're afraid of the crazy all alone lady. A couple of kids are also standing on the dock, waiting for their parents I presume.
Waiting, waiting, waiting. Still alone. (One day I'm going to find out exactly what it is that Scott does in the bathroom.) I begin to eavesdrop on the conversations around me. The frightened family is celebrating a birthday. One of the waiting-for-his parents kids is talking about the Animal Kingdom. One of the waiting-for-his-parents kids works at the Animal Kingdom. Wait a minute, Eric works at the Animal Kingdom! It's him! He does exist! He's really, really young. Not much older than Sam. I feel so old. I walk up and introduce myself. I think he's as relieved to see me as I am him. It seems that the rest of his group has bailed. Without paying.
**********************RANT ALERT**************************
To: Mr. No Show:
What a crummy thing to do! There were lots of posts on the DIS by people looking for a cruise that week. Eric could have filled his boat several times over. What kind of person bespeaks half a boat and then doesn't show, doesn't call, doesn't pay? I don't hope you have a good excuse because that would mean something bad had happened to you. Still, I hope you feel awful about sticking it to a college kid trying to survive on the pittance Disney probably pays.
**********************RANT OVER***************************
Scott finally shows and we all wait around a little longer. The other boats are loading up to leave and Scott and I are having a whispered conversation about Eric's plight. Okay, agreed. If the others don't show we'll pay for half. Meanwhile stray groups of other people are drifting up to the marina. We know they don't have a boat because all of the other boats have left. Prince Charming once again disappears and returns in the form of TA DAAA!
The Boat Pimp.
The Boat Pimp is on a mission. Fill that sucker or die trying. Did I mention that the Boat Pimp is in sales? He can cold call with the best of them. The first group is coy. Maybe they will, maybe they won't. The Boat Pimp tells them how great it's going to be. (For the record the Boat Pimp has never been on an Illuminations Cruise, is fairly indifferent to fireworks and not real fond of boats.) The rest of us stand to the side and try to look harmless.
We get turned down.
The second group is more promising. This group thought they had a cruise booked. The concierge at their resort told them they did. A trusting group, this. The Boat Pimp has something to work with. He really turns it on. You poor guys. The concierge really did y'all wrong. How sad to anticipate the joys of an Illuminations cruise and then be so cruelly disappointed. Maybe he can help. His good buddy Eric over there has a boat and is willing to share. How convenient. And such a bargain! I ably second him. The second group bites. The Boat Pimp's work here is done. He turns them over to Eric to deal with all the sordid financial details.
The skipper's name is Scott (not my Scott, another one). He takes us on a little tour of the waterways of the Boardwalk/MGM/Epcot area. It's fun passing the poor plebians on the resort boats. They may have a room at the Yacht Club but I have a boat. NaNaNaNaNaNa!
I don't know how Captain Scott manages but we get a great spot even though we're one of the last boats to arrive. He explains the storyline of Illuminations to us. Neato. I didn't even know there was a story. I always thought it was just some random fireworks. Scott (the skipper one, not the Boat Pimp) has perfect timing. Within minutes of our arrival the lights dim and a hush falls over the World Showcase........
WOW! This is just great! I can't believe I've never bothered to watch Illuminations properly before. You mean there's pictures on the big ball in the lake? Cool. The new group won't join us in the front of the boat so Scott and I have one whole side to ourselves. I perch at the very front and just drink it all in. This is just way cool.
Illuminations is over far too soon. Illuminations lasts about half as long when you watch it from a boat as it does from the back of the crowd in front of China. After the show Captain Scott takes us on a short tour of the World Showcase by water. This would have been very romantic if I could have convinced the other 7 people to swim back to the marina.
It was still very pretty and Captain Scott gets an extra tip from the Boat Pimp.
I highly recommend the Illuminations Cruise to everyone with just a couple of caveats.
1. If you're sharing your cruise make sure you get the cash in advance.
2. If you're meeting up with strangers bring a sign.
The Boat Pimp's services are extra.
Jennifer
We've both seen Illuminations many, many times but we've never had what you'd call a front row seat. No, wait, I forgot. We did once have a waterside table at the Rose and Crown, but that one doesn't count. I made the reservations way in advance and we had a great table, a wonderful view. We also had two young children. That's how we found out Lizzie (our youngest, then 4) was afraid of fireworks. I guess I should have said that Scott and DS had a wonderful view. Liz and I had a view of the Rose and Crown ladies room. As for the other times, my kids aren't built for holding down a good spot for two hours. They're hip 21st century-type people. They expect instant gratification. These kids think they're suffering when they have to use a dial-up modem. Even now, I'd like to see you get Sam and Liz to patiently wait around two hours for anything. Let's see you get them to do it for 15 minutes. Come on, I dare you.That's okay, the kids are almost all grown up now. They can stay back in Baton Rouge and spend their time listening to their I-Pods while they talk on their cell phones while they IM their friends on the computer while they are waching MTV. In case you don't have teenagers of your own this is also known as doing your homework. It's also one of the many reasons I need to skip town every so often.
I didn't book this cruise myself. I got our spots through a post on the DISboards. This was quite a daring thing for me to do. I'd never done business with an individual over the internet before. To be honest I was more than a little worried over whether or not we would actually have a spot on the boat when we got there. Turns out I wasn't the one who should have been worried.
We (read I) decided that we'd have an early dinner before our cruise. I'd read that the Pepper Market at the Coronado Springs was a good place to use one of our Q&C vouchers so we decided to give it a go. Scott and I split the Sampler platter at the Wok station and a fruit tart. This was plenty of food but it was only so-so. I find most of the hotel food court-type food too bland for my taste.
We're way early for our cruise and need to fill some time. Liz and I are planning a mother/daughter trip this summer and, unless money starts falling out out of the sky, we'll be staying at a Value. I want to check out Pop Century.
Boy is this place busy! People everywhere! Lines at the check-in, lines at the food court, MOBS at the bus stop. I'm afraid I'm already spoiled by the quiet at POFQ. Is there such a thing as a moderate snob? Scott and I walk around the resort. It's better away from the main building. Liz would probably enjoy the 70's section. She thinks my high school pictures are a hoot. To her 1978 might as well be 1878, just some far-off period from the remote past when people dressed funny. It's extremely wierd to see your memories translated into pop culture icons.
We park the car at the Yacht Club, another fancy place. Still plenty of time so we walk over and gawk at the Beach Club. I like this resort better than the YC. It feels friendlier, not as stuffy. You'd have to see the gingerbread carousel to believe it. Words fail me. The pool is to DIE for. It takes us several minutes just to stroll the walkway along one side of it. Okay, time for another fantasy revision. I win the lottery, Scott retires, we pay off all the bills and have enough money left to spend a week at the Polynesian AND a week at the Beach Club.
Still too early. Noone's around at the marina so we wait and wait and wait. Like I said before, I have internet trust issues and all this waiting isn't doing them any good. We're supposed to be meeting up with Eric, the guy who booked the cruise, and a fairly large family group. I don't see anyone who'd fit either of those descriptions. In my heart of hearts I believe that Eric is either a.) fictitious or b.) sitting on one of the hotel balconies, watching us and laughing.
Still waiting. Alone now. Scott has gone off to use the fancy potty at the Yacht Club. A family group shows up and I eagerly accost them. No, they're not sharing a cruise (and if they were it wouldn't be with you, crazy all alone lady.) I return to my bench and search the crowd of passers-by for suitable candidates. Next time I'm bringing a sign.
Still waiting. I can't stand it. I jump up from my bench and start to pace the marina. The not-sharing-a-cruise family eyes me warily. They're afraid of the crazy all alone lady. A couple of kids are also standing on the dock, waiting for their parents I presume.
Waiting, waiting, waiting. Still alone. (One day I'm going to find out exactly what it is that Scott does in the bathroom.) I begin to eavesdrop on the conversations around me. The frightened family is celebrating a birthday. One of the waiting-for-his parents kids is talking about the Animal Kingdom. One of the waiting-for-his-parents kids works at the Animal Kingdom. Wait a minute, Eric works at the Animal Kingdom! It's him! He does exist! He's really, really young. Not much older than Sam. I feel so old. I walk up and introduce myself. I think he's as relieved to see me as I am him. It seems that the rest of his group has bailed. Without paying.
**********************RANT ALERT**************************
To: Mr. No Show:
What a crummy thing to do! There were lots of posts on the DIS by people looking for a cruise that week. Eric could have filled his boat several times over. What kind of person bespeaks half a boat and then doesn't show, doesn't call, doesn't pay? I don't hope you have a good excuse because that would mean something bad had happened to you. Still, I hope you feel awful about sticking it to a college kid trying to survive on the pittance Disney probably pays.
**********************RANT OVER***************************
Scott finally shows and we all wait around a little longer. The other boats are loading up to leave and Scott and I are having a whispered conversation about Eric's plight. Okay, agreed. If the others don't show we'll pay for half. Meanwhile stray groups of other people are drifting up to the marina. We know they don't have a boat because all of the other boats have left. Prince Charming once again disappears and returns in the form of TA DAAA!
The Boat Pimp.
The Boat Pimp is on a mission. Fill that sucker or die trying. Did I mention that the Boat Pimp is in sales? He can cold call with the best of them. The first group is coy. Maybe they will, maybe they won't. The Boat Pimp tells them how great it's going to be. (For the record the Boat Pimp has never been on an Illuminations Cruise, is fairly indifferent to fireworks and not real fond of boats.) The rest of us stand to the side and try to look harmless.
We get turned down.The second group is more promising. This group thought they had a cruise booked. The concierge at their resort told them they did. A trusting group, this. The Boat Pimp has something to work with. He really turns it on. You poor guys. The concierge really did y'all wrong. How sad to anticipate the joys of an Illuminations cruise and then be so cruelly disappointed. Maybe he can help. His good buddy Eric over there has a boat and is willing to share. How convenient. And such a bargain! I ably second him. The second group bites. The Boat Pimp's work here is done. He turns them over to Eric to deal with all the sordid financial details.
The skipper's name is Scott (not my Scott, another one). He takes us on a little tour of the waterways of the Boardwalk/MGM/Epcot area. It's fun passing the poor plebians on the resort boats. They may have a room at the Yacht Club but I have a boat. NaNaNaNaNaNa!
I don't know how Captain Scott manages but we get a great spot even though we're one of the last boats to arrive. He explains the storyline of Illuminations to us. Neato. I didn't even know there was a story. I always thought it was just some random fireworks. Scott (the skipper one, not the Boat Pimp) has perfect timing. Within minutes of our arrival the lights dim and a hush falls over the World Showcase........
WOW! This is just great! I can't believe I've never bothered to watch Illuminations properly before. You mean there's pictures on the big ball in the lake? Cool. The new group won't join us in the front of the boat so Scott and I have one whole side to ourselves. I perch at the very front and just drink it all in. This is just way cool.
Illuminations is over far too soon. Illuminations lasts about half as long when you watch it from a boat as it does from the back of the crowd in front of China. After the show Captain Scott takes us on a short tour of the World Showcase by water. This would have been very romantic if I could have convinced the other 7 people to swim back to the marina.
It was still very pretty and Captain Scott gets an extra tip from the Boat Pimp. I highly recommend the Illuminations Cruise to everyone with just a couple of caveats.
1. If you're sharing your cruise make sure you get the cash in advance.
2. If you're meeting up with strangers bring a sign.
The Boat Pimp's services are extra.
Jennifer
