Money spending - 3rd grade UPDATE on first post

[luvsJack]

The fact is that there is no reason to ask for a family's personal information for an assigment. Unless maybe you are doing a family tree or something of that nature and even then you have to be very careful.

For a math assignment, there should be fictional situations designed to complete the assignment. No one needs to know how much someone spent on school supplies (maybe they were donated?) or how much a person spends on groceries. Even if the assignment WAS about money and budgeting, there is no reason why they need actual amounts from anyone.

The teacher should always (not just now) take into consideration that she/he does not know what that child goes home to every night and should not ask questions that the family could, in any way, feel uncomfortable answering.

I would just make up answers and leave it at that.

 

[ccgirl]

I am a bit frustrated today. Not exactly sure how to feel about my 3rd graders homework.

First of all we are struggling with money woes beyond anything that I could ever imagine. DH's job was eliminated due to poor ecomony 17 months ago. He finally started a new job this month....no pay until 30th, and has taken a 75+% pay cut. I have been applying for jobs ever since he lost his job, with part time work heree & there.

This month has been extremely difficult. I had garage sale to buy groceries, Craigslist items, etc. Still not sure how going to pay water bill.

So, the homeworks is to "interview a family member" for their MONEY unit starting next week.
Question #1. About how much do you spend on groceries per month for your family?
#2. About how many miles do you drive back & forth to work?
#3. About how much do you spend on gas for travel per week?
#4. About how much do you spend on school supplies for your child(ren)?
#5. About how much do you spend eating at fast food or restaurants during the week?
#6. Does your child earn allowance for the week or month? If yes, do they save their money?

So.....we are a family of 7, DH & I with 5 kids.

1. Well I said we had a garage sale and rolled our all change to buy groceries.
2. We can answer now, but what a nice reminder that "Mommy and Daddy did not have jobs!!
3. Again, I have been scraping money for gas....used $10 per day for last 3 days because I do not have enough each day to fill tank.
4. With 5 children and not a lot of money.... nice reminder again of how much we are going without....I bought the min. and thankfully had stuff left over from last year.
5. Eat out........hahaha that hasn't happened for months.
6. Sorry no allowance (I actually have borrowed money from my boys birthday money).

I know this is a school learning moment about Money, but in these times, in our county high of unemployment, it is really sad that this is school assignment.
Could they not have used a ficticious family to do the unit.
I certainly cannot answer these questions as I wish to........DD knows the truth.
Sadly she came home with info about a field trip and asked if $15 was too much and she might not be able to go. "No honey, mommy will take care of it".

Does anyone else feel that this is just not the right time for such "interviews" and info for school assignments?

So sorry for you. I wouldn't have gotten into specifics. When I was laid off, I did not let my DD7 know too much. She doesn't need the added stress. I remember when I was growing up my mom always would tell me the money woes and I swore I wouldn't do that to my kids. I would have answered the following...

Question #1. About how much do you spend on groceries per month for your family? I would have given the dollar amount not how I paid for them.
#2. About how many miles do you drive back & forth to work? I would have said 0 because I work from home.
#3. About how much do you spend on gas for travel per week? You said you used $10 per day for 3 days so that answer would be $30.
#4. About how much do you spend on school supplies for your child(ren)?
I would have given the actual dollar amount
#5. About how much do you spend eating at fast food or restaurants during the week? Again, 0 would be fine. We like to save money and eat at home.
#6. Does your child earn allowance for the week or month? If yes, do they save their money? No here would be fine too.
Personally, I don't believe in allowance unless my DD goes above and beyond. I teach her about money and budgeting. She will get money from special occasions. I pay for her extra curricular activities and all that other stuff.
OP - I consider it a great feat saving money and being frugal. I would be proud to say I only spent $2 on supplies as opposed to someone else that spent $20. Take it as a compliment that you can be frugal and get your family by.

I am so sorry you are going thru this. It will get better. As far as $$ for field trips; can you ask the school? I know at my DD's school there is a fund that can be used for parents that can't afford the field trips. Look into food pantries to help with groceries. I volunteer at my local pantry and no income verification is needed. That may help to free up some money for the water bill or whatever else you may need. Good luck.

 

[Kate and Pete]

Forgot to mention....

High schooler needs $13 tomorrow to register to take the PSAT. I am going to call school tomorrow morning to see if they will "hold" a check until the 30th.

Not sure what else to do.

Call the guidance office and ask if they have "scholarship money" available for PSAT registration. Many do!! Good luck!

 

[ShannonMB]

While the teacher may not share the information, kids at that age will often share it amongst themselves, without realizing what the consequences may be. Even though teachers do not share with the class who got an F on the test, all the kids somehow know within 2 minutes of hitting the playground at recess...

Totally. Also, since when are homework assignments confidential, protected information? When I was in school (a while ago, granted), we would hand our papers to the kid behind us to grade (spelling tests and such). For all we know, the teacher was planning on having each kid take a turn going up to the board and plotting their family's monthly grocery budget on a graph. No way to know. Even if there was no outright teasing involved, I'm sure there would be a kid or 2 in the class who would say something like, "Wow, you NEVER get to go out to eat, how sad". That's enough to make a 3rd grader cry, IMHO. Totally unnecessary.

OP, I think you are justified in feeling the assignment is nosy and inappropriate, and I am glad you are comfortable enough with the teacher to let her know.

 

[MomToOne]

II wouldn't have gotten into specifics. When I was laid off, I did not let my DD7 know too much. She doesn't need the added stress. I remember when I was growing up my mom always would tell me the money woes and I swore I wouldn't do that to my kids. I would have answered the following...

Question #1. About how much do you spend on groceries per month for your family? I would have given the dollar amount not how I paid for them.
#2. About how many miles do you drive back & forth to work? I would have said 0 because I work from home.
#3. About how much do you spend on gas for travel per week? You said you used $10 per day for 3 days so that answer would be $30.
#4. About how much do you spend on school supplies for your child(ren)?
I would have given the actual dollar amount
#5. About how much do you spend eating at fast food or restaurants during the week? Again, 0 would be fine. We like to save money and eat at home.
#6. Does your child earn allowance for the week or month? If yes, do they save their money? No here would be fine too.
Personally, I don't believe in allowance unless my DD goes above and beyond. I teach her about money and budgeting. She will get money from special occasions. I pay for her extra curricular activities and all that other stuff.
OP - I consider it a great feat saving money and being frugal. I would be proud to say I only spent $2 on supplies as opposed to someone else that spent $20. Take it as a compliment that you can be frugal and get your family by.

Again - for those not reading the whole thread - the OP has said these were NOT the answers she gave, she was just venting in her post.

 

[hambirg]

The fact is that there is no reason to ask for a family's personal information for an assigment. Unless maybe you are doing a family tree or something of that nature and even then you have to be very careful.

For a math assignment, there should be fictional situations designed to complete the assignment. No one needs to know how much someone spent on school supplies (maybe they were donated?) or how much a person spends on groceries. Even if the assignment WAS about money and budgeting, there is no reason why they need actual amounts from anyone.

The teacher should always (not just now) take into consideration that she/he does not know what that child goes home to every night and should not ask questions that the family could, in any way, feel uncomfortable answering.

I would just make up answers and leave it at that.

I taught in an inner city school, some of my students were in foster care, some lived in the homeless shelter with their parent(s), many came from single parent families. The assignment is simply inappropriate. There are just too many other ways this lesson could have been done appropriately than to ask families personal information. JMHO

 

[I*heart*MickeyMouse]

Wow. IMO you all are totally overthinking this third grade assigment. Again, it's not the IRS, it's a third grade homework sheet. Overanalyzing and what-not... not necessary. It's not like receipts need to be turned in. Write whatever you think is a good answer, no harm no foul.

(((hugs))) to the OP... I hope things turn around soon for you guys.

(and YAY on the psat fee being waived!!!)

 

[ccgirl]

Again - for those not reading the whole thread - the OP has said these were NOT the answers she gave, she was just venting in her post.

Thanks for pointing this out. Obviously, I broke the cardinal rule and did not read the entire post before posting myself.

OP - thank you for updating your original post so people don't make the same stupid mistake I did.

So glad you got the PSAT fee waived. I would still see what you could do for the field trip fee.

So glad your DH got a job....I wish you all the best!

A bit off topic but...BTW...I send my DD7 to private school. Compared to the other students she has next to nothing. I tell her the "things" aren't important. If we have extra money; I choose to give it to others that really need it and not buy material things. If I tried to keep up with the joneses we would never be happy. I'm very careful to not tell her that we can't afford something (even if that may be true). I simply say that I don't want to spend my money on that. She is learning. She spent all her birthday money for a clothing drive her school had after the Haiti earthquake. She said she had food, clothing, shelter and a roof over her head and didn't need the money. I was so very proud that day.

Best of luck to you!

 

[taterules]

It seems like using a fictional family in the assignment would cause all the same problems. Then a parent would look at it and say, "They're telling my 3rd grader that regular people spend $150 a month on going out to eat, and they buy $50 worth of school supplies for each kid, and we just couldn't afford to do that this year. In this economy, why are they making my kid, who is aware of our situation, feel extra bad?" I think this is one reason the schools don't want to teach anything about finances or budgeting. Some parents are bound to be upset that the lessons are "making them look bad."

 

[momxx5]

Well, DD, with the help of her sister(12) and a friend of brother(15) did the interview themselves and choose a TV family.

The did it on the Fletchers. Yep, Phinneas & Ferb! She was excited and had fun doing the assignment.

Thanks again for all the support and ideas.

 

[luvsJack]

Well, DD, with the help of her sister(12) and a friend of brother(15) did the interview themselves and choose a TV family.

The did it on the Fletchers. Yep, Phinneas & Ferb! She was excited and had fun doing the assignment.

Thanks again for all the support and ideas.

What a great idea!! Now see, that is the kind of creative ideas I hope to see in my classroom some day. Its exactly the kind of thing that the teacher should of/could of done to make this a totally fun and in now way personal assignment.

I am glad she was excited and had fun, that is what school is SUPPOSED to do, make kids excited about learning.

Good Job, Mom!!

 

[OceanAnnie]

Well, DD, with the help of her sister(12) and a friend of brother(15) did the interview themselves and choose a TV family.

The did it on the Fletchers. Yep, Phinneas & Ferb! She was excited and had fun doing the assignment.

Thanks again for all the support and ideas.

That is awesome! I'm glad they had fun. Neat idea they came up with.

 

[beansmom]

We will be paid by the time the field trip money is due, so I will pay it. In the past when we were very comfortble financially I often checked the box and sent in extra money to "sponsor" another child.
THANK YOU to all for your concern and thoughts. Prayers are needed and I thank God for my many Blessings and ask for guidance & strength.[/B]

#1- I am sooo glad some of these little things are gonna be ok.

#2- Maybe you will find comfort in the fact (well, not that exactly but maybe some irony) that I have been in those same straits for most of my adult life. I remember washing baby diapers by hand because I had no money for the laundromat. A few years ago, I sat in the dark and cold because I couldn't afford to get my electricity turn on til payday. I've had to call in sick on Wednesday so I would have enough gas to get to work to pick up my check on Thursday. God FORBID the checks should be a day late...I was scr*wed.

NOW, however, all my friends tell me 'you don't understand what it's like' when they have financial struggles because my DH is a doctor and we can afford a big house (which he and his EXwife bought and paid for), a new car and to travel some. Nobody remembers the 'good old days' when all we had to eat was beans and mustard or the days when I only owned ONE pair of shoes--tennis shoes at that. They actually make me feel ashamed of my good fortune (after years of being the working poor and having a husband who wouldn't work a lick most of the time) and I'm almost afraid to tell the truth when they say 'How are things?'

And WE have to watch what we spend...even tho my wonderful DH has spent a fortune helping my ODS get a 'second chance' over the last year.

Sometimes I just wanna slap people.

Ok, sorry for the rant...anyway, I guess we all have money issues...and time does pass and things change. Hoping better times are looming in your near future.

 

[churchpilot]

Well, DD, with the help of her sister(12) and a friend of brother(15) did the interview themselves and choose a TV family.

The did it on the Fletchers. Yep, Phinneas & Ferb! She was excited and had fun doing the assignment.

Thanks again for all the support and ideas.

I am praying that your job/financial situation turns around in a hurry. I have a feeling you have made it this far because of your attitude and creativity, and this is a good example. While I know this is not easy for you or your kids, they sound like well adjusted, reasonable children and my hat is off to you. Best wishes.

 

[shellyfive]

So glad things are looking better for you!!
I have a job and I still would have picked someone elses family for the numbers (was thinking Mulan's, but Ferb's was a great idea!!)
We are a family of seven too, and have to choose which events the kids can go to.....the rigors of having a big happy family!!!!

And to think I was complaining about the essay the 7th grade teacher wanted the parents to write on the second day of school!!!!
(and we were told we could use the back of the paper also if we needed)

 

[momxx5]

Once again,

a HUGE thank you for all your kind words, support and most importantly understanding!!!

A special thanks to a lil' angel who's heart is bigger than any of my problems.

We have to remember as Moms (mostly moms here, no offense dads) that we have each other to rely on, bonce ideas off, and for never ending support.


Shellyfive -
Now homework.....that is a whole other subject. And I feel as parents that we have already done our share of homework and then some.....so to give parents an Essay for homework....that is just nuts!!! (no offense to teachers). A much volunteering I do, while attending school and making sure that my own children are doing their homework - to give me homework....that would have put me right over the edge. Good luck.

 

[Colleen27]

I'm glad to hear it worked out! I'm with you at being a little surprised by the assignment and thinking it is more than a little insensitive right now. Many of the families at our school are in the position of being on assistance for the first time, needing the free backpacks/school supplies the county distributes, going to helping hands for winter coats, etc. that any personal financial assignment is bound to bring up bad feelings. And this isn't a traditionally poor area, just a blue collar community too dependent on manufacturing and construction.

 

[disneymom3]

The fact is that there is no reason to ask for a family's personal information for an assigment. Unless maybe you are doing a family tree or something of that nature and even then you have to be very careful.

For a math assignment, there should be fictional situations designed to complete the assignment. No one needs to know how much someone spent on school supplies (maybe they were donated?) or how much a person spends on groceries. Even if the assignment WAS about money and budgeting, there is no reason why they need actual amounts from anyone.

The teacher should always (not just now) take into consideration that she/he does not know what that child goes home to every night and should not ask questions that the family could, in any way, feel uncomfortable answering.

I would just make up answers and leave it at that.

I completely agree. We are fine finanacially and I wouldn't have provided actual numbers. No way is that anyone else's business. And IMO, second grade is WAY too young to have to worry about your family's budget whether there is enough money or not.