Missing School...

kristenrice

NOT just an ambulance driver
Joined
Apr 25, 2006
Messages
7,421
I'm so torn right now...

When DH and I bought into DVC back in 2008, our girls were 3 and 5 and just starting school. We said that we would never take them out of school and so we'd planned to travel over spring break and in the early summer.

In 2014, I will be turning 40 in October. The kids have a break when they will have a 1/2 day on Wednesday followed by Thursday and Friday off. This happens to be the week after my birthday so we decided to let them miss the 2.5 days of school that week so that we could have our family vacation in the fall.

Then, we found out that DD8 needs knee surgery next week:headache:. (**Quick back track....DH and I ran the W&D 1/2 Marathon in 2013 and loved it! DD8 saw our medals and said that she wants to run in a RD race too. She looked at the RD website and fell in love with the Expedition Everest Challenge medal...) So, in May 2015, DD8 will be old enough to participate in that event. DD10 is already an avid 5K runner (she even wants to try a 10K this year!) so she is on board with the race too. DH and I discussed it and decided that the race would be a great goal to help motivate her through her 6 weeks on crutches followed by physical therapy and rehab. We told her that if she works really hard, her knee should be in great shape to do the race. (Her doctor was 100% on board with this plan:thumbsup2). Then it hit me that the 2015 race is during the same school year as our trip this fall:eek:. Due to travel expenses, we will not go for less than 5 nights because it is just not worth it to make it any shorter. The race is on a Saturday night so we would travel Thursday-Tuesday. This means that they would miss school for 4 days, based on flight times.

Is 6 1/2 days of vacation days too much for one school year? This would be at the beginning (Oct) and end (May) of the year. The girls have never missed school for anything except illness so I don't know what an acceptable amount of family vacation time would be:confused3. DH and I both work full-time (opposite days) so we are rarely together as a family and we really make the most of our annual, 5-night getaway.

Will the teachers be horribly upset if we allow the kids to miss this much school? They go to a private school, if that makes a difference. Any advice?
 
IMO, it's not too much time for the kids to miss school as long as they keep up their schoolwork before and after the trips. We took my kids out for a week in Dec 2010, so they were 11 and 8 at the time. It was motivation for them to keep their grades up because if they didn't, they'd be doing extra work on vacation! I would say since the time is split, it's even less of an issue. There are some who will disagree with me, and they're entitled to their opinion. For me and my family, sometimes time together is more important than time in school. Hope all goes well with your daughter's surgery and she's up and about and able to complete her run!

Kathy
 
I'd recommend talking to your school principal to find out how many days your kids are allowed to be out of school. Our district allows 10 parent excused absences per school year, after that every absence must be doctor excused or it will be considered unlawful. However, it is possible to get special permission from the school board to take a long vacation. The kids just have to complete school work while on vacation.

Just make sure the kids know that if they miss school for Disney they probably won't be able to miss any more school unless they are gravely ill--that means no mental health days! I know school is important and I shouldn't condone frivolous absences, but I allow my oldest to miss school 2 or 3 times in the school year for no reason at all. In fact, we just had a mental health day, it was an unseasonably warm day in January so we went mini golfing and then went to Dairy Queen and ate Blizzards for lunch. Probably our kids won't remember every single thing that they learned in school, but when they are adults they will definitely remember the special days, whether it's a Disney vacation or skipping school to mini golf with mom.
 
I'm so torn right now...

When DH and I bought into DVC back in 2008, our girls were 3 and 5 and just starting school. We said that we would never take them out of school and so we'd planned to travel over spring break and in the early summer.

In 2014, I will be turning 40 in October. The kids have a break when they will have a 1/2 day on Wednesday followed by Thursday and Friday off. This happens to be the week after my birthday so we decided to let them miss the 2.5 days of school that week so that we could have our family vacation in the fall.

Then, we found out that DD8 needs knee surgery next week:headache:. (**Quick back track....DH and I ran the W&D 1/2 Marathon in 2013 and loved it! DD8 saw our medals and said that she wants to run in a RD race too. She looked at the RD website and fell in love with the Expedition Everest Challenge medal...) So, in May 2015, DD8 will be old enough to participate in that event. DD10 is already an avid 5K runner (she even wants to try a 10K this year!) so she is on board with the race too. DH and I discussed it and decided that the race would be a great goal to help motivate her through her 6 weeks on crutches followed by physical therapy and rehab. We told her that if she works really hard, her knee should be in great shape to do the race. (Her doctor was 100% on board with this plan:thumbsup2). Then it hit me that the 2015 race is during the same school year as our trip this fall:eek:. Due to travel expenses, we will not go for less than 5 nights because it is just not worth it to make it any shorter. The race is on a Saturday night so we would travel Thursday-Tuesday. This means that they would miss school for 4 days, based on flight times.

Is 6 1/2 days of vacation days too much for one school year? This would be at the beginning (Oct) and end (May) of the year. The girls have never missed school for anything except illness so I don't know what an acceptable amount of family vacation time would be:confused3. DH and I both work full-time (opposite days) so we are rarely together as a family and we really make the most of our annual, 5-night getaway.

Will the teachers be horribly upset if we allow the kids to miss this much school? They go to a private school, if that makes a difference. Any advice?

In my opinion, as long as they are doing well in school it is not an issue. we pulled ours out for 6-8 consecutive days for several years prior to 7th grade (middle school for my son). We agreed that once they got to middle school, we would not take them out. If it's only a few days 5 months apart, it should not be a problem keeping up.

Best of luck on the surgery!
 

I know school is important and I shouldn't condone frivolous absences, but I allow my oldest to miss school 2 or 3 times in the school year for no reason at all. In fact, we just had a mental health day, it was an unseasonably warm day in January so we went mini golfing and then went to Dairy Queen and ate Blizzards for lunch. Probably our kids won't remember every single thing that they learned in school, but when they are adults they will definitely remember the special days, whether it's a Disney vacation or skipping school to mini golf with mom.

THIS, THIS, THIS! I took my daughter out of school on my day off to go see Frozen. I work all the time and we both NEEDED a fun girl's day together. Family time is just as important as doing well in school.

My husband and I both work in industries that are much busier in the spring/summer months. Neither of us is allowed to take vacation time from March-September. If we go on vacation, my daughter has to miss school or we have to go during the winter holidays.

Private schools here are much more forgiving about a student missing a week of school for a family vacation than the public schools are. My daughter's school has a policy of "God, Family, Education, Sports". Good grades help!
 
First, it depends on the policy of the school. If the school rules are OK with it then I would do it. When DS attended school his private school had a 20 day absence policy. No notes or doctors excuses were needed. As long as he didn't miss more than 20 days. After that it was an automatic fail for the year. He never came close to that so I would take him for long weekends.
 
THIS, THIS, THIS! I took my daughter out of school on my day off to go see Frozen. I work all the time and we both NEEDED a fun girl's day together. Family time is just as important as doing well in school.

My husband and I both work in industries that are much busier in the spring/summer months. Neither of us is allowed to take vacation time from March-September. If we go on vacation, my daughter has to miss school or we have to go during the winter holidays.

Private schools here are much more forgiving about a student missing a week of school for a family vacation than the public schools are. My daughter's school has a policy of "God, Family, Education, Sports". Good grades help!

:thumbsup2
 
As long as your child is doing well in school, it is fine to take her on these trips. I'm a teacher, and I have students miss all the time for vacations. The students make up the work, and everything is fine.

I personally am taking off next October for a trip with my children to Disney and MNSSHP. We don't have a fall break, and if I don't take the time off and let my children miss school, we'll never get to experience it.

Have a great time! :thumbsup2
 
1. Check school policy but also talk to teacher and principals. As a veteran administrator and teacher I can assure you there is wiggle room on what is excused and unexcused.

2. If you girls are capable students who are not at all struggling, 6-7 days will not be a problem. I've never seen a good student screw up their school year because they took a vacation. I have seen poor students or unmotivated students tank because they took a vacation. Know your kid.

3. If there is a state test during those times, find out if it used to promote your child or affect their GPA. If it does neither of those things, don't sweat it.

4. Have fun. (and I want to do wine and dine half mary too, but have been politely asked that we no longer go on what DH calls 'race-cations'!!!)
 
We take our kids (DS9, DD6) out of school each year for Disney... Always in January. This year we had a wedding this past fall and had to take them out for another 5-days. No problems at all. They were assigned work and must complete detailed journals, and they did the work. Neither struggle in school so it's hasn't been an issue yet. Our school district allows 10 days absent per year for educational trips. Other than those, they haven't missed any days.

Sent from my iPad using DISBoards
 
I agree with the others who suggested you first check your school's policy. Our public school only allows 3 excused abscences, approved ahead of time, for family travel and such. That said, we and others have pulled ours out for 5 days without a problem for a Disney trip. As long as they are good students and you communicate with the teacher, it likely will not be an issue. Our oldest is a 6th grader now, and I would no longer feel comfortable pulling him out for more than a couple of days. So do it now while you can!

I was a teacher, and as long as I knew ahead of time that the students would be out, I always worked with them to make up the work. Of course there are some activities that cannot be made up (we do a lot of hands-on science kits). And definitely check to make sure that your kids won't be missing any testing (less likely in private school but still possible). Our schools are not allowed to approve abscences ahead of time when state testing is going on, since there is a window of time when the tests are allowed to be given.
 
I am a teacher and as long as parents give enough notice, it's fine with me.

However, each school district has their own attendance policies. I know that our district allows a certain number of days as long as their is an educational tie-in to the trip.

For my students who travel, I have them keep a journal of their trip (writing), calculate mileage, costs, etc (math), research the area and note any historical points (social studies), etc. As long as they can tie in some aspects of their trip to the various subject areas...
 
Asking the teacher is a nice courtesy, but the principal is who you REALLY need to contact.
 
The principal may be the one to "authorize" an absence, but it's the teacher who will be called on the carpet if a student is failing. So while, yes, talk to the school administrator, talk to the teacher as well.

I really have no problem with motivated students missing school, but I once had a student who had a 1.0 GPA and his mom wanted to take him out for a week. She met with us, and we spoke about his grades and lack of motivation, and the fact he was already at risk of being held back. Mom didn't care, took him out anyway, and then wanted me to stay after school with her son every day until he was caught up so he wouldn't fail and be retained. That's not fair to the teacher, and my administrator had to intervene because she threatened to file a complaint and possibly sue the school for not passing her kid on.

So, if your kids are doing well, are motivated to get their work done, and are willing to put in extra effort (possibly with the parents' help), then taking them out isn't going to be a big deal.
 
Your 8-year old will probably also miss school for her knee surgery and recovery, won't she? I would talk to your school about it. They may not want her to take time off for 2 family vacations in addition to the time lost for her knee. Also, May is at the end of the year and they may have projects and/or tests and that missed time may set them back.

That being said, 8 & 10 is not a really bad age to take kids out of school. Middle school and high school would be much worse.
 
I pretty much agree with the rest, my girls are 7 and 9 and will be missing 6 days in a row due to our trip (Friday and then the entire next week). They haven't missed any other days the entire school year so that helps but still. Education is wonderful but so are life experiences. If they were struggling in school or in middle/high school it might be different, but as it is I am completely comfortable with it. I already let their teachers and school know and have had nothing but positive responses.
 
Your 8-year old will probably also miss school for her knee surgery and recovery, won't she?

Actually, her knee surgery is this Thursday so she will miss Thursday and Friday. We're hoping to have her back in school on Monday since it is an outpatient (arthroscopic) procedure. The vacation days she would miss will be next (school) year, when she is in third grade.

Right now, we're really playing it by ear. The condition she has is rarely found in someone her age. It's primarily found in adolescent athletes, as it is typically brought on by overuse. Even then, it only occurs in 15-30 per 100,000 people and it is two times more common in males than females. I have done as much research on the internet as I could and I have not found any cases of children under the age of 10 being diagnosed with it. Hopefully, she does not have (or get) it in her other knee. The surgery will involve drilling small holes into the end of her femur to try and stimulate blood flow and bone remodeling. She has a lesion that is not getting enough blood flow and it is starting to separate from the bone. Right now, it is a grade 2 (out of 4) which is worse then when it was first diagnosed 6 months ago. The area affected is the part of the bone that absorbs about 70% of the impact of each step so she will be STRICTLY non-weight-bearing on that leg for SIX weeks:sad1:. It will be VERY hard for her since she is a very active kid...aren't they all at that age;)? That's why we want to motivate her as much as possible.

So far, the school has been very sympathetic and accommodating with her. She's had a few orthopedic appointments and three MRI's up until now and they had no problem with her missing a bit of class time for them. They were trying their best to watch her during recess to make sure she wasn't jumping off of anything or running too much. Her gym teacher had several activities for her that did not involve jumping or hopping...and now she hates gym class:lmao:. I think her teacher next year will know what she's going through now and will probably be more than willing to let her miss school if she is going to run the race. It will be quite a show and tell when she gets back:rotfl2:.
 
I have zero issues with taking my kids out of school for family stuff. I usually get jumped on in these type of threads for saying this, but I stand by it: *I* am the parent. *I* make the decisions. I absolutely tell the teachers ahead of time, I absolutely do it with politeness. But I don't "ask"...I tell. AND I ask if it's necessary, could they have some work to do on the plane or in the airport. It's NEVER been an issue....that being said, we live in a rural area, and this type of thing is common due to finances, work schedules etc. AND my girls are good students, so it never affects their grades and so on.

HTH!
 
My daughter is in second grade and attends private school. In the planner we get every year, it also has the rules, etc. It has to be signed by both parents and kids and handed in. It says that it's strongly frowned upon to take kids at of school for vacations and that is what scheduled vacations are for. It also says that the school and teachers are under no obligation to hand out missed work. That being said, I know some families do take their kids out. But, for us, personally, we don't. I feel the time spent in the classroom and whatever they're learning at the time is very important and for my daughter, she benefits from it. What would I be teaching her if I pulled her out of school for vacation? That vacation is more important than school? It's a hot topic and you'll get many opinions.
 
My daughter is in second grade and attends private school. In the planner we get every year, it also has the rules, etc. It has to be signed by both parents and kids and handed in. It says that it's strongly frowned upon to take kids at of school for vacations and that is what scheduled vacations are for. It also says that the school and teachers are under no obligation to hand out missed work. That being said, I know some families do take their kids out. But, for us, personally, we don't. I feel the time spent in the classroom and whatever they're learning at the time is very important and for my daughter, she benefits from it. What would I be teaching her if I pulled her out of school for vacation? That vacation is more important than school? It's a hot topic and you'll get many opinions.

I agree 100%. Our parochial school has the same policy. I think it also puts the teacher in a tough spot to try to help one student catch up to the rest of the class with all of the material that was missed when that student was absent. I also look at it as a waste of tuition money...but that's just me. I get a little miffed when they have a delayed start or an early dismissal as soon as a few snow flakes start falling! :laughing:
 



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