I can't answer all of your questions, but when we went a few years back, our youngest 2 children hated it because it was too loud. They were 4 and 2 at the time.
This is NOT a dinner show at all in the traditional sense. The event takes place in an outdoor pavilion and seating is first come, first served. You get your food by walking through a buffet type line. The food was pretty good from what I remember. It was basic picnic fare stuff.
About 30 minutes after they begin admitting people, the "show" begins. Lots of character dancing and game playing with the kids. Very loud music. While our children went down front to participate, my wife and I could not even carry on a conversation. After a total of 45 minutes, we left and went to the Magic Kingdom for the rest of the night. I had really been looking forward to this for a long time, but left underwhelmed.
I know that I didn't answer too many of your specific questions, but hopefully I've helped out some. I believe that the show was scheduled to last 2 hours, but by then we were long gone.
I've suggested to my family about going back on our next trip since our kiddos will be much older, but the only place they want to go to is the Hoop De Doo Revue!