marriage counseling

[hlane]

My DH has finally agreed to go to marriage counseling but now I'm scared. I know it's going to be painful for both of us and bring up a lot of stuff that we've never fully dealt with, past & present. We get three visits a year though EAP but I'm not sure thats even going to be enough to get past the surface and now I'm concerned that starting will just open all the wounds but won't give us enough time to deal with the issues or heal.

 

[mickeyboat]

I don't know a ton about marriage counseling, but I think you have two choices:

Commit to the counseling as long as you need it, even if it means finding the money for it elsewhere. Would you be comfortable with a faith-based counselor (might cost less)?

or

Ask for lots of homework assignments and suggested readings so you can do a lot of the work at home yourself (which I am guessing your counselor will have you do anyway).

Good luck to you and bravo for wanting to do the tough work to make your marriage better.

Denae

 

[MIGrandma]

No, 3 visits probably won't be enough.

My DD and DS each went through counseling with their spouses. I'm not sure how many sessions DD and her DH went to, but I know it was twice a week for awhile.

DS and his DW went once weekly, and they paid $25 per session. They went for several weeks.

Good luck to you. It's wonderful that you are going for counseling and I do hope it helps.

 

[tar heel]

Your insurance probably covers individual counseling -- could you do some of that to get more out of the marital counseling?

 

[The Mystery Machine]

Your insurance probably covers individual counseling -- could you do some of that to get more out of the marital counseling?

Good idea.

Can you get individual counseling covered OP?

 

[mtemm]

(((HUGS))) you know, it can be very hard and scary and painful, but it also can be wonderful and enlightening and liberating. 3 visits most likely won't scratch the surface, but if you can swing more, and get the right therapist, it can be the best gift you ever give yourself and your husband.

I wish you well. my dh and I have gone thru marriage counseling and there have been really tough sessions, and really wonderful sessions, and I have to say even the tough ones have been some of the best ones.

I absolutely agree about looking into individual sessions, too, especially if they are covered, to help enhance/help you each process the mc sessions. and do your work! ask for books/homework, etc, from your MC, to help enhance the sessions, then do it. there are a lot of people who go into mc who don't go into it looking to really do the work and it ends up not being nearly as effective as it can be.

good luck!