Little Presents

[fey_spirit]

Ok I have a question for the parents out there.

My GF and I will be going to Disney in December and I am considering picking up little dollar packs of Disney Playing Cards, The wash cloths that swell up when you put them in water with Disney Designs, little individulaly wrapped candy canes, ectera. I thought I could give these out to the kids (of all ages) in the park just as little "share the magic and a Merry Christmas" type gesture.


The GF thinks that if I do this I will get a lot of disturbed parents who think I'm some kind of child molester or soemthing.

My question is who's right? Would you as parents be offended, or scared of a strange lady bearing gifts? Even in Disney World?

 

[Mark_Millder]

Ok I have a question for the parents out there.

My GF and I will be going to Disney in December and I am considering picking up little dollar packs of Disney Playing Cards, The wash cloths that swell up when you put them in water with Disney Designs, little individulaly wrapped candy canes, ectera. I thought I could give these out to the kids (of all ages) in the park just as little "share the magic and a Merry Christmas" type gesture.


The GF thinks that if I do this I will get a lot of disturbed parents who think I'm some kind of child molester or soemthing.

My question is who's right? Would you as parents be offended, or scared of a strange lady bearing gifts? Even in Disney World?

Would the staff @ WDW allow you to do that?
If a cast member hand them something I wouldn't have a problem with it. If a person gives them something, let's say at the entrance, I would find it a bit suspicious I think.

 

[fakereadhed]

I wouldn't let my kids take them from a stranger just out of principle. I know it's Disney but it sets the stage for them trusting another stranger that gives goodies to them.

I think you have a great heart, and love the idea though. Maybe you could donate them to Make-A-Wish to hand out for you at Disney?

 

[tlstyxx1]

How about when you are in line and the kids around you start to get antsy? You could always say to the parent.."Hey I have an extra XXX, do you mind if I let your child have it?" Maybe the cards or other items would help to keep them busy for a little bit and it gives the parent the option to say no. I think the idea is grand, but I do understand peoples concerns.

When we were at the space center a child was having a full blown temper tantrum on the bus. After about 5 minutes of the crying and listening to the parents try, unsuccessfully, to get her settled, I asked if she was allowed to have a piece of gum....she quieted right down and the relief on the parents face was priceless!!!

 

[maxtomsmom]

I have to agree with the other posts. It's hard to teach your child to be careful and not set the example. You are thoughtful and most people, I believe, are like you caring, but it can confuse our kids. My son is just really beginning to understand that there are very bad people who would harm him, which is why I need to know where he is at all times. I do like the idea another person wrote about having a crying child in line and offering them a small treat. Maybe not cards, but if you have a lollipop (if the kid is old enough) or stickers that would probably be ok with most parents. I know if my 2 1/2 yr old was very cranky and you offered him a sticker, I would be appreciative. I usually like to take it from the adult so you might want to give it to the parent again the whole stranger thing.

 

[powellrj]

As a parent I would be very concerned about an adult that was handing out anything to children at Disney. Even if it were another parent, I wouldn't let my child take anything.

While I know your heart is in the right place, with all the strange people out there, I think you would just be setting yourself up for problems.

 

[Vickie46]

I think you should just inform the parents first.. and go from there... how nice of you!!!

 

[emma'smom]

I agree...talk to the parent first and explain that you want to just "share the magic" and then let the parent actually accept the gift from you. We had a situation one day at a mall food court where a woman wanted to give dd a happy meal toy. It was pretty clear that she had ordered the happy meal as her lunch (probably cheaper than ordering ala cart for smaller portions) and didn't really have any use for the toy. At any rate, at first I said "no" out of principle- but then she explained that she had just ordered the happy meal to get a better deal on her lunch and she offered to give it me "for later". I did take it, thanked her, and put it in my purse. Lo and behold....it was great to pull out during a long car ride later that week!

 

[Hannathy]

Wouldn't bother me a bit unless my kids didn't say thank you! It is a shame kids are being so brainwashed and paranoid about the world. Our rule has always been you can talk to anyone you want to you just can't go with them. My kids have had some very interesting conversations with people from all over the world and learned some interesting stories. I guess when the man offered my DD the large intricate shell at the jersey shore that he found ( I've never seen one like that that far north in all my years) she should have said no cause he was a stranger! We still have it.

I would wait till you were in line or sitting waiting on a show or parade and talk to them first. And I'd stick to very inexpensive things so the parents don't feel funny about accepting a big gift. I do think you will probably run into a bunch of paranoid parents who will be rude but there will be others who think you are being kind.

 

[maxtomsmom]

Wouldn't bother me a bit unless my kids didn't say thank you! It is a shame kids are being so brainwashed and paranoid about the world. Our rule has always been you can talk to anyone you want to you just can't go with them. My kids have had some very interesting conversations with people from all over the world and learned some interesting stories. I guess when the man offered my DD the large intricate shell at the jersey shore that he found ( I've never seen one like that that far north in all my years) she should have said no cause he was a stranger! We still have it.

I would wait till you were in line or sitting waiting on a show or parade and talk to them first. And I'd stick to very inexpensive things so the parents don't feel funny about accepting a big gift. I do think you will probably run into a bunch of paranoid parents who will be rude but there will be others who think you are being kind.

I suppose we don't see eye to eye on this one. Talking to a stranger and accepting a gift is something completely different. Talking to someone while waiting on line is normal. We talk about this at home. Our older son knows not to give his whole name and where we live to strangers, but his first name is ok. He also knows not to tell anyone my or my husband's name or our secret word, which is an emergency word. While you see that kids are being brainwashed, I see as teaching them about reality. The reality becomes more intense as times go on and as they get older. I live near NYC and we knew several people who died on 9-11 so it's important to teach kids about the "real world". WHile I don't let my 5 yr old know everything just yet, he does understand what has happened to our neighbor and family friend. Schools also talk about stranger danger appropriately. We've also had a missing child in our family, who thankfully was ok. She simply wandered off from my cousin (her mom). Scared my cousin to the point of throwing up for weeks. It was the longest 3 hours of her life. So my point, it is important to teach children stranger danger and young ones are too trusting to really get it. My sons have never had anyone be mean to them so they think everyone is like mommy and daddy. While I think it is a very kind gesture to offer children something, it should be done with caution and I think that is what most people would feel. I don't see anyone here being paranoid, cautious but rightfully so.

 

[Juliegirl1]

He also knows not to tell anyone my or my husband's name or our secret word, which is an emergency word.

Question - How do you use your secret word? Also I'm just curious and I'm not flaming - what happens if your child gets lost - is he allowed to give your names out then? I've been trying to come up with a game plan for my DS and I when we go to Disney.

Also to the OP - offer anything to the parent without even looking at the child - say something along the lines of "Would you like to give this to your child? I'm just trying to spread some magic." and then don't be offended if the parent says no - just say okay and go on your merry way. Also as a parent I would be more apt to take something that wasn't food, like a glow stick or a sticker, which I think would be your best bets.

 

[mask_w03]

It's a nice thought and it's nice you want to share your love of Disney with others. But truly i think many parents will say no and think you are strange. All parents want their kids to never take things from strangers and Disney is no different.

 

[Honeymooner04]

While I think that it's nice that you want to spread the magic, I personally wouldn't let my daughter take anything at Disney or anywhere else. It is a dangerous world out there and I don't think you are brainwashing your kids if you teach them that not everyone is nice. Just my .02

 

[maxtomsmom]

Question - How do you use your secret word? Also I'm just curious and I'm not flaming - what happens if your child gets lost - is he allowed to give your names out then? I've been trying to come up with a game plan for my DS and I when we go to Disney.

Also to the OP - offer anything to the parent without even looking at the child - say something along the lines of "Would you like to give this to your child? I'm just trying to spread some magic." and then don't be offended if the parent says no - just say okay and go on your merry way. Also as a parent I would be more apt to take something that wasn't food, like a glow stick or a sticker, which I think would be your best bets.

I figured I would get a response to this. There's a very long and sad story to go with it. We came up with the secret word after my mom was in a serious car accident with my younger son. She was the person designated to pick him up. We had to call the school and have a neighbor pick him up. He wouldn't go with the neighbor because she has never done it before. Now we called the school to let them know she was coming and what had happened. I spoke to the Director myself. Neither me nor my husband could be there as we were dealing with some major decisions - My mom was in critical care, her friend needed two hundred stitches and my baby was only minor hurt. The hospital wouldn't let me drive as I as a mess. I got that lovely phone call at work.

So afterwards we decided to come up with a game plan. We said to our older son, "If anything like this happens again or for some reason, mommy can't pick you up from school or the bus, (I could be late) I will let the person know the secret word." Once the word is used, we will have another. The word is very easy and we let him come up with it. We practiced it once like a fire drill. We had to because he was so upset and I felt so bad. Our neighbor did not bring him to the hospital so he was very concerned. She actually did not know what to do. I felt bad putting her in that situation. THe only reason I called her was everyone else works and she lives close to his school. She also has children he plays with so he would be distracted. I came home late that night, but my husband was home to help him. I had to stay with the baby.

Now- he has been lost and he is allowed to tell a store clerk the name of the parent with him, which he did. He was only lost for 1 minute. He really wasn't lost, as I saw him go up to the sales clerk and say, "I can't find my mommy." The sales clerk asked him his name and my name which he did tell her. I then immediately stepped in. We talked about it and I told him that it was ok to tell her our names because she would help him. What I meant about not telling our names is going up to someone, starting a conversation and giving the stranger our life stories. He loves to talk, he's the mayor as we call him. He's very social, but he is learning boundaries. I would like him to always be this way, wearing rose colored glasses and seeing only beauty, but well you know....

 

[emma'smom]

When my brother was three, he got away from my parents and was wandering alone in a store. Someone found him and brought him to the service desk where they asked him his name. Then they announced over the loud speaker "Will the parents of Andrew the Menace" please come to the service desk. We have located your child!

(note- this was in the 1970's...they probably wouldn't announce any child's name outloud now).

 

[dzorn]

I would suggest a donation to Give the Kids the World or Make a Wish instead.



Denise in MI