Large Families - how do you cope with college expenses?

[4forMe]

I'm just wondering how the large families on this board are coping with college expenses. Every time I crunch numbers, I feel sick. Our state flagship is NOT an affordable option as it's around 35k per year depending on your major. Two or three of my children will probably qualify for some scholarships. I think we will be encouraging them to apply at LAC's that give a lot of merit aid (we will not qualify for any financial aid).

We do have a substantial amount of savings set aside. We do not, though, have 800K in savings for them to go to whatever school they would like. My oldest is set on a college that costs @ 60k per year and that's just not going to happen without substantial merit aid. Also, our kids know that the money they will be making from their summer jobs will be going to pay for college expenses. We want them to come out of school with as little debt as possible.

So, to ask again, how have you prepared for college expenses if you have a large family?

 

[danygirl]

We have three. I got a job at a university which discounts the tuition for employees and our kids. The youngest wanted a different experience so she got a FULL scholarship for leadership worth 150k. The middle one got a 20k scholarship which really brought her expenses down. Our HS college counselor meets with families and then matches kids with scholarships.

The youngest had great grades and super leadership and work experinces. The 20k scholarship was a Broad Prize for kids who had improved their grades - she had failed a course and had some lackluster grades the first year but improved. She is also very talented and was a big leader at school

So money is out there. Start with your counselor and apply for scholarships!!

 

[sweetdana]

I have intensions of paying for no more than every other year. And they will not get the $$ until they have a degree. I am not paying for them to play around, and figure out what they want to do.. They need to actually get a degree and finish...


I also will set a limit, and encourage the 1st 2 yrs at a comm coll, but if they hit the limit to go to their school of choice that is on them. Honestly making better college choices in our budget instead of going anywhere you want. Learning that if doing a comm college will bring the full bill down 1/3rd and going to a different school than 1st choice would save another 25%... IMO is the way DH and I live.. If they want more, that is thier choice.

 

[dislal]

I would love to send my kids to college, DH and I just cannot afford it, so we advised dd19 to check out all options. We did have her signed up at a college that was over $20,000 a year, but talked to her about our local community college, which in th e end she did choose.

She saved every penny she has ever made, bought herself a very cheap car under $2000 and so far next week she will begin her second semester (fully paid for by her). DH and I are letting her live with us free, buying all her food and personal items, I spent about $100 on shoes n new clothes at the beginning of year for her. Anything else she wants she buys herself. She got hired at our local target for Christmas help and we are currently hoping they keep her on the schedule so she will have gas money and doesn't have to touch her savings, until her summer job starts.

DH and I bought her four new snow tires for Christmas.

I hope we are teaching her good life skills , nothing in life is ever handed to you!

 

[DawnM]

Here is our plan below. However, please note that all is subject to change as they get closer to the actual date/time.

We have told them that we can foot the bill for their entire college degree at the local 4 year college. We can provide a home for them to live in here but will not pay for them to live in an apt. or dorm. Our local college runs about 10K per year, less than many pay for private K-12 school.

If they choose to go elsewhere, they pay the difference.

Another option for us is the local CC during high school. Classes taken before graduation can count towards high school AND college and are free. We homeschool so that option is definitely there.

Dawn

 

[tasha99]

3 kids and an unusual custody arrangement where I got full custody of the youngest two and my ex took our oldest. He has been paying for DS23's college and I have been paying for DS21's. Unfortunately, I was pretty poor for years, so I don't have a lot of savings. I've managed to be able to pay tuition, fees, and books at our state college (about 10K/yr). She uses her child support to pay her rent. She's taken out student loans for her other living expenses--something that isn't ideal, but is what's working for her now.

 

[Marionnette]

I'm just wondering how the large families on this board are coping with college expenses. Every time I crunch numbers, I feel sick. Our state flagship is NOT an affordable option as it's around 35k per year depending on your major. Two or three of my children will probably qualify for some scholarships. I think we will be encouraging them to apply at LAC's that give a lot of merit aid (we will not qualify for any financial aid).

We do have a substantial amount of savings set aside. We do not, though, have 800K in savings for them to go to whatever school they would like. My oldest is set on a college that costs @ 60k per year and that's just not going to happen without substantial merit aid. Also, our kids know that the money they will be making from their summer jobs will be going to pay for college expenses. We want them to come out of school with as little debt as possible.

So, to ask again, how have you prepared for college expenses if you have a large family?

We have 3, all of whom are still in school at this point. DD finished her undergraduate degree 2 years ago and is now in medical school with a Navy scholarship that is covering everything and gives her a $2K monthly stipend. DS#1 will graduate from our state's flagship university this spring with his BS. DS#2 has another year at a smaller state school but he is on target to graduate in the spring of 2015.

We started by saving aggressively for college from the time that they were born. Even so, the amount that we were able to sock away did not cover everything. DD chose a local, private university that offered her a wonderful scholarship IF she commuted rather than living on campus. DS#1 attended a satellite campus of his university for the first two years and then transferred to the main campus for his final two years. DS#2 got a scholarship to his university that the lacrosse coach set him up for (they are not a D1 school, so it is NOT an athletic scholarship). All of the schools participate in a program called Tuition Management Services where TMS pays the tuition bill when it is due and we pay TMS a monthly amount over the course of the semester. When all 3 were undergraduates, that meant thousands of dollars every month.

I won't lie and tell you that it has been easy. It has been a very big financial burden to put them through school. I drive the same car that we bought when they were all in grade school. We don't eat out. We don't take weekend getaways. We don't do a lot of the redecorating or upgrades to our house that I would love to do. Not everyone is willing to make those compromises. We see it as being one of the greatest gifts that we can give our children and it's a sacrifice that we willingly took on so that they can graduate debt-free.

 

[a742246]

The most economically way to go is thru Community College then transfer to a 4 year school.
Hopefully you can find a Community College that has an internship program,
have them get an AA or AAS degree then transfer to a 4 year school.

PS. It is not the school that will make you successful. If you are determined, bright and have a good attitude your chances of success will be greater than any school you attend.

 

[allison443]

We have three, like you we do not qualify for financial aid. Paying for their college with no loans (for us or the kids) has been a priority for us. As a result the 55K-60K schools were not an option!

Our state flagship is about 25K a year. None wanted to go there, of course! They also looked at nearby out of state public universities which even with the out of state tuition charge, are cheaper for us than the privates. They wanted large schools and also flagships often have a very good reputation, a large alumni network, etc.

Child #1 graduated from an out of state flagship for about 25K a year.
Child #2 graduated from a different out of state flagship which was about 36K a year.
Child #3 isn't in college yet.

We also stressed that we pay for four years only. My kids are so happy they do not have student loans. They both got good jobs and have moved into their own apts. We live outside NYC so lots of job opportunities, but housing is expensive.

We also used the Tuition Management System that someone else mentioned. Our kids were responsible for earning their own spending money by working at school or during breaks, etc.

 

[supersnoop]

Most of the higher-end schools do not offer merit scholarships. They only accept the best, so you only get financial aid on a need basis.

Why do you think you won't qualify for need-based financial aid? Is your income too high, or do you have too many assets? You want to make sure that the kids don't have any money in their name. UTMA accounts count against assets when figuring financial aid qualifications. The best plan is to put money in a 529 account in the grandparents name. Also, put your savings into retirement accounts and your primary home. That way your cash savings won't be counted against you. In your regular accounts, sell any stock that has lost value, which will decrease your taxable income. Do not sell any investments that will result in capital gains.

 

[maggiew]

If they want to live on campus, have them look into being an RA in the dorms after their first year. They usually get housing for free plus a little stipend.

Maggie

 

[Marionnette]

Most of the higher-end schools do not offer merit scholarships. They only accept the best, so you only get financial aid on a need basis.

Why do you think you won't qualify for need-based financial aid? Is your income too high, or do you have too many assets? You want to make sure that the kids don't have any money in their name. UTMA accounts count against assets when figuring financial aid qualifications. The best plan is to put money in a 529 account in the grandparents name. Also, put your savings into retirement accounts and your primary home. That way your cash savings won't be counted against you. In your regular accounts, sell any stock that has lost value, which will decrease your taxable income. Do not sell any investments that will result in capital gains.

That is completely untrue. They offer plenty of merit scholarships, many of which are targeted for specific demographics such as females entering the engineering field or minority students with an interest in science, but not all. The top-tier schools want to attract the best and the brightest. They are able to attract those kids, not just with the excellent academics that they offer, but also with the promise of strong financial support.

 

[eliza61]

Not sure if the process is much different than with families that have only two or one. basically it's save as much as you can and discuss all the possibililties.

Dh and I always knew that due to our salaries we would not be able to get need based financial assistance. We realized that we would be footing the entire bill. talk about eating cheese and crackers for quite a while.

Now honorable son #1 is an aspie kid so we started him off at community college and he still did not do well. He is now in a plumbers apprencticeship program and thriving. so that college tuition was much lower. It's a 4 year program and when he finishes he will be a master plumber. If he gets into a union program they will pick up his tuition

Honorable son #2 wanted to go out of state. dh and I both attended out of state schools and valued the experience so we did encourage them to apply.

Basically we sat them down and told them our expectations. My youngest son recognizes the fact that he will be one of the small % of kids that will graduate without any student loans. He also understand that my money is not to be wasted, I ask for copies of his grades every term and if he doesn't perform he comes home. I was also a bit concern because he got a small athletic scholarship so I didn't know how he would handle his grades and his sports.

So far so good. He's in his second year, he is behind a semester because his dad died his freshmen year so he came home for a semester. I guess my biggest concern is that he hasn't decided on a major.

He has to work during his breaks (he worked during the winter break) and will work during the summer.

Now I don't believe that there is a direct correlation to how a kid performs and how much if their tuition they are responsible for. My parents paid for my tuition and believe me, I was fully aware that if I started fooling around my dad would have planted his size 13 shoes up my you know what so I took my studies very seriously. I also got a job working retail which was enough to make me stay focused. Working at Macys on 34thstreet during the christmas holiday is enough to put the fear of God into anyone.

I think my usual advice is:
1. talk with your kids and let them know how you can contribute.
2. discuss all their options

 

[angierae]

We are paying cash for a two year degree at the local community college that comes with an internship. Hopefully she will be able to get an entry level job with that, and then if she wants to complete a bachelor's part time, we will help with that tuition down the road once she's working. Going away to a four year school was never going to be an option for various reasons - financially, the fact that she's not a great student, etc.

 

[mjkacmom]

It's going to be tough! Dd17 has received merit aid from several colleges that she applied to. Of course, received $20,000 per year, when the school costs $45,000 per year, means that it brings her back to the same cost as staying in state (NJ - the highest in-state college costs for residents, very little merit aid). We will not qualify for financial aid. We do have some saved for college, but it is going to cost, at the very very least, $100,000 per child.

It stinks - dd has a 4.1 GPA, did very well on her SAT's, has had all honors/AP classes, is involved in extra curricular activities - did what we asked of her. She absolutely does not want to go to community college. She did get into the honors program at every college she heard back from.

Hopefully, we can pay half. Or win the lottery.

 

[Gigi22]

Truthfully, not everyone goes to college. In my DH's family, there were 8 kids. Of the 8, 5 went to college and graduated with at least one degree. As for other other 3 kids, I think 1 completed HS, the remaining 2 didn't.

 

[imsayin]

Hopefully you can find a Community College that has an internship program,
have them get an AA or AAS degree then transfer to a 4 year school.

If the plan is to attend a community college then transfer, I would focus on getting 60 credit hours that will transfer. If you get an AA degree, you will have credits that won't transfer and will need more hours in the end.

Most of the higher-end schools do not offer merit scholarships. They only accept the best, so you only get financial aid on a need basis.

That is completely untrue. They offer plenty of merit scholarships, many of which are targeted for specific demographics such as females entering the engineering field or minority students with an interest in science, but not all. The top-tier schools want to attract the best and the brightest. They are able to attract those kids, not just with the excellent academics that they offer, but also with the promise of strong financial support.

Actually, if you define higher-end schools as Ivy League or the top LAC's, then this is absolutely true. There are no merit scholarships or athletic scholarships, only financial aid based on need.

OP If your state school is U of IL (guessing based on that tuition), they do not give out a lot of scholarship money. Look for schools where your kid is in the top 25% of grade/test scores admitted to the school. This gives you a better chance at merit $$$. Also, some schools just give more than others.

 

[Egdisney]

I have 4 kids. The oldest is 9, I was just thinking about this last night. Most community colleges have articulation agreements with other nearby 4 year schools. You will the know which classes transfer, many times a whole degree will. I am hoping we can pay for my kids to do whatever they want, but of course that may not be the case. The state of MO offers 2 years at a community college if you meet certain criteria. My kids will be expected to participate in this program unless they prove not to be capable(not everyone can be an A/B student ). Chances are that they may be able to qualify for other scholarships while working towards this. I will definitely offer to pay the cost of tuition at community college over the life of their college years. I figure that way they will have some of their tuition paid for at the very least, and if they choose to complete that degree at a community college, good for them! Hopefully the education bubble will burst before my kids hit college. The costs is becoming prohibitive for many people.
I want my kids to follow their dreams, but I also want them to understand the importance of having something they can actually use. It is a fine line! There are some great jobs that only require an Associates degree. I want my kids to understand all their options. That's the most important thing I can do for them.

 

[lvillotta1]

Great thread. My girls are still young 6&9. I currently have about $15,000 for their education in a IRA under my moms name. When talking to my financial advisor he said this would work well for me in my situation. My mom is 66 so that interest can be withdrawn at any time. I make a decent salary,but not too much as I am single and I would like to get some money for them for college. I do have an emergency fund also and that money will also go into my mom's saving account so when college approaches on paper I will be pretty poor. Since colleges can not count your house and retirement against you I am hopeful that it will all work out.

I am encouraging both of my girls to go to the local CC. 1 has expressed an interest in being a dental hygeinest. I want them both to be debt free.

 

[Chelley00]

We have 4 kids. I didn't have any help from my parents at all going to college. I'd love to pay for all their schooling but we can't. We do have a 529 for each of them, enough to cover 4 years of books plus some, but we tell them all from a very early age they are on their own. Savings from high school jobs, get super great grades and we will see what we can to help here and there. DS20 was living in a dorm his first year and we paid for books, all his dorm stuff, sent care packages and gift cards and food often (and paid a tuition payment), but his tuition and room and board were all on him through scholarships, loans and savings.