OMG, what a crazy day. I got the mammogram, that was nothing to be afraid of. It was so easy and painless I feel embarrassed for worrying about it.
The problem is, they confirmed that I did find a lump in my breast (actually, the mammogram found two). They did an ultrasound to see if they were just cysts. Frankly, the ultrasound was more uncomfortable than the mammogram, that thing pressing down on my girl! Even that wasn't bad, just a tiny bit uncomfortable.
The masses were not cysts.

So they had to do a biopsy. Now that scared the h**l outta me. I feared that in a really big way. But they got me in today, same day, and honest to God, even the biopsy was completely painless. I did some deep breathing exercise and meditation and I didn't even know when she put the needle in. They numbed it up and I felt nothing. When the actual biopsy happened, there was a slight sensation that something happened, but nothing to be upset about. It wasn't pain or even discomfort...perhaps pressure. They said my girl would be sore after the numbing stuff wore off, but she's fine. It's like nothing happened. If I were told tomorrow that I had to do it again, I would not be upset at all.
I can't believe how painless it all was, even the biopsy. I feel very relieved that I got through all this.
So..........now I get to wait over the long holiday weekend to find out if I have breast cancer. They think it is probably benign, but they wanted to be sure. The doctor told me if it was breast cancer, it is extremely early and they could simply remove the lumps and I may not even need chemo. So I'm not too panicked. Maybe it's because I've gone through so much already (I have several autoimmune diseases) but I really feel ok about it all.
Anyway, I feel proud of myself for having found the lumps myself. I always felt like I wouldn't be able to find anything, but I did find them. Even my doctor didn't find it, but she ordered the mammogram anyway. See, breast self exams really work. If it is cancer, I found it, and it's very, very early. It's about 1cm, which is very small! I am now a firm believer in self exams!!!!!!!!!!