Kids Say the Darndest Things

[PigletsMommy]

I used to love that show and was so sad to hear the news yesterday that Art Linkletter passed.

So I was thinking in his honor... Whats the darndest thing you've heard kids say? Disney related or not...

I babysit for a little boy who went on vacation last week. He went to "Disney Weird"

 

[Nissi]

Not at all Disney-related, but when my now 18 year old son was about 3, we were standing in line at the grocery store. There was a middle-aged man standing in line in front of us with a very long gray beard. As soon as my son got a glimpse of him, he promptly shouted, "Wow, Ma, look at the chin on that guy!"

 

[AJRitz]

DS3 has been referring to our upcoming trip to Nickelodeon Universe at the Mall of America as going to the "amazement park".

Can't wait to hear what he thinks Disney is, if that little thing is the amazement park.

 

[Jana49]

Not Dis related, but years ago, my then-5 y/o nephew said to my mom:

"Grandma, you know why your arms are so fat? Because you're such a good cook!!"

She took it as a compliment, bless her!

 

[katiebug86]

My grandmother before she passed away had spider veins on her legs. My then 3-year-old niece went up to her and said "Granny you sure do you have a lot of tattoos"

 

[Maggie'sMom]

On our first real trip to WDW when DD was 3.5yo, we were standing in line for Cinderella's Carousel. I was looking around at all the kids with mouse ears. I said to DD, "I need to get you mouse ears." She said no, she didn't want them. Now, what kid doesn't want mouse ears? So I asked why. Her answer? "I don't need them. I already have ears."

 

[ktlm]

Two weeks ago we were driving in a car with my inlaws who were here from out of state for a short visit, and my 4 year old DD looks at them and says: "Mama says it's about time the two of you go home!" Even more shocking, because I had absolutely not said that!

 

[bas71873]

About 2 years ago, so DD would have been 4, DH and DD were at the pool on Saturday morning and a man, who had been swimming laps, got out of the pool, in a yellow speedo, and DD SHOUTED to my DH "why is that man wearing panties". Thankfully I was not there or I would have crawled under a chair, but evern more thankfully, DH does not think the guy heard her, but said the lifeguard got a good chuckle!

 

[4Pirates&APrincess]

I have an in home daycare and one of my little girls needed to use the restroom, my oldest son was in the main bathroom that the daycare kiddos usually use so I took her to the bathroom in my bedroom and as she was sitting there she looks up at me and says "you sure are a good gal to let me use your potty!" Boy do I love that little girl.

 

[cglaura]

Also not Disney related.

I homeschooled dd her entire school career. When she was around 6 or 7, she was doing a religion lesson on the 10 Commandments. It was youth version Bible, and the way they worded it, adultery was more like pre-marital relations, not extra-marital relations.

So the assignment was to write how you would use the 10 Commandments to live a better life...

"I will not commit adultery. I am going to wait until I get married!"



So, one of the things you learn as a homeschooler is how to rework your lesson plans when you realize they didn't quite grasp what was taught and do overs are sometimes a must

 

[Deesknee]

To the OP, I used to love "kids say the darndest things also." My kids remember when Bill Cosby hosted it. But, IMO, it just wasn't the same.

One of my favorites from when my DS was about 4.

Inorder to get the kiddos to bed I would "race" them up the stairs at night. Of couse the kids would always win...almost always.

One day ds tells dmil that "mommy beat me last night"

I quickly added....."up the stairs"!!! Thank Goodness DMIL knew me better!


Now for a WDW related. Anyone have what my mom calls a ****house inspector? Forgive me if the brand names are backwards, but you'll get the picture.

DS had to stop in every land while in the magic kingdom as a child. One day he comes out of a restroom in, I believe Epcot. As he & DH are walking out I hear DS ask DH, "that one had KOHLER potties, what's up with that" Apparently at the time American Standard was the potty of WDW. And, I thought my mom was only using "inspector" to make her point!


One more not WDW related.
DS was about 12 (I have to add an honor roll student). After an unfortunate doctor appointment that had made us all very nervous we brought him to a sit down restaurant to eat. He read the menu's ad that they have "bottomless" soda....ds asked the waitress how the soda stayed in the glass?!!

 

[dawson5]

My boys were potty inspectors too! I swear they know every one between here and Ohio.

About a year ago, we were on our way into town and passed a church. They were quite busy, lots of cars for a small church. My DS, 13 at the time, said "wow, they must spike the wine."

My oldest, when he was a toddler would come and tell my hubby and I that the "cow pee" was done.

 

[JOLLYHOLLY]

My husband recently took my 4 yr old fishing on our boat. My husband picked up the anchor and then my 4 yr old yelled out "Daddy you have big hookers". Now anytime he sees any kind of hook or anchor he talks about the hookers!

Funny!

Also when he first was starting to talk, he would try to say "Mommy I am hungry" instead he would blurt out "Mommy I am horney".
It took weeks to get him to pronounce it right. It was so embarassing!

 

[PigletsMommy]

To the OP, I used to love "kids say the darndest things also." My kids remember when Bill Cosby hosted it. But, IMO, it just wasn't the same.QUOTE]

I guess I remember the Bill Cosby one too, but the part that always stuck in my head was when they would bring out Art Linkletter and show the original clips. I forgot that someone else hosted it and he was actually a "guest" until you said that. There should be a smiley for memory loss...


I love reading all of these! Keep them coming!!

 

[gatormommy07]

So, in the time it took me to finish reading this thread my 2 year old just told me that toodles(mickey mouse clubhouse) has a big butt!! Then he asked me for some toast, I was holding him when it popped up and he says Whoa, that toast scare me!!! And I remembered one from when we were at MK this past March, we were getting him ready to use the potty and the sensor picked up our movement, he looks at me and said, wow that potty LOUD!!!!

 

[Nennie]

**Not my child, so don't flame me! LOL!!***

After my cousin's son got back from WDW, he got up for show and tell with whatever souvenier he had gotten, and then told the class about the trip, and that his favorite part of the trip was lying about his age to get in cheaper!

 

[thebeesknees]

My daughter and I were having lunch one day at a cafe. She wouldn't stay on her little stool seat and kept hopping off it. I finally told her that if she couldn't stay in her seat, we would have to leave. At that, she put on a very sad face and said, "But Mommy, my bottom is too small for this seat and it doesn't fit right." Then she perked up and said with a smile, "But when I am grown up and my bottom is big like yours, then it will fit just right!" People 3 tables away were laughing over that one!

 

[mrs.sammich]

When Ds was about 3, we got a lollipop at the bank. We got in the truck and I unwrapped the pop, telling him how great it was because butterscotch flavor was one of my favorites. I didn't think he would like anything that wasn't a 'typical' flavor. As he's eating it he replies, "Well, I don't like butter, but I sure like scotch!"

 

[PixiePlanner]

"Well, I don't like butter, but I sure like scotch!"

 

[MomtoEmIs&Ow]

When Ds was about 3, we got a lollipop at the bank. We got in the truck and I unwrapped the pop, telling him how great it was because butterscotch flavor was one of my favorites. I didn't think he would like anything that wasn't a 'typical' flavor. As he's eating it he replies, "Well, I don't like butter, but I sure like scotch!"

Too funny!!