Kids & ridiculas "school rules"....

[chief19spixi]

Kudos to all the parents here!!

 

[auntie]

Ultimately..its a parents decision. They know their child best. I see points on both sides of the issue. It really depends on the circumstances. It's an individual choice..and as each child is so different so will be the choice as to whether it's advisable to take them out.
I know that our district has a policy of 18 days for excused absences. Meaning illness, illness in family, court appearances..that sort of thing. After that you are going to be getting the "letter". I found this to be not so much that they are worried about your child keeping up..but because they are losing state aid..and also after that point the district is required to provide a home tutor for a child that is chronically ill. Since they don't want to have to do that..they adhere to a strict attendance policy. I found out because my brother is an attorney..and he actually had a case where someone wasn't getting credit for the high school course taken(which he needed for graduation) This boy was an honor student...and was able to keep up with his work. (he had asthmatic condition). Yet the district was prepared to take away the credit for the course even though he received A's..and passed the final exam...all based on his being absent more than those 18 days. Turns out..this is where the district was supposed to provide the tutor for someone out more than the 18 days and didn't (not that the child needed it) Let's just say he graduated.
I think it's more important to deal with your child's teachers, as opposed to the district. If you have a good rapor with them and are on the same page...in my experience they are pretty accomodating. In my opinion there really isn't a right or wrong. Even year to year..and one child to another, it changes. Times where we felt they couldn't miss school, because there would be too much to make up..or it was a critical time. Also where we'd take a few days. I like to plan it so that they don't have to take work with them..what kind of vacation is that? If they only miss the four days..and have an otherwise healthy year, I haven't found it to be an issue.

 

[disney4dan]

I grew up in a family who loves to travel and would frequently take us out of school for long road trips. My wife says this explains a lot ; but I can tell you a lot more about most of these United States that I learned from the road than my kids have learned. I still remember when my parents went before the school committee when I was in second grade to say that they were pulling us out early for a trip across country. Most of the members wanted to tag along too! Of course, that was the early 1970s, and things were different.

I remember getting flack from a shop teacher in High School who would not provide me access to the shop to make up assignments missed while on a 2 week trip to Florida. He was a mean spirited person who liked to take out his frustrations on anyone he could, but most of my teachers were very supportive and helpful. We live in the same town now, with a former math teacher of mine who is the HS principal. They have been helping us out with a tremendous amount of support while my oldest battles cancer and missing a lot of school. We're fortunate to have dedicated teachers who have gone way beyond the call of duty to help with this and I want to thank all of you teachers on this board who probably don't get enough respect for the extra effort.

 

[3gr8kids]

Well, that's it ~ you've all got detention!

 

[Momof626x3]

(throws paper airplane)

 

[chief19spixi]

Lol Lol

 

[Donna]

We homeschool now, too, but when my DD's were in "real school", we would get flack more from other parents than from the teachers. I never could figure out how people would talk about how important it was for "family time" and then fault those families who wanted to spend time together!

One of my nephews died when he was 6--unexpectedly from an aneurysm--and that put everything in perspective. How much more are kids going to remember about one week in school than one week of bonding with Mom and Dad and siblings?

This really says it all. In the whole scheme of things, missing a week or so a year will not have any affect on their life and their future. We took my son out every year, a couple times, up and to including 9th grade. I guess it didn't hurt him, he rec'd an appt. to the US Air Force Academy! It's a "to each his own" kind of thing, but there is enough evidence that it makes no difference whatsoever.

 

[auntie]

I came in kind of late on this topic, but my 2 cents:

We have always taken our kids out of school in October for our annual FW vacation and I have never felt bad about it. They were always innundated with work while we were gone and ended up being ahead of the class when they returned. After seeing them get half days off for pep rallies, the over abundance of teacher's conferences, and the cheerleaders getting a week off for their "educational" trip to WDW, there was no way the school system was going to tell me when I could take my kids out of school, and this is exactly the way it was presented to the principal, who backed down immediately and approved their trip every year.

We were actually talking about this type of thing the other day...the number days off the district seems to approve for themselves. Crazy. We had a February Winter break (5 days)..and then a March vacation for Easter (4 days)..and in April there will be a break for Passover. (5 days). In between there are days for different events...where the kids are excused if they are participating. I wish they just ended the school year earlier. They don't end until the last week of June. Some districts near us are starting the school year before Labor Day. We usually are camping that weekend, and we've had to make changes more than once because school has been starting earlier.

We have friends who live in PA..and they start the Wed. after Labor Day in Sept. and they end by the June 1st. Their kids don't have a long spring break or Feb. break. It makes a big difference in planning family time. They are able to take their kids on vacation during June...while the weather is warm, but not to hot, and they get better rates at various resorts becaus the high summer rates haven't kicked in yet.

 

[BigDaddyRog]

One of my nephews died when he was 6--unexpectedly from an aneurysm--and that put everything in perspective. How much more are kids going to remember about one week in school than one week of bonding with Mom and Dad and siblings?

This kinda makes you want to rethink this whole routine we've fallen into:Birth, School, Work, Retire, Die......somehow we forgot to include LIVING in that schedule. Why is it that we have to FIND TIME to play, love, and smell the roses, when those are the real things life is about.

 

[Catrinabeach]

We take our kids out of school when we can fit in a trip with our work schedule. This year it was from Dec 11-27th. That meant they missed 8 days of school before the school break.

We have done this 3 times. This year for the first time one of my son's teacher took exception to it. She was quite PO'd and we had some issues when we got back.

Thankfully I was able to talk to her and that is when she told me he was being in a pile of assignments before we went which NO ONE had told me before. So as far as I knew he was up to date and everything was good. Then I get home and get attitude because he wasn't.

I immediately asked to meet with her and asked for a list of everything he was missing. And proceeded to have him complete, find and hand it all in within 1 wk.

Since this time she has taken to emailing me weekly to give me a heads up on assignments so that we can stay on top. Now had this been happening before we went it would of been no issue. But because there was no communication telling me he was behind it blew out of proportion.

In all of the time we have been taking them I have each kid so a report on the trip, along with work like a journal to share with the teacher.

I also think a family trip is more important than missing a week of school.

Dh and I have just decided that when our boys grad in 5 yrs we are taking our youngest out of school (she will be going into grade 3 then) and taking a year to explore the USA (We're in Canada). We will homeschool her during that time and I think she will learn amazing amounts of things threw the things we will do and see.

Schools seem to think they have more power/knowledge over what is best for our kids than we do as parents.

 

[mrsscooter]

I agree with BDR whole heartedly (sp?)...... we as a society need to learn to do this, and once we do, we wont have to worry about anything else. Thank you all so much for sharing your show of support! It will make it that much easier when I have write the dreaded letter......Dr. Mrs. So and So....Emily will not be in school...etc. LOL I am starting to form my defense now!

 

[chief19spixi]

I agree with BDR whole heartedly (sp?)...... we as a society need to learn to do this, and once we do, we wont have to worry about anything else. Thank you all so much for sharing your show of support! It will make it that much easier when I have write the dreaded letter......Dr. Mrs. So and So....Emily will not be in school...etc. LOL I am starting to form my defense now!

It is a shame that it has come to this for you! We as parents should not have to prepare for out defense when it comes to wanting to spend time with our children away from the home. It is as if we as parents have to ask the school permission to take our children on a trip! I wish you the best!!

 

[THE GRIND]

We had the same problem last Dec.07, we took our 13 year old out of school before the christmas break, we had made reservations befor school started and the calendar was diff. this last year. So she ended up doing saturday school to make-up the time she missed.
But when we go in oct. of this year she will not be able to go with us, varsity cheerleader. But we are going in June first, so you can get around school.

 

[chief19spixi]

Well that time has come for me to write the letter.. we are 2 weeks away from leaving.. thank goodness my lil ones school encourages family trips!!

 

[disney4dan]

I agree with BDR on this, we all need time to stop and smell the roses, enjoy the kids while they are little.

I can say from experience, that it gets more difficult as the kids get older and into their own things to take them away (sports, etc.) but we do it. I am sooo glad we have done this and will continue. Right now, we are mostly planning summer trips for a variety of reasons.

But as we speak, my darling little princess (only 9) is on the phone for the very first time with a little munchkin boy from her grade. BDR - I'm figgering that you know what's going through my mind right now and it aint pretty. I know it's all part of that circle of life thing, but that's my little girl and she's too young!

Oh well, she's still looking forward to our trip to Florida and she will always be my little girl. I will cherish these next few years and spend time with my kids instead of my career. I am fortunate to have a job with flexibility, but it would be that way even if I had to find another job.

 

[BigDaddyRog]

...BDR - I'm figgering that you know what's going through my mind right now and it aint pretty. I know it's all part of that circle of life thing, but that's my little girl and she's too young!

Dan...I wish I had better news for you....but it only gets worse with every month that passes. Im sure there HAS to be a RIGHT way to handle that emotion.....but I hav NO FREAKIN CLUE what that is!!!! My heart goes out to ya, bud!

 

[hoosiergirl]

You know...this thread is an example of why I just love this board! So many different perspectives but all come to the same conclusion: we love our families and know the importance of spending time together. It's not the material things that matter but the time and love shared. I think I'm gonna get all choked up here.

 

[chief19spixi]

My dd is 8 and the day a boy called the house for the first time will be a memory that I will never forget. The look on my DH's face was priceless! Pretty much when that phone call was over all I heard was any girl can call and they can talk for hours if they want but why does that boy have to call MY daughter.. arent there any BOYS he can call if he wants to talk on the phone! He then said that there was nothing that boy could say to her on the phone that he could not wait to say to her at school in person! DH is not a happy camper when boys call the house at all. DD was talking about boys with her best friend on the phone and DH got upset over that too!! I think his is terrified of loosing his daughter to a 8 year old boy!! Im going crazy!!

 

[BigDaddyRog]

Dan...I wish I had better news for you....but it only gets worse with every month that passes. Im sure there HAS to be a RIGHT way to handle that emotion.....but I hav NO FREAKIN CLUE what that is!!!! My heart goes out to ya, bud!

PS on this.....I have discovered ONE small trick, its really HARD to pull off but often proves to be worth the misery.......pretend to like the boyfriend

as soon as the daughters think that you approve of them...the boy is HISTORY. Its not for us to understand, its the young female mind...which eventually turns into the mature femal mind, and thats even LESS understood!!! But thats the way it is, and we need all the ammo we can get. Dont point out the faults, dont warn her of his intentions.....just act like he the greatest thing since molded bread(lets face it, you'd NEVER be able to pull off the "sliced bread" thing).

 

[SandrA9810]

The more I read this the more I hate the public school system, and I can't wait for Kari to homeschool the kids. She's really smart and has a really good way to teach any one. As to why every one thinks she's a great trainer in Frontierland and why her cordinator of training always puts her with the international kids. She's had to spruce up on her french, learn spanish, and now in the process of chinnese. Because they generally have a harder time translating what she's saying, in order to react fast enough not the crash the raft.


I can say I absolutly hated school. But I can remember being 4 and going to indiana with my grandparents. Every summer for about a month I would go on a road trip with them, and that's how I mark my childhood. And I learned a whole lot on those trips. Can't say I remember a darn thing from school.