Kids and censorship

[Sorsha]

I have noticed several threads recently on what kids/teens are allowed to read watch. So let's have a poll - just 'cause I am interested - do you censor materials your kids read/watch, and for what reasons?

Select as many as you like.

 

[Disney Doll]

I don't have kids, but my mother used to censor what we watched to what she thought was age-appropriate. And I think that's OK. I don't think young children need to be exposed to the more graphic aspects of life too early.

 

[creativeamanda]

I censor--ie: I read/watch and determine if it's appropriate first. When they become of age, then I hav eno say, but as long as they are my responsibility, then I will determine. I am, however, more lenient than most parents in what I allow.

 

[breezy1077]

Absolutely I censor!!!

I usually watch a new show first if it's something the kids want to watch. We are trying to raise them with Christian conservative values and I won't have that marred by inappropriate influences.

Also, I will guard my children's innocence as much as humanly possible.

 

[Sorsha]

Those who posted before the poll was up (I got interrupted and it took a while) be sure to take the poll!

 

[MineMail]

I absolutely censor what my kids watch, listen to, play and read. We more or less follow the ratings code and age recommendations. Some movies (Harry Potter) are okay for my under-13 year olds, but others (The Ring) are not appropriate.

I answer their questions honestly and plainly, and discuss topics on what I consider to be appropriate level for their ages. When we do go into uncharted territory (discussing someone cheating on his wife, for example), I am very clear that this is not to be gossiped or repeated with other kids at school. They have a couple of friends with well-meaning parents who let it all hang out and it shows in the crap these kids discuss. They're obsessed with boys, boyfriends, and bras. One has been wearing padded bras since she was five. All they do is talk about garbage and it's stomach-turning, so my kids and I usually end up having a discussion about the discussions afterward to set them straight.

Why were seven year olds talking about french kissing? The lovely movie, "The Princess Diaries" came from a novel that detailed french kissing at least a dozen times. That book disappeared after I read it, but before my then-7 year old could crack the cover. The library appreciated the donation of a brand-new, current hardcover. DD read it when she was ten, which is a more appropriate age, imo.

I have no problem telling my kids that this movie or that show is inappropriate and explaining why. I remind them of how scared they were of the bathroom (they were around 4 or 5 yrs old) after my brother's idiot son (aka: TrollBoy) let them watch a horror movie where the killer clown comes out of the toilet. Stupid moron almost undid their toilet training. (My brother was napping and is clueless about appropriateness anyway. He often remarks that we don't let him babysit anymore, lol.)

I love a particular TV show that is now off the air. My kids can watch certain episodes, but others contain violence or promiscuity. I tell them they can't watch those because they're too violent or there's too much "making out" or "getting naked." They usually agree that they're not interested in that, lol.

I loved the book "Jurassic Park" and couldn't wait for the movie. DH and I got a babysitter for our three-year old so we could go see it together. At the time, I worked with someone whose son was our DD's age. He said he was going to take his son to see JP because Johnnie "loves dinosaurs." I asked him if he'd read the book and the answer was no. So I told him that these weren't Barney-style dinos, they were wild animal-style dinos and that there was a scene where they feast on a human by tearing him apart and eating him alive, limb by limb. No problem. Johnnie was no wimp. Oooookay. I bit my tongue for the next three weeks as my coworker dragged himself in exhausted after another sleepless night of dealing with Johnnie's night terrors. "Gee, I can't understand this. The pediatrician said it's normal, though." Yeah, keep telling yourself that, buddy. Here, Dino!

I think that children grow/mature in stages, learn things in school in stages, so they should be introduced to sex, language, violence, and relationships in stages.

 

[NMAmy]

DD is 18 now so I don't censor at all and haven't in several years. When she was young, I censored movies/tv for age appropriateness although I was much more lenient than most on the DIS. I've never censored books.

 

[Explodo]

The big thing we're censoring right now is the news...No kidding. The most violent, sorid, and ugly stories are presented on the news. there's no need for my 5 year old and 2 year old to be exposed to that tripe. Serious, last night the 10pm news consisted of the following: 2 murders, a DUI death, a child being abducted, a kidnapping, a Police sergent talking about terachers raping their students (Female teacher, male students)

That's a whole bunch of bad crap for a child to digest.

 

[MineMail]

I don't have kids, but my mother used to censor what we watched to what she thought was age-appropriate. And I think that's OK. I don't think young children need to be exposed to the more graphic aspects of life too early.

Wow! I'm impressed. (Really - it's a compliment.)

This topic (on other boards) a post starting with "I don't have kids..." is usually followed by something like "...I wouldn't censor anything. That causes promiscuity and recklessness."

It's nice to see someone break the mold. Maybe I'll actually read beyond the opening phrase now, lol.

The big thing we're censoring right now is the news...No kidding. The most violent, sorid, and ugly stories are presented on the news. there's no need for my 5 year old and 2 year old to be exposed to that tripe. Serious, last night the 10pm news consisted of the following: 2 murders, a DUI death, a child being abducted, a kidnapping, a Police sergent talking about terachers raping their students (Female teacher, male students)

That's a whole bunch of bad crap for a child to digest.

I agree and I hadn't really thought about it, but I guess we censor the radio as well.

We all have clock radios and DH picked the station based on the content, esp. the news reports. Say what you will about Radio Disney, but you don't have to listen to nasty news reports every hour. Given a choice, they always choose RD.

 

[breezy1077]

I think there were only 4 choices I didn't vote yes to. LOL.

Funny thing is, I usually censor for violence but recently I allowed my children to watch Prince Caspian, which is fairly violent.

So, I will ammend my answer with an exception based on Christian topics/themes. I was there though to explain what was happening - and the symbolism and metaphors.

 

[EthansMom]

I wouldn't say "censor". There really isn't much material out there that I would find offensive.

But, I don't think that children should be exposed to material that they aren't mature enough to understand. There is no entertainment value to having a child watch a program that is gratuitously violent or sexually explicit.

My DS7 has watched (at home where he could leave or we could turn off the show if it bothered him) the first Transformers movie, for instance, which had a lot of violence, but I wouldn't have considered it to be gratuitous. He opted to leave the room during some scenes of violence.

Likewise, there was a book I recently checked out at the library for DS7 that had a boy who talked to ghosts. I thought DS might enjoy it since he enjoys fantasy-type books. However, when I flipped through the book at home, I found the plot to be very dark (ghosts chasing after the boy, his father missing in an accident, his brother's body taken over by a stranger who had died years before) and told him, "You don't want to read this book; it's for older kids."

I have no problem with materials being available for people who are mature enough to enjoy them. But, I do choose to have a say in what material my kids are able to enjoy and understand.

 

[robinb]

My DD is 9-years old. I censor for extreme violence & sexuality, scariness and adult situations. That takes care of the vast majority of "prime time" TV. We end up watching a lot of reality TV like Dancing with the Stars and Top Chef. Even "sweet" shows like Ugly Betty have situations that are far too adult for her. Although I don't disapprove of transgendered people, I had a heck of a time explaining Alexis on that show!

ETA: My DD has seen the first two Harry Potter movies and we have the books. I won't bring her to the new one because they get more and more violent as the main characters age.

 

[mamacatnv]

I do not think I have ever outright banned/censored a book the kids have wanted to read. When in doubt, I read it with them or at the same time ie. when Harry Potter first came out DS was in 3rd grade and we started book 1 together, he read the series over the years, I never got past book 3. DD started the series last summer and finished a couple of months ago. Hummmm perhaps I should try again
However until in the teens they really only had access via school, library or Mom's buying so in a way I do/did censor what they read.

Television/Movies - for DS we were careful about sexual content - the violence not so much. For DD we are more careful with the violence and the adult content since she is more sensitive to it.

 

[Sorsha]

OP here.

I think I do censor, some, but it is almost all to do with age-appropriate.

I do not censor my 14 1/2 yr old at all. At this point, I am not deluding myself, there is very little she has not been exposed to, at least a little bt, by her peers. But we DO discuss things. If I see that she is reading a book with what I would consider mature themes, I will initiate a discussion on them.

The younger ones, on the other hand, get censored some for "adult" themes.

I am pretty liberal all the way around though, so what I consider appropriate is probably still over and above what others might consider appropriate. At 8 my middle DD has a basic understanding of homosexuality and evolution, and is Ok with both.

 

[goofy!]

I voted "other" because right now we make suggestions rather than strict censoring. My youngest is 12, so we give him pretty much full leeway on what he wants to watch, read or play.

When my kids were younger, I did censor for the more violent stuff although I was much more lenient than most and stricter than some.

We actually encourage our children to read the controversial stuff - how else are they going to have an informed opinion if he doesn't know what he is talking about?

Our 19 year old is in college, so naturally, we don't censor at all for him.

Our 12 year old more or less self censors after we discuss things.

With books, we will make suggestions to guide him to age appropriate material. We know what disturbs him and he trusts our judgment. We never refuse any school assignments. This year, his 6th grade read Twilight and The Outsiders, both controversial in some circles. They also watched a few controversial movies (I believe at least 1 was R rated,) all with our permission.

Movies - well luckily the 12 year old thinks soft porn like Skin-a-max is gross and has never asked to watch that kind of stuff. I would probably censor in that area for the 12 year old if he ever asked.

Other movies, we discuss the movie and then let him make the decision if he is ready for it or not. He makes some great decisions. For instance, we watched Taken over the weekend. Knowing his fears, we knew the part about being pulled out from under the bed would probably cause some nightmares. We told him that and he decided to leave the room during that part. After the movie, we used the violence and the prostitution aspects as a vehicle for family discussion; movie vs. real life, etc.

DS12 and friends (and parents) walked out of Slumdog Millionaire because it was disturbing to them. But at least they had the opportunity to try it and by experiencing various stuff, they now have a good grasp on what they can handle and what they cannot and are not afraid to self-censor.

I never censor on religious stuff or any alternative theories out there. I highly encourage the kids to read, discuss, etc as much as they can about everything so they can understand both sides and make an informed decision on which side they stand on, even if it is contrary to what we believe. We actually push controversial theories on them because we want them to be well informed in their decisions.

If they want to believe in the occult, then I want them to make that decision based on more than watching Charmed reruns. The only thing I insist on is that for every pro book they read, they read an anti theory book too. They also need to be able to tell me why the author is credible.

If they want to dismiss evolution and fully embrace creationism, I want them to read everything about evolution and then be able to discuss intelligently why it is wrong science and can be dismissed completely.

Conversely, if they want to dismiss creationism and fully embrace evolution, I want them to have read enough enough about it to be able to tell me why the theories behind it are wrong and you can completely dismiss Evolution. You can't do that if you have shielded them from the information. Hopefully, by exposing them to as much info about both sides, they will be able to see the merit in both theories.

 

[DVCLiz]

I never censor books - but on the other hand, I'll have to admit that we shop for/buy books together for the most part, so there is obviously a parental filter there. I would say yes to almost anything in a book format.

I do censor movies for content. I am much more about the emotional impact on my particular child - I don't mind them seeing extreme violence or most sex that is in an R rated movie - unless they have said they don't like it and don't want to watch it.

For example, I didn't let my daughter go see Titanic on the big screen. Most of the girls her age were being allowed to see it, and I previewed it with a friend. We both agreed within the first half hour that it was too intense for our daughters. I just knew that DD would have such a hard time with the frozen bodies and the children trapped. I didn't have any trouble with the sex scenes, though!!!

Sure enough, although DD griped at the time, when she saw it a year or so later she said she was glad I had made her wait. She wouldn't have been able to handle the emotional impact very well.

I ONLY make those judgements for my own particular daughters, and I might make a different decision for them depending on what I know about their personalities.

Now that they are 15 and 20 I let them make their own decisions - they have access to Netflix Instant and they have Kindles so they can download almost anything in book or movie format. I've asked them to stay away from anything I might find objectionable on my Kindle account - if they want to read something like that they can buy it in book form, but I don't want it permanently on my Amazon account.

 

[Disney Doll]

Wow! I'm impressed. (Really - it's a compliment.)

This topic (on other boards) a post starting with "I don't have kids..." is usually followed by something like "...I wouldn't censor anything. That causes promiscuity and recklessness."

It's nice to see someone break the mold. Maybe I'll actually read beyond the opening phrase now, lol.

Glad I could help.

 

[MountNittany]

I am way too young for kids, but I selected what I would censor with my views.