Kids and allowances - need advice

[HayGan]

DH and I have started thinking about giving our kids an allowance. They are 4 and 5 (soon to be 6). As it is now they don't really have chores but I think that they are old enough to help out with little things. I was thinking of giving them each $5 a week but it is going to "complex" system. They will start out the week with 20 chips (poker chips) that each represent $.25. They will earn additional chips for special duties or doing something very nice or special. They will also lose chips for bad behavior or failing to do their assigned chores. At the end of the week, we will redeem their chips for quarters. At that time they will have to divide their money into 3 pots - one which will be deposited into their savings accounts at the end of each month, one which will be their Disney savings fund and one which is their fun money. My mom had a system which let us borrow money if we wanted something when we were out. I think that the kids need to learn more about the waiting and saving aspect of it.

We are trying to teach our kids the value of money and hopefully teach them differently than we were taught. I guess I am re-training myself in the process as well.


Does this system sound like a good system? Any changes you would make or is there something that has worked for you in the past?

 

[Marseeya]

That sounds like a nice system! Way too complicated for me, though.

I just always gave my kids a dollar a week for each grade they're in. They have to do basic chores, then if they want extra money, they have to do extra things. My son started taking the trash out for an extra dollar a week. DD isn't interested in extra chores, and I remind her of this every time she wants a quarter or something. She's learning!

 

[mickeyboat]

My kids are 5 and 6, and we have not started with allowance, yet. They don't ever ask for money, and don't ever want to buy anything, so I am not sure how valuable the exercise would be for us right now.

Some families choose not to tie chores to allowance, rather tie chores to a requirement of being a member of a family. That is how my parents did it. It's something to think about.

I also think your chip system is way too complex. I can't imagine my kids (let alone myself) being able to keep up with it. It if is too complex to administer, it isn't really going to be effective. We tried a marble jar one time for good behavior, but I made it so complex that I ended up stopping it because it wasn't doing any good.

Good luck.

Denae

 

[disney junky]

I would wait a few years. Four and six is quite young. I don't agree with chores for money because the attitude can develop, if you don't get paid, you don't have to do it. JMHO.

 

[pixiepower1971]

The chip system would never work for us either! Way too complex for me!

My girls earn half their age every week. They have certain chores they do as being part of the family(make beds, clean rooms, vac, dust, clean up after dogs!!). They can choose to earn extra money by doing extra chores(help clean bathrooms, clean windows, vac cars, etc). It works well for us. I am not a slave driver though....they get a good bit of slack on the regular chores...except for cleaning up after their dogs!!!

 

[CEDmom]

We started giving our DD who's 6 1/2 an allowance. We don't tie it into chores. She does little things around the house because that's part of being a family - everyone pitches in to get stuff done.

Right now she gets $6 a week but there's a catch. $2 goes in a charity envelope; $2 goes into a savings envelope and $2 is hers to spend as she likes (Target dollar bin is very popular with her). So far she's spent the charity money on food for a school drive and some small toys (coloring book & crayons) for Toys for Tots. Right now she's putting it in a rice bowl she got at church school.

For us it's working out well. We rarely get pleas for $ and she's becoming a discriminating consumer. It's amazing how they don't NEED something when it's their own $.

Whatever you do I'd keep it simple to start.

 

[TheRatPack]

We never have paid for chores, it's just something that gets done. I don't get paid to do laundry or cook and clean...so they don't get paid for things they are expected to do around the house.

I did however used to have (when they were younger) a system of rewards so we could have fun cleaning up and behaving. If they did something that really stood out (cleaning without me asking, or doing a good deed for someone) I would let them pull a stick/flower. I had written on each one something different on the back that I knew they'd enjoy. Extra TV time, special dessert, picking what we ate for supper....etc.

They were in Prek-2nd grade when we did these little things, and it worked out. At school they had to pull sticks from their pocket chart if they did something bad so I wanted to reinforce all the GREAT things they did too, with the same concept.

 

[Tigger&Belle]

We started with allowance when our kids were in first grade and started learning about money in school. When my 12yo was in kindergarten he asked if he could start getting allowance if he learned all about money, which he did, so we started giving him allowance. He learned the value of all the different coins and how many of all the different coins it took to equal $1 (in the various coin combinations).

My 6yo understands that, too, and I suppose that I should start throwing some $ his direction.

We did not tie any of it to chores. They do their chores because they are part of the family. They get allowance until they are old enough to start babysitting or earning money cutting grass, etc, so until they are about 14yo.

 

[CACruisin']

Glad to see we are in the majority. We started giving our children allowance when they were in 1st and 2nd grade and have continued since then (now 5th and 6th grade). They each recieve their "grade" in dollars. So allowance goes up every summer with the end of the school year. 25% goes to "savings" which they can only use for a large purchase or for souvenirs on a special vacation, etc. The rest is theirs to do as they please: snacks at school, books at the bookfair, etc. They do a few chores, but that is not tied to their allowance. We do those becuase it is part of being a family. They can earn extra $ by doing extra things like washing the car, etc.

So far this system has worked ok for us. We'll see how it goes as they get older ...

 

[The Mystery Machine]

We also give allowance not tied to chores. My kids help out as needed/expected because that is part of family responsibilites.

 

[momsgoofy]

DS receives allowance and it's absolutely connected to his chores and has been since we started. I read many years ago that allowance should match the child's age...so DS is 13 and can now earn $13 each week. Each birthday DS gets $1 worth of new chores that are age appropriate.

I am a compulsive organizer so DS has a chart with his chores listed, the amount each chore earns, and all the rules related to his chores. He has some pretty lame chores like bringing in the mail and newspaper, but then he also has some important ones (or at least to DH and I) like cleaning his bathroom since it's the main bathroom that guests use, dusting, vacuuming and cleaning his room. When we first started DS just didn't care and wouldn't do the work, but we really wanted him to become responsible for the mess he made in his bathroom, so we started deducting money for work not done and for sloppy work as well. We also allow DS to earn bonus money for doing extra work or for work that is done exceptionally well. DS is responsible for having his work checked which teachs him accountability. Anytime that DS has school work, it comes first and we let the chores slide until school work is done.

I know it may seem really harsh to some people the way we deal with DS's allowance and chores, but DS has proven many times that he understands the value of a dollar. He used to ask for those Pokemon and YuGiYo cards, but I got tired of buying them, so he started using his own money. He has learned the concept of credit because when he wants something that he doesn't have enough money for...a few years ago it was Nintendo Game Cube, he will negotiate a loan from DH or me and repay the loan with the work. He also has been able to buy some really nice things for himself that we just don't think he needs as badly as he does...an ipod or a $1500 computer...yeah, that is right, but we matched his computer dollar for dollar of what he saved, so he saved the $750...so in a way he's learning about investing. He also understands what it means to pay bills every month since he really wanted to have satellite in his bedroom and we weren't thrilled about it so he said he'd pay for it...each month DS pays the additional receiver fee from his allowance.

DH and I are very proud of DS with his chores and allowance. He manages his money very well and has learned to spend wisely since it's HIS money. There are very few teenagers I know who do as well. Heck, my niece who is 30 says he does better with his money than she does and it's true...there are many adults who don't do as well managing their money.

No child is too young to start doing chores and earn money...my great-niece who's 3 just started earning allowance for things her parents feel are important...she receives $0.05 each time she brushes her teeth and for another "job" that I can't remember at the moment.

So, to the OP, what you are proposing for your children is a really good idea. The chip system could present a problem if the kids lose them...that is why we use a chart that has 2 weeks on it, then we pay DS at the end of the 2 weeks. (It was easy to make on the computer in MS word.) But, you are on the right track and will be surprised at how the kids will start wanting to do more work.

Well, I wish you luck on getting your children's chores/allowance set up. It can be a bit frustrating at times, but in the long run it's well worth it.

 

[Stacerita]

I just recently started giving the sweetpea an allowence. She has always had "chores" to do though. Nothing major, just a few tidy things. The only reason she is getting the $$ is because she asked for it. She thought it was time so I agreed. She is still doing the same "chores" as before, but she is more happy about doing them now.

 

[MouseWorshipin]

Why not just use real quarters? I don't get the purpose of the poker chip.

I am a big believer in teaching kids to use money, and that they have to work for it. When this is done correctly, the kids learn valuable lessons early. Just my opinion.

 

[MoniqueU]

I only give out money for stuff that is above and beyond the call of duty. LIke my older daughter will help me clean my youngest daughters room that is a total pigsty. I pay her well for that since it really isn'ther responsibilty but she does such a good job. I have the younger one help but she doesn't get a dime because she is the one that trashed it. I pay my son for assorted things.
However my wallet seems to be a revers vaccum cleaner I am always paying for this or that or this newerst clothes or shoes or back back or on and on. If my kids have an activity I give them money for that. My kids do not do without.

 

[Freyja]

I think it is too complex, espcially for this age group. My kids (well the oldest three) all get ann allowence, although there are no string attached. However, they have to participate in quite some household chores, but that is in my opinion, just as someone above said, part of being a family. They must help take out the garbage, fill the dishwasher, walk the dog, etc.

I think it´s extremely important for kids to learn the value of money and to both have their own spending money as well as saving money. My kids have a closed savings account which can not be emptied until they´re 18, but then they´re allowed to spend their "spending money" any way they want. We usually do not lend them money, except in very special situations.

 

[barkley]

we don't do allowances. if the kids (9 and 11 1/2) want to earn money they can ask for jobs to do around the house (but if their school work and regular "family duties" are not done they are not eligible). they ask which jobs are available and then "bid" a price on it (they end up charging much less than what i would offer if asked-but they've learned over time to consider how much time and effort goes into a job before pricing it). they do things like make MY bed, put towels away, hang up clothes in MY closet or their siblings, dust, clean mirrors (all stuff that i generaly do). we see a much bigger effort on their part if they are interested in buying something in particular or we are going on vacation-but it seems to happen on a fairly regular basis. we don't actualy hand out the cash money, but we keep track of it in a little ledger so they can see how it's grown over time. when we go someplace they may ask if they have enough money "on account" and opt to purchase an item-which we pay for and debit out of the ledger when we get home.

since they don't have any activies or opportunites (without us in tow) wherein they can spend money it's worked out that they don't need an allowance-it may change as they get older.

 

[aprilgail2]

I use the 1.00 per year of age rule for my daughters allowance and it is not tied in to any chores....thats not the way my parents did it and its not the way I do it..she still has to make her bed and helps out with some things around the house but its not tied into her allowance. She has been getting allowance since she was around 3 or 4 and she is a pack rat and saves it all...she also has different cups in her room she divides it into...a Christmas cup and a birthday cup and last Christmas she had grandma take her out shopping and she bought gifts with all her own money for the family and next month she is taking me to the Museum of Natural history for my birthday (I know she loves that museum so when she asked what I wanted for my birthday I said a trip to the museum)-
It really helps her learn how far 1.00 will go...she was shocked when she wanted Yu-Gi-Oh and Pokemon cards to find out how much they cost...she no longer wants to "waste money on those".

 

[Marseeya]

Since this is an allowance thread, i thought I'd put in a quick vent.

DS gets $20 every two weeks for his allowance, and I give it to him on Wednesday, which is pay day. He's supposed to make that money last, but it rarely does. Maybe one of these days he'll learn.

So on Wednesday I gave him his money. Then on Thursday for some odd reason, DH gave him his money too! DH never gives DS his allowance, so DS thought DH was just being nice. He took that $40 and spent it in two nights!!! He's got all these older girls hanging out with him and no wonder -- he pays for everything. A regular little sugar daddy.



I still don't know what the heck we're going to do about it.