Keeping a Build a Bear party "cheap"?

[grumpeeduck]

First, a child or two might have asked about clothing and I simply said not today. They said ok and ran off. It was not a big deal. But thanks for proving my point, it's the adults that care about this kind of stuff, not the kids.

The name of the store is Build A Bear. My dd's guests built bears (and dogs and monkeys and cats).

It's really unfortunate that people can't throw parties without being judged. But whatever.

Well said!

 

[grumpeeduck]

I have a different option to a naked bear

I have seen plain doll tshirts at Michael's - what about buying those, with some fabric markers, and letting the kids sit at a table in the food court and decorate them?

Eek! We don't see them as "naked"..................they are animals...............
and animals don't wear clothes . Honestly, I think it is completely strange to deck them out in outfits. Clothing was never an option at our party, nor was it asked for by anyone, even the 3 that I posted about that did want more expensive bears.

 

[luvmy3]

I find it hard to believe that you have all of these kids in the store among all of the other people there dressing and accessorizing their bears and not one asked about getting at least a shirt.

I totally understand raising kids to be thankful for what they get. It just seems weird to take them to a store that is full of stuff for that bear and they just get the bear. It does seem cheap. The whole point of the store is to buy things for the bear.

But whatever.

Its build a bear, not build, dress and accessorize a bear.
When you go into a store with your child, do you buy them everything they sell just because they sell it and other people are buying it?


Anyway, OP I had my dd's BAB party whne she was in 2nd grade. We set the highest $ limit because it wasn't a huge party. The party helper you get is very good at explaining what options the kids can have. Most of them picked a bear and a T-shirt but a few just picked an animal. The were all given cute bows they could decorate their bear with. There was only 1 girl who whined because she couldn't get an outfit because she picked the most expensive animal.
Since there is no party room, and food was not allowed, I had the party at a non meal time. I gave each girl a box of ccokie/cakes when the party was over.
Also since most of the parents stayed either in the store, or just outside they were able to buy their kids any clothes and accessory that their kid wanted after the party. I did not feel bad for any child that only got a bear, even the whiny one, they all got to pick a new animal, stuff it, clean it and join in the party. If that wasn't enough for them, thats not really my problem, its their parents.

 

[poohfriend]

What happened to having our children appreciate what they are given and not expect more? I don't think it is "wrong" as implied here to not pay for clothing for the bears. If that is the party you want to have then by all means do so. I am not doing anything "wrong" by not.

I've been to BAB parties where the T-shirt was included and where it wasn't. Neither bothered me or my kids. My kids like the bears. Frankly my oldest has almost all of her animals naked and lots of clothing sets she thought she had to have in a bag at the bottom of her closet.

Although I agree that it is fun to pick out clothes...I think it complicates the party TOO much to have more than the $5 t-shirt as an option (Too many choices, chaos, for most kids).

And there is nothing wrong with ONLY giving a $10 or $12 bear.

ONe party I was very impressed with the mom had individually wrapped/ decorated cookies. We sang Happy Birthday to the child and the mom handed out the cookies. They were in celophane bags with lots of curly ribbons and SO cute. I was able to have my child wait until later (after our meal) to eat the cookie. Was so much easier than trotting down to the food court! Looking back, it would have been really cute to have a tiny cookie for the bear too!

 

[mommyof2princesses]

My dd had her 5th birthday there. We did 6 friends, and a $15 limit. No clothes. We originally were doing $12 limit, but with some special we got a discount on the higher one and it wasn't much more money.

I am a sewer so I made each child a dress for their bear. Cost me nothing since I already had the fabric. The one buy had a pair of pants. they loved their little custom outfits and the staff at BAB thought it was great!

We did cupcakes in the food court and NO, I did not give out goodie bags. Their goodi was a $15 bear! The kdis loved it and had a great time!

I also want to add that a few years ago I worked at BAB for a few months during the holidays. We had tons of parties. And about half did clothing and half didn't. I never saw a child dissapointed. Some parents...but hey.

 

[Mom2apirate&princess]

First, a child or two might have asked about clothing and I simply said not today. They said ok and ran off. It was not a big deal. But thanks for proving my point, it's the adults that care about this kind of stuff, not the kids.

The name of the store is Build A Bear. My dd's guests built bears (and dogs and monkeys and cats).

It's really unfortunate that people can't throw parties without being judged. But whatever.

I wasn't judging just stating my opinion.

I don't care either way. If my kids were invited to a party that included a bear only I would just send them money to buy accessories.

No worries.

Have a great day!

 

[Mom2apirate&princess]

Its build a bear, not build, dress and accessorize a bear.
When you go into a store with your child, do you buy them everything they sell just because they sell it and other people are buying it?


Nope I don't buy them everything that the store sells. But I don't buy them the bear and nothing else. That's weird to me.

This is getting crazy.

 

[HLDisney]

FWIW, my DD has gone to the BAB store to buy an animal with her own money once and I got her one as a gift once and neither time did she even consider getting an outfit...and I even asked her about it. The first one was a dog and when I asked her, she gave me this look and said, "it's a dog, why does he need clothes???" The second time, it was a cat and when I asked her, she just said nope.

For the two BAB parties she attended, yes, the host was very generous and included outfits for the animal but honestly, my DD would have been perfectly happy without the outfit.

So not every child goes to BAB looking to accessorize their animal.

Helen

 

[Tink415]

We did a BAB party 5 years ago. DD was 5. The limit was $25 per child. Almost all of the parents stayed. Some of the kids were ok with the limit and others were NOT ok with it. The staff does try to keep the kids within the limit, but really I did not enjoy that part of the party. Some parents bought LOTS of extra accessories and some bought none. It was fun, but once was enough!

 

[grumpeeduck]

Really??? What is WITH the parents at OTHER children's BAB parties???
Bizarre

 

[descovy]

Maybe a post hi-jack... but I have a question...

We have a Daisy Troop that is planning to do BAB with their cookie money. The budget calls for bear & tee (do I hear that they have Daisy vests? because we may do those instead )

Parents will have to stay (safety-wise guidelines ratios for Daisies) I am very surprised at the comments that other parents will decide (while the party is happening) to splurge and buy additional accessories for their child. (vs going back "on your own time" to add extras) I find it kind of rude, actually.

As leader, I am now thinking of asking my parents *not* to buy extras at the party. Until this thread, I never even assumed that parents would consider that, in the first place!

The girls are paying for the bears through their collective hard work selling cookies. Just like the girl who sells one box of cookies has equal say in the money as the girls who sell 100 boxes, I think they should all share in an equal BAB experience.

Can't they go back later and buy all the extras, not in front of the rest of the children?

 

[Mouse House Mama]

Its build a bear, not build, dress and accessorize a bear.
When you go into a store with your child, do you buy them everything they sell just because they sell it and other people are buying it?


Nope I don't buy them everything that the store sells. But I don't buy them the bear and nothing else. That's weird to me.

This is getting crazy.

I kind of agree. Now my kids wouldn't complain because they would be happy to go to their friend's party but I see it as going to McDonalds for a party and ordering kids a happy meal with no fries and toy. JMHO.

 

[Mouse House Mama]

Maybe a post hi-jack... but I have a question...

We have a Daisy Troop that is planning to do BAB with their cookie money. The budget calls for bear & tee (do I hear that they have Daisy vests? because we may do those instead )

Parents will have to stay (safety-wise guidelines ratios for Daisies) I am very surprised at the comments that other parents will decide (while the party is happening) to splurge and buy additional accessories for their child. (vs going back "on your own time" to add extras) I find it kind of rude, actually.

As leader, I am now thinking of asking my parents *not* to buy extras at the party. Until this thread, I never even assumed that parents would consider that, in the first place!

The girls are paying for the bears through their collective hard work selling cookies. Just like the girl who sells one box of cookies has equal say in the money as the girls who sell 100 boxes, I think they should all share in an equal BAB experience.

Can't they go back later and buy all the extras, not in front of the rest of the children?

I'll answer this for me. BAB is not somewhere that we go for fun. It is not in a close mall either. So no, I would not go back later. The same way kids should all be satisfied with what they get etc. is the same way they should understand that just because Mary's parents buy her xyz doesn't mean that everyone's parents should. One of my children went to a BAB party for a very close friend. The kids had a price limit. No problem at all. a couple of the kids went a dollar or two over. We as parents gave the Mom the extra money quietly. She is a good friend of ours. All the kids got an outfit, shoes etc. It was just that some shoes or sunglasses cost a dollar or two more or less. The kids had no idea we did that.

 

[mjkacmom]

I can only base my feeling on the subject based on my experiences. My kids have been to many BAB parties, and they've always been able to choose an outfit. The host decides on the amount of $ the kids can spend, of course. Then it's off to the cookie place for the cookie cake.

My little ones love BAB, and the outfit is way more important to them than the actual bear. If my kids wanted to invite a lot of kids to the party, we'd have it somewhere else.

However, if my child attended a BAB party, and wanted more than the host was providing, my child would be SOOL.

 

[mommyof2princesses]

Personally, I think kids birthday parties have gotten way out of hand. It seems to me that parents expect more than the kids do. When did it become the norm till give the guests the presents?

 

[descovy]

Fair enough May I ask then, if you were in my troop, would you agree to comply with my rule? Or just do your own thing anyways? Please, this isn't meant to be a snarky question, just trying to gain from a different perspective than my own.

I just ask, because it is my hope that parents will follow along, even if they would otherwise choose to buy extras at another event. Kind of want this to be a bonding event for the troop too. Where, you may have all kinds of other BAB's but *this one* you made with your sister Girl Scouts... not just another BAB

I'll answer this for me. BAB is not somewhere that we go for fun. It is not in a close mall either. So no, I would not go back later. The same way kids should all be satisfied with what they get etc. is the same way they should understand that just because Mary's parents buy her xyz doesn't mean that everyone's parents should. One of my children went to a BAB party for a very close friend. The kids had a price limit. No problem at all. a couple of the kids went a dollar or two over. We as parents gave the Mom the extra money quietly. She is a good friend of ours. All the kids got an outfit, shoes etc. It was just that some shoes or sunglasses cost a dollar or two more or less. The kids had no idea we did that.

 

[mommyof2princesses]

Fair enough May I ask then, if you were in my troop, would you agree to comply with my rule? Or just do your own thing anyways? Please, this isn't meant to be a snarky question, just trying to gain from a different perspective than my own.

I just ask, because it is my hope that parents will follow along, even if they would otherwise choose to buy extras at another event. Kind of want this to be a bonding event for the troop too. Where, you may have all kinds of other BAB's but *this one* you made with your sister Girl Scouts... not just another BAB

What if the parents went back in the store the same day after everyone left? After working many parties at BAB, it was the norm for parents to buy extras. They didn't seem bothered by it, but if you want all the girls to feel equal, maybe you can ask the parents to wait until the girls not getting extras were picked up so they didn't feel left out.

 

[luvmy3]

I find it hard to believe that you have all of these kids in the store among all of the other people there dressing and accessorizing their bears and not one asked about getting at least a shirt.

I totally understand raising kids to be thankful for what they get. It just seems weird to take them to a store that is full of stuff for that bear and they just get the bear. It does seem cheap. The whole point of the store is to buy things for the bear.
But whatever.

I wasn't judging just stating my opinion.
I don't care either way. If my kids were invited to a party that included a bear only I would just send them money to buy accessories.

No worries.

Have a great day!

Some parents pick the "cheap" option because they can't afford to give every guest $20 or more to spend on an animal and a ton of other stuff. Some parents pick the "cheap" option (which BTW is $10 not counting any food/drink/cake that has to be purchased) because the point of the party is to have their child and their guests have a little fun and take home a cute stuffed animal as a thank you gift for coming to the party. Add up all those expenses and those parties are far from cheap. Calling that "seemingly cheap" may be your opinion about it, but sorry, it is judgemental.

 

[descovy]

What if the parents went back in the store the same day after everyone left? After working many parties at BAB, it was the norm for parents to buy extras. They didn't seem bothered by it, but if you want all the girls to feel equal, maybe you can ask the parents to wait until the girls not getting extras were picked up so they didn't feel left out.

Thanks... that is what I was hoping. I see no problem going back, same day, and buying to your hearts content. Shoot, whatever they do after the meeting/party is over is their own business. I just didn't want it to happen during the event...

 

[disneyandme]

OP here- Thanks everyone for the help. I got the 20% coupon and now I'm waiting for the birthday girl to decide between BAB and another location.