I've tried everything, with various levels of success.
Today I was at Target at 6am and bought my first portable DVD player. I know I can make it to Disney DVD free but I'm already dreading an 8 hour flight to Alaska in June - so I finally broke down and purchased the DVD player. While struggling to keep my child calm on the plane, I see so many happy, quiet, calm kids on planes and each and every one had a portable DVD player. Now I have one too, Thanks Target!
What I've done in the past:
1) only lightweight and SMALL toys are allowed in my bag
2) small paperback books
3) small disney figures
4) crayola model magic - doesn't crumble like playdoh
5) mangadoodle
6) post it notes - fun for HOURS stick all over mommy, the plane, write numbers and letters and have the child spell their name or put numbers in order. Plus we use them to cover the auto flush potty sensors - Disney has some SCARY auto fushers.
7) small activity books
8) FOOD - breakfast/lunch, rasins, m&m's, granola bars, cheese stick, etc. I go for things in small pieces that take lots of time to eat.
9) we still take our own carseat so my dd has a cozy familiar place to sleep. (and she is conveniently confined to ONE spot!)
*we have special "disney" books and toys. We pull them out ONCE a year for the plane ride to Disney. Better than new because it is rediscovering old "friends" and it gets us in the Dinsey mood too.
Now each and every time we fly, as I carefully pack my bag, I always chuckle because what is the big deal with flying anyway? I toss my kids in the car about once a month for a 3 hour drive with NOTHING to keep themselves entertained and I don't think anything of it and neither do they. I guess if they fuss in the car, no one has to hear but me - as long as I manage to keep the car in my own lane while they screem I'm good...