Just Venting

[suzysezso]

Bear with me, this is my first post to these boards and I am hoping I don't mess up, but I just had to respond to all the familiar situations you all have shared.

First of all, for the Mom dealing with the school making changes in her son's routine, I can so identify with that. Of course you must know that you must make a point of the vital need for familiar routine and soft transistions when you are called to help formulate your child's education plan, and you must be vigilant to see that they enforce it.
That being said, of course the school is going to do as they please and tell you that is their (and your) only option. Then we must resort to the squeaky wheel technique until we get the grease we need.
It took me a long time to steel my nerves enough to 'rock the boat" but it needs to be done. My son suffered almost a full year of abuse at the hands of an incompetant teacher before I realized that his fierce resistance to going to school was more than him having "an autistic moment" and now I must live with my guilt over that.
Good luck and God Bless you and your child! Love will conquer all!

On a lighter note I had to laugh at some of the other things I've read here. My son also cannot stand to keep wet clothing on his body. He will wear only a speedo type of swimsuit, not being able to tolerate the legs of trunk type suits clinging to his skin. This summer we went to Islands of Adventure in Orlando and I was not prepared for what happened when we got wet on the Dudley Do-Right ride. As soon as we got off the ride he immediately started to strip naked (He is 10 years old)! Luckily I had an extra pull-up pant to quickly put on him but then I had to hustle him into the nearest gift shop for a quick purchase of shorts and a tee shirt!~ My poor daughter walked 20 feet behind us pretending she didn't know us! LOL

I've gone on long enough so I will save the stories of JH's elevator obsession exploits for next time! OY!

 

[teri]

Welcome to our board, suzysezso!

My son is in full inclusion in our local school, I had to stand up and YELL at one particular IEP... I can vouch for the squeaky wheel thing. It is even more fun when they 'team' you, and start 'counseling' you on your unrealistic expectations for your child, and label you as uncooperative ... or write things on the IEP notes such as 'parent refuses to accept team recommendations' as if the Parent is not The Most Important Member Of The Team! Oh yes, it can be frustrating.

Our school system does not have regular summer school, it is privately administered. Our program would have been a county program 15 miles away, just for the summer, with summer aides and summer substitute teachers, and only for 4 weeks. Transportation would have been 45 minutes each way, and our experience has been that the buses are often late or do not come at all. Not worth the loss of family bonding time, vacation, and fun activities we did at home!

 

[s&k'smom]

Isn't it funny, we all live in different states but the feelings and situations can be so similiar? I too found with an advocate what a difference dealing with the school system can make. As for what my son likes it's vacuums. He will find it in anybody's house no matter what. We have bolts on our bathroom doors and front door but he is well on his way to being six feet tall and has just learned to climb out our kitchen window! His other things is shapes, especially squares. When we go for walks he has to drop a rock (1-3) in each drain. You really do have to find the humor in things. This topic is like a good Al-Anon meeting. Thanks to all for sharing and lots of pixie dust!!!

 

[lisapooh]

While I know it is important for autistic children to have consistancy there is something you must face and make your own decision on. There is no way that an IEP can be written to force your child's teacher or para to work summer school. Contracts are written for the school year and do not include summer school. It is separate. You can specify that if his teacher is working summer that he be placed with her and i he has a one on one you can request that the one on one remain the same if she chooses to work summer. That is the limit you have. Even with an avocate a teacher or para is not required to work summer sessions and with the current curtailing of summer school many teachers are choosing not to work and orking in other programs that are summer long.
You will probably need to ask your teacher and para their plans as to summer school before making your decision on whether or not to send our child. With some it may be better to keep your kid at home or find a special camp situation or even see if the class para wishes to work for you as sitter during the summer. We have several paras opening their homes for home child care over the summer this year rather than work in the school because their children were not accepted for summer sessions.

 

[momejay]

My little darling is also "in love" with water. We send him outside when we do dishes. I can't leave anything in to soak in the sink or he strips & jumps in. He too splashes in toilets. He also does the rock throwing thing in every mud puddle. We limit trips to the local mall because they have fountains (It is very hard to explain to security why you are carrying a screaming child out of the fountains.)
His behavioralist is working with him, on sitting in a chair for at least 5 minutes, to give eye contact & to recognize his name in writing. We are still on the basics. PECs & potty training, we are also hoping to "get the hang of." Most importantly are his agressions. (biting, pinching, head banging...) He needs to know that sometimes he can't be "the boss." He has hurt classmates, teachers, & his sisters. (mostly when he is told "NO!") He has had therapy & school since he was 2. (some private, some paid for by school system) Back then they thought I was just a nervous, overprotective, mother with another child with speech & language delay.
Speaking of the other one...My daughter has the problem with the wet clothes or any thing dirty. I have to carry an extra outfit with me everywhere. She doesn't strip, but she complains very loudly all the way to the bathroom. She will only wear dresses, sometimes shorts. She hates anything that covers her knees. She changes her clothes several times because of invisable dirt.
Hopefully, my son will have placement soon for this Fall. We just visited another school today. Our advocate said that my son's IEP needed a lot of work. It is too bland, could be applied to almost anyone & not specific enough to his needs. I just can't wait to get this all over with.

 

[Prezli]

Originally posted by s&k'smom
Isn't it funny, we all live in different states but the feelings and situations can be so similiar? I too found with an advocate what a difference dealing with the school system can make. As for what my son likes it's vacuums. He will find it in anybody's house no matter what. We have bolts on our bathroom doors and front door but he is well on his way to being six feet tall and has just learned to climb out our kitchen window! His other things is shapes, especially squares. When we go for walks he has to drop a rock (1-3) in each drain. You really do have to find the humor in things. This topic is like a good Al-Anon meeting. Thanks to all for sharing and lots of pixie dust!!!

OH MY... Vacuums! I thought my son was the only vacuum boy! He woke up one day at age three
and started with his vacuum perseveration and it is still here today (although under control) at age nine.
He has Aspergers Syndrome and is in full inclusion with an aide. He does quite well but some of our IEP'S
have been complete HELL. Lots of yelling and crying on my part. But I am very proud of my boy and how hard
he tries. I am rewarding him in January with a trip to WDW but I am not telling him until we get to the
airport as he will perseverate for the next 4 months about it!

 

[s&k'smom]

Sorry I haven't been able to reply to you a fellow vacuum mom. My server is down and this is the first chance in three weeks that I have had a chance to get on the boards and boy to I miss you guys. My son with the vacuum fettish is busy at my mom's at this moment playing with her vacuum. We too are planning our trip and have just begun to broach the subject with him. Let us know how the planning goes. I go back to work next week from my 14 week maternity leave and I'll be able to get something done.

 

[momejay]

Just in case you're wondering...
My son still has no placement in any school program. None of the local programs have room. My son's school district, my lawyer & I are still searching. They have sent us for 3 more visits to private schools. I realize they are trying, but my son isn't getting an education & I can't work. Our next meeting isn't until next week. All this because he has behavioral problems. (so he bites...they should have recognized his frustration & prevented the bite...he has a 1:1 aide) I'm about to tantrum! Wish I could give you good news.

 

[SueM in MN]

I'm very sorry to hear about your placement troubles. All I can do is send more pixie dust.

 

[s&k'smom]

Wow, lots of pixie dust for you. My son just started school yesterday and had a good first day so let's hope thats the trend. I'm glad to hear you have an attorney to help you. It is so important to know the law in regards to education. I work with advocates and I have learned alot especially because though my son had a PDD diagnosis he has behavioral issues as well. Keep us informed.