Just complaining

[nw6675]

My DH's daddy passed 2 years ago. His sister was the executer. We are still waiting for her to finalize some things and are owed dividends on some investments. Omg. Just venting!!!

 

[Kennywood]

There are a great many variables that can affect the duration of the probate process. If the estate is small and has a reasonable amount of debt, six to eight months is a fair expectation. With a larger estate, it will likely be more than a year before everything settles. This is especially true if there’s a lot of debt or real estate in multiple states.

If you are a beneficiary and you’re wondering how long probate will take, consider speaking with the executor. The executor can give you an idea of how complex the estate is and therefore how long the probate process will be. If you feel that the executor is taking too long, you might look into any regulations that the state or probate court is placing on the process. State laws requiring a long window of time for creditors to make claims could prolong the process. On the other hand, there may be laws that require the executor to act more quickly in settling the estate.

Source: www.smartasset.com

 

[fla4fun]

Sorry things are taking so long. I am sure it’s frustrating. Feel free to vent away!

I remember things going very fast when my parents passed, but it was a very simple estate with zero debt. I think it took seven months.

 

[kymom99]

I’m sure you want some closure. When my mom passed, my brother had to take care of her estate. He had several small issues holding up closing it, but he was able to disperse some of the assets as he went along. If you were hoping to use your share for something, maybe you could ask for a tentative date. Is the SIL working with an attorney? If so, I’m sure he or she wants the estate closed in a timely manner.

 

[mommasita]

Yes, this is no fun at all. My Father was re-married, left his new wife his executor, but left her nothing. I had to get an attorney and sue her after a year. It was ugly, and it still bothers me. Why he left her nothing I don’t know, but boy was she bitter.
Best of

 

[tvguy]

Well, without more specifics, that does seem like an excessive time. My wife had to probate her mom's estate. All her mom had as far as estate planning was a will. House and car had to be probated, but the court approved the sale of both two months after my MIL died, the proceeds had to go into a a probate bank account. Closed probate 6 months after her mom died.
My mom had everything set up properly in an estate plan, will and trust. Legally, the estate was settled the minute she passed away. I did have to mail death certificates to Social Security and her Pension plan, and her life insurance company. She passed on the 20th of the month, and Social Security and her Pension were not paid for the next month, so that took 11 days to go into effect. And her life insurance company issued a check within 2 weeks of her death.

 

[QueenIsabella]

BTDT. DH's uncle died 2 years ago--just before COVID hit. His companion's health had been worse than his, so I think he figured she'd go first, and named her as his executor. Poor woman is approaching 90, and it's been a real struggle for her to complete her duties. Luckily, she has a daughter who's a lawyer (not into estates, but knows the terrain)--she's been helping. But, here we sit, two years later.

DH isn't inheriting anything material, but our children were mentioned in the will, each to inherit a small percentage of the final estate--it'll work out to ~$10k each, ditto for their cousins. Plus DS16 gets his violin (may be worthless, beyond sentimental value, but DS is the only other violinist in the family). And DH is the family genealogist, so there's a box of photos and letters marked "to go to DH" that will eventually arrive here. As you said, it's a long slog.

 

[nw6675]

Thank you all. I truly don't care so much on the money, but more so that his sister and husband are slllloooooowwww on anything. We are type A, get er done people. They are yawn, well, maybe we should get around to it people. Aargh.

 

[John VN]

Thank you all. I truly don't care so much on the money, but more so that his sister and husband are slllloooooowwww on anything. We are type A, get er done people. They are yawn, well, maybe we should get around to it people. Aargh.

Understand your feelings entirely and as has been expertly explained by tvguy, probate takes time whereas a Trust usually does not. Exactly the same with my MOM having only a Will -- *slllloooooowwwwww* -- and DW's dad with a Trust -- easy-peasy-done.

 

[rwdavis2]

It depends on the estate. My aunt’s estate took 3-4 years to get all the money distributed and another 3 just to finish it all. Several things my mother new about kept popping up.

 

[ronandannette]

One thing this thread proves is that it’s a BIG AND IMPORTANT decision to choose an Executor wisely. In our family, having learned the hard way, it will never again be an immediate family member or anyone with a large stake, either emotionally or financially. We’ve chosen, and of course sought the person’s agreement first, with a modest fee to be paid for their trouble. Depending on how long we all live and as things sometimes go, new plans may need to be made but for now, we’re confident things will be handled efficiently and objectively.

 

[barkley]

Understand your feelings entirely and as has been expertly explained by tvguy, probate takes time whereas a Trust usually does not. Exactly the same with my MOM having only a Will -- *slllloooooowwwwww* -- and DW's dad with a Trust -- easy-peasy-done.

dh and i were executors under both and they both have their challenges. no real issue with the will but what delayed closing everything out and distributing the final funds (most were distributed within 60 days) was lack of information on debt and taxes. we had to sit and wait for bills/let the timeline for creditors to make claim expire/do 2 consecutive years of tax returns (died prior to filing for year preceding death then we had to do filing the next year for year of death). trust was clear but problem was my mom was big on cd's and chasing the best rates but she would get lazy about taking trust paperwork to banks and wouldn't get them put into the trust's name so while the trust read that all her assets upon death transferred to the trust, since she had put a bunch of cd's into her name with p.o.d.'s that meant the cd's transferred to people outside the trust so figuring out what was contained in the actual trust was somewhat confusing. same issue with taxes-had to do 2 returns in different calendar years. it also doesn't help when there are significant delays with the government agencies issuing death certificates-i can't imagine what the timeline is now w/covid, back then with one municipality it was over 4 months wait.

be it trust or will-neither are helped by lack of information. be kind to whomever will deal with it by having a listing of your assets and liabilities (what banks/account numbers, what cars, pensions/what if any death benefits, life insurance/who are beneficiaries, creditors/utilities/subscription services, copies of recent tax returns...).

 

[QueenIsabella]

Yeah, the biggest problem is that most executors have little to no experience with the process. When MIL died, we were fortunate that she had an estate lawyer and the lawyer's office had an estate accountant--that's all she handled. We may have spent a few extra bucks utilizing their services, but everything was done properly and in a timely manner. It was a comfort to know that all the proper forms were filled out and people were notified.

Even still, disbursement took place over a couple of years. Insurance paid out surprisingly quickly. Other accounts paid out slower---things were divided 50/50 between DH and his brother. They did leave a checking account open for a couple years, in case any straggler claims came in. Isn't it funny how, on TV, you always see people getting checks from the lawyer, right after the funeral. It makes for interesting TV--"I'm suddenly rich!" "That SOB cut me off without a penny!"--but it's not even close to accurate.

 

[TwoMisfits]

The trend in some states is to leave some stuff open for a few years even if you pay most assets out. My mom's assets are paid out, except for a small portion that's gonna be held for a few years for the "just in case."

I will say, if someone owns a timeshare, THAT'S the biggest time suck and b&tch to get rid of...if you are older, PLEASE designate someone to get it or sell it, b/c we had the whole estate done in 6 months, except for that...and that thing sat another 12 til we got the company to do something, thereby letting us "pay out" unofficially...

 

[shh]

Yes, this is no fun at all. My Father was re-married, left his new wife his executor, but left her nothing. I had to get an attorney and sue her after a year. It was ugly, and it still bothers me. Why he left her nothing I don’t know, but boy was she bitter.
Best of

I don't blame her actually. Having served as executor for both parents, it's can be a lot of work and time when you're dealing with multiple beneficiaries. It's not hard - just time consuming, especially if you're working or parenting and have other obligations. You have stay on top of things and read lots of fine print.

I do think the law allows her the right to charge something for executor services on the estate if she's not inheriting anything.

 

[shh]

Thank you all. I truly don't care so much on the money, but more so that his sister and husband are slllloooooowwww on anything. We are type A, get er done people. They are yawn, well, maybe we should get around to it people. Aargh.

Yup . As a "make a list, cross it all off methodically, get 'er done type A", I feel your pain. We went through the same thing with a relative of my spouses. Omg....I truly could have had the whole thing done in a fraction of the time, but wasn't legally allowed. She was so overwhelmed by the simplest things - and probably did half of it wrong, not to mention years wasted when paperwork was incomplete, sent to wrong addresses. And it was such a simple estate - barely any funds to speak of, no debt. No complexity.

I could go on and on, but would need an adult beverage to continue.

 

[barkley]

I will say, if someone owns a timeshare, THAT'S the biggest time suck and b&tch to get rid of...if you are older, PLEASE designate someone to get it or sell it, b/c we had the whole estate done in 6 months, except for that...and that thing sat another 12 til we got the company to do something, thereby letting us "pay out" unofficially...

along the same lines-look into motor vehicle transfer laws in your state. w/ one estate we dealt with that state's law wouldn't permit a transfer or sale until 90 days elapsed and then ONLY if the vehicle was actively insured. thing is-that same state would'nt allow a deceased person to have auto insurance. we ended up not telling the insurance company until after the 90 days elapsed (insurance had been prepaid for enough time to cover it). some states permit a 't.o.d.' (transfer on death) to be put on car titles so that an easy transfer to your estate, trust or the specific individual you want it to go to can be much more easily and quickly facilitated (we were lucky to have someone who would let us store the car at no cost b/c we lived in another state where once 30 days had passed it would have been illegal for the car to be in our possession absent registering it here).

I do think the law allows her the right to charge something for executor services on the estate if she's not inheriting anything.

depends on the state the deceased's estate falls under. in some states unless it is specifically stated as a provision in the will then only reimbursement for actual reasonable expenses with proof (notary, necessary travel...) are reimbursed by the estate. executors have a fiduciary responsibility and are held to high legal standards-if no accounting is being provided at reasonable intervals showing how the estate's settlement is progressing then it's worth paying an attorney for a consultation on how to proceed (esp. since if the estate hasn't paid all it's debts and beneficiaries have received some disbursements-those beneficiaries can be gone after by the creditors).

 

[ronandannette]

Question for the legal types here: Can an individual decline Executor duties once an individual has died, or do they themselves have the authority to name someone else? I'd imagine there may be instances where someone has been named without their prior knowledge and that certainly seems unfair.

 

[QueenIsabella]

Question for the legal types here: Can an individual decline Executor duties once an individual has died, or do they themselves have the authority to name someone else? I'd imagine there may be instances where someone has been named without their prior knowledge and that certainly seems unfair.

Yes, you can decline. Although most people name an executor, they actually have to be appointed by the court (this would be when the named person would decline).

I agree with you that nobody should feel compelled to be the executor of an estate--it's a lot of tedious, thankless work. Although the executor is allowed to be paid, it's usually a modest amount (coming from the estate). Of course, then they also need to keep track of the hours worked, etc. Bonus points if they have to referee things like selling a house or car, managing heirs who want to pick over the home goods, etc.

 

[barkley]

based on the horrific familial issues we faced executing 2 estates (including but not limited to involving law enforcement b/c of direct physical threats which our attorney said is sadly not uncommon) dh and i have our estate set up to be dealt with professionally. yup, it will cost a chunk of the estate but there is no way i would subject anyone i cared for to deal with it. maybe it's different if the executor/trustee is the only beneficiary or every player in the game is of sound mind, lacking delusions that they were owed by order of their birth the 'honor of administration' and absent any substance abuse issues but that was not the case for us (and when someone has been disinherited or given the $1 inheritance to prevent them contesting it doesn't mean they can't and won't cause a world of trouble).