is this fair? how would you handle this?

[Briar Rose 7457]

the latest scandal from dd's 5th grade class.

the 5th graders have done a lot of field trips this year. at the beginning of the year, the teacher announced that because so many of the parents wanted to chaperone the field trips, she didn't want to be involved in pciking the chaperones. instead, she asked the class mothers (there are two class mothers) to handle it. the class mothers decided that the best way was to take the names of the volunteers and put them in a hat, then pick two names each time there's a trip. they only need two chaperones for each trip.

so far it's worked just fine.

but now I hear that one of the fathers called the teacher and begged to be allowed to chaperone a field trip next month, and she said yes.

I have no personal interest at stake here, because I won't be chaperoning any trips --- I can't take time off from work. but I don't think it's fair to the other parents.

any thoughts?

 

[Michelle]

Why doesn't the school allow as many parents to chaperone as want to? That's how it's handled at my daughter's 4th grade class, and it works fine. Parents do have to provide their own transportation but that's not a problem.

 

[aahmom1]

I agree with Michelle, if the Father wants to go, he should be able to go, just provide his own transportation.

 

[FOJMO]

First of all, I don't see a problem with this father going as a 3rd chaperone, but he should have gone through the class mothers and not to the teacher.

I don't see why the class mothers can't still pick two names from the hat for the trip and have the father who really wants to go on this particular trip as a 3rd chaperone, but not to make it a regular practice each time.

 

[Briar Rose 7457]

I think the reason the other moms are upset is because chaperones are expected to ride the bus with the kids. he'll be the one on the bus. that means that someone else can't be on the bus.

 

[aahmom1]

that means that someone else can't be on the bus.

That should be him.

 

[minniecarousel]

The teacher blew it.

 

[gina2000]

The one reason I know teachers need a male parent as a chaperone is the bathroom situation. Fifth graders seem a bit old for a chaperone inside a bathroom, but I suspect as a school you can't be too careful.

Other than that, I see know reason why he should get preferential treatment.

 

[Briar Rose 7457]

I don't think there are bathroom issues, as two of the teachers who will be on the trip are men. (the entire 5th grade is going).


I chaperoned a field trip when my older dd was in 4th grade. we went to a Broadway show. there were a limited number of tickets so the teachers had to limit the number of chaperones. I was very lucky that I was selected.

I don't think there's an issue of tickets here, as they're going to a living history museum. but I do think it's a matter of fairness.

 

[bobcat]

As a teacher I say there can rarely be too many chaperones. The student to teacher ratio with only two parents plus teacher is too low for my comfort. I would rather see 4 students/adult at that age so for a class of 25 that would mean at least five parents and then the teacher. What's your school policy on this?

 

[faith]

I think the Dad should be allowed to go, but provide his own transportation if a bus seat isn't available. The original two should definitely get a bus seat. You would think the chaperones would welcome more help?

 

[FantasticDisFamily]

At our school it is a the more the merrier approach. Of course space is sometimes limited on the bus and then the rest of the chaperones follow in a car/van pool. We even did this for the 5th grade trip to Chicago - about 3.5-4 hours away. Then when we get to the destination the kids hook up with their assigned chaperone. Sometimes we had enough during elementary school to only have 2 or 3 kids per chaperone. If there was a charge on something the chaperone paid their way just as each child did.

Have never had a situation like the Broadway show though. Although we have had situations where tickets for other events had to be ordered in advance and then you committed up front.

Sounds strange to me to limit to 2 parents per class....

Deb

 

[ripleysmom]

I would say let as many as parents that want to go go but they should have to provide their own transportation.

 

[CookieGVB]

Let him and whoever else wants to go (other than the two chosen "out of the hat") provide their own transportation and go. I don't see the big deal in this. If people are that cheesed off about it, they should let the teacher know that he should provide his own way if he's not chosen in the way she has set up.

 

[Planogirl]

Maybe the Dad is one of those parents that normally can't get off of work but he can for this trip. Maybe that's why he's so eager to go? I agree with the others, just ask him to drive himself.

 

[MaryAnnDVC]

I don't see what the big deal is about limiting chaperones. And the issue BR has isn't about the rule itself...it's about the rule not being followed for one person, who happens to be a MAN, I might add.

At my kids' school, they limit it too, and the teachers pick names out of a hat. Once you're picked, that's it, unless they don't get enough people another time during the year. As the kids get older, less parents are available (SAHMs go back to work), so the parents that are still home (me, for one) pretty much go on most trips.

It never occured to me to ask why it's limited...I never got all in a tizzy about not going on a field trip, as much as I would have liked to have gone. I can certainly see not wanting a mob of parents tagging along on every trip, whether they ride the bus, pay their own way, or what. Sometimes, a slew of extra people is NOT a good thing. I've never seen a problem controlling the kids with a limited number of chaperones.

The problem I have with this father by-passing the normal route is...what makes him so special? Because he's a FATHER and therefore a novelty?? Because he WORKS?? So do a lot of women! Why put more value on HIS gender and HIS job and HIS day off than a working mother's? Geez...it's 2003!

ON THE OTHER HAND , who knows, maybe all the mothers just followed the rules all along, and haven't attempted to bypass them, and if they had, then they could also have gone.