Is how you say something as important as what you say?

[WebmasterAlex]

Sometimes when I am reading these boards I am struck by the fact that some people just feel the need to say everything in the nastiest way possible. For example let's say someobody posts:

My friend Billy Bob let's his 12 year old son play with his loaded pistol I am really wondering if I should let my son play over there any more. Last week he accidently shot out 2 windows and the parakeet. I have talked to Billy Bob but he feels it's good for 12 year olds to play with guns.

This could be replied to in 2 ways

1. Are you a complete FREAKING MORON??? What kind of idiot would let their child go near that house? How the heck can you be so stupid? Do you have more brains than a goat? You are a complete and total loser and you should be banned from life!

2. I think it would be very dangerous for you to allow your child over there. Personally I would not permit it. Kids should not play with guns untill they are old enough to use them safely and then only under adult supervision

Now obviously I am exagerating badly here but I see so many posts that do the same thing in subtle ways.

 

[WebmasterAlex]

Sometimes when I am reading these boards I am struck by the fact that some people just feel the need to say everything in the nastiest way possible. For example let's say someobody posts:

My friend Billy Bob let's his 12 year old son play with his loaded pistol I am really wondering if I should let my son play over there any more. Last week he accidently shot out 2 windows and the parakeet. I have talked to Billy Bob but he feels it's good for 12 year olds to play with guns.

This could be replied to in 2 ways

1. Are you a complete FREAKING MORON??? What kind of idiot would let their child go near that house? How the heck can you be so stupid? Do you have more brains than a goat? You are a complete and total loser and you should be banned from life!

2. I think it would be very dangerous for you to allow your child over there. Personally I would not permit it. Kids should not play with guns untill they are old enough to use them safely and then only under adult supervision

Now obviously I am exagerating badly here but I see so many posts that do the same thing in subtle ways.

So why do people feel the need to post in a mean way? Do you think it makes them feel better about themselves?

 

[HollyJoy]

I agree Alex. I think that the way something is said is very important. Unfortunately, we cannot see or hear the person typing the message, so sometimes it's hard to get a true reading of how it's intended!

 

[Aidensmom]

There are posts like that on the Community Board?

I think sometimes we forget that the words we see posted on a thread come from the mind of a real person with feelings, or that our tone cannot be heard through our typing.

I hope I am not one of the people you are talking about!

 

[MickeysMommy]

Sometimes, Alex, I can't believe what is posted on these boards

 

[tiggersmom2]

Alex,

You must have been reading the breastfeeding thread.

 

[Jennifer S]

Who knows what goes on in some peoples minds but there sure are a few here. Maybe it does make them feel superior. It is easier to be mean when not face to face.

 

[jbdreamer]

I was talking about this with another diser the other day. I think when something is in writing, it looks a lot more serious than saying the same thing out loud. I have notice that people take things too seriously & personaly around here. One comment can totally be taken the wrong way.

 

[Mysteria]

Yes how you say it is very important. Sometimes people react without thinking how they are going to make other people feel. Sometimes I'm sure it's on purpose but not always. People get very emotional about certain subjects and start typing without putting enough thought into how it's coming out.

Myst

 

[pattyT]

#1 reason we need more smiley choices
sometimes I kid - and realize after it might not come off as such

 

[mtblujeans]

I don't have an answer there.....I frequently type exactly the way I speak and don't realize what it sounds like until it is posted. When I read it after posting, I usually go back in and polish it a bit, or clarify. I try not to be mean spirited...even if the person might deserve it. If it gets mean, I move on... But, I have to admit...being a woman, it depends upon the day, actually!

 

[pfishgirl]

poor parakeet !!! oh and by the way you know the SPCA and Animal rights groups will be posting on your thread now right??



I do agree with you, I have seen some RUDE remarks from people but at the same time, no offense, but there ARE some THOUGHTLESS posts made here..

exp: My child is choking should I go to the ER or see if he/she stops breathing first ?? ok, your child is choking but you can't decide on your own what you should do?? Instead you NEED to post and not give up your dis for a few minutes to make a logical choice??

hey besides, without threads like the one you posted.... you mods would be out of a Job !!!



we love you alex!!!!

 

[DisneyPhD]

I think some people take there aggressions out on the internet and hide behind screen names when they would know better then talking that way in real life. (or only talk that way to a person they know very well and feel comfortable with.)

Sometimes I think since emotions don't carry over well written people over excagerate to make a point. However that is what our little emotioncons are for!

I totally agree with you Alex. How you say things is very important. You can turn someone off with out ever getting your message across, even if you have something worth while to share.

I say if it is worth posting then it is worth thinking about before you hit submit.

 

[Honeibee]

A couple of times when I got upset over a replies to one of my posts and I mentioned it to a friend of mine she said "Well, you know, any idiot can own a computer."

That about sums it up for me.

That, and people just aren't as polite and considerate as I used to think they were. Basic manners and respect have gone out the window.

OT - WMAlex, you guys do an awesome job of keeping these boards as Disney-like as possible. An impossible task, to say the least, but you guys do a great job.

 

[wovenwonder]

Well -- sometimes people make such moronic posts that you can't help but post in a 'Duh' manner. In the case of your example I think the first reply would be almost appropriate. It kind of reminds me of the posts that some people make saying --- "OMG I am having all the signs of a heart attack -- what should I do?".

 

[TLinden16]

Uh oh. WebmasterAlex is getting all philosophical on us again. That's never a good thing...

Seriously, Alex, I understand what you are saying because I experienced that myself today. I always try to be kind and considerate in my posting--but mean and nasty usually gets more of a response, even if it brings out more mean and nasty.

 

[goofy4tink]

I think that we sometimes forget we can't see the face on the person who posted. I know that I have a very sarcastic sense of humor.....sometimes when I post I have had to go back and delete something because of the way it sounds. If you were standing in front of me when I said the same thing, it wouldn't be an issue. We just forget. Well, most of us are that way. I'm sure there are those who are just, by nature, rude, argumentative and insensitive. Man, I love my backspace key.....the most used key when I'm posting!!!

 

[jonestavern]

Totally important how you phrase something
Sadly, I really don't think you're exaggerrating!

Tone of voice & body language are so important in real world communications & I feel, that those people often posting the nasties do so because their natural response is agression--at least when they are anonymous!
I do think the lack of voice tone & body language can be somewhat compensated for by the use of smilies, although I have read postings stating that the use of smilies in a contentious context is subterfuge...

If you want to win folks to your point of view, or at the least make them heed your pov, don't be hostile. so easy, so simple

Jean

 

[Briarmom]

I am often surprised that some of these CONSISTENTLY rude people can love Disney.
There are a lot of people on these boards who have no tact and no regard for others' feelings.

 

[Towncrier]

Uh oh. WebmasterAlex is getting all philosophical on us again. That's never a good thing...

Seriously, Alex, I understand what you are saying because I experienced that myself today. I always try to be kind and considerate in my posting--but mean and nasty usually gets more of a response, even if it brings out more mean and nasty.

Hey Karen. Who asked you for your opinion? Huh???