Irrational phobias

[Leenk]

I'm seeking some advice on how to get over my morbid fear of birds, mainly pigeons, seagulls and crows. I don't even know why I'm terrified of them, but every time I see them, I start getting that panicky feeling and want to run in the other direction. Yesterday, I pulled into the parking lot of the Super Target and I saw several crows near the entrance of the store. I actually sat in the car for like 15 minutes, hoping they'll leave but they never did. I just couldn't bring myself to open the car door to go outside, and ended up driving to another grocery store. Is that pathetic or what?

I know some say the best way to get over it is to confront it, but the thought of getting close and personal with a flock of pigeons makes me break out in a cold sweat just thinking about it. Any suggestions or want to share your similar stories so I don't feel like the craziest scardy cat around here?

 

[happygirl]

I'm seeking some advice on how to get over my morbid fear of birds, mainly pigeons, seagulls and crows. I don't even know why I'm terrified of them, but every time I see them, I start getting that panicky feeling and want to run in the other direction. Yesterday, I pulled into the parking lot of the Super Target and I saw several crows near the entrance of the store. I actually sat in the car for like 15 minutes, hoping they'll leave but they never did. I just couldn't bring myself to open the car door to go outside, and ended up driving to another grocery store. Is that pathetic or what?

I know some say the best way to get over it is to confront it, but the thought of getting close and personal with a flock of pigeons makes me break out in a cold sweat just thinking about it. Any suggestions or want to share your similar stories so I don't feel like the craziest scardy cat around here?

I hate birds to. they are gross. I'm terrified of chickens and rooster when I was younger maybe 3 I had a rooster knock me to the ground and started pecking on me. I have been scared of chicken since then

 

[jx3smom]

I am terrified of elevators but since I've been sick and to weak to walk stairs I've had to deal with it, but I still break out into a cold sweat until the door opens to let me out.

 

[apirateslifeforme]

I don't know why people say "confront it and get over it." It's not that easy. I have a pretty bad driving phobia that seems to get worse every year. I do drive, but if it's a 30+ minute drive and/or I have to take busy streets, I shake like a leaf the whole time. And there's no way I can drive on the highway. If I'm going someplace unfamiliar, I need to not only find off-highway directions, but someone actually has to take me for a drive a few days prior, so I can see exactly where I'm going.

 

[Mermaid02]

Hey, if there were snakes near the entrance to Target there's no way I'd even WAIT to see if they left. Don't be so hard on yourself.

 

[ogreenlee]

those birds won't hurt you. if you try to feed a seagull, it might accidentally nip at your finger... so don't feed them.

you just have to know that they are not going to hurt you. they might poop on you, but they will not hurt you. not those types of birds, anyway.

 

[Mermaid02]

those birds won't hurt you. if you try to feed a seagull, it might accidentally nip at your finger... so don't feed them.

you just have to know that they are not going to hurt you. they might poop on you, but they will not hurt you. not those types of birds, anyway.

Little grass snakes aren't going to hurt me either......... but if I see one basking on my front steps, I might sit on the hood of my car for an hour or two........ not that it ever happened...........

 

[MulanUSAF]

those birds won't hurt you. if you try to feed a seagull, it might accidentally nip at your finger... so don't feed them.

you just have to know that they are not going to hurt you. they might poop on you, but they will not hurt you. not those types of birds, anyway.

Ever watched that Alfred Hitchcock movie, "The Birds"? I was making big detours around seagulls for a long time after watching that movie as a kid. But I used to live in San Francisco and there was just no way to avoid them since they were everywhere.

 

[Pixiedust34]

I hope you can find a solution to your phobia. My mother has the same phobia of birds. I'm not sure what caused it, but she's afraid of all birds. When my parents went to WDW in January (their 1st trip since the 1980s), I helped them plan everything including where not to eat outdoors (Casey's, La Cantina, Flame Tree) because the birds and ducks that frequent those areas would have been too scary for my mother.

I don't have any suggestions, but I know that the bird phobia can be a bad one because I've seen my mother panic over birds at various places.

 

[puffkin]

Happens to me with mice/rats. I saw one run out from under a trashcan at CVS outside the front door and I ran back to my car and left. Luckily there was another CVS a few miles down the road. I need to look away from the TV when they are on. I avoid that section of the pet store at all costs. I had a really hard time with Ratatouille and still can't watch a few of the scenes even though they are ANIMATED mice. My cats play with those little fake mice toys, but I ONLY buy them if they are the bright flourescent colored ones and not the brown/grey/white ones.

DS3 is terrified of buttons. He will not wear ANYTHING with small plastic shirt buttons. Metal buttons on jeans and some types of decorative buttons he can live with. He has been this way as long as I can remember. When I ask him why he said they are dirty and yucky. He will point out people with "bad" buttons at stores and stuff. DH wears a button down dress shirt to work every day and DS is constantly asking him to change when he gets home. DH cannot come in contact with him with the buttons on or he has a fit. He can give him a hug at daycare only if he has a coat on to cover them. It only seems to be the small, plastic buttons that are a problem. I found this to be the weirdest thing ever, but I googled it and apparently there is an actual phobia and DS has all the signs others say they have. It is really so weird, but we just work around it as best we can and don't buy buttoned clothing for him.

 

[CruiserMom]

When people tell you to "confront it, and get over it", they don't understand that phobias are IRRATIONAL! Getting through it one time, doesn't always make the next time easier. If it was a RATIONAL fear, that would work.

I am phobic about driving over bridges. I can do it, but my heart races the whole time. I'm not afraid of heights, just afraid of driving off the side of the bridge. I am also claustrophobic, but not just about tight spaces, but tight spaces with people clustered around me.

 

[Pakey]

As one of my tags says, I have a lobster phobia. Try finding out your husband is being transferred to Cape Cod when you have that for a phobia. So I tried therapy, 18 months of weekly appointments with a therapist in a desensitization program in the hopes of being able to live on Cape Cod with some pleasure. Nope, finally had to leave (lovely area of the country, btw, except for those pesky crustaceans). The phobia is still there, I am fortunate that it's one that I can most often avoid. Mine is so bad that even seeing one on TV makes me run to my room and cower under the covers.

I realize it's stupid, I've been the butt of many a joke IRL and on another discussion board, but I didn't choose to have it and I have no idea how to get rid of it. Facing it didn't work for me.

 

[Sparx]

if you go to a behavioral therapist, they can do several sessions of systematic desensitization with you. it takes about five visits (on average) to overcome a phobia this way. good luck!

i have an extreme phobia of crickets, so i definitely know how you feel, and while i have not undergone system densens, it does work.

 

[The Mystery Machine]

Well since my dd is in counseling and getting over her anxiety, it is pretty much the same type of strategy.

The caveat is that you are not going to get over your "fear" but that you learn how to handle the phobic anxiety you have with it. The fear might lessen over time when you use your strategies when dealing with the anxiety.

You have to change your thinking patterns and maybe look into panic attack strategies? Obviously a counselor could help you better than being able to do it on your own. It is a slow process & I would not beat yourself over it.

 

[Sparx]

Well since my dd is in counseling and getting over her anxiety, it is pretty much the same type of strategy.

The caveat is that you are not going to get over your "fear" but that you learn how to handle the phobic anxiety you have with it. The fear might lessen over time when you use your strategies when dealing with the anxiety.

You have to change your thinking patterns and maybe look into panic attack strategies? Obviously a counselor could help you better than being able to do it on your own. It is a slow process & I would not beat yourself over it.

phobias appear when we have an extreme (irrational) fear and don't know how to properly cope with the fear reflex. therapy helps you learn better coping strategies (such as relaxed breathing to slow your sympathetic nervous system) and you will never NOT be afraid of birds, but you will be able to walk past them.

most therapists will have you make a fear hierarchy chart. listing what is least scary about birds to what is most scary about birds. (like looking at a picture of one, to seeing a video, to seeing a bird, to touching a bird) and you'll slowly learn to deal with each stage of your fear.

 

[Deb in IA]

The only therapy proven for phobias is a specific program called Cognitive Behavioral Therapy. I highly recommend it.

 

[Sparx]

The only therapy proven for phobias is a specific program called Cognitive Behavioral Therapy. I highly recommend it.

CBT is a very broad spectrum.
the two main treatments for phobias are systematic desensitization and flooding. flooding is only used in extreme immediate situations. (if a police officer became afraid of something that was preventing them from doing their job, flooding might be used.) systematic desensitization is much easier, and much more common.

 

[legalsea]

The only therapy proven for phobias is a specific program called Cognitive Behavioral Therapy. I highly recommend it.

Hmm, a rather apt response to the original poster's question.

And here I was enjoying the 'here is my phobia' versus 'get over it' answers, and then you came along with some useful advice.

 

[lilysmommy]

I have a phobia of canned biscuits. I can't even pull the paper on them. When my hubby opens them I have to leave the room. Scared to death of the things. I constantly get made fun of because of this one. I try to not have to buy them but some of the meals that my family likes uses them so hubby has to help on those nights.

 

[Leenk]

Thank you for all the wonderful advice!

I'm going to WDW for the first time in a few days and all I could think about is will there be sea gulls all over the place. My dad and brother always tease me about it and I hate it, but feel powerless to stop being such a wuss. My grandmother used to have two love birds and I had no problem letting them land on my finger or feeding them seed cakes. But when I see a crow, I'm paralyzed with fear that it will somehow come after me. Yet, I don't ever remember being attacked by birds. You would think a 29 year old medical school graduate can sort herself out about these things, but noooo... It's weird, because I am not afraid of snakes, mice, spiders, heights or any other common phobia inducing things. Last year I even went into the crawl space under the house to catch a black snake that was freaking my mom out (which I caught and relocated to a nice woodsy area several miles away). Anyways, to everyone else who have phobias. I hope we can all be free from our fears one day.