Internet in Kids Room

[JimmyPicker]

My son is 9 years old, and we're considering putting internet in his bedroom for him.

The problem I have with this are the websites he might accidentally stumble upon.

I'm looking for a software program that I can install that will help give me peace of mind. I know that no program will be perfect and I'll still be monitoring the websites he goes to, but obviously that will be mostly after he's already visited the website (when I check history, temp int files and cookies).

I'm looking for reccommendations. Programs you've used and liked, or programs you used that were lacking. Any and all advice is welcome.

Thanks in advance for your help!

 

[jsmith]

i ve heard good things about net nanny-but honestly-as someone who works internet security and that sort of thing for the military-NO CHILD should have unsupervised internet access -even adults can get sucked into situations they can not deal with effectively-and the world is full of people with issues-even those programs that you think are "safe" or sites that you dont sensor can lead to problems-ANY site with a chat function is dangerous.

 

[Papa Deuce]

Do what works for you and your family. In MY home there will be NO internet access that I can't view... our computer can be seen right from the kitchen and it will ALWAYS be that way.

 

[Planogirl]

You could check to see if your provider has a monitor that only allows access to websites you OK. Ours has this and gives you a password to change the settings.

 

[BriarfoxinWA]

In MY home there will be NO internet access that I can't view... our computer can be seen right from the kitchen and it will ALWAYS be that way.

This is what we do. I don't allow my DS12 on the internet where I can't be in easy view of what he is doing.

 

[JCJRSmith]

Before you put internet in your kids room, go to this web site and look at the materials that Laura Chappel has regarding internet safety for kids.

http://www.packet-level.com/kids/

Every parent shoud see this material. I have attended her technical lectures for years, and she is a standing-room-only at most computer technical conferences, but her lecture on internet safety for kids was the most riveting and scary lecture I have ever attended.

Please, PLEASE look at these materials before you decide to put internet in your son' room. No software on the planet can replace what YOU can do as a parent to protect your kids.

 

[Magic Mom]

Big giant no! There is just too much to get into even with security measures. Our computers are in public areas (kitchen and family room).

 

[GRUMPY PIRATE]

Try here:

http://www.missingkids.com/

It is the web site for the National Center for Missing and Exploited Children (NCMEC)

They have many resources.

having worked it that area, I will add that it is a very bad idea too let them have unsupervised access. Most recommend that you put the computer in the open, so that you can see what is on the screen.

The web site does have tips for parents concerning web access and so forth.


good luck.

 

[Disneyland Princess]

When I was younger my mom had a list of web sites I was alowed to go onto (such as nick, disney, barbie, and so on) and those were the only sites I was alowed on unless I asked 1st. You could do this by putting websites you think are fine in a favorites list and tell you child to only go to these sites. It always worked for me but it depends on how rebeliouse your child would be about it.

 

[ORMom2Four]

Our school district has internet security on their computers. In fact, they brag about it on their website.......yet my daughter has witnessed her friend on the internet in the library, talking to men who, "say really gross stuff" to her.

(yes, I contacted the district, and they say that "things sometimes get through" the security program)

It would be awful for something to get through to your 9 year old that will make him grow up in a hurry. You may find out after the fact by checking the files, but the damage will already have been done.

 

[Magic Mom]

When I was younger my mom had a list of web sites I was alowed to go onto (such as nick, disney, barbie, and so on) and those were the only sites I was alowed on unless I asked 1st. .

When I was younger, I had an 8-track cassette player that played Elton John and Kiki Dee "Don't go breakin' My Heart"

 

[TheGoofster]

My son is 11 and to be honest, I trust him as much as any parent can possibly trust their child, and still, there is no way that I would ever let him have unsupervised access to the internet. It's not that I think he will try to go onto any bad sites, but that the bad sites will do their best to trick him. I've seen too many innocent sites that have a link to a bad site that gets around the best security measures.
The internet can be such a wonderful tool for children to learn with, and at the same time it can be one of the greatest dangers that a parent has to worry about.
Only you know what is best for your child, but I do hope that you will reconsider putting such a dangerous tool in the hands of a child. All too often kids (who are experts at getting into things) are innocently drawn into web sites that are just so awful, and the parents have no control over it (sure they can find out after the fact, but by then the damage is already done.)

 

[Disneyland Princess]

When I was younger, I had an 8-track cassette player that played Elton John and Kiki Dee "Don't go breakin' My Heart"

Im only 17 and computers were new to both me and my parents when we finaly got one so what my parents did to monitor my internet use back when it was newish might not work as well today.
I had a cassette player and use to liston to my moms tapes all the time! Good times, good times!

 

[friendofgusgus]

I have to agree with the PPs - there is no way we allow internet surfing outside of common areas in our home.

I am a children's librarian and see young people come in to use the internet all the time on our computers, which are unfiltered. I cannot count how many times I have been called over to clean up what someone has had "pop up" on their screen - and they are often difficult to remove.

I always advise parents who visit us and sign their children onto the computers that they are wide open and unfiltered and a parent should be present with their child. Most of the parents just drop them in the chair and walk away.

The thing about internet sites is that there are entire sites built just to trick people into going to the wrong place - kids looking for the white house web site, for example, often wind up somewhere completely different - and this is done by the web site designers on purpose. The danger is that your child cannot "un-see" or "un-hear" something - once he is exposed to that image/conversation, it cannot be undone.

I respect that you will do what is best for your family, but I also ask you to please reconsider.

 

[JimmyPicker]

I understand that what's seen can't be unseen. I understand that once it's done, it's done.

We're still in the "considering" portion of all of this, which is why I'm asking for advice. I know the net can be a scary place, even for adults.

What I was hoping for would be some type of function or program that would only allow him to visits sites I've approved.

For example, I could enter in a web address along with my super secret password, and that site would be ok. Sites like disney, and northpole.com. If something tried to trick him or draw him out of those approved websites, he'd get an error message, or an insert password message.

Even with a program or function like that (if one even existed), I'd still check the history and things to double check.

Is there no program out there that would let a parent enter in approved web sites and those are the only ones that computer is allowed to access?

 

[GRUMPY PIRATE]

I understand that what's seen can't be unseen. I understand that once it's done, it's done.

We're still in the "considering" portion of all of this, which is why I'm asking for advice. I know the net can be a scary place, even for adults.

What I was hoping for would be some type of function or program that would only allow him to visits sites I've approved.

For example, I could enter in a web address along with my super secret password, and that site would be ok. Sites like disney, and northpole.com. If something tried to trick him or draw him out of those approved websites, he'd get an error message, or an insert password message.

Even with a program or function like that (if one even existed), I'd still check the history and things to double check.

Is there no program out there that would let a parent enter in approved web sites and those are the only ones that computer is allowed to access?

Go to the NCMEC website, click on parents resources, click on netsmartz411 website

 

[christineann]

I agree with you 100%, Goofster. I believe that there are reasons a child needs privacy in his/her room, but this is not one of them.

 

[Barb D]

OK, I'll be the dissenter. We have a wireless internet, and my teens both have computers in their rooms. I don't have time to watch every web page they go to, and have come to the place where I trust them.

My 9yo does not have a computer in her room, but eventually probably will. I have never "accidentally" stumbled on something, and somehow I doubt that they will. Maybe I'm naive. If they're going to purposely do something, they could do it when I'm not looking even if the computers were in public areas.

 

[JimmyPicker]

Go to the NCMEC website, click on parents resources, click on netsmartz411 website

Thanks for this. I'm going to do the research before I just blindly give him internet access. Until I find the right program, he won't have it. And if the right program isn't out there, he may not have it for a good long while.

Thanks to all the others as well. Your points were well taken.

And for the lurkers (you know who you are), I know "some people are just idiots" but tell me how you really feel. If I were an idiot, he'd already have it and I would be venting about how he's watching porn and what am I going to do now instead of asking about software. But you'll be the first to know when I find a naughty magazine under his bed because I know you live for that stuff.

 

[LaraK]

Well color me a bad parent because we actually let my six year old go to webkins in her room. (Yet another point in my bad parent book).

We use an external wireless modem so she has to ask permission to get on line. This lets us be alert to when she's on so we can monitor. In addition, my husband put about 5000 safety measures on there. Let me find out what he used and I'll PM you.