Inspired by "never marrying" thread, how did you feel different after you married?

[Nancyg56]

I think that it made our commitment to each other stronger. We both believed that marriage is forever, so when times got rough for us, we really worked hard to make our marriage work. We both believe that the "marriage" (we are both Catholic) is the reason that never gave up. I am so glad that we did not, because we have a very strong marriage now.

 

[mickeyboat]

I had looked forward to getting rid of my burdensome (13 letter, German)maiden name my entire life. Don't miss it a bit. I always swore I would only marry someone with the last name of Smith, Jones or Adams. It's not one of those, but at least it doesn't take twenty minutes to spell it.

Actually, I think the reason I didn't mind losing my maiden name is that my first name is pretty uncommon, so most people still know that it's the same person.

Denae

 

[SC Minnie]

I kep tmy maiden name as a middle name and use that initial when signing things.

The thing that really felt different is that when I would get in one of those moods (you know that comes on about every 28 days ) and just the site of him would irritate me I couldn't just go home. I was home. We didn't live together before getting married and it took me about 6 months to really feel comfortable living in his house.

But the good thing was after he had seen me be sick or first thing in the morning and all the loveliness that comes with it he wasn't going anywhere.

 

[beckmrk04]

We lived together for 4 years before we got married, so there was no real adjustment there.

I did got through what I call the post-honeymoon blues, though. I mean, we had spent a year and a half planning a wedding (ok- I was a bit more focused on that he was), and then it came and went, and we spent a beautiful week in WDW, then we came back to the crappy apartment we had been living in beofre the wedding, and other than the name change (I'm a total feminist, and considered keeping my last name, but honestly, like his family better than mine and felt proud to take his name- I still feel like me, but I can understand the ladies who miss it) and calling him my husband- every thing was the same. Depressingly so. I don't know what I expected... No surprises though.

I think the biggest thing for me was realizing that if Iwas in an accident, they would call my husband instead of my mom 1st! That is kind of a strange revelation.

 

[theSurlyMermaid]

I never considered my last name as having anything to do with me being me. I didn't magically lose myself by changing a last name that I'd always loathed. No one could ever spell the stupid thing and I was always at the end of the line. Yuck. I was thrilled to change it.

Amazingly, not a single thing about my personality was changed by this act, except I was no longer spelling out my last name to everyone. So I guess my mood improved.

 

[scrump]

I always knew I would keep my name, never wanted to change it. DH was initially puzzled. I don't think it ever occurred to him it was an option, and his somewhat-traditional family has had to adjust, but it's been a decision that I've definitely been very happy about.

To answer the OP's question, I didn't feel too much had changed. We lived together for a couple of months because we both had just moved to a new city and didn't see the point in renting separate apartments when we were soon to be married anyway. I remember being surprised at how little transition there was, even when we first started living together. It was very nice and comfortable.

 

[Chicago526]

DH and I both talked about this a month or two ago. Neither one of us feel any differant being married. We are both very happy, but we were also very happy before the wedding, too. Maybe that's what it is, the marriage was more of a formality, we would have bene together forever anyway, even if we never tied the knot.

 

[princess pooh]

I was pretty commitment phobic to start with so we took things in baby steps. First he moved into my place and I had to get over the shock of having to share all my stuff. Then we got a place together and I had to get over the shock of not being the only decision maker. Once I got used to that we opened a joint chequing and savings account. That was the biggest adjustment of all! By the time we got married there was nothing really new to adapt to (I didn't change my name).

I think living on my own for so long made the transition more difficult. I'm really glad we moved in together first because I think the stress of the wedding and learning to live together would have been a bit much for me.

 

[kimmikayb]

I was one of those "I'm never getting married again" gals. My divorce was horrid and I didn't want to go through that again. I did meet someone else, loved him, he moved in, we had kids....life long committment. Then he asked me to marry him. I backed down the first time we set a date and followed through the second time and here we are.....in love still, together for 7 years, married for 5 months. Things did feel different. Not sure how to explain it. We were complete, a full circle. I'm so glad we did it.

I just asked my DH how he felt and he said it was different too.