Inspired by "Divorcing The Family At Christmas"

[C.Ann]

That thread got me to thinking - about running around to all the relatives houses on Christmas Day when you have children..

Do you think parents are - or should be - obligated to take their children out on Christmas Day to visit all the relatives?

 

[The Mystery Machine]

Not here. We stay home.

 

[grinningghost]

Absolutely not. I can honestly say that the year we decided to stop running around on Christmas Day, life got easier.

 

[MICKEY88]

I don't think parents should be obligated, but when I was child I Looked forward to seeing all of my relatives..and some of my best memories are from those visits..

 

[Serena]

I was always obligated to visit the relatives. But, one side had the get together at ONE home, and the other side had it at ONE home. It made it easier, that is until I started having both sides at my home. No running any more for me.

 

[barbeml]

I don't have kids, but I think every family with children has a right to establish their own Christmas traditions in their own home. My childhood Christmas memories are most vivid of the celebrations in our own house.

Barbe

 

[Jenn Lynn]

Obligated. no. But I think it is nice to do it once in a while. Or try to see people around the holidays (weekend before or after.)

This year we did Thanksgiving at the InLaws and we will be there for a party the 27th. It is a 3 1/2 hour drive. Next year we will NOT be doing both, if any. I might actually try to "take over" hosting Thanksgiving. I really like to do it.

My family lives too far away. We are all spread out. We just try to get together once a year period!

And both sides are totally understanding. No grief from them which makes it all easier.

 

[binny]

UGH this is the battle here!

We have been switching off with my brother every other year. My mom is alone and we dont want her waking up without anyone there for Christmas.

He will take Thanksgiving and then we take Christmas. Ideally the year were there for Thanksgiving we would be at the inlaws for Christmas but it hasnt worked out that way ( 2 days travel each way) so the Inlaws are throwing a fit this year even though we will be there the day after Christmas.

Its a nightmare!!




Oh well I want to make a rule that we only do Christmas at home from now on!

 

[phillybeth]

When I was little, no sooner did I get my presents unwrapped than it was time to get dressed and go to one grandma's, then the other's, and probably and aunt's house in there somewhere. I HATED IT! I made a promise to myself that when I had kids I would not drag them around on Christmas day. No kids yet, but both my parents and my ILs have been told. If they want to see their grandchildren on Christmas they will have to come to my house. DH agrees, it was the same way in his family and he hated it. I would rather host an open house for anyone who wants to come than put my kids through the same torture and torment I had.

 

[preshi]

I personally think NO. We neevr went out on Christmas. We always did the day before or after with Mom's whole family and then Dad's. Christmas day was for us as a family to be together.

 

[disykat]

Our families live 400 miles away. Before children we drove down for Christmas, after children we drive down the day after Christmas.

 

[CamColt]

We traditionally go to my parents for breakfast and then my sisters for dinner(we have everyone over here on Christmas Eve). I have no problem doing this as it is our family tradition and we all live in the same town. What I had a problem with last year was when my MIL, who just a month earlier insisted she would NOT be spending the holidays with her family, demanded we drive 1 1/2 hours both ways(3 hrs round trip) during a snow storm to be with her. That didnt happen, and a big fight ensued.

 

[Alice28]

Our Christmas get togethers included me and my parents, my grandparents and my Aunt, Uncle and 2 cousins. We would swap who hosted Christmas/Thanksgiving every year. I enjoyed very much going to my grandparents house, and I loved having it at my house....but going to my Aunt and Uncle's wasn't as fun...they had a VERY small house (think 850 square feet) and with 9 of us crammed in there with the tree and presents....it made for a very squashed feeling...plus my cousins would often give me the cold shoulder, that old 3rd wheel feeling.

As an adult, we have done every Christmad but one at our house- last year we drove to CA and spent it with my parents and it was relatively stress-free. The only problem was fitting all the gifts back in the car to come home! This year (my parent's bought a 2nd home in OR) we are spending Christmas AM here, casually open gifts and have breakfast, then we will head over to my parents for the afternoon and dinner. It should be nice.

 

[C.Ann]

When my first child was a baby, we went to the grandparents on Christmas Day, but as soon as he was old enough to open gifts and want to play with them we stopped the Christmas trek.. My side of the family would come here on Christmas Eve and then we would see the in-laws the day after Christmas..

When my DD had her DD she pretty much followed the same pattern.. She comes here on Christmas Eve with her DH & DD and then she either goes to the in-laws late in the evening on Christmas or not until the following day.. Of course her in-laws only live 2 minutes away from her - and her DH is an only child - so if they want to see them earlier on Christmas Day they can just pop in anytime..

I imagine it must get pretty sticky when grandparents live a considerable distance away though because you obviously can't be in two places at once and someone is bound to feel slighted..