insp. by paci thread, help my 3 yo son poop in the potty!!!

[tuckerkeys]

my son just turned 3 in january...we've kicked the pacifier habit (easy), we pee in the potty and hold it in till it's time, BUT the only thing we have not gotten him to do is POO in the toilet!!! we try everyday 2-3x a day, for 30min-1hr around the time he will usually go. we read, sing songs, i have disney foil wrapped chocolate coins there for a treat only if he goes in the potty...nothing works! he says he cant do it. and i can't sit him there for more than 60 minutes! he'll then do it in his pull up when i'm not looking, usually he'll run in the next room or do it while he is laying down for his nap, and this is right after we've tried! it isn't hard, so i know it doesn't hurt...and when he is sitting on the potty i ask him to squeeze and i have my hand on his belly, and i can feel his stomach muscles trying to get it out, but nothing! what has worked for all of you? i've heard that boys sometimes take longer than girls.... in nov we were at the beach, and he even went in his bathing suit, and it didn't bother him, so putting him in undies so he can exp. the yuckiness of the whole thing won't work...help! i am sick of buying pull ups and can't wait for the undies!!

 

[mickeyboat]

Fortunately, we never had this problem. But I know a lot of people whose kids have. Are you sure he is getting enough fluids and fiber, to make sure it isn't a hard stool? Did he have an uncomfortable stool once on the potty and is now afraid?

I have seen people try to have the child clean up the mess he made himself - ie rinse out his own undies, clean himself. Has he seen you or your DH poop in the potty? Maybe if it doesn't seem so scary to him, he will do it on his own.

Good luck.

Denae

 

[tiggersmom2]

My hubby told our 3 year old if he went in the potty it wouldn't get all squished up in his pull-up and would look like a snake. This peaked my son't interest and he wanted to "see the snake". It worked, he tells us whenever he has to go "big snake" and we haven't had any accidents in at least 8 months!

 

[tuckerkeys]

oooh, the snake sounds good! he's never done it before in the toilet so no scary situation going on--, and has seen us do it. his are perfectly soft and does it w/o flinching (in his pull up) when he gets up i'll start the story about the snake in the toilet...funny thing is i know he'll start to tell everyone he knows about how he's going to see the snake in the potty! they say the funniest things!

 

[diznygirl]

This happened with my DS. And although we knew it was a behavioral issue, everyone suggested maybe it was his diet. Nope - he just didn't want to poop in the potty. Bribery worked for us. First, we had small toys that would be his reward if he pooped on the potty. Worked great. Then we used a reward chart with stickers and for every week he would get a toy of his choice.

Eventually we noticed a pattern: he'd get the urge around dinner-time. So we'd make him sit for 10 minutes after dinner. It usually only took 30 seconds!

Good luck to you - I ABSOLUTELY know how frustrating it is!

 

[hpygrll]

I second the bribery!!! We used M and Ms - if he pooped in the potty he got 5. The key is he knew when he had to go and just wouldn't and then would want to be changed. So we finally kept him in underwear and then when he went made him sit in it. I know this sounds super mean but nothing else was working and by god he never did it again after that! The key is to make sure he knows when he has to go or not and is just not going. From then on we'd give 5 M and Ms for pooping.
Jenny

 

[andromedaslove]

We had the same problem with my DS who is now almost 5. He did not want to poop or pee in the potty at all. That of course, was until we got rid of the pull-ups. The pull-ups to kids are almost like diapers to the kids, so my first suggestion is to get ride of those completely. you said that your son will pee in the potty but not poop. We are still working on that part here too. The one thing I have found that works well, is bribery. See DS wants this water gun he saw at Target. So, I told him that for every day that he goes the entire day without going potty in his underwear then I will give him a dollar. Once he has enough dollars we can go to the store and buy him his gun. Let me tell you it has worked so far better than anything else we have done. Now, instead of him hiding when he has to poop, I hear him yell from the bathroom. Mommy I went poopy like a big boy!! Can I get a dollar now?!

Dana

 

[LBAK]

Some of my three's come into class with a poopy chart. Mom makes a picture of little poopies at one end and a picture of a present at the other end. In between they get a gold star and 10 stars get them a present. Simple and it works! Good luck!

 

[Minnie824]

DD was like this...was fine w/#1, but took months and would not poop on the potty. She was 3yrs 3mos old. With her, no issue other than being stubborn and scared a little to go on the potty. Finally, after nothing else worked, it was a gymnastics day, and I said I would not take her to a big girl thing like gymnastics until she went on the potty. And we stayed home that night, which she knew was the night we were supposed to go out. The next day, she went on the potty and has had no issues since. Maybe wasn't the best approach, but we tried everything else, and this worked.

 

[AdventurerKat]

Sigh...I feel your pain. We can't get DS almost 3 to use the potty AT ALL. I had such high hopes too since he spent alot of time following his older brother into the potty to see what the fuss was about.

 

[POB14]

Give him a book. It's a guy thing.

 

[GlennandAnn]

We just went through this with our 3 y/o DS. He had pooped 2 times in the toilet, but then refused to go. He said he could only poop in a Pull-up. So, DH (the pooping genius that he is) cut the back end out of the Pull-up, sat him on the toilet and he went. If he has to go, he asks for his "special Pull-up". He now feels OK about going on the toilet, so now we're preparing to stop with the Pull-ups and just go on the toilet.

Ann

 

[FreshTressa]

My son was the same.

He used to ask for a diaper to poop in.

He was scared of the toilet and of it hurting...and it felt weird to let go while nekkid.

We just let him be, gave him his diaper when he asked for it and changed him. He eventually did it on his own.

 

[MUFFYCAT]

That was hard for us also. I don't know if it helped, but we didn't use pull-ips and bought the cheaper diapers. In hope that they would feel terrible and not want to be sitting in the diapers.

 

[Disney_1derland]

In a moment of bad parenting out of total desperation this is what worked for my 3 1/2 year old just this past month or two....

I was frustrated, hormonal, and just plain fed up with her pooping in her pants. So, I told her that if she did it again she would just have to stay a baby and be treated like a baby. Well, about 12 seconds later she pooped in her pants. It was right before lunch so I cleaned her up, put her in a diaper and told dh to stop making her lunch. I dug out a baby spoon and some applesauce. I strapped her in a booster seat and put a bib on her. I fed her applesauce with a baby spoon which she thought was funny. I thought for sure this was going to backfire on me! I explained to her as I fed her that baby food is mushed up and soft and she couldn't feed herself because babies need help eating. She couldn't eat peanut butter because babies can't chew. After lunch I carried her to a blanket on the floor and laid her down on her back and told her that babies can't move or walk so she had to lay on the blanket like a baby. I also told her that we had gotten rid of all the baby toys so she was going to be stuck with nothing to play with because all we have are big girl toys.

She laid there for about 15 minutes when she began to cry "I not a baby! It no fun to be a baby! I want to go potty!" She went in and went potty. It took a few days of reminding her that she would have to be a baby if she went in her panties and had one accident and immediately started crying about not wanting to be a baby. She has been dry and clean since then, it's been about 7 weeks now.

I admit this is not a perfect solution, we had tried everything and I was desperate. I also know her personality and she needs a little extra push over the edge in everything she does.

The moral of the story is that you just have to keep on until you find the 'trick' that works for your child. Hang in there, you're definitely not alone.

 

[TheOtherVillainess]

We just went through this with our 3 y/o DS. He had pooped 2 times in the toilet, but then refused to go. He said he could only poop in a Pull-up. So, DH (the pooping genius that he is) cut the back end out of the Pull-up, sat him on the toilet and he went. If he has to go, he asks for his "special Pull-up". He now feels OK about going on the toilet, so now we're preparing to stop with the Pull-ups and just go on the toilet.

Ann

That's hilarious. Where's the Tag Fairy?

TOV

 

[lilostitch]

In a moment of bad parenting out of total desperation this is what worked for my 3 1/2 year old just this past month or two....

She laid there for about 15 minutes when she began to cry "I not a baby! It no fun to be a baby! I want to go potty!" She went in and went potty. It took a few days of reminding her that she would have to be a baby if she went in her panties and had one accident and immediately started crying about not wanting to be a baby. She has been dry and clean since then, it's been about 7 weeks now.

I like this solution, and it worked! Yea!

I remember reading a story about a lady who couldn't get her son to poop in the potty. He had a favorite stuffed animal that was a little dog, and one day she emptied a poop from DS's diaper into his little potty and put the little stuffed dog next to the potty. She ran and got DS and told him doggie had pooped in the potty. DS wanted to poop in the potty after that, and mom never had potty issues again.

 

[zulaya]

My DS was the worst about pooping in the potty. I finally got sick of cleaning him up. So I finally made him clean the dirty underwear (shake it out in the toilet) and wash himself in the shower. He didn't think that was too fun. Never had a problem since. His problem was he was lazy.

 

[FreshTressa]

I like the idea of cutting a hole in the pull-up as a kind of transition.

I feel sorry for them..it can be scary.

I remember the first time I had to poo after giving birth. I was TERRIFIED, lol.

 

[skuttle]

Sigh...I feel your pain. We can't get DS almost 3 to use the potty AT ALL. I had such high hopes too since he spent alot of time following his older brother into the potty to see what the fuss was about.

My DS will be 3 in July and has zero interest in the potty. Glad I'm not alone.