Yes, go to the budget board, plenty of threads in progress about how to cut expenses. If things are really bad, I know somebody there has a link to an emergency grocery list that's something like $50 (maybe less? not sure) for a weeks worth of food for a family of four or five people.
At any rate, I agree with the above posters. Mortgage, homeowners insurance, and property taxes are #1. Car payment is #2 (see below for an exception), followed by food at #3 and utilities (heat, water, electric, basic phone) at #4. #5 is life insurance, you want to keep that, if something tragic happens you'd be even worse off. Shop around for better rates (you want a term policy not whole, universal, etc.) but keep that insurance in place! Ditto for disability insurance if you carry your own. If you don't carry your own and you don't get it through your employer, price out what it would be to buy it yourself. The average person is more likely to be disabled than to die early, but the loss of income is just as devistating. If you can only afford one or the other, I'd actually choose disability insurance over life insurance, given the odds are lower for dieing young.
For all of your needs, of course look for deals. Pre-paid cells can drasticly reduce you costs (DH and I average about $20 a month for two phones this way), shop around for lower car/home/life insurance. Cut the grocery budget as far down as you can and still have nutrious and filling meals (budget board has fantatic threads if you need ideas for meals). If your untilies have a budget program where they average your 12 month cost, sign up. It will lower your winter heating bills. Yes you'll pay more in the summer but it beats not being warm all winter. While your at it, turn down the thermostat as low as you can stand. Spend a few dollars and improve your weatherstriping and other small, cheap fixes to help keep the heat in and the cold out. $20 on a few basic suplies can save you that much in heating costs the first month alone!
Internet, if needed for the job hunt then by all means keep it, but see if you can get a better deal. Cancel cable if you get reception on an atena, if you don't have one then just the cheapest most basic package. Sometimes the cheapest package is not advertised, ask them for how much it is for JUST broadcast tv (ie the major networks, PBS and public access). Around here I think Comcast has it for around $15 a month, but you won't see it on their site, you have to ask for it. If you have reliable cell phone service, consider canceling your land line.
Christmas is out. Buy a small toy or two for your child if you need to, but no gifts to ANYONE otherwise. If it's not awkward, you can ask for grocery, Target,
Walmart, etc. gift cards for anyone giving you a gift this year to help you out a bit.
Private school is out. Idealy you can send your child to public school so you both can work, but if for some VERY good reason that's out of the question, then you need to home school to save on the tuition. ETA: Of course if you can homeschool around your work schedules, that's fine too. But if it's a choice between working and being able to homeschool, then obviously work wins out.
Credit cards are dead last. If you can make the minimums and still meet your basic needs, then great. But if not, then you'll need to prioritize them. Call them up and ask to speak to the hardship departments (regular call center reps won't be able to help you), they may be able to work out a deal for you that will allow you to pay them a lower amount, in exchange you often have to close the accounts. If some or all of the hardship departments can't/won't work with you, you may also want to consider CCCS, that's a non-profit and highly recommended credit counseling service. They can often make deals w/the cc companies where individuals can't. It's through the United Way, make sure you are dealing with them and not a knock-off with a similar name. CCCS is one of the few reputable ones.
As for the car, as I said earlier that is #2 on the list. BUT (and it's a big but) if the car has a lot of equity, it may pay to sell it, pay off the loan, and use what's left to buy a bondo buggy (ie a car that looks like junk but runs well and is reliable) for cash. This gets rid of your car payment and frees up more money for other needs while still giving you reliable transportation.
