In two and a half hours...

[ZephyrHawk]

My best friends in the world move to New Zealand.


Ever had a best friend? Ever had two best friends who were a couple and who, coincidentally, were also your spouse's best friends? The kind where he was your best man and she was bridesmaid #1 (in fact, it's how they met).

The kind where you wake up on a Saturday and realize you don't have anything planned and so you think, "Hey I wonder if they're free?", and then before you can call to ask they're on the phone calling you to see if you're free.

The kind you have in-jokes with that even your other good mutual friends don't understand.

The kind you don't really have to invite to parties because they know they're invited, and vice versa.

You laugh at the same movies, you love the same restaurants, you have the same opinions about your crazy mutual acquaintances.

You feel comfortable moving into their apartment for three weeks while they're on extended vacation because they need someone to watch their cats...and you love their cats.

They refer to you and your spouse as their cats' uncle and aunt.

You recognize a good portion of the "stuff" in one anothers homes because, from time to time, you've shared it or passed it back and forth...or just plain given it to them.

You know their parents well, have had dinners at their house, have slept over in their spare bedrooms...

You check the food you buy for nut allergens, not because you or your spouse has nut allergies, but because your one friend could conceivably stop by and raid your pantry unknowingly.

I could go on.

They're those kind of friends.

And they're moving. To New Zealand, of all places. Pretty much as far from where you are now as it is physically possible to be on this earth. They don't really have jobs lined up. They don't have a place to stay (they'll be at a youth hostel to begin with). They've pawned off as much of their stuff onto their friends and families as they could, and the rest is being sent off to charity. Their cancer-stricken/brain damaged, neurotic kitties (who you offered to take) will spend a month in quarantine.

They say they want to be there for 2 years, but you don't know why they decided to leave in the first place. You, their best friends in the world, don't know why they're doing this. You'd say it was some crazy mid-life crisis deal, but they're a tad too young for that. All you know is that they're leaving, and there's no one who will get your in jokes anymore.

I miss my friends.

That is all.

 

[chisnpeke]

That's a hard pill to swallow. I'm sorry.

 

[GoodFairies]

That sucks.

I have joked that I must be chasing all my friends away. All my really close friends have made significant moves over the last 5 years. I hate it. As you get older I think it becomes harder to make the good friendships that came easy (just due to the sheer number of people you interacted with) when you were in college or right after.

My closest friend lives several hours away currently. It was tough when she moved and it's not even all that far. But when you both have pretty hectic jobs it makes it difficult to see each other. She has met and become serious with a guy from another country, and it is likely that she will end up moving extremely far away if they do get married.

 

[FINFAN]

sorry for what you are going through, sounds like they are following a goal/dream and thats is a good thing, really.....missing them will be hard, but with todays technology,maybe it will makes things just a bit easier to stay in communication.

 

[Handbag Lady]

Or friends that are so close, all you have to do is say something like, "Campfire, much, Brian?" and he dies in a pile of laughter?

Yes.

Ours moved across the country two years ago. They've since had a son.

All I can say is that I understand you.

But you know what? They make planes now. We visit at least once a year and email and call and work to keep up the friendship. And we share vacations.

You can too.

And then you'll get a call that hints that the wife of the couple is coming to town and before she says another word you're tidying up your guest sleeper-couch and planning a dinner for her arrival.

Oh, and when they do have kids, you can get your revenge. Our was in his second birthday present of a squishy car that shouts, "BUZZ LIGHTYEAR, TO THE RESCUE!" and it doesn't have a battery that is removable. He's getting either a trumpet or drums for his third birthday. And the child DOES know who we are and due to a severe thunderstorm at Epcot when he was one, he now associates extreme rain with us.

Again, it is hard and you will get through it. Be there for them when their move turns into their greatest adventure or their biggest flop.

 

[ChrizJen]

Wow...We do have friends like that. I was able to check off every item on your list.

I'm sorry they're leaving. That's really tough. Our best friends talked for a while about possibly having to move across the country (for financial reasons, a job was available elsewhere that they could not have here). Fortunately, that didn't happen, and they're still here (for now).

I don't know what I'll do the day that we have to say goodbye.
We're the type of people who limit ourselves to just a few really really great friends. We have plenty of friends and acquaintances, but it's different with those select few who are our "BFF's". And we like it that way. But it can really suck at times like this. Hopefully you'll be able to keep contact. It's especially hard for you. They at least have the move to look forward to and be excited about. You're the ones being left behind.